Anymore

Written by: Sher of Sherkay

Pairing: J/C and C/J

Disclaimer: I don't own Kathryn Janeway or Chakotay… or the Darren Hayes song I Want You.

A/N: Hey 'yall. I haven't been well – so I just want to say to Kay 'I'M ALIVE AGAIN'

Chapter11: One step at a time.

Kathryn washed her face and stared herself in the mirror, never taking her gaze off her reflection, daring her image to move first. "'Morning" she rasped to herself, suddenly remembering why crying before bed had always been on her 'not to do' list.

"Coffee," was the next thing she said, stumbling out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. Only after her first two sips did she look at the chronometer on the wall, thankful that it was well before she had to be at work. "Romance was never your forte Janeway," she admonished herself silently. She felt like a drunken teenager after a night of partying.

It was only when she regained her stamina did she notice the blinking red light on her console.

Kathryn, it said. Not even a 'dear Kathryn' or 'my Kath'

Thank you for a lovely evening.

Chakotay.

"That's it?" She asked out loud.

"It is if you want it to be."

Kathryn looked up, anger flashed in her eyes "I suppose you think this is funny? Who are you to toy with me?"

He ignored her. "I want to know this is real Kathryn. I want to know you're not going to turn your back on me for 'Fleet. I want to know we feel the same things. I don't want to see a look of horror on your face when I say 'wife' and I don't want to waste my life away waiting for you, and yet, strangely – I still want you."

"I can't go from loving you one day to hating you the next, Chakotay, you know that. But I need you to accept me for who I am. You used to before, but now, you're challenging me. I haven't changed for anyone Chakotay, not for my father, not for Justin and certainly not for you."

"I'm not asking you to change Kath; I'm loving you for who you are. I love you so much; I want you to be happy with me. You broke my heart when you looked away from Paris yesterday. Are you ashamed of me Kathryn? Is that it?"

"Ashamed of you?" Kathryn looked straight into Chakotay's eyes, "Never."

"Then why did you look so shocked?"

"I guess things were going too fast. There I was, old maid of the Delta Quadrant one day and happily-in-love-teenager the next."

"You weren't upset?"

"I was only upset we didn't have a chance to explore it further," Kathryn walked up to Chakotay and laid her hand gently on his cheek, "I want you too, Chakotay. Don't you ever doubt that."

"One step at a time, eh?"

"One step at a time." She melted into him.

TBC…