Here we are: the last chapter. Can you believe this? I am flabbergasted. I truly am. So, I'll leave you to the story, and then at the end I give all my thank you's out...I've got a few of them.
Ryan stopped. No. He was caught. Slowly, he turned around to see Marissa standing there.
"Don't go," She told him, hoping he would listen. Ryan didn't move or say a word. He was glued to his spot. "Please don't."
Ryan didn't want to listen to her. He had to get out of Newport, and not be stopped.
"Why are you leaving?" Marissa asked him.
"You guys want me to leave," Ryan simply answered.
"You listen to us all the time?" Marissa tried to joke. She wished eight months ago she had stopped him. Then this wouldn't be happening.
"I do drugs," Ryan was ashamed he did them, but temptation was temptation.
"I don't really understand why though," Marissa couldn't pinpoint why he did them.
"I thought you would be the only person who would really understand. It's an escape. Just like your drinking," And then all the fights with Ryan came back to Marissa. He had been hinting at it for so long. And she never got it.
"Ryan, why would you need an escape? Your life is great now," Marissa still wasn't getting it completely.
"So is yours," Ryan looked up at her.
"Don't change the subject. I want to know why you do drugs," Marissa wasn't kidding.
"I told you. An escape," Ryan answered again.
"From what?" Marissa wished she had seen it sooner, talked to him more, stopped it.
"I don't know," Ryan really didn't have an answer. He didn't know why he did it.
"There has to be a reason Ryan. You just don't all of a sudden do drugs," Marissa was keen on finding an answer.
"I don't know," Ryan didn't want to talk to Marissa. He wanted to get on that bus and leave.
"Yes, you do. Tell me. Now," Marissa was getting annoyed. He had to tell her.
"Temptation, cravings, I guess," Ryan answered, getting sick of this conversation. His hand started to shake, so he stuffed it into his pocket fist-like.
"But you're stronger than that. You know what happens," Marissa always knew Ryan as the tough guy, who beat everything. She didn't know if she could handle seeing him this weak. Her truth was turning into a lie.
Ryan was nothing like she remembered him being. Something was obviously off. He had changed. Not just his appearance, but something inside him changed. Disappeared.
Or reappeared.
"Well, I must not be that strong," Ryan shot back with anger. He knew he was screwed up, he ruined everything. He didn't need Marissa telling him.
"But you are. Why'd you put yourself through this?" Marissa wouldn't get through life if Ryan left again. It hurt so much the first time.
"I really don't know. I told myself it was wrong, but I didn't listen," Ryan might as well give in. If he spoke faster, he'd be on his way faster.
"I know how that feels," Marissa commented. She was getting better, and Ryan was getting worse.
"Figured," Ryan added.
"Do you want it now?" Marissa stopped drinking because of what Ryan said. Maybe she could fully stop him.
"I wanna say no, but my body is saying otherwise," Ryan produced his hand, which was shaking violently. Marissa understood.
"Right," She replied.
"Listen, I should be going," Ryan began to turn and go to the bus.
"Stop. Don't leave. You can't," Marissa couldn't let him leave.
"Why not?" He turned back around. "No one wants me here," Seth and Marissa's words echoed in his ears.
"I do," Marissa was gonna stop Ryan from leaving. She had to. The Cohens didn't know he was here. If she let him go, that was it.
"You told me to go back to Chino and leave everyone alone," Getting kicked out would've been easy to deal with. The words his two best friends told him hurt like hell.
"So I lied," Marissa walked close to Ryan. "Listen, Ryan, if you leave, I don't think any of us will make it through. You hold us together," She told him.
"No, I don't," Ryan didn't want to believe that.
"You'd be surprised," Marissa looked into Ryan's eyes, hoping to see a way to stop him. Nothing was held there.
"Marissa..." Ryan hated looking into her eyes. They made him remember everything.
"What?" Marissa didn't know what she expected to hear.
"I can't stay," Not that.
"Why? Everything'll figure itself out," She was gonna fight for him.
"I don't think it will," Ryan said his doubts. He didn't want to see the Cohens. He hurt them.
"Yes it will. The Cohens aren't gonna kick you out. If they were, why would they be searching for you all day? Seth was the one who called me and told me you were gone. He felt bad for what he said," Marissa attempted and Ryan took a moment to think before answering.
"If I do stay, I'm gonna have to go see a shrink or even have to go to Willow Creek. I told them I didn't mind going, but I do. I don't want to go through it again," Ryan commented.
"Then don't. Tell them you won't go," Marissa didn't want another of her friends in Willow Creek.
"I'm gonna have to. Withdraw's a bastard," Ryan knew he'd have to go through it again.
"I know," Marissa had to go through it with drinking.
"It's worse for drugs than drinking," Ryan could tell she was stopping drinking.
"Are you sure? Doesn't it depend on time?" Marissa asked him.
"I don't know, but I've been doing it a lot over these three weeks," Ryan commented. He'd been using a lot.
"Yeah. But we'll help you. Will you stay?" Marissa looked at his bruised eye with dried blood around the cut he got from Seth.
"I don't know. I got too comfortable here," Ryan couldn't decide if he wanted to stay. He didn't want to go through everything he would with the Cohens.
"Is that why you did drugs?" Ryan noticed Marissa put it in past tense. Was Ryan done with it? Would he stop?
"Maybe. I have no clue," Ryan felt so strange talking about it with Marissa. He wasn't near the person who dated her a year ago. Neither was she. "I think I should go."
"No one wants you to go. The Cohens and me will help you. Please don't go," Marissa couldn't stand it if he left.
"Marissa, I got too comfortable here. It's not me," Ryan objected.
"But..." Marissa felt a tear run down her face.
"I'm sorry, Marissa," The bus engine roared and Ryan began to walk away.
Marissa felt more tears fall. She never turned away from him, but he did to her. She was losing him.
"Ryan, stop!" She screamed after him, and he kept going. "Please stop!" Marissa was breaking down, Ryan could hear it in her voice.
"What?" He paused and turned. He saw her falling apart. Why couldn't she just let him go? Marissa was making this difficult.
"I love you Ryan," Marissa told him. She told him this not that long ago in the hospital and she knew he hadn't felt the same way. Did he now? She would try anything to keep him from leaving.
Ryan didn't move. She had just made it even more difficult. He didn't know if he could leave. Ryan did want to stay, but everything had just made it hard. He hurt too many people already.
Ryan was hurting them more by leaving.
"Don't go. Please," Marissa begged of him. The bus was ready to go. Ryan had to make a decision. Could he do it? For a while, Ryan knew he felt different about Marissa, something he hadn't felt in a while.
Ryan couldn't do it. He couldn't leave. It was too hard. He'd been through too much already here to leave. He'd deal with everything here. He didn't want to, but he knew he didn't want leave more.
He walked to the broken down Marissa and stared at her.
"I love you too," Ryan told her and kissed her.
"Does that mean you're gonna stay?" Marissa asked him after they broke apart.
"Yeah."
0000000000
Kirsten felt sick. They still hadn't found Ryan, and it had been hours. Seth and her were still driving around, and Seth was falling asleep.
Marissa and Ryan were unfortunately at her mother's house. Jimmy didn't want Marissa to go to his house. So Marissa snuck Ryan up the stairs. They couldn't let Julie see Ryan, or he would be all the gossip tomorrow.
"So will you go back?" Marissa asked Ryan, who was lying on her bed. He was refusing to go back to the Cohens.
"Not yet. I'm waiting til they calm down," Ryan tried to stop his hand from shaking.
"Ryan, they're worried sick about you. You have to talk to them," Marissa was incredibly glad Ryan was staying, but what he was doing now was stupid. "Will you at least talk to Seth?"
"If he wants to talk to me," Ryan would never have guessed this was where he would be this morning.
"He probably does. Let me call him," Marissa pulled out her cell phone and left the room. She didn't exactly know why she did that, but oh well.
Seth's cell phone rang and he shot awake. When had he fallen asleep? Kirsten glanced at him, hoping it was Ryan on the other line.
"Hello?" Seth didn't even look at who it was.
"Hey Seth," Marissa began to absentmindedly walk around.
"Oh hey Marissa," Kirsten was slightly sad it was Marissa.
"Listen, Seth, I found Ryan," Marissa made sure her mother wasn't around to hear.
"Really?" Seth breathed a sigh of relief. Marissa found his brother. He knew she would.
"Yeah, except he is refusing to go back to your house," Marissa told him and she spotted her mother. She walked farther away.
"Why?" Kirsten was desperate to hear the whole conversation. She wanted to know if Ryan was found.
"He thinks it'll be easier to talk to your parents when they've calmed down," Marissa kept walking around.
"But they're not gonna. That's stupid," Seth didn't understand what Ryan was thinking. The drugs were getting to him.
"I know that, but Ryan's not in the best mental state right now. With the withdraw and everything," Marissa was careful not to be around anyone when she said that.
"Right. Gotcha," Seth agreed.
"So I asked him if he would talk to you and he said that's cool. Could you come over to my mom's...you granddad's?" Marissa knew that sounded weird.
"Um, I'm with my mom..." Seth could bet Kirsten would want to come with.
"Oh," Marissa saw the problem.
"I'll be there soon. I'll talk to her," Seth had to talk to Ryan.
"Are you sure?" Marissa asked.
"Yeah, I'll see you in a few. Bye," Seth hung up and looked at his mom, who was going insane.
"What'd Marissa say?" Kirsten yelled at her son, surprised by the urgency in her tone. But she had to know if Ryan was okay.
"Um, she found Ryan," Seth started.
"Oh thank God," Marissa was a savior to Kirsten. She didn't know if she could keep going.
"Yeah, she wants me to go over to Granddad's house. Is that all right?" Seth didn't want to say Ryan was there. "You know, if I can borrow the car to go over?"
"Uh, yeah. I'll drive home," Kirsten felt like she was missing something. She drove back to their house in utter confusion. "Be careful," She warned as Seth jumped into the driver's seat.
"I will," Seth drove away. He could pretty much understand why Ryan didn't want to come back. But he definitely had to talk to him. Seth felt horrible for punching Ryan. He barely ever threw a punch, and when he did, he hit his brother.
Seth never was at his granddad's, so he had to call his mom for directions. Once he finally knew where he was going, he headed to the huge mansion. Strangely, it wasn't that far away. Or Seth just hadn't paid attention to time.
He got out of the car, and stared up at the house. Damn, it was huge. There was no end to it. Seth walked up to the door and knocked on it.
"Hi Seth!" Julie opened the door and pulled him into a hug.
"Hi, Mrs. Cooper-Nichol," Seth couldn't believe this was his grandmother.
"Oh Seth, you can call me grandma even though I don't look like one. How about we call me Aunt Julie? I mean, me and Marissa are like sisters," Julie smiled evilly.
"Right. Can I go see Marissa?" Seth was really uncomfortable around Julie.
"Are you okay Seth? It's great to see you awake. I visited every week you know," Julie lied.
"Uh-huh..." Seth really wanted to leave. He didn't believe a word Julie was saying.
"I know it's rough to go through this. But you can always talk to me," Julie looked at Seth with fake concern.
"You know, I'll go find Marissa's room myself. But Mrs. Cooper-Nichol..." Seth began up the stairs.
"It's Aunt Julie!" She called after him. He walked away from her, glad to be out of Julie Cooper's clutches.
"Seth?" Marissa found her step-nephew wandering around the upstairs of the house aimlessly.
"Good, found you. I was sick of being near your mom," Seth commented.
"Oh. I was hoping Kaitlin would find you," The two began to head to Marissa's room.
"Is he in there?" Seth asked when they stopped at a closed door.
"Yep," Marissa opened it and walked in. "Look who I found, Ry," Ryan sat up to see Seth.
"Hey Ryan," Seth was not near ready for the awkwardness that welcomed him
"Hey," Ryan barely mutter. Why had he said this was okay? It wasn't, Ryan just wanted to sleep.
"Sorry about the shiner," The two brothers felt like strangers to each other.
"It's fine," Ryan blew it off.
"Not really. I really flipped out on you. And I'm sorry man. I didn't mean it," Seth didn't mean to do those things now. When he said all that stuff, he had.
"It's fine, Seth," Ryan didn't want to be having this conversation with Seth.
"No, it's not. I said a lot of crappy stuff, and I'm sorry," Seth couldn't understand what was going on with Ryan.
"Don't apologize," Ryan didn't look at Seth, who was getting annoyed.
"Why not?" He shot. Marissa realized this might be a while, so she sat down at her desk.
"Because everything you said was true," Ryan answered strongly.
"No, it wasn't. Dude, I don't know why you did drugs, but I said some mean stuff you didn't deserve. So can you forgive me?" Seth asked.
"I was never mad at you," Ryan finally opened up. He knew the confrontation with Seth would be easier than with Kirsten and Sandy.
"Cool. So, are you gonna come back?" Seth prayed he would.
"Not yet," Ryan answered.
"Dude, you have to. Or I'm not gonna go back. I can promise you my parents will not kick you out, they're way too worried. I'm afraid for my life if I don't come back with you. So please, come,"Seth begged.
"It won't be as bad as you think," Marissa added. Ryan looked between the both. He did want to go back. The Cohens weren't his old parents. The parents who didn't give a shit about him. Kirsten most certainly wasn't Dawn, the drunk.
"Fine," He said after a few moments of thinking. He was already leaning on going with Seth.
"You just saved both our asses. My mom was insane in the car ride looking for you. I swear, I could've died," Seth joked as Ryan stood up. Marissa made sure Julie wasn't around and all three of them went down to the door. Seth left first and Marissa stopped Ryan.
"Call me tomorrow," She was so glad everything would work out. "Bye," Marissa kissed him.
Seth felt a little out of the loop as he watched Marissa and Ryan. Ryan walked away from his girlfriend and into the Range Rover.
"So, I totally missed something," Seth said as they drove away from the Nichol mansion.
"What do you mean?" You could tell Seth and Ryan were brothers again.
"That kiss, dude! You and Marissa, what's up?" Seth was happy Ryan wasn't holding a grudge against him. If he were in Ryan's shoes, he'd be pissed. But Seth wasn't Ryan, thank God.
"I guess we're together," Ryan supposed that. They had said they loved each other, and they kissed. Twice. That constituted as dating, right?
"How long do you think it'll last this time?" Seth knew Ryan and Marissa's dating record. It wasn't that great. But Seth had to admit, they were cute together. That's why he had tried to hook them up earlier in the month.
"Most likely longer than the last time," Ryan counted how many times he and Marissa attempted at being a couple. They were up to three.
"That was..." It had been a while since they dated. At least to Seth.
"Not even a day," Ryan remembered the numerous fights that day.
"Wait, I thought the last time you guys dated was when you left for Chino?" Seth hated missing such a long time. Comas sucked.
"No, we tried after you uh, um jumped," Now Seth was madder. He wasn't even in the coma when that occurred. Damn it.
"How'd that end?" Seth was at least a little glad that that time was done and over with.
"She told Summer about you, I flipped out and took a bus and walked home," Ryan was glad too.
"I can't believe you never said anything about that," Seth commented.
"You do remember what was happening then?" Ryan gained some of his sense of humor abck.
"Right," Seth let a little bit of silence come over them as he began to think. Everything would work out. Maybe they could be happy for once. "You know, this feels very much like a happy ending. You and Marissa back together. Me and Summer, still together."
"Except I could be kicked out of your house and Summer is still in the hospital," ryan pointed out.
"Now why did you have to ixnay the happy ending?" Seth accused.
"I didn't ixnay the happy ending," Ryan didn't understand.
"Yes you did. You brought down the mood, ruined the moment, everything," Seth rambled.
"No I didn't. There wasn't even a moment there," Ryan argued.
"There could've been...My point is, we're on smooth sailing, and you're putting rough waves in the water," Seth said.
"Smooth sailing? Summer still has to get out of the hospital, and I have to go through withdraw. Again," Ryan told him.
"More waves!" Seth exclaimed.
"What's your obsession with waves and sailing? Didn't you get over that last summer?" Ryan wondered.
"I don't know. Can I please my happy ending?" Ryan glared at his brother. "Okay, how about a happy pause? You know, a break from the drama and intensity of everything," Seth explained.
"Whatever," Ryan gave in.
"See? It wasn't that hard," Seth commented as he turned on the music player and the end of a song blared at them.
I guess that's the way the story goes,
Will it ever make sense?
Somebody's got to know.
There's got to be more to life than this,
There's got to be more to everything,
I thought exists.
We are, we are the Youth of The Nation. . .
So? What did you all think? I can't believe number 2 in the saga is over. If you guys hated the end, oh well. I mean, didn't I leave it quite open for the sequel? Yes, a sequel. It is currently in the works. First, I need some chapter titles, and a title for the whole thing. I've got some ideas. The Nation's Forgotten Youth? No, that's lame.
So, here are some things to the people who made this possible. Hey, maybe your name will be here:
Kim: Of course you get the first little shout out. I doubt you'll read this, but you gave me ideas for this, and made me write in Stranded Memories.
Kitotterkat: You helped me through this, and I must say your reviews were great. I needed some constructive criticism...hehe.
Svocfanatic: You are one of the only people who like reviewed every chapter. Thank you so much for that, you kept me writing! You really did. If I didn't have reviewers like you, I don't think this would've been finished.
Now who else to comment to? There is waaaaay too many! I wish I could tell you each something, but I can't. There is a ton. So, instead, I will list off only a few of the people. But don't worry, if I could list everyone, I would.
Fiona
Leentje
i-luv-the-oc-and-smallville
adamismine69 (where did you go? I miss you so much!)
Mrs.AdamBrody
adambrody10
alexis(holy crap, that's my name too!)
Mikelucas1
McLerran
benshott
oc.i.luv.u.
Agel15
theoclovestheoc
DSmooth321
DeeCohan
Meggy in Orange County
sUmMeRiTh
OthfanAnna
auggy1984
bobbosback
IY-ROX
Jessica
aaron
Silver Eyed
music4mysoul
That is all for my people. I know there is a TON more, but everyone, I repeat everyone please review at the end of this, because the more reviews, the faster I am to typing up the sequel!
Ali
