Temptation and Salvation in the Desert

Warnings: AU, 3x4, yaoi, language, lime, some sap…and pretty much a little of everything else in case I missed something

By NostalgieMalaak


Morning caught the two lovers unawares. Sunlight spread through the sky like spilled oilpaint, shimmering and bright. The little valley that harbored the tent and campsite was lit up with the warm buttery light. The red-brown rocks of the cliffs warmed and seemed to pulse with a heat of their own. Inside the tent the two were bathed with muted light that filtered through the thin skinned walls.

Trowa awoke slowly, letting the luxurious heat soak all the way through him. This pleasant sensation was soon eclipsed with the even more pleasant feeling of Cat nuzzling his strong bicep and placing soft kisses on the heated skin.

"Good morning," Trowa yawned sleepily. The tousled head of his lover nudged against him in reply. Trowa was lying on his stomach, his head pillowed on his arms. Lazily he let his eyes slip shut again, enjoying the sensation of Cat's smooth body nestled against his side, the boy's head resting on his back.

Soon Trowa rolled onto his side and pulled his lover up so they could look into each others' eyes. Cat looked content. A little drunken smile flitted across his face and his eyes were unfocussed with sleepiness and warmth. Taking the smaller boy in his arms, Trowa held him tight and ran possessive hands up and down the other boy's body. Cat purred and arched into Trowa's strong chest, trying to avoid being tickled by Trowa's wandering hands and at the same time feel them stronger against him. Giggling a little, Trowa finally gave his lover some respite and was content to simply lie still.

Later that morning, when it had become too hot to stay in the tent and still keep the physical closeness they both enjoyed, they journeyed out into the oasis for a swim in the pond and lounge under the shady trees.

Trowa knew that this must be what paradise was.

"Cat?"

"Hmmm?" Cat murmured, sitting up to look at Trowa where he lay next to him on the blanket they had brought outside to sit on.

"Where are we, exactly?"

"Where?" the Berber asked, his eyes going skyward as he tried to remember what the word meant.

"Yes. Where? This place…" Trowa asked, sweeping his hands out, "Where is this place? Where are we?"

"Sahara." Cat said, nodding and smiling.

"Well, I know that! I meant, where in the Sahara are we?"

"Asad, you know where you are."

"No, I don't! You know I don't! Really Cat, where are we?"

"Here. Now. That is all," Cat shrugged, a sympathetic, and for a brief moment very old and wise look came into his eyes. "You are happy, yes?"

"Yes," Trowa replied with a frown

"Then you know."

"What? But I…"

"Come Asad! Be happy!"

With that Cat grabbed his hand a pulled him to his feet. They spent the rest of the day climbing the cliffs and making love and Trowa forgot all about his question until the next day.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Cat?"

"Yes?"

"Where are we?"

"I told you."

"No you didn't. At least, I don't think you did."

"You are here. You are with me."

"Then why am I with you?" He asked in frustration.

"You want to be happy. And I want you to be happy too."

"You're not going to give me a straight answer, are you?" Trowa asked dryly.

"What is 'straight'?"

"Never mind."

XXXXXXXXXXX

Many more days of being in the desert passed. Every day was wonderful, and restful, and filled with Cat's love…but Trowa was becoming increasingly more homesick and worried for his friends. Asking Cat about things never helped. The boy knew a lot more than he let on, but never told him. Trowa thought that it was probably just to protect him. There was nothing in Cat that suggested anything malicious. Not like the devil in the sand dunes. But from time to time Trowa's patience ran out and the questioning would start again.

"Cat."

"Yes Asad?"

"Where is your family?"

"Around."

"Around where?"

"Here. Everywhere."

"Do they worry about you?"

"Oh no! They know I am happy. They know you are happy too and so they are happy."

"…That's a little disturbing. Do they like that we're…um…together?"

"Yes. I told you. They are happy that you are happy. You are happy, yes?"

"Yes, very happy. I love you Cat."

"And I love you."

XXXXXXXXX

"Cat, where does all the food come from? We always have enough but you never leave to get more."

"It comes."

"From where?"

"Hmmm….I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"It comes. I'm sorry Trowa, but I don't know."

"That's alright. Guess I just have to keep a better eye out, huh?"

Cat just smiled.

XXXXXXXXX

"How old are you Cat?"

"Old?"

"Yes. I'm eighteen. How many years have you been alive?"

"I don't know."

"Well, if you could guess, how old would you be?"

"Old."

"Old? You don't look old."

"How old am I look, Asad?"

"How old do you look, you mean? You look like you're sixteen…maybe."

"I don't know what is this 'sixteen.' It is not old?"

"No. Younger than me."

"Oh…no…much more old than you."

"How can that be!"

Cat sighed and picked up Trowa's hand, trying to sooth him with gentle strokes to his palm.

"Asad, you are here. You are with me. You do not…must?...need?...know how 'old' I am. This…this place…all here…is for you. You are happy now. This is good. I think…not too long now…"

"What do you mean?" Trowa asked with concern. Cat looked so sad.

"Soon, you not be here with me. You go back to sister and be happy with her. Soon."

"But…I don't want to leave you! I love you-"

"And I love you-"

"And so you'll come with me! I want to go home to my sister and my friends, Cat. I want you to come home with me. They'll just love you! I know they will."

Cat just shook his head and with a sad smile began kissing his way down Trowa's arm.

XXXXXXXXXX

As the days went by Trowa became more and more restless, and more eager to return home. Cat seemed to sense this as well and was very quiet most of the time. Their lovemaking was sweet and tinged with a sadness that only grew as time went on.

Trowa had long since lost track of how long he had been lost. Time in this desert, wherever he was, was meaningless.

At last the day came that felt of such finality that Trowa knew it must be the end. Never in his short life had he been so distraught. He wished more than anything to return to his family. Deep in his heart he knew that that was where he was needed. And he also knew that Cat would not come with him.

That night in their tent the two lovers sat side by side for a long time neither speaking nor touching. Both were unnecessary. Trowa felt Cat in him as if they were the same person. Nothing could be uttered that hadn't already been spoken, or thought between the two.

As the night went on Cat began to cry and Trowa held him in his lap, running a soothing hand through bright hair.

Then he laid the boy down and slid under the blankets beside him to sleep. In the moonlight that shone through the opening in the tent Cat looked just as beautiful and mysterious as he had the first night Trowa had laid eyes on him. After long minutes of trying to commit his lover to his memory, Trowa's eyes began to burn and they slipped shut.

For many years afterward Trowa would argue with himself if what he heard and saw in the early morning was real or not. He finally concluded that even if it was a dream, it was the most wonderful dream a person could ever experience.

Cat had been kneeling over him, lightly petting his hair. His unusual robin's egg blue skin had looked so soft and his eyes, the color of the Mediterranean, had glowed with their own inner power. Bending close to Trowa so that his sweet breath stirred the fine hairs next to his ear, he had whispered, "Trowa, I will always love you. And I will always be with you. Be happy with your life, because you are too beautiful a person not to have happiness."

And in the next instant, just as a bit of light touched the tent, he was gone. Imprinted on Trowa's mind was the image of Cat just as the light touched him, wings the color of the sand burning with the gold of the desert sun stretching behind him to the horizons.