Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its inherent information. It belongs to the one and only J.K. Rowling!

Chapter Three: Precis- a concise summary of essential points, statements, or facts

James awoke to the light of the sun shining through the little cracks in between the floorboards that covered up the windows of the Shrieking Shack. He looked around and saw remnants of the fun from the day before.

Most of the things were transfigured or conjured, so most of the shack returned to normal.

He looked around and saw a hilarious sight. Remus, Sirius, and Padfoot were still fully asleep and Remus was the only one who was in his human form.

Sirius was being used as a pillow, as Remus slightly was hugging him and Wormtail was trapped between the slobbering mouth of padfoot.

James fixed the shack up quickly with his magic before deciding the best way to wake his friends up. James transfigured Sirius into an enlarged stuffed werewolf, which still had its jaws around Peter.

Then, he transfigured Peter into a stuffed rat, similar to his own form.

Then he woke Remus with a gentle shake, as he said, "Aww, Remus you look so unbelievably manly hugging a stuffed animal of your own creation. Wait, look at that, there are two stuffed animals!"

Remus looked at James as if James was growing a second head. Was James crazy? Remus noticed that indeed he was hugging a werewolf as if his life depended on it.

He also noticed the rat inside its teeth. Remus had not figured out yet that Sirius was the werewolf, but knew that the rat was Wormtail. Remus reached for the rat with his right hand while holding onto the werewolf with his left arm.

As he was separating the two, James had chosen a couple of restoring spells, which left Remus grabbing a hold of two sleeping wizards.

As Remus dropped to the ground, Sirius and Wormtail woke up with a start and started screaming and running around like girls.

James stood laughing, while he pointed at Remus who was rolling on the floor trying not to be stepped on. Soon enough, Sirius and Peter were calm enough to actually look around to see what had actually happened.

Amidst all of the confusion they saw James in the corner laughing his head off.

"Oh, James, you'll pay for that!" yelled Moony.

"Oh no! I have a big bad werewolf after me! Someone save me!" said James, dramatically putting his hand to his forehead.

"Psst, hey Peter. Do you think James might be hiding something? He's acting more and more like a girl," whispered Sirius.

"Who knows, Sirius, if that's the case though, it would be interesting to see Lily and him, err maybe her together," whispered back Peter.

"EWWWW! There's absolutely nothing wrong with me, you guys! Take a joke! And, I have amazing hearing, so stop whispering. Ack! Guys, we better hurry and head back or else people will notice that we're missing," exclaimed James.

As the Marauders snuck back into the castle, James suddenly remembered that he had forgotten something, but he didn't know exactly what he had forgotten about.

Deciding that it was probably something inconsequential, he headed back with the Marauders.

The Marauders crept into the dormitory and after finding nobody there they went upstairs to get ready for classes. James was the first one out and started to head out the door all of a sudden…

"POTTER! YOU IDIOTIC ARROGANT BIGHEADED INCONSIDERATE FORGETFUL IRRESPONSIBLE TROUBLEMAKING IGNORANT CARELESS IRRITATING RECKLESS STUBBORN INCORRIGIBLE" Lily starts then must take a breath to continue, "DISRESPECTFUL SMARMY INFURITATING LYING PRAT JERK PONCE GIT OF A MARAUDER!"

James just stood there and responded with an incomprehensive "ggkk" as he stood shocked at the entourage of verbal detriments. He finally asked of Lily, "What did I do?"

Lily let out a cry of frustration and started yelling, "POTTER!

WE HAD A HEADS MEETING YESTERDAY WITH ALL OF THE STAFF AT HOGWARTS!

WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GIVE OUR SPEECH ON THE WELL BEING OF THE STUDENT BODY!

YOU SAID YOU HAD IT PREPARED FOR BOTH OF US! I HAD TO MAKE UP ALMOST EVERYTHING! YOU WEREN'T EVEN THERE!

NONE OF YOUR FRIENDS WERE HERE EITHER! I LOOKED FOR YOU FOR OVER 2 HOURS! WHERE IN THE NAME OF MERLIN WERE YOU!

I SHOULD TAKE ALL OF GRYFFINDOR'S POINTS, A DETENTION EVERY DAY UNTIL YOU GRADUATE AND A BAN ON QUIDDITCH!"

"Oops, that was yesterday?" asked James. "Well I have a very good reason for why I couldn't have made it. And Lily, I mean Evans, do you always have to be so harsh in reprimanding me?

I mean I know I missed it and I know I shouldn't have. If you really want to you can do all those things that you said. I know I should be more responsible. I'll go talk to the headmaster and Professor McGonagall at once."

Lily was catching her breath after all the shouting and barely heard what James was saying. She couldn't comprehend what James was talking about.

She expected James to yell back at her, prank her, do something, not give in; he even accepted a ban on quidditch. QUIDDITCH! It's unheard of! He's even going to talk to the professors right now instead of eating his almost holy breakfast!

Wait, he said he had a reason. As James was heading out, Lily yelled, "Wait! Potter! You can go explain later, but you said you had a good reason. What was it?"

James cursed himself for giving Lily the chance to find out about Remus. He replied with, "It's a good reason, but I can't tell you. It's not my place to tell. You will have to ask Remus when you see him." Then James left without giving Lily a chance to reply.

Lily fumed with anger at his obvious dismissal of her request. She really considered enacting all of the point taking, the detentions, and the ban, but decided to ask Remus for why James missed it.

James hadn't done anything really against the rules since the term started. Lily also figured that Professor Dumbledore and McGonagall would deal with all of the disciplinary actions. Lily quickly went to go find Remus.

Remus was on his way to breakfast, hoping to find an easygoing affair since the hectic morning wake-up call. As he set down, he was suddenly attacked by something in red. Remus noticed that it was Lily who was in her Gryffindor robes, flashing eyes, and blazing red hair.

"Hey Lily, what prompted you to attack a poor innocent young man like me just for picking up his fork to start breakfast," said Remus.

"Sorry, Remus," said Lily, sheepishly, but she continued her tale of how James had missed a very very very important meeting with the Heads. It was an evaluation of their effectiveness, which might as well mean that if they had done poorly their positions were at stake. In reality, it wasn't anything but a checkup, but Lily of course did not know that.

Remus didn't think it was that big of a deal as Lily left out any insulting words except to say "that annoying Potter," and thought that this would be the perfect example of getting back at James for this morning.

"Well Lily, you see James has this problem. We were playing around, harmless really in the dorm after dinner. However, Sirius cast a spell as we were mock dueling, except that he messed up the incantation.

It wasn't a very well known spell and it ricocheted off of a mirror and mixed with my reducio spell. I think it hit James in the wrong place because a vital part of his body started shrinking uncontrollably.

It was all a bunch of laughs and fun for the rest of us and for some weird reason, James was having a lot of fun too. James helped me out with my depression that I was in by making me laugh, although it was on accident.

So I don't think you should give James that hard of a time. He wouldn't have performed well at all because he was helping me all along yesterday. In his "predicament" he was happy, but he changed.

If you ask him about it, he wasn't himself yesterday, he was more like an animal. I guess that's what happens when he's under a very complex spell. I guess you can hint that you know my secret of sometimes being depressed and his secret of his change."

"Wow, poor Potter!" said Lily.

James went straight from being yelled at by Lily to the Headmaster's office to rectify the current situation. Even before he started guessing at the password, the gargoyle moved aside and let him through, not noticing that the Headmaster was walking behind him.

As soon as he greeted Fawkes, he noticed that Dumbledore was standing behind him with eyes twinkling merrily.

"Why, good morning Mr. Potter. Why aren't you in the Great Hall for breakfast? I'm surprised to see you here, as I forgot my lemon drops, what a coincidence on meeting you here too! Would you like one?" said Dumbledore as he brought out a bag.

"No thank you, professor. I wanted to discuss the meeting that I missed last night because as you know, it was very important. I would like to first apologize for my irresponsibility, but I do have a good reason even if I can't explicitly tell you." said James as he lowered his head.

If James had been watching, he would have seen Dumbledore's eyes twinkle faster as it seemed that Dumbledore knew what James had done for his friend Remus.

"Well, James, I'm sure you know how important the meeting was and originally, I was thinking of suspending both yours and Miss Evan's positions as Head Boy and Head Girl.

What do you suppose should be your punishment, now that I am up for reconsideration?" asked Dumbledore.

"First, I would like to absolve all blame from Lily because it was never her fault. I owed her a favor and put it upon myself to deliver the updates on the school. I'll show it and summon them to you right now. Accio reports!" yelled James.

In a matter of seconds, James's notebook came flying up through the just opened door. However, as the notebook came flying, pieces of parchment flew out.

James noticed that besides the parchments dealing with the report, scraps of parchment with his daydreaming doodling were amongst the flying documents. He hastily tried to catch the incriminating evidence while in the air while Dumbledore looked on smiling.

Dumbledore managed to grab one that was stuck in his beard and took a look.

Raising his eyebrows he asked, "Why Mr. Potter, are you sure that Miss Evans agrees with your diagnosis to have a dozen children all with these names? Hmm, it seems you've even made a schedule to begin making this magic happen."

Suddenly James cast an incendio and burned the parchment from Dumbledore's hands. Blushing, he handed over the actual report to Dumbledore. Then he began to speak again.

"ahem, Professor, in addition to my apology for that ummm discrepancy, if Lily would not be suspended from Head Girl duties, I am willing to make up for it. I myself will be suspended as Head Boy, losing its privileges; however, I will still have its duties.

For this, I will remain under these conditions for two weeks. If this is not enough, please tell me anything else that I can do. My only concern is to free Lily of any responsibility because it was not her fault," said James.

"It seems like we have a deal, although Mr. Potter, I'm not sure what kind of favor Miss Evans owed you, but I sure hope she will find out your act of kindness," said Dumbledore dismissing James from the room.

As James left the room, he found himself accosted by Lily again. He wondered about how his luck would sometimes be so fortunate to be in the presence of one who he liked, but then he looked at the downside of things.

He wouldn't be free for another two weeks because of the incident at the Shrieking Shack. He wouldn't even be able to see Lily as often as he lost the privilege of sharing a dorm with the Head Girl.

Although, half the times he would sleep in the boys' dormitory anyways, he wouldn't even be allowed in. Suddenly he remembered that Lily was talking to him.

"I'm sorry about yelling at you earlier today, Potter," started Lily. "Remus told me everything about how you were helping Remus out yesterday. He also told me to keep it a secret of how you had changed yesterday to become more in touch with your inner animal."

James was stunned. Remus couldn't just break the Marauders code of conduct by telling people about Animagi and Remus being a werewolf.

Even though James was considering telling Lily anyways because she was his beloved, these things weren't rushed into.

James seemed confused, which happened quite frequently lately, and finally managed to ask, "So you won't send me to Azkaban right? And so what do you think of Remus anyways?"

Lily had a bewildered look after the mention of Azkaban and could only reply, "Azkaban? You mean the spell that you used is illegal? POTTER! How could you! Even to help out Remus you shouldn't tamper with illegal things!"

James could only be enraged further, "I think that helping out a friend is worth going to Azkaban! How can you be so heartless Lily to not help Remus in his condition?"

Lily was also quick to anger as she responded with, "Remus can take care of himself in these cases! You shouldn't risk expulsion for these things. You're reckless enough in missing that meeting. Most likely we'll be expelled or suspended anyways! THANKS A LOT POTTER!"

Lily began to walk away.

James yelled after her, "EVANS! Since when did you care so much about the well-being of us Marauders and me especially! And of course your precious position is still intact! Go ask the headmaster if you want to talk about being responsible!"

In a softer manner, James looked sadly again at Lily's retreating form. He said softly, "I hope she really doesn't go talk to the headmaster. I can't believe I made up a stupid excuse about owing her a favor.

I know she's quite busy with everything so I try to help her out with these duties. I'm not sure she knows that I'm risking expulsion while she's getting off scot-free. Enjoy, not seeing me in the dorms, my precious Lily Evans."

James decided to go on with the day out of sorts and spent the week somewhat distant from his friends. One of his favorite spots to find solitude would be next to the Lake where he would dream of fond memories of the past.

Peter found James sitting outside next to the lake as it was after lunch and on a weekend and James was so atypically by himself.

"Hey Prongs, why are you out here by yourself?" asked Peter.

"Well, I was just thinking about my feelings for Lily and how trivial it might seem" replied James.

"I know I haven't much experience with girls because I'm not as popular as you, but I hope I can help you," said Peter, glancing nervously at James.

"Thanks Wormtail, I know you feel as if you don't match up to Sirius, Remus, or me, but understand that all people are different. Your chance will come soon enough. I'll always believe in you Peter to make all of the Marauders proud!" said James smiling at Peter.

"So, what do you exactly feel about Lily, if you don't mind me asking, I might take some notes so I'll have the great James Potter's advice," stated Peter as he transfigured a piece of parchment and quill laughing at the look of horror on James's face.

"Wormtail! I'm not that arrogant! Stop making me seem like such a bad person! Well, how do I feel about Lily? I love her of course!" exclaimed James as he nodded his head fervently as if he was mentally agreeing with himself.

"Why do you love her, Prongs? I'm sure she feels flattered and all, but maybe she's wondering why her?" asked Peter as he didn't quite understand what love was so he was hoping to find out a semi-clear definition.

"Wormtail! I've known you for six years and you still don't realize that I think she's perfect! Why else would I love anybody else, you know how I think of her!" said James exasperated as he almost turned away from his friend.

"I talked to her once, prongs. She herself said that she wasn't perfect. Wouldn't she know herself best?" asked Peter hoping not to get his friend extremely mad.

"Good ol' Wormtail! Thanks for talking with her for me. I know you're kind of inexperienced about this so let me try to explain something. What's the meaning of love? Is there a set definition? Is it seeing people as they really are?

If one does that then it doesn't make them special. It's how everyone would treat each other, as they really are and that's not what love is. Love is more than that because it's not just what a person is, it's more than that.

Love is when you can see people as they really are and treat them better than that. Understand?" explained James.

"Wow prongs! You're a poet and you didn't even know it! Sorry, prongs for the lame joke, but if you love someone for something other than what they really are, do you really love them? or are you in love with someone better than them?" replied Wormtail thoughtfully.

"Wow Wormtail, you better be taking awesome notes! Let's see, it's like I said, you see people as they really are, truly love them for it, and therefore because you love them and care for them so much, you have to treat them better or else what's the difference from a friend and a lover? Or an enemy and a lover?

If all of these people are treated as they are? If you can answer that Wormtail, I'll keep giving you answers as I think about it some more" stated James looking off into the distant trying to get a grasp on his feelings.

"I might be kind of getting argumentative here, but I really want to know, so I'm thanking you right now prongs that you are helping me a lot.

If someone loved you, would you want them to treat you as something you are not like Lily does, or would you want them to be truthful about how you really are like you want her to be?

Would you want to always wonder who Lily is really seeing when she looks at you?

Would you want to wonder if they see something and treat you better because of it?

Wouldn't that be prejudice?" asked Wormtail as he furiously kept writing on his parchment.

"Wormtail, you are not being argumentative at all! I want you to succeed in life so I'm glad I can help you in this way because I don't think I will always be there for you.

Anyways, that is one point of looking at it, but just so you know Peter, all of this that I am saying only applies to Lily. So there is no one better and if there was someone better it'd be Lily herself again. If it was really prejudice and seeing other people differently then that yes is truly wrong.

But right now it's not possible to see people as better than anybody else, for people are good and bad at different things, there is no ultimate perfect person, but to be able to treat someone like that, and still yes love them for who they are... and to STILL help them even though the perception is of perfection, then that is truly genuine love." rambled James, hoping that what he said in his mind could be considered coherent.

"James, there you are being that romantic again. I have no argument
for what you said, and it was a delightful conversation being very insightful on the intricacies of the human emotion.

I'm sure whomever is loved by you is truly blessed to be loved by such a compassionate and caring person." replied Wormtail, hoping that James caught his drift.

"Wormtail! I've said over and over, I love Lily, not this whomever person that you're talking about!" said James exasperatedly.

"Sorry, Prongs, my mind just slipped there. Lily would truly be blessed, but do you think this will turn out for the best. I don't think you'll always love Lily because she can't even look at you at this point." said Peter, as the sky darkened showing the extent of time of the serious conversation.

"And, Wormtail, my dear deluded friend, how in the name of Merlin would you know that?" asked James.

"Well see that's what I was saying. You won't always love her so whomever is the better term to use. Whomever you love will be blessed." replied Peter quickly.

"Wormtail, this is the basic gist of the extent of my feelings. If I don't always love Lily, then I should become a muggle hermit and die on a deserted island grieving about my decision of not loving Lily." answered James with a serious expression on his face.

Perplexed, Peter asked, "But if you don't love Lily, then why would you grieve for something you don't do?"

With a twinkle in his eye, James answered, "because I would always love Lily no matter what. Giving it up or mistakenly 'saying that I didn't' or anything similar would hurt very much to cause me to grieve."

Peter finally sighed and replied, "Ah, Prongs. You got me then! I think that's enough for me! Do you have anything else to add for my notes?"

James looked thoughtful for a while and then turned to face Peter," Certain things I will never forget and will never leave my mind or heart. These things include the great topic of love and Lily.

If things don't work out between Lily and me, I want to let you know that everything I've said is still true. I will always love her because she has made me myself. Through what she has shown or what I've shown because of her I'm showing the best I can be.

Other than love and Lily, friends are also things that will never leave me. Even if you don't think much of yourself Peter, you will always have a place in my heart too.

It may seem as if my friends are so insignificant in comparison to love, but it's just all the same. Wormtail, I mean Peter, because somethings are too serious for nicknames.

No matter what, it is the choices that you make and sometimes just what you believe in before you die that makes you who you are not what you have done in the past or what you will do in the future.

I'm not sure that I will be there for you, so try to remember this. Also, I hope you find a girl to use your awesome notes on.

Lily, my love, I hope that someday you may find a time to fully understand and appreciate my feelings for you because it feels so pure, so sweet. Pure sweetness as those Americans would say." finished James.

James felt that somewhat relieved now that he was done discussing his feelings with Peter. It helped to solidify his emotions once he organized them. Maybe he would borrow Wormtail's notes in the future if he was ever hung up on anything.

James walked into the castle, a bit more at peace with himself. His day was filled with some tranquil magic that could not be broken until James woke up the next day.

On the next day, James was riding the wave of serenity from the day before; therefore, James decided to check up on his friends in the common room.

As James entered the portrait after whispering lady of the lake, he was suddenly jumped upon as his best friend seemed to be waiting for him.

"Hey Prongs, did you hear about the Ministry apprentice-ships? They're only going to give it out to around 7 students in all of Hogwarts!" asked a Sirius as the Marauders hovered next to the Gryffindor notice board.

"Yeah, I'm going to see if I can be an Auror or an Unspeakable, but the interviews are on the same day as our Gryffindor vs. Slytherin Quidditch game. Do you think there will be scouts there watching us?" James replied.

"Well, this whole week is considered "career" week, where the 7th years have the opportunity to respond to the "outreach" program that the Ministry as well as several Wizarding businesses out there promote" said Remus matter-of-factly.

"Come on Moony! Lighten up! I hope I can get something that has to do with Honeydukes or Quality Quidditch Supplies. What a dream job! Food and Candy all around or quidditch!" said an excited Peter.

"Sure, wormtail! That sounds like a surefire plan. I just hope that all the Gryffindor's make it because I'd sure hate to go to month long sessions with Snivellus..." responded Sirius dryly.

"Hey you guys want to go practice some Quidditch?" asked James.

"YEAH!" replied all the Marauders.

Soon enough, the Marauders were carrying their own broomsticks, partially bought by Sirius and James as they chipped in for collaborative presents, but immensely appreciated still.

As they reached the doors that faced the pitch they ran across a sticky situation in the hallway.

It was interesting enough that on a beautiful weekend that there would be certain students indoors, yet from what the Marauders could see, there were about 20 students collectively in this hallway.

On one side of the hallway, which most likely led somewhere to the Slytherin Common Room, stood at least 10 Slytherins differing from year 4 to year 7, although a majority were 7th years.

On the other side of the hallway stood several students from the other houses, one of which was the Head Girl, Lily Evans.

Now, usually, Hogwarts was a peaceful place, not counting the pranks and other Marauder-like activities, but there were hardly any blown out fights.

However, the Marauders, having not been noticed yet, realized that the odds were not in the Head Girl's favor. James was one of the most alert out of the group as he could tell that Lily would not come out unscathed.

He heard her distinctly voicing that the Slytherins should head back to their common room or else disperse or else she was going to take off points.

James sighed as he realized that Lily would always be a stickler to the rules no matter what kind of situation it was. Mutterings of Mudblood and other harsh detriments could be heard as one 7th year Slytherin firmly said "Why don't you try to make us."

From what the Marauders could tell, there was a study session of the lower years walking around the school, which consisted of muggleborns from different houses that banded together to acquaint themselves better at Hogwarts.

However, being ambushed by at least 10 students of a higher level was fairly menacing. Lily Evans would have the luck, or rather misfortune of stepping in.

Now instead of the Slytherins pranking or pulling a few trick's could now pick on someone their own size, say the Head Girl. As a prominent muggle-born witch, the trigger happy, or wand-happy Slytherins who were soon-to-be Death Eaters would love to have a chance at Lily.

At this point the Marauders looked at each other and decided to intervene. They all chose carefully as all four of them shot stunners at the Slytherins who were about to begin cursing.

After four of the Slytherins who started cursing were frozen, they looked towards the Marauders for the disturbance. Now it was more even as it was Lily and the Marauders versus around the same number of Slytherins.

James using his Head Boy authority ushered the younger students from other houses away while taking points from Slytherin. Now, Lily who stood by shocked broke out of her dazed look and reprimanded James severely for lack of constraint.

She didn't realize that these Slytherins who already worshipped Voldemort could not be "changed" and were not merely "misunderstood" students. They had a passion for torture, death, and destruction, which the Marauders knew quite well.

As Lily was facing away from the Slytherins, she could not see that the Slytherins had revived their fallen comrades. In a quick flash, the Slytherins began an attack on the Marauders and Lily.

James quickly pushed Lily away, receiving a cutting curse in his arm, as he shot a volley of 3 or 4 spells in 2 seconds, an auror technique, towards the Slytherins.

Meanwhile, Remus who was versed in counter-curses and counter jinxes went on the defensive while Wormtail kept shields popping up in random places to confuse the targets.

Sirius on the other hand went in wand a-blazing casting furiously to help his best friend. Although the Marauders were very very good, they had to deal with being outnumbered as well as those who were recruits of the Dark Lord who had to be good fighters.

Peter and Remus were dealing with two 6th years and a 7th year while Sirius was dealing with a 7th year and a 6th year by himself. James and Lily had been surrounded by the rest of the Slytherins.

James used an extremely powerful banishing charm as suits of armor crashed into the nearby Slytherins. However, as a side effect, Lily was also in the way of the falling debris.

Two certain very dark Slytherins had cast Crucio followed by a wingardium leviosa to cancel any priori incantatem. James jumped in front of Lily so that she would not have to deal with the Crucio, while her body was partially crushed.

James could not save himself from all harm as he was still under the Crucio's. Sirius on the other hand was using a reckless offensive that seemed to work as he shot incendios, confundus's, and stupefy's breaking the barriers of the Slytherins and tying them to the roof of the castle.

Peter and Remus had transfigured a nearby book bag into a dog reminiscent of padfoot that attacked the Slytherins. As they were 6th years, they had not learned the counter to that particular spell and were quickly disarmed.

All the Slytherins were now incapacitated as James had worked out a Stupefy, an amazing piece of magic as he was still under two Crucios. After falling unconscious, the rest of the Marauders ran to get the professors.

The Ministry involvement which was to be the next week would be put on a temporary status because so many of the students were ineligible. The Slytherins were put on probation and a month of detentions, but after a week, they could go to the Ministry interviews.

On the other hand, James and Lily were still recovering from their injuries. Almost a week had past, when James woke up in time for the quidditch game and the interviews.

However, Lily was still unconscious because of her injuries and some of the traps the Slytherins had put on the area around the fight.

No one knew why it took so long for James and Lily to recover, but Dumbledore had found that a Dark Arts spell was put on the area as if the fight was preordained.

The spell would drain the magic from a person up to a weak, disabling any way for magical means of healing. James woke up and found that Lily was still out and he believed that it was because of his reckless spell that she was still injured.

It was on the night before possibly the biggest day of the year that James stayed up to think.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

What should I do? I can't leave Lily here all by herself! I realize that Madame Pomfrey's care is world renown, but I feel as if it is my entire fault. Why is it that I always end up hurting the one that I love?

Is it something simple like what my dad told me? He told me about a common perception that people undergo when they look for something they've lost. It turns up the last place that you look.

The reason behind this is because after you find it, you stop looking, so you feel that way. Lily is what I live for. Does it matter whether or not I stay? Even after all of this, the majority of society, including Lily will act in the same manner.

No one sees beyond the initial reaction. It seems useless to everyone that there's no point for me to wait? Tomorrow is something so important to the future that I should be able to decide to go to the interviews.

In comparison, the fact that even though what happens tomorrow could be life changing, being with Lily is life changing enough. I still have doubts? I guess I've made my decision.

While Lily is still bed-ridden I might as well put my life on hold. What I can do to aid in this situation is to make sure that when she wakes up, she has an easy time getting into the swing of things.

What I do willingly for love, my friends will probably think I'm mad to give up my future career and my fun of quidditch. To me, though, if she wakes up and is happy, then it's well worth it...

James soon fell asleep on the chair next to Lily's bed and when Madame Pomfrey came to check upon Lily, she gave a sad smile.

She herself could feel the pure emotion coming from Mr. Potter that seemed to give her a calming sensation. Something this powerful would be sure to help Miss Evans. How lucky Miss Evans is.

As James woke up, he found himself face to face with the headmaster who was also situated on one side of Lily's bed.

"Why good morning James," said the professor.

"Good morning, professor, Why are you here this morning?" asked James, inquisitively.

"Well, I was just checking upon our Head Boy and Girl because today is a big day to represent Hogwarts. The Ministry's liaisons have postponed as long as they can in light of the situation. I am sorry about Miss Evans's condition," said Dumbledore.

"What's going to happen then to Lily's opportunities?" asked James.

"Well, it would seem that if Miss Evans were not to awaken by midday, then her current chance would be lessened. Do not fear, for Miss Evans is quite the capable student, and I have faith in that she will awaken or still find a suitable job," said Dumbledore. "Well, you should probably get ready Mr. Potter for the coming hours."

"Sorry, professor, but I don't believe I can partake in this opportunity without my better half. It wouldn't be proper to represent Hogwarts incomplete," said James firmly.

"Mr. Potter, I'm not quite sure what you're saying. Are you trying to boycott these interviews or something else? The Ministry will give no second chances in this case," said Dumbledore.

"My intentions are true, professor, and I do understand the consequences," said James as he turned away from the Professor to gaze upon Lily again.

Dumbledore looked with admiring eyes as he looked upon his two best students. He thought to himself "This is what the next generation will be like."

Dumbledore as well as James within themselves hoped that Miss Evans would awaken as soon as possible.

James because he didn't fall asleep until late soon drifted again in hopes of forgetting the irrevocable decision that he made.

In his dreams he could hear a faint whisper of his name, which sounded like it came from his beloved Lily. It grew louder and louder until James woke up.

James found Lily awake with her eyes squinting as she tried to adjust to the light in the hospital wing.

"Lily! You're awake! How are you feeling? We have to hurry! The interviews are almost over! Madame POMFREY" exclaimed James.

"Potter? Is that you? How long have I been out? What happened to the Slytherins? What do you mean interviews? Will you stop shouting?" asked Lily, a bit dazed.

In the quickest explanation of the century, James recounted the events of the past week, so Lily would know what was going on today.

Lily soon forgot about checking with Madame Pomfrey, as she told James. "The interviews are today? Today! I have to get ready! Bye Potter!"

James stood stunned. Lily Evans went flying through the doors towards her room. James sat there thinking: Not even a thank you? She is stressed, but is this all I'm supposed to be? I guess I should forget about it now. I can go to the interviews now…

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The next day

Hmm, let's see what's on the menu for today. I think today consists of Kathryn, Rachel, and Isabella. Or was it Katie and not Kathryn? Wait, wasn't Katie last monday? I think I need to check my black book so I don't forget.

Ah! Kathryn was last Monday and Katie was last Tuesday. Wow, I was totally off, today begins with Brittany. Okay, so I have their names memorized... Kathryn, Rachel, and Isabella. Argh! Brittany, maybe Kathryn left too much of a good impression.

Now, how do I recognize them? Hmm what does my book say, Brittany: Tall, Hufflepuff, Redhead, blue eyes, 9 out of 10. Rachel: Semi-Tall, Hufflepuff, Blonde, gray eyes, 8 out of 10.

Isabella: Average, Ravenclaw, Dark-haired, darkskinned, gold eyes, 9 and a half out of 10. Man! Today must be my lucky day! I don't think I've ever had a 10 and today I have a 9 and a 9 and a half! Oh this is wonderful!

From what most people expected, this is what a conversation Sirius Black would wake up to as he went over his schedule for the day. He would be seen mumbling to himself about the names of girls and sooner or later he would be seen with a girl.

Yet, what really was happening in the mind of Sirius Black was something totally different. People thought of him as well as his best friend James Potter as popular, arrogant, and almost playboys of the school.

For James, it had receded as he became Head Boy and Quidditch captain, but for Sirius, it was as if sticking to stereotypes was what he was all about. However, Sirius had made his own vow to be the exact opposite, atypical to the norm.

His whole family was basically in Slytherin and he had argued with the Sorting Hat to put him in Gryffindor. He was brought up to hate muggleborn and to only associate with purebloods, yet he was a friend with a werewolf.

At school however, Sirius hoped to be rid of these stereotypes. Sirius was born into a rich pureblooded family, but one of the features that he could not escape was his exceptionally attractive looks.

At school he was the most desired male, but only for looks. Anything else such as intelligence, friends, was more limited to his small group of friends the Marauders.

Sirius didn't even like doing what he did with all the girls. Sure, he appreciated how good-looking they were, but he also knew that they were human beings and to do something as play with their feelings or to just take advantage of them for pleasure was wrong. What Sirius was really mumbling about was this...

Sirius! Why are you doing this to yourself! That's the 4th broken heart this week and that's the 6th shirt you had to throw away because of all the tears. Don't you realize how much your life is being affected by this?

Well, my grades aren't going down, I'm having fun, and for me, it is such a stress reliever. Now that I've grown up and stopped hexing Snivellus for no reason, I still have alot of pent up tension.

Kathryn from last monday, Katie from last tuesday, Brittany, Rachel, and Isabella from today aren't being used for pleasure like most people think.

Yes, I love how they look because I am a red-blooded male, but to just be free of all expectations and to live life is the relief that I feel.

I no longer have any obligations because all we do is meaningless ministrations that relieve my tension. I try not to do it because it's not fair to me to take the easy way out.

I admire Prongs so much because it doesn't seem like he ever has a stress reliever, yet what I truly see is that all his stress is changed into love for Lily. No matter what goes wrong, he tries to find a way to make it better for himself or for Lily thus making him happy again.

I guess I want to establish something for myself on the basis of what I do with girls. I think if I had to name the best artist in the world or maybe the most illustrious work of art, I'd either have to thank God, if there was one, or say the female body because it is just so perfect.

I'd like to think that what I feel for alot of these girls is not lust, which to me is a debased form of appreciation or love. My attraction spawns from love in my own manner.

James has this type of love, but his platonic love is greater than mine. I would like to think that there's a line dividing the love that is on the inside and the love that is on the outside.

This love, that I engage in, is so deep and complicated that it's hard to pull off. How can lust be love, in a general term. Passion, which I have in abundance, shows my effort, not only to help myself, but to please the girl.

If I'm taking advantage of her as people might say, I have to make it enjoyable for her. I feel like I have to make it up somehow. It feels so wrong. I try so hard to make it moral, by warning the girls or by not impugning their virtue, but it still seems wrong.

The act in itself is careless, gluttony, a waste of the time I could be doing to make the world better. I don't know when it started, but it was around 2 years ago.

The longest I've gone without a girl was most likely the winter holidays when James's Parents took us to a remote island as a vacation. No girls, so no opportunity to let my other side shine through.

I understand that in the future, I'll hopefully grow out of it. Also, I know that almost all guys have already done something similar, although not with so many girls. It should be okay if everyone does it, but I still don't think it's right.

If I have a firm conviction that it is wrong, then why am I still doing it. I think I'm fooling myself when I said I don't do it for the pleasure. It is very enticing because it relieves all the tension that I have.

I also kind of think it motivates me because after this is over, it seems I have to make up for my immoral acts. A combined stress reliever, motivation, pleasurable event, why am I so resigned against the fact that I do it or like doing it?

Because it is wrong. A Black is supposed to know no wrong because everything they do is right because they are pureblooded. I'm not about to give into another stereotype of a Black doing whatever he wants when he wants and how he wants it.

I don't want to turn into a stereotypical jerk who uses and abuses girls around him. I want to love and be loved in return, but why can't I stop myself from this bad habit.

I mean, if I believe in love just as much as Prongs, James, then can't I use that motivation to stop my habits? It's just so difficult for me to understand why I don't do it or why I do it.

Is it anything truly wrong, no, but to me, personally, I guess it's just a personal preference, but I really think that all of this will someday come back and bite me.

I believe in retribution, not because I feel that I'm a bad person, but that justice will prevail to those who are bad people. So if they are able to be dealt justice, then I know I'm certainly not exempt from this.

I guess that's why I'm resigned while the temptation is so great. Maybe if I just settle down. My goal then I guess, is to try to go as long as possible without doing this habit. I can still enjoy the eye candy right?

Oh no! I'm going to be late to Defense Against the Dark Arts! I hate going to Madame Pomfrey just because I can't fix a stupid prank that contains some spell out of my level.

I really enjoy pranks, but I'm not sure I like it when such pranks are used on me. I guess that makes me a hypocrite, but if it's the truth then it's the truth. I guess that's all I can be at best, a realist.

I'm above average in work ethic, but that only makes up for the fact that I have a little under average magic ability. Mastering the animagus process helped boost my life a whole lot.

My magical ability increased, my focus, as well as my confidence received a valuable boost from being able to master an animagus form. I don't think I can ever thank Moony, Padfoot, and Prongs enough for that.

They're always there for me and I appreciate that so much. I remember having a conversation with Prongs a while back when I was asking him about love.

He said that I can do anything I wanted to because James wasn't aalways going to be there. I'm not quite sure what he meant, but I truly hope it turns out that I can do whatever I want in the future.

It's so confusing, I'm a realist, yet am I allowed to dream of the future? Dreams, Dreams, are just dreams if they're in your head.

Oh, I guess I'm allowed to dream of one thing right? Everyone does it? Love, the most beautiful thing in the entire universe? Out of all the magic in the world, love is the most powerful.

I guess that's what defines me a bit because I know I'm just an average guy, average looks, average ability, yet I dream so much, dream so far. Will I ever be anything?

I hope I never, ever, have all the dreams wrong. I hope that whatever I dream of can come true. I'm not sure if that can happen. I like this girl, she's a Slytherin, so opposite of me, but I think I'd do anything to be with her.

James implied something that I'm not sure I got. He said that a girl you love was on the same level as friends, but if you had to choose, which would you choose?

Is that what he meant that I could do anything I wanted and why he said he wasn't always going to be there? Is he telling me that I can be free of all influences even those of my friends.

I hope that they won't leave me. I also heard that love's counterpart is hate. I've read books and they say that some hate is almost as powerful as love. I'm not sure, which would win though.

I mean, 2nd place is only 1st loser. What's to be expected of me... I guess all I can do is observe. The eye candy for the soul, finding meaning, living vicariously, watching how life interacts so your own life is more meaningful.

I can't believe Peter asked me to tell him what eye candy meant! I mean, yes I'm smart, yes I know what the word means, but it applies more to Padfoot or Prongs.

Yes, I enjoy the occasional good-looking girl, and I guess that being a person who wouldn't normally look or wouldn't normally admire or appreciate gives me a reason to talk about it so flippantly.

Being smart doesn't automatically make you a nerd, it doesn't automatically put you at the bottom of the social ladder. Look at James, the most popular boy in school, as well as Head Boy.

I guess it's just discrimination. Nothing against my friends, but all I see in the world is how this person is perceived as better and thus treated better. If everyone knew I was a werewolf, I don't think I would be in this school.

Why do I feel so insecure that I have to rely on the beauty of others? Being smart should have its benefits because I'll be able to find a good job, wait, except that I have to put that I'm a werewolf.

A minority figure who's not really a minority but a danger to the public. Finally, something goes my way, but it's of no use because I'm a werewolf. I guess that's why I hate being smart.

It's not the fact that it's not rewarding, but if I wasn't smart, I wouldn't be so angry, I wouldn't have to care so much. In this life, all I have are my friends and my smartness. If I didn't have intelligence, I wouldn't have to worry so much.

Padfoot acts so carefree, but I know he has problems. James is a hopeless romantic, and Peter is confused about who he is. Me? I'm resentful, yet a nice guy.

I hate being a nice guy too. What does a nice guy do? Holds open the doors for girls (eye candy again!) with their BOYFRIENDS.

I know I may seem selfish, but why is it that I must have these urges, lust almost, yet I seem to be laughed at. Why do I have to have hormones so hyperactive, yet be a werewolf so I can't procreate?

What kind of life is that to live. It's as if it was so unfair because everyone has it easier. Now, granted, you never really know until you walk a mile in their shoes. All I can say is that I have it pretty bad. Is it enough though?

I guess I'm fed up with what I'm expected to be, intelligent, a nice guy. I wish I could just be eye candy. Appreciated from afar, so that the worth is not really what's inside but what's on the outside.

It's how the world works right? I'm judged because I'm a werewolf and not how I act on the inside. So, why can't I just be eye candy?

(A/N: I feel disappointed in this chapter. I'm sorry for taking such a long time to write. I write in segments, as you can note from my lack of flow, and I have written half the story. The problem is that these segments are spread out and certain interludes and major events are yet to be written. Hopefully I'll edit this chapter when I can. It's about 8000 words now and hopefully I'll be able to add in more depth and a Halloween scene. Thanks for your reviews! Appreciation, something that most people never experience. Thanks again…)