Charlie: Well…err, yeah, nothing much to say. Second chapter…just poor poor Patric.
Tidus: Patric
Yuna: Yvonne
Wakka: Dennis
Lulu: Jessica
Rikku: Audrey
Auron: Chris
Kimahri: Charlie
I don't own Final Fantasy X yeah. I have this idea for like after a few chapters I do a funny break where the characters insult something else instead of being insulted, but we'll see. Oh and sorry about my extreme slowness, but I'm currently trying to piss off the entire Fire Emblem section, err…yeah ; Heh, anyways. After this Chapter, I'll be gone for a week in London with my school's Wind Ensemble. So I guess I'll be seeing you guys in a week or two. And I'm sorry for the syntax, but really needs to fix quickedit.
"Okay cool!" Audrey was saying. "We found this huge wreck down there, and we need you to salvage it for us.
"Wait a minute…" Patric was saying. "You want me…to go down…there?" He asked, making very obvious hand gestures towards the murky depth.
"Right…down there." Audrey nodded.
"So…how the hell am I supposed to breathe?" Patric asked.
"Hold your breath or something!" Audrey said. "I'm coming down with you."
"…Look, Audrey…I don't really know what you're smoking right now, because unless it only takes us like five minutes to get everything done, there's no way we can hold our breaths that long." Patric reasoned.
"Yes we can." Audrey said defiantly, and then she pushed Patric into the water. "Oxygen is for sissies! Haven't you heard that before?"
"I'm not from around here…" Patric muttered, his thoughts flashing back to that moron Chris.
Chris had grabbed him by the collar, pushing up towards the spinning vortex of DOOM! …or so Patric thought it was.
"The hell are you doing!" He screamed frantically. "KILLING ME!"
"…no…" was Chris' simple reply. "This is your story…"
Patric thought that Chris had finally gone off the deep end.
"Uhh…you're failing at being bad ass to me if that's your goal right now…"
Chris sighed and shook his head before tossing Patric into the vortex of doom.
Patric was amazed that his body could sustain itself underwater without him needing to breath in this brand new world. As he swam through the water, he began doing a series of stunts and flips before Audrey's voice brought him back to reality.
"Hey moron!" She yelled at him from the surface. "Come on before I have one of the boys upstairs shoot you!"
Patric grumbled and followed Audrey. Since they still couldn't talk underwater, Audrey pointed to a huge chain that was leading to an underwater structure.
Patric and Audrey followed the chain into the structure. Once inside, they were immediately ambushed by a few piranhas. Patric immediately pulled out his huge ass sword that kinda seems to just materialize out of nowhere. Patric immediately swam over and slashed at the annoying fish.
To his surprise and amazement, the sword made a little scratch on the tiny fish, but not much. He stared down at his humongous sharp blade in disgust. The thing was practically useless.
Audrey took the situation in calmly as if she knew Patric's blade wouldn't kill the fish. Quickly, she swam over the annoying piranhas and grabbed a grenade from the pesky fish before neutralizing the frisky thing with it.
All Patric could do was gape and wonder how Audrey stole a freaking grenade from a fish. However, not one to dwell on thoughts long, he soon found himself following Audrey into the abandoned building. Once inside, the duo found, not to their surprise, that the door was locked, sealed and in all ways impossible to open without a quarter stick of dynamite. Patric threw up his hands and grinned at Audrey, hoping to make the young girl feel foolish.
Audrey, not one to give up so easily, stared Patric straight in the eyes and pointed to a rusted old control panel. Patric caught the girl's gaze and stared at the lifeless piece of junk she was pointing at .
'She's kidding right?' His mind screamed.
Seeing that her friend wouldn't budge, Audrey made a few menacing gestures with her spiky gloves. Patric, not wanting to fight now, sighed and went over to the panel. He stared at the lifeless thing and the indecipherable text, wondering what to do. Finding no other options, he went with the old fashioned technique. Rolling his hands into fists, he pounded the hunk of junk over and over again, musing at the stupidity of it all.
Then, much to his ego's dismay, the doorway in front of the two slid open effortlessly. Audrey let loose a stream of bubbles in delight and swam in. Patric sighed and followed, wondering what other wonderful thing would happen next. As soon as he entered the doorway, he was rewarded by a piranha bite to the legs. Swiping backwards, the man managed to get the pesky fish to let go.
Audrey found her backup bogged down by fishes again and sighed.
'Men are so useless these days…' She thought before lobbing another grenade.
The explosive killed the fish instantly and took off a few hairs from Patric's head. The man gave Audrey a death glare before following her into the center of the ruin. Inside the center was a huge reactor for god knows what. Once again, Audrey menaced with her gloves and pointed at the reactor. Patric sighed again and went into the reactor, wondering what possible good he can do at blindly jabbing everything that looks remotely like a button.
Presently, he found something labeled "on." He decided to push it. In retrospect, he realized that he really shouldn't have pushed the thing while he was inside the reactor bars. But in retrospect, he wondered why the people would have an on button where the person who pushes it would be fried instantly anyways. After barely escaping with his life, Audrey smiled at him and motioned him towards the exit. Patric let out a stream of bubbles in relief and began to follow the girl out of the center.
Just as he thought he was about to reach the open sea and back to the deck of the boat, a gigantical squid appears and knocks the wind out of the poor man. After catching his breath, Patric stared at the squid in blind fury.
'Always!' He thought angrily. 'There is AlWAYS a freaking catch. Why the hell can't this be simple?'
He quickly drew his sword and prepared to slice that thing into bite sized pieces. The squid was no pushover. After miraculously surviving dozens of scratches and even more grenade blasts, the squid still pummeled the duo while Patric was beginning to feel tired. Then, pushing all his strength into one final blow, he heaved his sword into the squid, expecting to be knocked into the wall by a tentacle. Amazingly, the squid shuddered, and died instantly, his body dissolving into millions of glowing dust things.
Patric stared at the dissolving remains. He wondered how the squid was still hitting at full strength even on the verge of death, but as he thought, Audrey did the same as well, so he concluded that in this world, it was either "Alive and kicking" or "dead." There was no middle ground. He sighed, it was going to be a long…LONG time before he got used to this.
When the two finally reached the surface, Patric grabbed a blanket and curled up in a corner as he watched the people on board scurry about frantically. Soon he drifted into a blissful sleep.
It was a while before he woke up. The excitement had died down and half the crew went below the deck again. Patric got up and moved over to the railing to look out at the endless expanse. A bit later, he felt another presence.
"It's amazing, we found an entire fortress down there. I think we can excavate soon and get to the real goods." She blabbered on excitedly.
Patric smiled and nodded politely, but he wasn't really paying attention. He was focused on getting back home. Just then he felt a prod on his shoulder.
"Say," Audrey asked, poking him. "What do you do for a living before you washed up here?"
Patric looked at her and said proudly. "I played blitzball."
Audrey lighted up. "Really? What team?"
Patric didn't need an invitation. "The Zanarkand Abes!"
He was surprised to see Audrey stare at him as if he were crazy.
"Are you on crack?" She asked.
"WHAT!"
"Zanarkand's gone." Audrey explained. "It's been destroyed for a thousand years."
Patric stared at her in disbelief. "…umm…uhh…but…I…was…and…umm…huge…fin…creature…blah…" He jabbered.
Audrey pulled various words from his garbled speech and managed to connect "huge fin creature" with what she called Sin. She quickly deduced that he had been poisoned by Sin's toxin.
"I know!" She said, sounding like a doctor. "We'll take you to Luca! There, you can maybe find someone who recognizes you?"
Patric was sure that Audrey was the one on crack, not him. For one thing, his memory was perfect. He remembers just about everything that happened since that horrible attack by that but ugly creature. Second of all, if he got transported 1000 years into the future, the obviously nobody is going to recognize him. He was just about to point this out when the boat lurched from numerous geysers in the water. Almost immediately, he was swept overboard into a whirlpool while everyone else stayed perfectly steady on the boat, and miraculously, nobody else seemingly even got wet. As he sank into the whirlpool, he knew that someone, something was out to get him. Before he sank into unconsciousness, he had but one phrase to say…
"…Somebody…out there, hates me."
With that, he sank into a dreamless sleep, not knowing if he was dead, or merely unconscious.
Charlie: Yeah, I thought the game dialogue was unrealistic, and the fact that an ancient door would open just by getting pounded, so I took a few liberties. Well, thanks to everyone who reviewed, and if you have any objections, let me know. Well, keep reading and reviewing (I hope). See ya in a few weeks. I bring inspiration from London.
