OPERAREALM

Chapter IX

"Where is he?" Roza mumbled, awakening on the bed in her castle chamber several minutes later. Marenka, and Despina were peering over her.

"Do you have any idea how bad that looked? Despina scolded. "Could you have picked a worse time to have a fainting fit? I had quite a time of it, explaining you away!" She shook her head.

"Despina, leave her alone," Marenka muttered. "She's been through so much..." Roza had started to rise but Marenka gestured sharply for her to stay down and keep the cold cloth on her head. Roza had hit her head on the railing just before Marenka caught her on the stairs.

"If you please..." Roza implored. "Where is he? How is he?"

"Yevgeny Onegin?" Despina asked and Roza nodded eagerly. "I believe he's downstairs by the fire still trying to get warm. He's extremely exhausted, weak and probably frost-bitten..."she stopped, frowning at the look of alarm on Roza's face. "It serves him right if you ask me. The man has gone and made a complete fool out of himself..." she yawned. "I have a good mind to do nothing and just go to sleep!"

"Then you should!" Roza said decidedly, rising to her feet. She went to an old mahogany drawer and pulled out the black velvet mask with the long black lace veil.

"Just what do you think you are doing?" Despina demanded.

Roza slipped on the mask and veil which hid her face and tresses. "I will tend to him...it's the very least I can do for being the latest cause of his distress."

Both ladies cut her off at the same time.

"Roza!" Marenka exclaimed in horror. "I can't believe you are doing this! What if he discovers your identity?"

"Are you completely mad?" said Despina. But she had to admit it was an appealing idea. She was extremely tired and did not want to be bothered.

It was Despina's question that Roza answered. "Maybe I am. But I am utterly compelled to do this in attempt to ease my guilty conscience. Don't worry about me. After all, it is my fate as an artist in Reality that I am defending."

Despina just shook her head. "Very well. There is an abundance of hot tea and soup on the stove in the kitchen and there are several wool blankets and quilts in the trunk behind the sofa in the main sitting room."

And with that, Marenka and Despina retired to their chambers, leaving poor Roza to her blind and treacherous act of compassion. Roza took a last look at herself in the mirror to make sure that she was well-disguised, threw on a black wool shawl to shield herself from the drafts and then promptly departed for the kitchen.

Once in the kitchen, Roza could not believe that she was doing this. Her hands shook in great nervousness as she prepared the tray of steaming tea and soup. She hesitated for several moments and made several false departures for the main sitting room. Then Roza stalled further by trying to find something else that needed to be done, but she could not. Though she did locate a generous plate of biscuits, which she added to the tray. This was it. It was either now or never. After a brief prayer for strength, Roza took a deep breath and left the kitchen with the tray.

Yevgeny laid on a long red velvet sofa which had been pulled up next to the fire, still trying to get warm. When Roza first beheld him, she thought she would burst into tears. He shivered from head to toe and his handsome face conveyed his discomfort and profound sadness. Roza thought it would be rather overwhelming to see Yevgeny again, but she never imagined how intense it would actually feel. It took all of her will power not to run to him and fall in his arms, to comfort him in every way possible. She loved him. She could no longer lie to herself.

Roza proceeded slowly toward Yevgeny, who appeared to be sleeping--or at least trying to. She set the tray down quietly and walked across the room to the other sofa where the trunk that held the blankets was situated.

"Despina...?" Yevgeny murmured suddenly, sounding slightly hoarse and very confused.

Roza jumped, startled by the sound of his voice. "S-she's gone to bed," she told him shakily, slipping back into her disguised voice. "She was extremely tired and I took pity on her. Although I am not a servant, I will do my best to make you comfortable. I can't imagine how awful that journey must have been." Roza opened the trunk and took out three long dark wool blankets and a blue quilt. She then cautiously removed his icy wet boots and encouraged him to soak his feet. Then she wrapped the blankets around him and told him to eat something.

During all of this, Yevgeny watched her with intense curiosity. Roza hoped that he didn't notice that she was trembling. His gaze was extremely piercing, it was as if he were trying very hard to penetrate the mask.

Roza was becoming more and more uneasy. "Do you mind?" she said, reprimanding him for his staring.

"Forgive me," Yevgeny said. "I've just been beside myself with curiosity as to your identity. Have we met?"

"I-I don't think so..." Roza told him uneasily. How she hated to lie and conceal herself from him!

Yevgeny studied her. "I don't know what it is...but there is just something about you...even though I cannot see your face. Forgive me, why do you wear the mask?"

Because I do not want to reveal my presence to you...because if you knew that I am Roza I don't know what you'd do...I don't know what I'd do...I don't trust you any more than I trust myself, Roza thought. "I must wear this mask," she said, unable to keep the great sadness from her voice. "Because of a matter that is of greatest secrecy and my presence cannot be known. Please do not ask me why..."

Yevgeny was totally perplexed and intrigued. "...and your name?"

"I am known simply as Elana," Roza said solemnly. She just had to get out of here! This kind of cruel deceit was pure agony.

"It's a lovely name," Yevgeny commented. "But not as lovely as Roza...I must ask...since you play the woman of mystery...maybe have you seen her. Have you seen my beautiful angel, Roza?" With effort, he slid over on the sofa and reached into the pocket of his damp coat which was discarded on the other side. He reached into an inside pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He unfolded it carefully and showed it to her.

Roza stifled a cry. It was a sketch of herself--a most gorgeous drawing with her long curls cascading around her face. It was her exact likeness.

"I drew this of her...I tried my best to capture her...but my Roza is even more beautiful in person. Please tell me if you have seen her, " Yevgeny implored. "I love her and I must find her."

Roza got up suddenly before he could say anything else that would wound her further. "N-no I have not...I-I'm sorry..."Roza stammered. She could not take this torture any more. If she stayed any longer she might give herself away. "I must bid you good night. It is extremely late and we both need our sleep...you especially since you have been through quite an ordeal. You need your rest so you can regain your strength." Roza started to leave the room.

"Wait!" Yevgeny called.

Roza froze, paralyzed with terror. Only two words came to her mind: He knows... "What is it?" she whispered.

"I just wanted to thank you," Yevgeny told her, yawning drowsily. "I feel much better now...so warm.." he arranged the blankets around himself and laid down.

Roza sighed in relief. "I'm glad," she said earnestly. "Good night." And she left him to ponder himself to sleep while she went and cried herself to sleep.

The residents of the castle awoke to an extraordinary snow storm of which there seemed no end. As far as the eye could see there was nothing but white, blinding white which blew down and drifted and piled up by the foot. When Roza awoke that morning, there had to be nearly two feet of snow and the blizzard showed no signs of letting up.

"You did what?!" Liza demanded.

It was late morning and Liza and Palina had joined Roza for tea in her room. When they learned from Despina what she had done when Yevgeny arrived the night before, they had rushed to her chambers.

"I couldn't help it," Roza explained. "I felt it was my fault that he was upset enough to go out in that snow storm to start with!"

Liza and Palina regarded her with great disbelief.

"Roza--it wasn't your fault!" Palina told her. She frowned and added two sugar cubes to her tea. "Yevgeny's to blame for being so self-centered! So, he thinks you should forsake everything for him? Oh, the man is purely insufferable!"

Liza sipped her tea thoughtfully. "I can understand perfectly why you did it. But you do realize that you took a tremendous risk? You provided the opportunity to arouse his curiosity, if not his suspicion. As far as I know, he knows nothing but he has been talking about "the lady of dark mystery" that aided him last night and asking everyone here what they know about this Elana."

Roza ignored this. "Then Yevgeny--he is all right today?"

Liza frowned. "Yes he is. He says he owes it all to you. But did you hear what I said? You have made him very curious! In my opinion, this curiosity is his subconscious speaking. His subconscious recognizes you, but he is consciously too dense to see it--at least at the moment. You must be very careful, Roza. Do not give him the opportunity to put two and two together. Avoid him as much as possible, even though heaven knows that you'd rather do the opposite."

"It won't be easy snowed inside this lonely castle," Roza said mournfully. "I feel imprisoned here."

"But you have our companionship," Palina offered and Liza nodded.

Roza sighed. It certainly wasn't the same of course. She was aching to be held in Yevgeny's arms more than she was willing to admit. At the time, she felt that she could not feel any worse than she did last night but she was wrong. From the moment she awoke that morning, she felt profoundly depressed and on edge. When Liza and Palina left after tea to find out what was going on downstairs, Roza felt even more alone in the world. Taking Liza's advice she stayed in her room for an hour or so and tried to read--but it was useless. The words became blurry chicken scratches on the page and she was utterly unable to concentrate. Yevgeny's image had even seemed to invade the pages of the book. All of her life, she had always found great comfort in reading, but she found no such solace here. Roza knew she had to leave her chambers and seek distractions elsewhere. She found the silver mask with the black lace veil, put it on and left the room.

As Roza was walking down a long and particularly shadowy corridor, Yevgeny suddenly appeared from one of the rooms. Roza, her nerves shots, dropped the book she was carrying and screamed loudly in surprise and sheer terror!

Yevgeny regarded her in a way that was indescribable. The closest way to describe it was a mixture of confusion and astonishment. "Elana...? What's the matter?" he whispered.

Roza was utterly unable to speak. She felt a lump in her throat and knew if she tried she would completely break down.

Everyone in the castle came running towards them from various directions.

"Elana? Yevgeny?" came Marenka.

"Oh heavens--what's the matter?" came Liza, pale and frightened.

"What has happened?" Palina asked.

"What the hell is going on here?" Despina demanded.

The others just stared at them in confused and concerned silence.

Yevgeny raised his hand, annoyed slightly by their anxious inquires. "Nothing has happened. Elana was just startled..." But he was obviously still very confused.

Now Alexandra took the incentive to ask questions. She left Yeletsky's side and went to stand next to Roza. She was every bit as confused as Yevgeny. "But why did she scream like that? She didn't sound startled to me. That scream was of one of most extreme fright and pain...There is something someone isn't telling us," she narrowed her eyes in suspicion.

Yevgeny's temper flared. "I hope you are not inferring that I would ever harm a woman--"

"No, no," was Alexandra's quick reply. "We all know that you would never do such a thing. It's just that she--"

"That she what?" Yeletsky demanded. "I still think you should keep your nose out of other people's affairs."

Alexandra ignored her husband. "Well, even if I choose not to divulge them at the moment, I do have my suspicions," she said slyly.

Liza stepped forward, terrified for Roza's sake and very angry. "Don't you think that this cross examination has gone on long enough? I'm appalled at you, Alexandra! Have you no manners? Elana told us all the reason why and as a lady you should not doubt her word."

Alexandra, taken aback, was unable to speak for several moments. She looked hard at Roza, trying with all her will to see through the mask. When she spoke at last, she thought aloud, in a low, even voice. "Elana...what is the real reason why you wear that thing?"

Roza tried to answer her, but a great sob choked out her words. Overwhelmed with grief, fear and humiliation, blind with impulse, Roza ran down the corridor and up the stairs to her room where she could lock herself up and be alone with her tears.

Yevgeny was the last to retreat back to his previous place. He stood for a long time staring at the staircase up which "Elana" had run to take solace. There was something about her manner towards him, her very presence that caused something to stir inside of him. It was something intangible and it was starting to really frustrate him that he could not put a finger on it. It was a magnetic something that seemed to pull him towards her. He felt compelled to comfort her, and even more compelled to learn her secret. Why did he get this burning feeling that it was a secret that concerned him? Realizing that this feeling he had made absolutely no sense, he sighed, shrugged and returned to the main sitting room where the Russians and the Czechs were playing chess.