Okage Densetsu - Lookit the Fancy Japanese

Chapter 10 - Business Goes BAD

"Where are we going, anyhow?" Rosalyn looked around, "I mean, we were all so revved up to leave but now we're just standing here."

"Good question- Slave, break out the map!"

"Right..." Ari pulled out the Map O' Evil Kings and uncurled it, then read aloud, "'Again in the city of gears one must go, Business is evil and how so! A piece of paper with name holds power great, closer you are to determining fate.' Huh. Guess we go to Madril."

"But... that's halfway across campus..." Corona whined, wavering slightly. A ghost was sneaking up on her, but before it could get close enough, she suddenly whipped around and launched the spit from the bucket on it. The thing ran away squeaking in terror, turning from a white to a sore red color. Corona went back to her previous position quickly, adding, "I haven't had lunch yet..."

"It isn't that far... We'll get there all together, Corona!" Rin smiled, still hanging off Ari's arm

"Okay..."

"Why are we wasting time? Move, move, move!"

The walk to Madril was the usual: Ghost chasing, ghost dodging, Rin entertaining, Corona drooling, and everything else was part of the usual routine. Of course, Ari was as annoyed as ever, since everyone behind him was basically insane in his or her own special way. But again Ari had something he could possibly look forward to: Linda! What was better than having a girl to stare at, he thought. Holding the secret thought in his head, he forgot about the randomness of the world around him for at least a few minutes. Walking up to the gear-gate, Ari knocked and everyone went in when it was open, the structure sliding shut behind him or her.

Instantly they found themselves being stared at with accusing eyes by the people who were near.

"Uh... I suddenly get the odd feeling... we've done something bad." Ari gazed among the people, and then headed to a group, asking, "Hey, what's going on?"

"You don't know, and you have THAT woman with you?" The lady was referring to Rosalyn, it seemed, "We've found out the heroes and the local big business, Mr. Big Inc have a so-called 'cozy' relationship."

"That's right! The heroes put the ghosts in town to defeat for money and fame! Terrible, praying on innocent townspeople like that!"

"Excuse me!" Rosalyn frowned. "I never did such a thing! To do so would go against my code of honor."

"Honor or not, that's the word, and since everyone is speaking of it..."

Ari's party split from the townspeople, forming their own little circle for discussion. He hit it off, "So someone's spread a rumor about the heroes?"

"Some rumor, I'm surprised it is as potent as they make it," Kisling thought for a minute, then added, "But I still believe it is just a rumor."

"What is this Mr. Big Inc.? I've never heard of it!" Rosalyn huffed, "How can I be in a relationship with anything if I don't know it?"

"Oh dear, then I wonder why you love yourself so much. Hrhrhr. You barely know your own face."

"SHUT UP, YOU ST-"

"Rosalyn! Be nice to Grampa!" Rin whined, tugging on her coat, "Grampa, be nice to Rosalyn!"

"Hah! Some little mortal girl won't stop me from doing anything!" Stan laughed, "Nice attempt, though, pipsqueak! Haha!"

"No matter... no arguing... no victory..." Corona was asleep, but still speaking, "The door must be found..."

"...Well, the Map O' Evil Kings said 'business is evil'- anybody else think that's where we'll find our next Evil King?" Ari looked at everyone and got nods from the conscious ones, "Then let's go investigate."

"Where IS the building? I still swear I've never heard of the company."

"I have," Kisling spread his arms out, only to suddenly have a Rin attached to one of them- not minding a bit, he continued, "There's a little building down here on the first floor labeled Mr. Big, Inc. No doubt that's the headquarters. I just can't tell you what kind of business they're into."

"The business of spreading lies!" Rosalyn grumbled...

"INDEED! Calling themselves Evil Kings... we need to take out that rat's nest, pronto, slave!"

"Right. Everyone ready?"

"Right!" Everyone yelped it back in their own way, even Corona. Heading off, the group followed Kisling to a rather inconspicuous building with an orange-haired woman standing by the door, wearing a blue business vest and a white shirt, finished with a pair of black pants and black shoes. Kisling approached this woman first, figuring he was expected to as he was leading at the moment.

"Excuse me, Miss, can we go in?"

"Unless you have an appointment, the office prefers you go fu- Oh. There is a child here. In polite terms, get the hell out!" The woman giggled cutely.

"Er... we do. I am Guten Kisling, researcher of Ghosts and other out worldly paranormal subjects. I believe I faxed you?"

"Oh, we'd LOVE to believe you, but you need a referral anyhow." The woman waved a hand at Kisling, "You know, business cards from up-and-ups."

"Er, alright." Kisling turned to the group, "I believe we need to go around, kiss some butts, and find referall cards."

"Uh, okay..." Ari suddenly had an idea, "Let's split up! Corona and I will go upstairs. Rin, go find Maggie and see if she can help you get some. Everyone else gets down here, okay?"

"Alright, lovebug." Rosalyn snickered under her breath, not being heard as she split off from the group in search of referrals.

"What is a lovebug?" Marlene followed Rosalyn close behind.

"Come on, Corona." Ari led her off to the elevator, only pausing to wave bye at Rin who made sure he knew she was leaving. Heading up, he parked Corona near the elevator (rather unwisely, he'd find later) and spotted his favorite singer on her usual street-corner. Plodding on over, he smiled, "Hey there!"

"Oh! You're back again! Hehe, you're all over the place, Coach!"

"I'm a busy guy."

"With what? Are you a flirt?" Linda winked.

"Oh- no, nothing like that..." Ari let out a rather uncomfortable laugh, then tried to think of something to say. His mind refocused on the actual plan- "Hey, I need... some referall cards. Do you know where I can get any?"

"Oh sure! Hold on!" Linda started digging around in her dress, but mostly in the area of her bosom, causing Ari to blush intensely. She pulled out a few cards, sorted through them quickly, then held one out at him, "Here! This is a card to the club 'Violetric'. It's a really fancy place and they're picky about who comes! This is what you wanted, right?"

Ari gingerly took the card, noting it was still warm from being, er, stashed. "I... g-guess... t-thank you."

"Need anything else, Coach?"

"N-nope. That'll do me f-for the day."

"Hehe! Okay! Now you better come back and see me!" She suddenly pulled the massive bow off her head, though Ari wasn't paying much attention. Suddenly she caught him up with it, tying it into a loose bow around his neck, "Aww, now aren't you adorable?"

"...Uh..." He could no longer think intelligently, flushed as all get out.

"Now you go and have a good day, Coach! Keep the gifts." She winked once more, "I'll be waiting."

"O-okay...?" He slowly meandered off in a random direction, not at all hearing the quiet giggles behind him. Parking a distance away, he suddenly shook his head and pocketed the card, then slowly untied the bow. Staring for a moment, he gave a small smile, then suddenly stuffed it into his pocket. Then he looked up, trying to find his team member. Of course, there was no Corona. "Oh god Corona..."

"What?"

"AAAAH!" He whipped around to find her behind him, her eyes closed. "Stop that!"

"Look..." She held her bucket up at him, which was full to the brim with cards, "Fancy fortune slips."

"Huh?" He took one, and was surprised to find it was a business card, "Hey, good job! Where did you get these?"

"Fortune cookie shop."

"...Right. Let's go find the others."

Meanwhile, Rin had contacted Maggie and had gotten a hand-drawn card from her, and then the little girl quickly hurried to find everybody. During that time, Kisling got hit upside the head by Rosalyn for hitting on her, but didn't much care. Marlene spent most of the time just directing where Rosalyn should look next... The heroine herself only managed to get one card, but she didn't much care since she was trying to stay away from the scientist as he was trying to calculate her 'dimensions'. The party all regrouped (excluding Rin) outside the doors to Mr. Big Inc.

"I got a card from a drunk woman," Rosalyn turned the card over in her hand, "She said she was the CEO of something but her head hurt so much she couldn't remember what. I don't know if it'll do, but..."

"I got a card from under a bench," Kisling was smiling even though his head was pounding from being hit, "It seems to be important, even if it has a mud smear on one corner."

"I did my part in leading the search," Marlene spoke monotonely.

"Well, er, I got a card to a place called Violetric." Ari looked at his card, "I don't know how much good it'll do us. Oh, and I have a card from Dad in my pocket, but somehow I think that will do us less good than this card. But I think Corona wins this one- she somehow managed to fill her bucket with nothing but different cards. Now, where is Rin?"

"Coming!" She came running over, panting.

"So, what'd you find?"

"Here!" Rin handed over the handmade card, getting a weak smile from everyone. Smiling back, she suddenly pointed beside her, "I also found HER!"

Everyone looked where she pointed and saw nothing. Then everyone looked at each other, and Kisling, Rosalyn, and Ari simply laughed weakly, before asking her who this invisible person was.

"Fayth! Can't you see her?"

"Uh, sure..." Rosalyn tried to smile convincingly, "Will Fayth be coming with us?"

Rin nodded, "She's very happy to be with a group of people, but she's sad because you cannot see her."

"Well, er, Fayth can come along where ever we go, Rin," Ari figured there was no harm in supporting Rin's imagination, "Just make sure she behaves!"

"Okay!"

"Alright, let's try the door again."

"Allow me." Kisling walked up, greeted the door(woman)man and gave her the card. Apparently that was enough, as she gave them a thumbs-up and opened the doors. Everyone followed the Doctor into the building, first stepping into what seemed to be the visitor's office. There was a woman at the desk, identical to the door-guard, but nobody had the chance to take a double-take at the first woman since the door was shut tight. Kisling walked to the desk, asking, "Can we go upstairs and meet the owner of this building?"

"You'll need a referral to do that, silly!"

Rin suddenly tugged on Ari's sleeve, whispering, "Lemme give her my card."

"Uh, Rin, I don't..." Ari sighed, picking her up, "We'll try."

They walked over as Ari gave Rin the card. He nodded at her to speak, and so she spoke proudly, "Hello, miss! Here's a referall!"

Taking the card from the girl, the woman suddenly broke into a grin. "Aww, how cute! A wittle pretend business card! Okay, wittle miss, you can go in!"

"Yay! Come on, everybody!" Rin instructed Ari to walk to the next door that led into the stairwell. Much to everyone's shock, the woman standing in the room was the -exact- same person as the doorman and secretary. The dark stairwell was drab, to say the least, not at all a place for anything much to look at. Rin broke the silence, exclaiming, "That's creepy!"

"Hmm?" The woman looked everyone over, "Hello, how can I help you?"

"We wish to see the man upstairs..."

"You'll need a referall."

Everyone looked at each other, and then Ari looked at the woman, explaining with a raised eyebrow, "Didn't we just give you two referrals?"

"Huh? I haven't seen anything like that."

"Right... here." Rosalyn handed over her card, "Will this do?"

"Yeah! Please, go right on up."

"Thank you." Rosalyn headed up first, followed by everyone else. Suddenly everyone was stuck with a sense of deja vu on the second floor, since the stairwell was an -exact- copy of the one below, the -same- orange haired woman from before standing there. "What in the holy...?"

"Hello, how can I help you?"

By this time, Stan had popped out, "What is this, some kind of paradox? I'll give this one credit: this IS Evil..."

"Uh, we need to get upstairs," Ari blinked, taking out his card, "Here?"

"...Hmm? OH WOW! VIOLETRIC!" The woman shrieked in excitement, "I've ALWAYS wanted to go to this club! Holy crap- go on up, but don't tell the boss!"

Everyone headed up and almost screamed. Again everything was the exact same.

"Hello, how can I help you?"

Corona split from the freaked-out group, then suddenly threw the bucketful of cards on the woman. She signaled for everyone to come up, the party weaving around the bewildered woman. But this time, even Corona let out a yelp- the exact same room awaited them.

"What floor are we on, anyway?" Rosalyn shrieked, "This is TERRIBLE!"

"Please," Marlene suddenly spoke, "We wish to get upstairs."

"We'll need a-"

"I am the Princess of the royal family. I demand you let me through."

"Oh, your highness! If you had just said something at the desks you could've been escorted all the way to the top!"

"HEY! WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING BEFORE?" Stan was fuming, "WE COULD'VE AVOIDED THIS WHOLE MESS!"

"I found it amusing," Marlene emotionlessly looked at Stan, "It was fun since it annoyed you."

"Well you got the rest of us while doing so." Ari grumbled.

"Now come on, guys... er, your Highness, it was a fine joke! Hah!" Rosalyn sighed, "But we must go up."

"Indeed."

Walking up the stairs, everyone was relieved as HELL to find a new room at the top.

It was a plush, cozy little office. No windows, so it was dim. Red carpets, wood paneled walls... a thick, sturdy desk and a matching chair, not to mention stylish file cabinets to the sides. Certificates hung off the walls, and tacky posters were taped up. But most importantly, there was a huge, fat man behind the desk smoking a cigar. The party slowly walked in front of the desk, causing the man to stir. "Hm? Visitors? Now how did you get up here?"

"Referrals. Referrals upon referrals upon referrals." Ari grumbled, "And the endless, same staircase for four-to-five floors."

"Oh." The man shifted in his chair, "Now what is it you wanted?"

"Who ARE you, and why are you spreading lies? Speak now and perhaps I'll spare you from my blade!" Rosalyn had it at the ready.

"You look incredibly stupid with that thing open inside a building, you know." He stood up, "I am... the Evil King of Chairmen! I am the true evil: The politicking, slander-spreading, greasy, weasely King who will take over this pathetic world!"

"How will you do that? I wish to record it for later study."

"Easy! I will spread rumors about the other Evil Kings. Soon, they will begin fighting, and will wipe each other out. While I sit cozy in my office, they'll be doing the hard work of destroying themselves and innocent people at the same time. I'll keep fueling the rumors by bribing the media! Then, after they're all gone, I'll just take over the world! Bahahaha!"

"What a BORING plan..." Rosalyn yawned, purposely being rude; "Even a child could have come up with something better than that."

"You don't always need razzle dazzle to be evil!"

"How DARE you speak as if you know true evil!" Stan swung an angry fist down in the air, "You know nothing, and you bloated egg-sucking weasel!"

"Besides," Marlene casually brushed some of her hair out of her face, "Now that we know, we could foil your plan. I control the media."

"Ah, but Your Majesty... I have a second plan! Haha! I heard about the incident at Rashelo - the princess, saved by the heroes, only to be... oh... 'attacked' by that young man at the head."

Ari's cheeks flushed slightly, but he didn't say a word.

"Now, this I can use to my advantage, see? I will make all the newspapers read this headline: Princess having affair with servant. Servant first met Princess when he assaulted her.' The rumors will build and both of your lives will be ruined! Bwahaha! What do you say about that?"

Marlene stared in what looked like slight horror for a moment, clearly searching for something to say as the man bellowed heartily. She looked at Ari who was still pink in the cheeks, then suddenly nodded to herself. Instantly moving beside Ari, she announced loudly and proudly, "Then do so, as we are in love!"

"WHAT?" Ari nearly jumped thirty-feet at this announcement, only to get hit across the head by Rosalyn who harshly, yet quietly told him she was just saying it. Though he had a hard time convincing himself about it, as he stared in the utmost disbelief at Marlene.

"This is impossible! Well, then, if you won't succumb to slander, I'll take another approach." He suddenly hit the intercom button on his desk, calling, "Tilly, please come to the office."

"Right away, sir!" The voice of the multiple-copy woman spoke through the intercom, then everyone heard feet running up the concrete stairs. She burst through the door, with files in hand, grinning away, "What can I do for you?"

"Just stay handy. Now behold my amazing, evil powers!" The Evil King of Chairmen's cigar suddenly lit with a flash of light, temporarily stunning everyone.

"...That was cool, but was there a point?" Kisling scratched his head.

"You idiot, can't you tell he now has enough power to incinerate the building?" Stan grumbled, "Stupid human."

"Oh. That's not a good thing."

"It is for me! Hahaha! TILLY! Please escort these people out." He sat in his chair, putting his feet up on the desk.

"Hey, you fat pig!" Rosalyn yelled, "Don't send your stupid secretary after us, you coward!"

Tilly suddenly dropped down in front of everyone, tossing the files away- she suddenly whipped out a pair of nun chucks, grinning cutely. "Thank you for visiting Mr. Big Inc. Please allow me to show you to the exit. We hoped you enjoyed 'Your Life'."

"No way in hell!" Ari shouted, "Come on, guys! Let's kick some secretary ass!"