Disclaimer: Hikaru No Go does not belong to me, and characters from it are used without permission. Only the plot of this story belongs to me.

==========

Reviews! Reviews!! They're just wonderful sources of encouragement. Thanks for all the reviews I've got for the previous chapter. And here's the next chapter! (By the way, I'd changed my penname from Crystal Orb to FloriaCharms; just a note...)

==========

My Heart Within

V. Power of Care

----

Days are bright in your presence. But they grew dark in your absence.

Would it continue this way—obscuring my view—or would the dark clouds leave, revealing a rainbow......

----

A dim light crept in from the windows, signally the break of dawn. I rubbed my eyes and looked at my alarm clock. I was a bit later than usual, but still, I was earlier than I have to be. Feeling lazy, I lie down on my bed, my eyes transfixed at the white ceiling; it was no doubt that thoughts had once more, found their way into my mind.

I recalled the many things which happened over the past few months, but particularly yesterday. When I met Hikaru in school, he had actually smiled at me. But behind the smile, I could still feel a tinge of sadness that lingered on. Maybe he felt more than a tinge, but had hidden it so well – he had learnt to hide his feelings.

There was something I really wished to do; to help relieve this pain which seemed to have conjured a mist on his path. He seemed lost, stressed, disheartened. Maybe this feeling will last through his whole life, but he should know what to do, how to go on with his life – to see the path lying ahead of him.

I finally stood up, stretched and got my uniform. As I walked into the bathroom, a thought slowly descend upon my mind: care is something powerful to help heal a wound, and smile together with encouragement will bring about it. I didn't know why I had suddenly came up with this, but I had the feeling that it is true, and I must try......

==

Hours in school ended so quickly that I thought I had to be dreaming. As the bell rang, conversation between people grew louder and the whole school was soon engulfed by a cheery and noisy atmosphere. I gathered my things on the table and headed for the lockers.

Finally, I staggered to the gates of my school under the weight of my bulky bag, hoping to be home soon, away from the crowd.

As I was about to turn round a corner, I heard a familiar voice which, however, was in a dangerous tone. I strained my ear to listen to whatever that was going on, even when I had no idea who it was.

"Stop giving that awful sorry look! I must tell you you're worrying her so much! In fact, you're hurting her! I've seen her these few days – walking around as if she lived in her own world. Forgetting the greetings she used to give us! All our club members could see the she's bothered!" The voice was growing louder by the second, as though the speaker was getting angrier.

I edged closer and peered over to look at who was talking, just as a second voice sounded, "... I'm sorry I've ever did that to Akari -"

On hearing my name, and seeing that it was Mitani and Hikaru, I gasped so loudly and quickly retreated, but I know it was too late.

"Who's that?" Mitani called as his footsteps neared. He halted when he saw that it was me, and stared apprehensively, "Fujisaki? Were you here all along?"

Few seconds later, Hikaru arrived too. I found my voice and spoke, "Mitani, I know...you and the whole of Go club – all of you – care about me, but all that I'd been feeling, or showing on my face, had nothing to do with Hikaru... you shouldn't have talked to him in that manner..." As I said this, Mitani's face changed, looking a bit embarrassed.

"You heard all of it?" He choked.

"No, I didn't, I'd just arrived -" I tried to explain but was cut off by Mitani, it was obvious that he hadn't taken in a word that I've just said.

"Well, I don't blame you for saying I'm wrong and overhearing our conversation... But you should know that keeping your emotions to yourself will only hurt more. And if it is somebody's fault," he eyed Hikaru angrily, "and the person didn't even make an effort to help you, you should stay away from him." He made no effort to not emphasise on the word "him" and continued, "Well, I'd better get going, see you, Fujisaki." With one last threatening look at Hikaru, he strode off, back towards our school building.

I looked away into the distant and finally heard a voice, "Akari... what Mitani had said was reasonable, after all... you hide a lot of your emotions..." This voice was rare; it was so long ago that I've heard it utter a whole sentence. I really wish I will hear more of it...

I turned and gazed into Hikaru's eyes, "Hikaru... you've lost a lot of things I like about you, your cheerfulness, where has it gone to? Your recklessness, even if it's no longer around, you're still doing things the wrong way. When are you going to overcome this obstacle you're facing right now? Is running away all that you're going to do?..."

Hikaru remained silent, as though understanding something, "I'm sorry, Akari." He spoke with his voice filled with remorse. But I wasn't going to accept just this, "Come with me!" and I did something I've never done in years—I grabbed his hand and pulled. My face would have blushed more if the situation was less serious.

I dragged him to the park; he made no move to restrain. I halted when I've came to somewhere near the lake. I pointed out towards the lake and panted, "Shout out to the lake! Shout out whatever that's paining you!" And as if demonstrating, I cupped my hands around my mouth and yelled out with all my might. The effect was tremendous. It was just like removing something that's been hindering for a long time. "Do it and you'll feel better..." I told Hikaru, who was looking a bit surprise.

"It won't work, Akari -" he started, his face had settled on a pleading look.

"Hikaru, don't say it won't work when you've never try," my heart was feeling determined, but my voice changed to be as gentle as I could. "Hikaru... what happened? Why have you become like this?...Did you...did you lost something, something precious, something you've treasured..." I was saying everything according to my intuition...

Hikaru's face suddenly sank and his eyes changed, even though he looked more mature, but I didn't like the feeling, I've got to get rid of it... but only slowly... "Hikaru, share it with me... let it out... I... I wish to help you... if saying out is a relief..."

Maybe I did everything rather forcefully, maybe I've hurt him, but I really hope I was helping him. I hate the sadness that was around him. I missed the childhood Hikaru. I know it's impossible to get back, but I don't mind, just so long that Hikaru doesn't remain like this...

==

I absentmindedly pushed back the front doors of my house and stepped into the quiet hall.

"Akari, you're back. Why were you so late?" my mum asked and I looked with a mild astonishment at her, "mum, you're back so early?"

"Oh my, don't you remember. I told you this morning..." she said sweetly and motioned for me to go upstairs, "get a nice bath quickly and come down to enjoy your dinner, it's ready." She smiled at me, and entered the kitchen.

I staggered upstairs, wondering what Hikaru had said, just moments ago, but it all seemed vague. My mind swam with images I heard him described, all of which that's most intriguing, was the presence of another being these few years, and which I had not noticed... He said that it had followed him everywhere... but why'd I never seen it? Why was I unable to see it?

Fujiwarano Sai... someone mysterious... yet close to Hikaru... someone who's a teacher... yet a friend... someone who appeared and taught him the game of Go... yet disappeared and caused him to lost all hope in the game...

Hikaru wanted to let him play... but he never came back. Hikaru dared not continue to play... because he feared that Sai would never come back... He regretted that he hardly ever give Sai a chance to play, and even promised never to touch the game anymore... only awaiting Sai's return...

I shut myself in the room after dinner, trying to piece all information I'd known about the last few years... but it was tedious. The feelings I felt now was somewhat similar to that of Hikaru's. I was beginning to understand how he had faced this incident all these months, by himself... It was... most disheartening... I recalled the teary face Hikaru wore as he told me the whole incident, and the sadness that fully showed from within him... I'd never thought he would face anything like this... I didn't want to think. Someone that precious... to leave... alone to yourself... lost... My heart felt the strangest fear... I don't want that to happen... never...

"Akari, what are you doing?" I heard my mum's knocks on the door and spun quickly as though out of a trance. I felt as though my body had gone rigid. I heard the door being pushed open and mum came in. She closed the door and walked towards me, then sat down beside in the bed, "Akari, are you all right? You looked very troubled..." Mum spoke in the tenderest tone I've heard and I could feel my dreamy eyes rolling slowly to meet hers.

There was silence for a long moment, and I'd suddenly felt an overwhelming misery overcame me, hot tears rolled down my cheeks. I felt myself being snuggled up into a warm hug... words which might've sounded nonsensical escaped my mouth... "I don't want to lose anybody close to me... mum... I want to stay by your side forever, with dad too... I don't want to lose anybody and regret..."

Perhaps I transferred some of my emotions to my mother, for I felt her trembling as she spoke, "I would never leave you too, Akari, my dear..."

Even if I didn't tell her what happened, I had the slightest feeling that she understood everything... we hugged until I'd lost track of time. Everything which happened on that day was vague yet vivid. I only remembered that I lay quiet on my back, with my blankets up to my chin, as the lights went off and the door closed...

==========

Sorry to have taken such a long time to update, if you've been waiting. But I've been feeling more and more difficult to get myself to write as the story continues (perhaps I didn't manage my story well) Anyway, how'd this chapter been? Akari might seemed to be a bit OOC, but hope that you don't mind. This'd been the longest chapter so far. So, I'll love to see ya reviews! : )