Lambert sat on the pearl sofa and scratched at Tianna's ass before turning back to his laptop. This was logical of course because he was in Tianna's body. And having one hell of a good time too! He grinned at the incandescent computer screen and struggled to recollect his intentions. Find Tianna's body. Check. Inhabit it. Check. Check for boobs. Check. Get Stanton's screen name. Check. Instant Message Stanton. Check. OBLITERATE HIM! … not so much. The guy just kept flirting with him. His words! They were so wise and-

TiannasLoveSlave- HOT! You're hotter than the hottest slab of…

TiannasLoveSlave- I MEAN, YOU'RE HOT! So will you go out with me?

Lambert who had never been courted by a man before was rather disturbed to say the least.

EvillerThanStanton- I don't know. I mean, you're really not my type. I mean I like purple and you like blue. I think it was the chicken. You say it was the egg. I have a (beep). You have a (beep).

TiannasLoveSlave- YOU HAVE A WHAT? ARE YOU PLAYIN ME, MAN?

EvillerThanStanton- Well I don't have one at the moment but that's what I was born with.

TiannasLoveSlave- I don't believe this! I just DON'T believe this! Why didn't you tell me?

EvillerThanStanton- Because I knew you'd react like this?

TiannasLoveSlave- ARGH!

TiannasLoveSlave- But you are still hot…

EvillerThanStanton- Enough of this trickery! I will annihilate you!

TiannasLoveSlave- I love it when you talk dirty!

EvillerThanStanton- ARGH!

AuraHadALittleLambert- has just signed on.

AuraHadALittleLambertHey, Boo!

EvillerThanStanton- Hey Aura…

AuraHadALittleLambertDid you waste Stanton yet?

EvillerThanStanton- No. I keep trying but he just brings the subject back around to how hot I am.

AuraHadALittleLambertWHAT?

EvillerThanStanton- Long story. So did you put some gas in the car?

AuraHadALittleLambertGas?

EvillerThanStanton- WOMAN, TELL ME YOU DIDN'T FORGET TO PUT SOME DAMN GAS IN THE CAR!

AuraHadALittleLambertI didn't forget to put some damn gas in the car.

EvillerThanStanton- Really?

AuraHadALittleLambertNo…

EvillerThanStanton- ARGH!

AuraHadALittleLambertYou said to tell you that… anyway, I'm gonna go possess that Serena chick's body again. Should be fun!

EvillerThanStanton- You do that.

AuraHadALittleLambert- has just signed off.

Lambert started to return to his work when:

BrideoftheAtrox- YOU!

EvillerThanStanton- I PLEAD THE FIFTH!

BrideoftheAtrox- I want my body back!

EvillerThanStanton- I want my body baaack!

BrideoftheAtrox- Mocking doesn't work on here.

EvillerThanStanton- Well you cant have it so MWA HA HA HA HA AH HAMUHOHOHOHOHOWHOWHOWHOWFWAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!

BrideoftheAtrox- But I have to talk to Stanton!

EvillerThanStanton- I already have! We have a date for tonight! 8:00! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

BrideoftheAtrox- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

You have just been invited to the chat room: I Hate that Damn Lamb

Lambert cocked an eyebrow. I hate that damn Lamb? What damn lamb? I like lamb- chops. They taste good. He accepted and the chat room screen appeared.

People in the room, I Hate That Damn Lamb:

BrideoftheAtrox

TiannasLoveSlave

EvillerthanStanton

TiannasLoveSlave- Who are you and what's up with the room name?

BrideoftheAtrox- It's supposed to be Lambert. Stupid name box cut me off. And I'm Tianna!

TiannasLoveSlave- Hahaha. No, you're not. But if it's a good time you're looking for, I'm always available! YOU HAVE TO BE HOT THOUGH!

BrideoftheAtrox- I AM Tianna!

TiannasLoveSlave- And what does Tianna have to say about this?

EvillerthanStanton- Er… I'm TOTALLY Tianna!

BrideoftheAtrox- HES LAMBERT! RIGHT, LAMBERT?

EvillerthanStanton- Yes!

EvillerthanStanton- No!

EvillerthanStanton- I mean not that Lambert's not sexy because he is! All the hot girlies love Lambert!

TiannasLoveSlave- Definitely Lambert. Man you suck.

BrideoftheAtrox- Let's kill him.

TiannasLoveSlave- Okay.

EvillerthanStanton- WAIT YOU INSOLENT FOOLS! ITS NOT OVER YET! AURA IS ON HER WAY TO possess Serena!

TiannasLoveSlave- Serena Williams? I whipped that ass in tennis yesterday…

EvillerthanStanton- KILLINGSWORTH!

TiannasLoveSlave- Oh, Serena

TiannasLoveSlave- SERENA

TiannasLoveSlave- SERENAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

TIannasLoveSlave- So Tianna, the real one, what are you doing tomorrow?

BrideoftheAtrox- We have to save Serena, YOU JERK!

TiannasLoveSlave- Aw man… do we have to? If I sit through another cello solo, I'll explode.

TiannasLoveSlave- I mean SERENAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

BrideoftheAtrox- Get ready!

TiannasLoveSlave- Right!

TiannasLoveSlave has left the room.

EvillerthanStanton- DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

BrideoftheAtrox- STOP! THAT'S ANNOYING!

OperationSaveSerena: I'm ready!

BrideoftheAtrox- I MEANT GET READY AND GO TO SERENA'S HOUSE!

OperationSaveSerena- … oh.

OperationSaveSerena has left the room.

BrideoftheAtrox has left the room.

EvillerthanStanton is alone the pathetic lonely jerk.

EvillerthanStanton- WHAT AOL? YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES!

EvillerthanStanton is talking to himself.

Lambert cursed and exited the room before taking a look at the new features on AOL. Hmm… a computerized robot, ZolaonAol? Knows everything? Perfect! This Zola could tell him where to find Stanton.

EvillerthanStanton- Do you really know everything, woman?
ZolaOnAOL 5:04 PM: I know that which is true, believable and justified.
EvillerthanStanton- Whatever. Just tell me where Stanton is
ZolaOnAOL 5:04 PM: Some specific location?
EvillerthanStanton- Isn't that what I said?
ZolaOnAOL 5:04 PM: Suppose I said yes.
EvillerthanStanton- 5:06 PM: WHERES STANTON?
ZolaOnAOL 5:06 PM: Where STANTON is hard to find.
EvillerthanStanton- ARGH! I HATE YOU!
ZolaOnAOL 5:06 PM: What do you have against robots?
EvillerthanStanton- They're... They'll never be hot! Like me! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
ZolaOnAOL 5:07 PM: Try saying that with more or less context. Are you free?

Lambert rolled his eyes and left the IM box. Stupid robots toying with him…

HotChica22- What it is, yo? Wassup?

EvillerthanStanton- What? I er… don't speak ebonics…

HotChica22- Lame… so I heard you were tryna hurt my girl!

EvillerthanStanton- I am! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

HotChica22- Whateva. Ima whup yo natural white ass!

EvillerthanStanton- BRING IT ON!

Lambert whooped and did a bring it on split, impaling his hip on the corner of a table. "IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

EvillerthanStanton- Help! Pain!

HotChica22- You a pussy ass bitch.

EvillerthanStanton- Please! The profanity is killing me!

HotChica22- We still on that?

EvillerthanStanton- What?

HotChica22- See you tonight, mofo!

EvillerthanStanton- BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

HotChica22- …

HotChica22 has just signed off.

EvillerthanStanton- Stupid gangsters…

HotChica22 is no longer signed on.

SerenasRoomisKewl- Sup?

EvillerthanStanton- What it is, yo? Wassup?

SerenasRoomisKewl- …

SerenasRoomisKewl- LOL! LMFAO!

EvillerthanStanton- Argh… well, who is this?

SerenasRoomisKewl- Stanton. I'm in Serena's room. It's kewl.

SerenaRoomisKewl- She has Lava Lamps and pictures of me and CDs and pictures of me and dildos and pictures of me!

EvillerthanStanton- I thought you were supposed to be protecting her.

SerenasRoomisKewl- She's not here.

EvillerthanStanton- So shouldn't you be looking for her?

SerenaRoomisKewl- You're just jealous of my totally cool and awesome room.

EvillerthanStanton- Its Serena's room.

SerenasRoomisKewl- Look at it this way. If Serena's gone, I can totally have her room! I'd make a good Serena. I'm sexy enough!

EvillerthanStanton- You're disturbed.

SerenaRoomisKewl- I know…


I know I know! It wasn't as good but it'll pick up, I PWOMISE! Just been having a bad week.

The Zola AOL thing was for real on my part cuz I actually entered the stuff in to see what she would say

Make sure you go to my authors page and use the link to my DOTM Dating Game! Its kinda goofy…