Don't Eat the Moth!

Saraman

Gandalf was at the battle of the Black Gate fighting when he saw his 'Go go Gadget moth' flying down to give him a message. Gandalf was about to say "Thank you, my friend," when the moth flew into his mouth and he accidentally swallowed it. Gandalf began to choke. He couldn't say a word. The eagle Gwahir, who was above him, saw Inspector Gandalf eat the moth and was very angry that he had eaten his best friend.

"Hmmm," thought the eagle. "I suppose I will not fight the Nazgul to defend him after what he just did!" So Gwahir did not join the other eagles in fighting the Nazgul and simply flew high above his comrades to watch the outcome of the battle. A great Fell Beast with a Wraith riding atop his back swooped down upon Gandalf, and with an ear-piercing shriek, siezed Inspector Gandalf in his talons and bore him away.

"Hey you," shouted Gandalf. "Put me down! Put me down this instant! This instant I say!" The Nazgul and Fell Beast paid no attention to his order. Instead, the Fell Beast flew as fast as its wings could carry it, straight to Mount Doom. It was then that Gandalf noticed something. With each foul beat of its wings, the Fell Beast was rising up higher and higher towards the top of the mountain. Gandalf coughed up the moth and since it was mechanical, it was alive and kicking (Or flapping). Gandalf gave the moth another order.

"Find Gwahir. Find Gwahir. Go!" The moth flew away as fast as its little wings could carry it, back to the Black Gate.

"Uh oh," said Gandalf as he realised where they were. He was staring down inside the very volcano of Mount Doom.

"Oooh," said Gandalf. "This cannot be good." The Fell Beast's claws released him. Down Inspector Gandalf plummeted, into the volcano's crater. He fell down farther and farther. He was beginning to feel the searing heat now.

"Ahhhhhh!" said Gandalf. He was thinking that he should use one of his Go go Gadget machines, but he just couldn't remember which one he should use. "Go go Gadget phone!" he said. He heard a dial tone.

:I'm sorry. Your call cannot go through. If you need help, please hang up and dial your operator.:

"Whoops," said Gandalf. "Wrong one." He could now see the lava hundreds of feet below him. He was falling faster and faster, his body picking up more speed every second.

"Go go Gadget butt!" said Gandalf. That was a mistake. As you may well guess, the inside of a volcano is not a wise place to fart. A tremendous explosion rocked the volcano, shaking the entire mountain. Legolas could see it from a distance.

"What was that?" he asked quizzically. "Where did Gandalf go?" Gandalf was not doing too well. In fact, his hair was singed and his face was black with smoke. His clothes had burnt off, leaving him in his underwear. He coughed out smoke and sputtered,

"That was obviously the wrong one!" He had to think a moment.

"Which one should I use to get out of here?" Forty feet between him and the lava. Twenty.

"Oh, I've got it!" exclaimed Inspector Gandalf. "Go go Gadget Helicopter!" His head opened up and out popped helicopter blades. He stopped falling less than one-half of an inch from the lava.

"Whew!" sighed Gandalf. "That was a close one." He put his helicopter on turbo speed and he was flying out of the volcano as quickly as he'd come. Once he was out of the crater, he flew back to the Black Gates to continue fighting. He landed in front of the army soiled and burnt, but all in one piece. Both armies stared curiously at him for at least a full minute before someone in the ranks began laughing. It was Aragorn. Gandalf was indignant.

"Have you any idea what I've just been through?" But that only made it worse. Soon, the entire army was laughing, including the Orc army and the eagles. The Orcs thought that he looked so stupid they turned around and marched, laughing hysterically, back through the gates. Inspector Gandalf had saved the day! It was, in fact, a Middle-earth rendition of 'The Emperor's New Clothes'!

Finis