I was afrais about writing this. Not only because it's direct wrote in my second language, English. Or because I never had had written about Zee and Ro before. But, especially, because it's for a great and dear friend.
And like we both believe, I couldn't help but put my own heart on this...
My own faith and love.
Thanks for everything, Iglika. It's for your help and friendship that I can show my feelings in a good way.
You Can Ring My Bell
To Mimi, my dear friend and confitent
Ro's POV
"C'mon Zee. You know you can do it."
Zee looked at me that silly way, trying to understand my thoughts trought my eyes. But that wasn't right. That was my turn to look at him with an answer in my face. Because I knew he had something inside him, devouring his human soul, so deeply inside, so... real.
I just wanted to know what.
"I don't."
I set on the bed, looking straigh ahead to him. I knew he was worried. It was just a couple of hours ago when I was in front of death with Bennet and his agents. They're getting more serioulsy about taking me and Zee... and I think, they were really trying to hurt me. I think they believe that's the only way to stop Zee.
I'm not stupid to not know how much Zee cares about me. But the fact that I'm weaker than him wouldn't make him stop to reach for his freedom! If I got hurt, Zee'll leave me and go ahead with his journey, without me.
I can't let this happen.
I can't lose my family again. Zee's my family. My friend. My... Zee.
That's why we fought. I yelled to him, tring to make him understand that I could stay with him, even if my safety was in game. But he just answered me the same thing: that he doens't have the right to ask me something like that!
It's like I can't just decide to stay with him by my myself.
But I'll change that. I'll show him, He can do it. He can ask me to stay with him, because I know he cares, he wants me by his side, because I'm his friend. I'm his safe port. I'm his island when the sea has too much storms.
He can ask me everything... why can't he see?
"Yes, you can, thin man. You know what? You can ring my bell."
His eyes sparkled, like I knew they would. It's not about his hologram. I know there's something beyond it. Zee has true eyes behind the blue ones of the hologram. Sweet and child eyes. Even his voice, sometimes, when he trembles or just stop with the mouth open, it's not just a replay of his observations, it's not a copy of other behaviors. It's Zee. It's him and I know, because I know him so deeply like he knows me.
"I can't see what your 'bell' really means, Ro."
I smiled a soft smile to him. How can't this anguished voice come from his doubtfull heart? He's so naive for me. Pure. I looked at myself so many times, trying understand how could I love someone so right and determined in his values, always trying to make the right thing while the all world is sick and dark... he wants to be the knight saving a lost world. A hero, even just inside him. And... well, look at me. I'm Ro. The most lost one.
I like to smile at him.
I don't know why. I just like it.
"It's from a song. An old song. It's like... you know? You can do everything with me. You can ask me everything."
"But Ro! You know I wouldn't do anything that could harm you! I won't ask you anything that you won't like or that could put you in risk or..."
I put my finger on his lips.
Yes, Lips. Beyond the touch of the cold machine, I could feel his lips.
"That's why you can, thin man."
He gave a false smile. I can't help but just know when he's trying to comfort me hidding his worried thoughts in that smile.
He became closer, and in a slow voice, he asked me like a secret:
"Do you really trust me so much?"
His eyes were looking inside me. What could I do? Could he see how deeply he was inside me? How secret and big is his place inside me?
Was it? Trust? How he doubt my faith on him?
I knew that was a different question secretly behind that. And, even I didn't know which was, I already knew the answer.
Just because it was from Zee.
"Yes, I do."
He smiled and I realized that I would never knew what that question really meant to him.
"Thanks."
He stood up, walking to the bathroom. He was going to change the chiffon of my arm. The cut on it wasn't hurting anymore, but well, even in a billion years I'd be able to make Zee understand that kind of cut couldn't kill me.
Even if I yelled with all my air he wouldn't hear me, anyway...
Oh! What was we talking about? Why did I yelled at first time?
Zee, worried, silent. Me, angry, trying to make him understand. But, if he wasn't going to ask me to go stay from him... what could he wanna ask me?
"Hey, Zee! You didn't tell me!"
"What Ro?"
I hated when he asked that 'what ro' with his naive smile, as if I didn't know he knew the exactly thing I was talking about!
"I know there's something bothering you! What do you wanna know, Zee? Do you believe that I'm going away? Or is it if I'm tired of this life besides you? Zee!"
"I don't need to ask anymore, Ro. I already know it."
He re-entered the room, the a white box with a red cruxe on the tamp. He started to take care of my arm, with his shining eyes stuck at his work.
That was eating my mind!
He looked at me, just smiling.
Just that! Smile! I was driving me crazy to know what it's on his thin mad mind and he just gave me a sweet smile?
" So what! C'mon! You know how curious I am! You can't let me without knowing wha..."
Then he kissed me, in a gently and childish kiss.
When he moved a flinch away from me, I heard his softly voice in a whisper:
"I love you too, Ro."
That sounded to me like an old song. Like one that I used to sing myself everyday.
But, it wasn't.
That time, he was ringing my bell.
