Title: The letter
Summary: Mac reads a letter Harm had left for her.
Disclaimer: I don't own JAG or any of its characters. I don't own the song either.
A/N: I know I should be writing the next chapter for Strange and stalking but inspiration came for this one instead. And to think this was going to be a little ficlet. Hmmm…Oh and no song in this one...lol
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The day of Harm's funeral, Mac was approached by a man in a business suit. She had seen that man a few times and recognized him as Harm's lawyer. He was the one who was distributing all of Harm's belongings. That day, he had handed Mac an envelope. She had forgotten about it until today.
Today, the apartment is dark except for one lamp shining its dull light. Next to that lamp sat Mac, staring at the envelope she held in her hands. The envelope was addressed to her, in Harm's handwriting. A tear slipped down her cheek and dropped onto the envelope, smudging the writing. All the envelope said was 'Mac'. Mac turned the envelope over and stared at the back of it. Ever so slowly, with a shaking hand, Mac opened the envelope and pulled out the paper within.
The paper had been folded in thirds, with a lot of precision. Mac unfolded it and read the first line…and then the next...and then the next.
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Dearest Sarah,
The reason you are reading this is because I am no longer here, by your side. I wrote this letter so you may never forget my feelings for you...because I DO have feelings for you Sarah. Feelings that run deep.
Sarah Mackenzie…you are my angel and I love you with all my being. I have since…well, truth is, I'm not sure from when…but it I have for a very long time. Sarah, I want you to know, that I will love you forever…even from this side of the grave. It kills me to know that there may come the time where I won't be here anymore to be able to see that sweet smile of yours, those chocolate brown eyes which drive me wild. I must admit, it took me a while to realise that it was you I loved. That it wasn't some left over feelings from Diane. But I know its you I love, not Diane's ghost. I wish I was able to tell you this to your face, but everytime I try, I get this little voice inside my head telling me that it'd ruin our friendship. I hope I can stop listening to this voice and tell you, that way you will never have to read this letter.
Sarah, I want you to have one thing clear, I want you to move on. I want you to find someone who will love you as much as I do, who will care for you, who will be able to help fulfill your dream of being a mother. Sarah, I don't want you to dwell on 'what ifs'. I want you to live life, to do things you've always wanted to do, because you never know when the time will come for you to join me.
I better go now Sarah, I hear knocking on my door. I asked you 'round to keep working on the Stevens' case and for dinner, remember? And you're early…as always.
Remember this, I love you and though I'm not here right now…I'm up there and I'm going to guide you through thick and thin.
All my love,
Harm
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"Oh Harm," Mac whispered into the soft glow of the lamp. "I love you, too. More than you'll ever know."
She returned the letter to its envelope and turned off the light. She made her way to her bed in the darkness. Once she reached it, she placed the envelope underneath her pillow, laid down and let sleep take her back to the good times. When Harm was alive and all was right in the world.
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Happy Easter everybody:gives everyone easter eggs:
