Author's Notes:Neither Fruits Basket nor the Fruits Basket characters belong to me. They are the property of Natsuki Takaya. Sakura Alexander is an originalcharacter from "When Spring Comes Remember Me" For her story, I would have to say please read that story. It is by Yuki Seki, my daughter I suppose I should add. When I originally began this story, Sakura was to have a larger part, but somehow or other, it got minimized as the scenes between Tohru and Akito multiplied.
I realized something about myself as I was writing this fanfic. For a person who loves happy endings, namely me, this one seems to have ended sadly but with a note of hope. Please read and review.
Chapter 21 Akito and his true feelings
Akito approached the room that had been set aside for Sakura Alexander. Just what is going on here? Hatori has never disobeyed me so openly, have I really lost him this time? He stopped just outside the closed door listening to the laughter and voices from within. He heard Ayame's jovial laugh, Shigure's amused cackle, Hatori's quiet chuckle, and general laughter from the other Sohmas inside. He identified the other voices as being Yuki, Kyo, Hatsuharu, and Momiji. He then heard Kagura laugh. Just like with Tohru, they migrated to the side of an outsider. Wasn't his will enough to keep them in line any more? Had he been too lenient with his juunishi? Had he erred in allowing his feelings for Tohru to keep her within the family's stronghold? Just as he was about to open the door he was interrupted by Tohru's light footsteps as she brought the tray of soup and bowls to the room.
"Akito-san, I thought you would have already joined everyone. They do sound like they are having a wonderful time don't they? I guess Sakura-san must have awakened. I know they must be hungry. You are going to join us aren't you?"
"Tohru-san, I do believe I have changed my mind. I am suddenly very tired. If you will please excuse me."
"But Akito, I made enough for you as well as the others. Shall I bring a tray to your room after every one else is comfortable?"
"That would be most kind of you Tohru-san. I do find myself to be hungry."
"Please do go rest Akito-san. I will be with you in a little while."
"Tohru-san, while I will enjoy seeing you this evening, I do still wish to join you for the hanami and matsuri tomorrow. I will enjoy visiting with you tonight but I am truly looking forward to tomorrow."
"No Problem! We will do both. Take care Akito-san. I will bring you your tray soon."
Akito turned around and headed back to his quarters. He had walked halfway there before he stopped himself. What am I doing? Why did I change my mind just because she appeared? Has she really come to mean this much to me that I would abandon pride and avoid this confrontation because it might sadden her? It isn't just Tohru though, I have already declared myself too tired to join the others and will not turn back now. They would laugh at me and realize my weakness. Aside from that, dealing with eight of my juunishi and two outsiders all at the same time is a little more than I want to deal with after an already long day. Arriving back at his apartments he realized how very tired he truly was. It had been quite an eventful day for him. Spring was coming. Tohru was his spring. Why had he been so slow to realize this?
Tohru tripped lightly into the room. "Good evening everyone. I am so happy to see you home safe again Alexander-sensei!"
She set the tray down on the side table and ran to Sakura's bedside. "Sakura-san I've missed you so much! Welcome home." She gently embraced the older woman and then stood back, a glimmer of moisture in her eyes. Sakura tugged on Tohru's hand and pulled her into a return hug. "I've missed you too, Tohru-kun."
Yuki noted Tohru's tears and passed her his handkerchief. "Honda-san, please dry your tears. Everything is fine."
She took his handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes. "I am just so happy!" She smiled joyfully and everyone in the room smiled with her.
The conversation and laughter resumed as Tohru served up the soup and made sure everyone had a hot cup of tea. A storm was brewing outside. She could see the lightning through the open window. "Excuse me please, I promised Akito-san that I would bring him a tray with soup and hot tea."
Eight pair of eyes turned to Tohru wide with surprise.
"Akito? When did you talk to him Miss Honda?" Yuki asked in concern.
"I was in the kitchen preparing the leek stew when Akito-san surprised me by appearing at the door. I think he was curious about all the activity. I invited him to come eat with us and he accepted, but when I caught up with him outside the door, he had changed his mind. I offered to take him a tray after I was done here."
"Tohru-kun, I will walk you over to Akito's. It's dark outside and there is no telling what might be about in the dark," Shigure offered.
"Thank you Shigure-san. That is very kind of you, but it really isn't necessary."
"Ahhh…. Tohru-kun, but it is. If something should happen to you I would blame myself don't you see?"
"In that case, okay."
Yuki and Kyo looked at Shigure with daggers in their eyes.
"Don't do anything improper Shigure" Hatori warned.
"Ha-san, whatever do you mean? I am the soul of innocence with our dear Tohru-kun." Shigure protested. Hatori rolled his eyes at that pronouncement.
"Come Tohru-kun. Let's leave behind these that don't believe in my pure intentions." She is the only one, that much is true. Our flower will always be safe from my baser instincts. Don't you know that yet Hatori-san?
Shigure and Tohru exited the room. Yuki looked at Hatori. "Hatori, what was that all about?"
"Yuki, in this case, do not worry. Believe it or not, Shigure does worry when Tohru is alone with Akito. I know he's been behaving very well towards her, but we are still concerned. Neither Shigure nor I wish to see Tohru hurt." I am certain I don't, but does Shigure think the same? Akito is always first in his thoughts.
"But what about her being alone with him?" Kyo muttered.
"What was that Kyo?"
"Nothing…"
Unaware of the stir left behind, Shigure and Tohru continued to Akito's quarters.
"Just a minute Shigure-san, I need to put together the tray for Akito-san. Do you think he would like a cup of hot tea as well? It's a little cool outside and it seems as if it may begin raining."
"Certainly, Tohru. Akito does enjoy a cup of hot tea especially in weather such as tonight's."
Tohru put together the tray and Shigure offered to carry it. After all of Tohru's protests were overruled and they finished the last part of the walk to Akito's quarters.
Tohru knocked on the door since the tray occupied Shigure's hands. Kureno opened the door and saw the two of them standing there. "Akito is indisposed, please don't disturb him"
Akito weakly called from his pallet, "Kureno, let them in. I did request Tohru-san bring me a tray."
Kureno reluctantly stepped aside as he let them enter.
Tohru rushed over to Akito's pallet and felt his forehead. "Akito-san you are burning up, you must have overdone it with the graduation excitement and your walk to Hatori's clinic in the night time chill. Shall I run get Hatori?"
Akito relaxed under Tohru's soothing touch. "I think this will pass in a short while. No need to disturb Hatori at the moment. Shigure, bring the tray over here."
Shigure complied with Akito's orders. Tohru continued to hover over Akito with great concern. She propped up his pillows and made him as comfortable as she could then placed the tray where he could easily access it.
Shigure stepped back and watched the performance, his presence forgotten by the two young people. He was a little surprised that Akito was allowing Tohru such freedom although it was much as Hatori had said. He judged that either Akito was really not well at the moment or that he was really very fond of Tohru. Shigure had seen the feelings blossoming among the two, but this was the first time he had seen it so openly displayed.
Akito attempted to eat a couple of bites of the stew, but his hand was shaking badly. Tohru offered to assist him. At first anger flared in his eyes and he was on the verge of refusing her assistance, but then he fell weakly back against the pillows and nodded his head.
"Shigure-san, please go get Hatori-san. This cannot be good for him to be this weak. Kureno, please go get a damp cloth and a basin of water for Akito-san."
Shigure reluctantly retraced his steps back to Hatori. Kureno brought damp wash cloths and a bowl of cool water.
"Thank you Kureno" Tohru murmured. Turning back to Akito she finished feeding him the leek stew and then offered him the cup of hot tea. He accepted it with not a word. After a couple of sips, he lay back on his pillows and Tohru applied the cool damp cloths.
"You know, Akito-san, often I would get a fever and have to go to bed. Mom, well, she would always bring me leek soup and hot tea. I remember her soft hands as she tended to me. No matter how busy she was, Mom always had time for me. I am so glad I can help you in the same way that she used to help me. Mom used to say. 'Tohru-kun, always help when there is a chance because you never know when you may need someone to help you. She would say that we touch many people's lives and one of the things they remember most is that a person cared about them. "
Akito gently touched Tohru's lips to stop her from rambling. He looked at her wearily. He was so very tired. This day had not turned out at all like he expected. He drifted off to sleep and dreamed. It was a dream foreign to him. He dreamed of a woman's soft touch, of the feeling that someone truly cared what happened to him. A gentle smile settled on his face and he half woke from his pleasant dream. "Thank you Tohru-san. I and all my juunishi love you, you know," Akito said softly and drifted back into his peaceful sleep. His voice had been so low that Kureno did not hear his words. Tohru continued to apply the soft cloths, the surprise in her sea-green eyes hidden by the brown curtain of hair concealing her face.
Kureno could only watch in amazement. In all the time he had been with Akito he had never seen such a peaceful expression on the young man's face. He looked closely at the young woman and wondered just what it was about her that seemed to comfort all with whom she came in contact. Being in the same room with her just brought a sense of peace.
Hatori rushed back to Akito's rooms with Shigure. He was extremely concerned about Tohru being there alone at this time of night, and he was worried about Akito as well. He walked into the room with his medical bag and could only stop and stare. Tohru was kneeling by Akito's bed applying cool cloths and Akito was sleeping, a serene smile on his lips. The empty bowl of soup and the partially empty cup of tea rested on the table by the bedside. They were a silent testimony to Tohru's care of Akito. Hatori's eyes turned to Shigure who could only shrug. Kureno noted the two men and motioned them over to Akito's bedside. Hatori hesitated to examine Akito. He looked so at peace and the flush on his cheeks, as described by Shigure, seemed to have lessened under Tohru's tender ministrations. "I don't think there is really a need for me to examine him at the moment" Hatori said softly. Kureno and Shigure could only agree.
"Hatori-san, are you sure? He was burning up just a short while ago." Tohru inquired worriedly.
"Tohru-kun, I think you have done exactly the right thing. He is resting peacefully and I don't want to disturb him at the moment. I will examine him when next he awakens. Shigure, take Tohru-kun and collect Yuki and Kyo and head on home. I will stay here until Akito awakens. Ayame, Kagura, Haru, and Momiji can keep Sakura-chan company for a little while yet since they are all staying here at the main house tonight."
Shigure nodded his head and agreed with Hatori's suggestion. Hatori expected a protest but it never materialized.
"Hatori-san, are you sure it's okay if we leave you here with him. I can stay and help if you like" Tohru offered. Hatori shook his head. "Thank you Tohru, but I think you have done as much as can be done. I will call tomorrow morning and let you know how your patient is doing."
"Oh no Hatori-san, he's not my patient. I only filled in while we were waiting for you."
Hatori smiled as he watched the earnest young woman. "No one could have handled this any better than you have Tohru-kun. Thank you. Now go home and get some rest. You have had an eventful day."
"Kureno," Hatori said softly to the younger man sitting across the bed from him, "go ahead and get some rest. This attack is not like any other with which I have dealt. We won't know until the morning what the meaning is."
The room was quiet as Hatori sat by Akito's bed. The storm raged outside. The thunder rumbled loudly and lightning flashed through the window lighting the face of the young man sleeping peacefully. Hatori watched him, his eyes soft with concern. Occasionally a grimace of pain would cause the features to contort, but then once again the tender smile would come to his lips.
"Hatori," a quiet whisper came from the bed upon which Akito rested.
"Yes Akito, I am still here."
"Hatori, I love her you know. I wanted to make her fall in love with me and then break her heart. I wanted her broken Hatori… you know I ordered the death of her mother. I wish I could take that order back, but I can't."
"I know Akito…"
"You do, but how?"
"I was the one ordered to erase the memories, I was the one who saw the desire for revenge on your features. I was the one who had to erase Kureno's memories. I can erase other people's memories but I cannot erase my own… I never told anyone else though Akito, because I love you."
"Hatori, even after everything, you never blamed me. I never quite understood you, but you are quite like her you know. I am sorry Hatori for the pain I have caused you."
"Thank you Akito. I am pleased by that comparison. As for the pain, it's in the past. My heart has been healed. She has healed it with her compassion and joy in life." The young man drifted back into slumber only to awaken once more
"Hatori" came the soft voice again, "tell everyone I am sorry. Only now that I am dying do I realize what Tohru meant when she told me I was alive. No, that's not true. I learned what it was to be alive when I learned to love her. Be happy Hatori. I want the others to be happy as well." Akito closed his eyes once more. His breathing more labored.
Hatori felt tears welling in his eyes. Akito with all of his anger and all of his cruelty was still very dear to him. He feared that when the sun came up next morning, Akito would no longer be with them.
Tohru, unable to wait for Hatori's phone call left Shigure's house before the sun had risen. She made her way to Sohma house and to Akito's quarters. The door stood slightly ajar and she pushed it open just enough to see inside. Hatori was still at Akito's bedside where he lay very still. She walked softly across the floor.
"Hatori-san" she whispered, "how is Akito-san?"
Hatori opened his eyes and saw her there. Somehow, it seemed fitting that she be standing there. He glanced at his patient who was still breathing though somewhat shallowly.
"See for yourself Tohru-kun."
Tohru approached Akito's bedside. He somehow felt her presence and opened his eyes. "Tohru-san" he said weakly "You are here."
"Yes Akito. I promised I would come to visit today."
"But not so early," he said with a faint smile. The rain was still misting and the sky was still gray waiting for the sunrise.
"That's true Akito-san, but I wanted to be here this morning."
"I'm glad you came. There is something I must tell you, come closer please."
Tohru approached the bedside and knelt down. Akito reached out and took her hands in his.
"Tohru-san, " Akito spoke again, his voice quite weak. " Last night, I told you that my Juunishi and I loved you. I meant it, but even more, I meant that I love you." Akito lay back once more. "Be happy Tohru."
Tohru looked at him, a soft sheen of tears in her eyes. "Akito-san you are loved more than you know" she whispered softly. "I love you Akito-san. Look out the window, The cherry blossoms are blooming. Spring is here Akito-san." The sun chose that moment to break through the clouds and erase the rain.
"Thank you Tohru" He watched the sun rise through his window and illuminate the flight of the cherry blossoms then lay back and closed his eyes for the last time. There really was nothing more to be said.
"Hatori-san," Tohru said tearfully, "I loved him."
"I know Tohru-kun."
Hatori watched the tears in Tohru's eyes and embraced her without thinking. She cried on his shoulder until there were no more tears. Akito's tortured soul was finally at rest.
