Chapter 1
The year is eighteen eighty-three, two years since Christine left me. I have not gotten over her but I have accepted life as it is and as, I am sure, it always will be... me alone with my music, and my memories here below the ground in my private world of darkness.
I only venture up to the surface once a month to collect my salary and get any supplies I may need for the month. This is done at night so as to avoid having to deal with people and tonight is that night.
It is the middle of winter and here I am crossing a smooth lake in my little boat, dressed in my warmest cloak and my felt hat wondering why I even bother. It would be so easy to just fall into that cold, black water and end it all right now. But, even as a young boy I could not bring myself to end this misery called life for some unknown force seems to always pull me back from the edge of despair.
So, on I go across the lake and up to box five to collect my salary. It is dark but I can see it there on the shelf as always along with the program for the upcoming opera. I do not know why Madame Giry bothers leaving a program. She knows I do not come to watch the operas anymore. I suppose she hopes that I will one day change my mind but I never will, I do not even bother to attend auditions or rehearsals. I pick up the envelope that contains my salary and leave a present for her in its place. She just loves those little chocolates.
As I walk out of box five I decide to head out to do a little shopping. I could use a bit of fresh air anyway. I do not know why I am thinking of fresh air now when only a half an hour ago I was thinking of no air at all at the bottom of the lake. But, this is how my mind works, morbid one moment and hopeful the next, therefore, down to the streets of Paris I go.
It is rather cold and very windy tonight. I am almost out of paper therefore my first stop is a little music shop. Getting in is not a problem the lock is rather simple and very easy to open. I make my selections and leave some money on the counter before leaving, locking the door behind me. As I continue on my way, I notice that it has started to snow lightly.
After getting everything I need for the month I decide to go home from the Rue Scribe entrance since it is much closer and the light snow that began falling earlier is threatening to become a full blown blizzard.
As I draw close to the entrance I see a movement a short distance down the alley that catches my eye. As I move closer to see through the snow I see two men beating a woman who is on her knees clinging to a small bundle. If there is one thing I cannot stand it is watching a woman being beaten.
I quickly abandon my supplies and hurry to her aid. I notice that she is barely conscious as she sways beneath the beating the two men are giving her.
As I move closer while removing my Punjab lasso from inside my cloak, the woman glances at me for a moment and says in a weak voice, "Erik, I knew you would save me."
How did she know my name? Could it possibly be Christine? No, that was not her voice that spoke my name. But if not Christine then who?
Her words cause the man closest to me to turn from her and, pushing these thoughts aside, I quickly deal with him, tightening my lasso around his neck until he collapses lifeless to the ground. Loosening my lasso I make sure the man is dead. Unfortunately, while taking care of him the other man gets one final blow in which causes the woman to lose consciousness completely and slump to the ground.
As she falls, the bundle she has been clinging to so tightly falls along side her landing with a soft thump on the new fallen snow. I think nothing of this as I swiftly take care of the man who has dealt the woman this last hit. I then proceed to move the men to a more secluded place where they will not be found for quite some time.
When I get back to where the woman still lies unconscious I quickly kneel at her side and feel for a pulse. There is one but it is very weak. I know that she will not survive out here on a night like tonight. I cannot just leave her here to freeze to death... I am not that kind of a monster. I know I have no choice but to take her home with me to see her back to health. But, I vow to myself, as soon as she is well enough I will wash my hands of her.
As I move to take her into my arms I notice the small bundle she had been clutching so tightly wiggle a little. Curious, I lay her back down very gently and move to the other side of her to kneel next to the little bundle, which is now wiggling even more than it had moments before. Cautiously, I open the cover and am surprised to see a pair of bright, blue eyes staring at me. I know that both mother and child cannot survive much longer out in this wretched weather so I quickly scoop up the baby and woman and hurry to the gate.
Once inside, I activate the mechanism that will bring the boat from the dock I left it at in the fifth cellar to where I am now. Once it arrives I settle the woman and child into the boat and quickly return for my supplies.
The woman is still unconscious when I return a short time later. I load my supplies into the boat and move it back across the lake to my home.
As soon as the boat is docked in front of the house I scoop up the woman and child and hurry inside where it is warmer. I take them to the room where Christine had stayed and lay them on the bed. Quickly, I light the gas lanterns and some candles to afford me more light so I can examine their condition.
I feel for the woman's pulse again to see if she has gotten any worse. Luckily her pulse feels a bit stronger than earlier but she still shows no signs of regaining consciousness any time soon. I see nothing immediately life threatening, therefore, I cover her with a quilt to help warm her up before moving on to the child. Once I get the baby taken care of I will have plenty of time to go back to care for the woman's injuries.
I open the cover, which has hid the baby's face from the cold wind outside, and those bright blue eyes are staring at me again. I gently reach down and pick the baby up so I can get a better look to make sure that the child is not injured.
Once removed from the sack I am finally afforded a good look at the child. I will have to say that he is no more than a month old and well fed. His blue clothes look like they have seen better days but he seems happy all the same. Upon a closer examination I am pleased to find no injuries.
Satisfied that the baby is perfectly healthy I have to figure out what to do with him. I cannot let him lying on the floor to catch cold and it is not safe to lay him on the bed for he might roll off. Then I remember the crib I had brought from my mother's house and put in the storage room.
I carefully lay the baby down next to his mother on the bed. I will not be gone for more than a few moments so I am fairly confident that he will be safe until I return. I tuck a pillow next to him just to be safe though.
Upon my return with the crib I notice that neither baby nor mother has moved the least bit. I quickly dust off the crib and get it ready for the baby. He will be safe and warm in it. I should know... after all it was my crib.
Once the baby is safely tucked in I return to the bed to check on his mother. She has not moved a muscle the whole time I was caring for the child. Her pulse is feeling stronger and the bruises on her face are becoming more visible. I gently pull the quilt off of her so I can care for her injuries.
She is painfully thin and it looks to me like she has been living on the streets with the baby. Her clothes are torn in several places and I can see blood showing through in spots as well as a gash on the left side of her forehead near the hairline. These are the injuries that need immediate attention.
I press on her abdomen in several places to be sure that there is no internal bleeding. It is soft which reassures me that her injuries are not life threatening. I quickly get a basin and fill it with warm water. Dipping a cloth in the water I begin to clean the cut on her brow.
She does not stir as I clean her face. The cut on her forehead is deep and will need to be stitched up. I leave the room to gather the items I will need to close the cut and quickly return to her side.
I hold the needle over the flame of a nearby candle to sterilize it. Once it cools I began to carefully close the cut. The woman does not even flinch while I stitch the gash even though I have not put anything on the cut to numb it.
After finishing the last stitch I examine my handiwork and am fairly confidant that there will only be a small scar which will be easily hidden by her hair. As I examine the bruises on her face I notice that she is rather lovely now that her face has been washed clean of dirt and blood.
Satisfied that there are no more cuts on her face I probe it gently to make sure that no bones were broken. Much to my relief, everything appears to be intact. Taking another look at the rest of her body I know that I have a lot of work ahead of me. Unfortunately, in order to care for those injuries I have no choice but to remove her soiled clothing so I can care for the wounds that lie beneath.
Knowing what must be done, I find a clean sheet to cover her with and begin the process of removing her clothing. Once again I cannot help but notice how painfully thin she is. She looks so frail lying there and I cannot help but wonder how she could survive the beating she received at the hands of those two men.
Suddenly needing to be reassured that she will survive this, I quickly feel for her pulse again. Much to my relief, it is much stronger than it had been and I am sure that she will make it. Why, I wonder, am I suddenly so concerned about her welfare? It is for the baby's sake, I tell myself as I begin to care for her wounds once more.
Lifting the sheet a bit, I can see that her arms and sides are covered with purplish bruises. Some places have been hit so hard that the skin has been broken. Rolling her over slightly I see that her back has suffered the most, having used herself to shield the baby. It is a good thing this poor girl is unconscious for I doubt she would be able to stand the pain otherwise.
As I work steadily at cleaning and dressing her wounds I let my mind wander. What had she meant when she looked at me and called me by name saying that she knew I would save her. How did she know my name? It must have been a mistake for there is no way she could have known me. I have never seen her before in my life. My ears must have deceived me. Perhaps it was just the wind I had heard and not her at all. Pushing that thought from my mind I change the direction of my thoughts. What was a young girl doing on the streets with a baby? Why were those two men beating her so?... It is not like she had anything of any value besides the baby and I am sure that that is not what they were after. What am I going to do with a woman and a small baby? How am I going to know what to do with the baby if she does not wake up? What will she think when she wakes up and realizes that she has been undressed by the hands of a monster? Oh, how lovely she is lying there peacefully. Her skin is so soft and it would be so easy to caress her bare flesh without her even knowing it...
What am I doing thinking like this! I do not love this woman! I do not even know this woman! I have never taken advantage of a woman in my entire life and I am not about to start now!
Dressing the last cut I quickly cover her with the sheet again before going to look for something more appropriate for her to wear. I cannot bear the thought of putting her dirty, bloody clothes back on her.
I go to the armoire and search through the many garments hanging there. There is what I was looking for... a soft cotton nightgown trimmed with lace around the neck. It should fit her perfectly. Getting it on her is going to be the hard part. Undressing her had been easy enough... a pair of scissors had done the trick nicely. I cannot help but smile at that last thought.
As I gently lift her into a sitting position the sheet falls away from her and now that her wounds are cleaned and dressed I cannot help but glance at her naked form one last time. She is very lovely indeed.
Quickly changing the direction of my thoughts I manage to get the nightgown over her head and onto her arms. Once this task is accomplished I pull it down over her rather hesitantly. I cannot help but imagine lying next to her, holding her in my arms. I blame these strange thoughts on the fact that this is the first time I have ever seen a woman naked.
Quickly pushing these thoughts aside once again, I gently lower her back down onto the bed. As her bruised and battered back makes contact with the soft mattress a soft moan escapes her lips. I am relieved to hear even this faint moan since it is a sign that she is slowly coming out of her deep state of unconsciousness.
I gently pull the quilt up over her and leave the room. She should be waking soon and she is going to need something for the pain. Looking through the different bottles I have, I make a few selections and go about mixing her an elixir that will help to ease the pain. To finish it off, I add a touch of honey to make it taste less bitter... she may not drink it otherwise.
Sure that she will be waking soon, I hurriedly return to her room and prepare to wait indefinitely for her to stir. As I enter the room, I glance towards the crib and see those bright blue eyes watching me. I suddenly realize that he has not made a sound the whole time... not even when he landed soundly in the soft snow.
This did not seem like the normal behavior of a baby. Curious about this, I set the drink down on a nearby stand and take the two steps that will bring me to his side. While doing so, I notice that he is still watching me intently. He seems to be very alert for a child his age, but then I do not know a great deal about such things. What surprises me is the fact that as I lean over the crib he reaches up towards me as if wanting to be picked up. Remembering the lack of contact when I was his age I cautiously reach down and pick him up... after all, who am I to deny him what I never had. As I do so, he gives a squeal of delight and actually smiles at me.
I carry him over to the bed and sit down on the edge glancing at the woman lying there. In the short time I was gone she has not moved. I gently touch the back of my hand to her forehead to make sure that she does not have a fever. Much to my relief, I find that her forehead is cool to the touch. As I remove my hand from her face she lets out a soft moan.
"Your mother will be fine," I say softly. Upon saying this she starts to stir a bit as if reacting to the sound of my voice.
Upon this realization I think of a song I had written long ago which remains unfinished. Perhaps by singing to her, it will help to bring her out of this unconscious state more quickly. With this in mind I begin to sing...
"Can you ever love me
the way that I love you?
Will you ever need me
The way that I need you.
Will you ever see me
for who I really am?
Will you look beyond my face
and see that I am just a man.
I can be as ferocious as a lion
yet as gentle as a lamb,
But I would never hurt you.
Oh, if you'd just take my hand..."
As those last words escape my lips her eyelashes begin to flutter open and she leaves out a soft moan. As her eyes focus on her surroundings she suddenly looks very frightened. I am guessing that she is remembering what happened earlier and unthinkingly I place a hand on her arm to comfort her.
"You are safe now," I say. "I will not harm you nor will I allow anyone else to do so. You have been through a great deal tonight and you need to rest. As you can see your son is safe and unharmed."
Not seeming to think anything of the mask, she reaches up to touch my hand and says in a weak voice, "Thank you for saving us. I owe you my life."
"Think nothing of it," I reply. "How am I to care for your son if he gets hungry and you are unconscious?"
"He is not my son, he is my brother." This thought seems to pain her deeply, as she looks away from me. Regaining her composure after a moment she looks at me and says, "If he gets hungry there is a bottle in the bag, just warm some milk."
I nod my head in acknowledgment then remembering the elixir that I mixed for her earlier I quickly retrieve it from the little stand I had sat it on. Returning to her side I say, "I am sure that you are in a great deal of pain. I have made you something that will give you some relief."
She accepts it unquestioningly as I hold it out to her. "Thank you," she replies as she takes it from me and drinks it quickly.
Wondering just what happened to her tonight I cannot help but ask her a question that has been at the back of my mind since she woke up with that frightened look on her face. "Do you remember what happened to you tonight?" I ask.
"Yes," she says in a very small voice. "I was attacked by two men... they were going to rape me then kill me... they said so themselves."
"You never have to fear those men again," I reply quickly wishing I had not brought it up, bringing that terrified look to her face as she remembered what had happened.
As I look at her I notice that she has a puzzled look on her face as she looks at her arm which is clad in the soft white sleeve of the nightgown. Knowing that I have to explain how she came to wear this garment I prepare myself for the horrified look I am sure she will soon be wearing at the realization that she had been undressed by a monster. Bracing myself I say, "I am sorry but you were badly injured and I had no choice but to remove your clothes so that I could tend to your wounds."
As the full meaning of this sinks in, her face turns bright red as she looks away from me in embarrassment. Wondering why she is not horrified by this admission but embarrassed instead I place a finger under her chin to make her look me in the eye. Upon doing this, I realize that she has the same bright blue eyes as her brother.
"I apologize, I did not mean to embarrass you," I say softly. "I will leave you now to rest. If you need anything do not hesitate to call for me. Your forehead may hurt but please try not to touch it, I had to stitch a deep cut."
As I get up to leave the room she quickly grabs my hand and holds me back. "Thank you for taking such good care of me. I don't know how I will ever repay you."
"Your thanks is payment enough," I reassure her. "Rest now and I will bring you something to eat later."
"What am I to call you?" she asks as I place her now sleeping brother into the crib.
"My name is Erik," I reply, slightly taken aback by this question. Pushing it aside I continue. "And what am I to call you and your brother?"
"My name is Marie and his name is Charles," she answered softly. "I really do appreciate all that you have done for us. I will be forever in your debt."
"Nonsense," I answer. "You owe me nothing. I am just glad that I could be of service. I do not want to hear another word about it. Rest now." I quickly leave the room and close the door behind me.
Once safely on the other side of the door I relax a bit as I realize just how tense I had been while sitting so close to her on the bed. I can still feel her hand on mine... the first gentle touch I have received in a very long time.
Suddenly realizing that I have no milk in the house for the baby I hurry to fetch some. I do not want to be gone for very long incase Marie or Charles need me. Marie, I repeat to myself, what a lovely name for such a lovely girl.
As I journey above the ground once more I cannot help but think about Marie. I must have been imagining things when I had thought she called me by name in the alley... if she had known she would not have asked me my name. What was she doing alone on the streets with her small brother? Where are their parents? Why was she not frightened of me? Why had she been embarrassed instead of frightened or angry that I had undressed her? What does she think of me and of the mask? Why is it that I seem to care? Not liking where these thoughts are going once again I quickly push them from my mind as I hurry back across the lake to my home.
Hurrying inside with the milk I quickly put it away and move down the hall to Marie's room. Gently tapping on the door I listen for any response that will indicate that Marie is awake. Not hearing anything I slowly open the door and cautiously look inside, not wishing to disturb her. Seeing that Marie is still sleeping I quietly enter the room and check on Charles. He is still asleep. It does not seem that I have been missed in the time I was gone and for this I am glad.
Walking over to the bed, I reach out a hand to gently brush a strand of hair from Marie's face. Upon this contact she stirs ever so slightly and I catch a smile grace her lips for a moment. She has such a beautiful smile. I could become lost in the feel of her soft skin beneath my fingers and the beauty of her smile. Why do I keep finding my thoughts taking this direction? Not wishing for them to stay where they are I push them aside yet again.
Realizing that she should be waking soon and knowing that she will most likely be hungry when she does, I leave the room to make her something to eat. She is too thin to go without food and while she is here she shall never be hungry.
Only a few minutes after preparing her a light meal of broth, toast, and tea I am sitting in my study wondering if I should go check on her again. Suddenly, I hear a scream coming from her room and quickly hurry to her side not bothering to knock on the door. The sight that greets me is one that makes my heart ache to take her into my arms and comfort her fears. But, I reason with myself, what makes you think that she would want your arms around her?
Not wasting time to think anymore about it, I gently reach out a hand to her arm like I had when she woke up earlier. "I am here," I say softly. "You are safe now. No one will hurt you here. I promise."
"I dreamed that they were after me again, but you weren't there to help me," she sobs but her trembling subsides at the mere contact of my hand on her arm.
"I am here now," I say soothingly. "They will never hurt you again. I promise." Not sure what to say now I reach into my pocket and hand her a handkerchief, hoping to change the subject. "Dry your eyes now. Are you hungry? I have made you something to eat."
"Thank you," she replies while wiping the tears from her eyes. "Now that you mention it I am rather hungry," she says with a shy smile.
"Good, I thought you might be," I reply, happy that she seems to have forgotten about the nightmare now. "Wait here, I shall be right back."
I hurry to the kitchen to get her tray ready and take it back to her room. Upon entering the room I see that while I was gone she has somehow managed to get herself into a sitting position on the bed. I carry the tray over to the bed and sit it across her lap. "Here you are," I say softly. "If you would like more please do not hesitate to ask, there is plenty more where this came from. I will leave you to eat now," I say as I turn to leave the room once again.
"Please stay, Erik," she calls after me. "I don't want to be alone right now." She turns her pleading bright blue eyes to me.
"If you wish," I say as I move to sit on the sofa along the far wall. Does she realize that she just asked a monster to sit with her? Does the mask not disturb her? Why does she not want to be alone... is she afraid of this room... of this house? Apparently, she is not afraid of me.
"Thank you for caring for my injuries. I'm sorry to have been so much trouble," she remarks after a long silence. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't happened along when you did."
"You are welcome and caring for you is no trouble at all," I reply sternly. "I just wish I would have been there sooner, before they hurt you so badly. No woman should have to endure such cruel treatment."
Just then Charles begins to cry. "I think he's hungry too," Marie remarks. "I'd better get him his bottle."
"I will take care of him," I say quickly as she tries to get out of bed. "You are weak and need to rest. Finish eating while I go warm him some milk."
"Thank you," she says as I reach into the bag and pull out a bottle. I nod in acknowledgement and hurry to warm some milk.
After making sure the milk is not too hot I fill the bottle and put the top back on it. As I enter the room, Charles sees me walking towards him and stops crying. I lean over the side of the crib and pick him up. He lets out a squeal of delight and smiles at me again. Figuring it would be best for his sister to feed him since I really do not know how to go about it, I carry him over to the bed and put him in Marie's outstretched arms. When she gets him situated I hand her his bottle and pick up the now empty tray relocating it to the bedside stand.
"He is such a sweet little boy," she remarks as he sucks greedily on the bottle. "Our parents would have been proud," she adds sadly.
"What happened to your parents, if you do not mind my asking? Surely they would not approve of you living on the streets with such a small child," I add without thinking.
"You're right, they wouldn't approve of the way we have to live," she states flatly. "But they're not here to make things the way they used to be. They had to go and get themselves killed and leave me to take care of Charles with nothing but the clothes on our backs," she spats angrily. Her anger quickly turns to tears and she turns away from my gaze ashamed at her outburst.
"Now, now, do not cry," I say moving to her side and laying a hand on her shoulder. "I do not condemn you for the way you were forced to live and I will do everything in my power to see that you never have to live that way again." Retrieving the handkerchief from before I hand it to her once again.
"Thank you," she sobs. "But I do not wish for us to be a burden to you. You were kind enough to save my life and dress my wounds. I cannot accept the generosity you are offering. It would be unfair for you to be made responsible for two people whom you are not even related to. Our relatives didn't want such a burden, why would you?"
Why indeed, I wonder to myself. "Hush, we will discuss this later. Right now you need your rest," I say to her while carefully taking Charles from her arms and placing the sleeping child back in the crib. Returning to her side I help her return to a lying position trying not to hurt her in the process.
"Thank you," she says once again turning her bright blue eyes to gaze at me. "I know you have done enough already but could you please sit with me until I fall asleep? Maybe it will help to keep the nightmares away."
"If you wish," I reply and move to sit on the sofa along the far wall.
Reaching out a hand to stop me, she smiles at me shyly. "I know it's childish of me to ask such a thing... after all, I'm sure that you have better things to do than baby-sit me but could you sit next to me instead of on the sofa? It was very comforting when I woke up the first time to the sound of you singing and knowing that you were right there to protect me."
Not being able to resist her pleading eyes I settle down next to her on the bed and take her hand in mine. "It is not childish to be frightened after being through what you just went through," I say reassuringly while patting her hand. "As for baby-sitting... the only one I am baby-sitting here is your brother and I can assure you that I really do not have anything better to do. Rest now... I will be right here."
"Thank you," she says as she looks at me drowsily. Within minutes she is sound asleep with a small smile on her face.
As soon as I am sure that she is not going to stir, I get up from the bed and quietly take the tray and the bottle into the kitchen. With the task of cleaning up accomplished, I then prepare something to help ease the pain and to help her sleep through the night. Once this is completed, I silently return to her side and resume my watch from the side of the bed.
As I sit here I let my mind wonder again. How did I get myself into this situation? I do not regret saving her life but her dependence on me is something I did not expect. I have never had anyone depend on me in my entire life and am quite unsure of what is expected of me. Every instinct in my body says to run and hide but I know that I cannot. Her waking with me by her side was comforting to her. A monster in a mask is a comfort? How this could be I do not think I will ever understand. Does the fact that I wear a mask not bother her at all? Has she not begun to wonder why this room has no windows? How had her parents been murdered and why did none of her relatives want to take her and her brother in?
As this last though crosses my mind she begins to stir. "Help me...," she breathes in her sleep as she tosses her head from side to side.
I quickly reach out a hand to calm her movements. "Do not be afraid... I am right here. They cannot hurt you anymore... I will not let them," I say softly as I lay my hand on her cheek. This seems to calm her and her look of fear turns to one of contentment. Moments later, she slowly opens her eyes and smiles up at me. Remembering that my hand is still resting lightly against her cheek I hastily remove it.
"Thank you for sitting with me," she says softly. "I started to have the nightmare again but you were there this time and made those men go away."
I sit here debating whether I should tell her what I had done to those two men or not. I know that if she knows that they are dead maybe she will stop having these nightmares. But, this also could cause her to fear me. The realization that I am actually worried of making her fear me is surprising, after all, I had expected her fear from the moment I brought her here... why would it matter so much now?
Deciding that I would rather take the chance of having her fear me instead of her being plagued by nightmares of the beating she received, I prepare myself to tell her. "When I say that those men will never hurt you again I mean it," I say very seriously. "Dead men cannot hurt you."
Not quite comprehending what I am saying she looks at me puzzled and says, "But how can you be sure that they are dead?"
Bracing myself against the fear my next words are going to bring I say very firmly, "I know for a fact that they are dead... they died by my hand." The look I had been bracing myself against never came, instead I am surprised to see a look of relief on her face.
"You killed them to save me?" she says with relief and awe in her voice. I nod my confirmation. "Thank you," is all she says as she lifts a hand to my cheek. Her touch is so gentle I feel as though I am in heaven.
"You are welcome," I say softly as I savor the feel of her small hand against my skin. "Maybe by knowing that they really can never hurt you again you will be able to sleep without nightmares."
"I hope that you are right," she says sadly as she lowers her hand to her side once again. "I had just gotten over having nightmares of my parents deaths."
Not knowing what to say to this, I say the only thing that comes to mind. "If you ever feel the need to talk about it I am here to listen. It sometimes helps to talk about such things."
"Thank you," she says sincerely, "I will remember that."
Remembering the elixir I had mixed earlier, I get it from the bedside stand and while handing it to her I say, "Here, drink this. It will help ease the pain and help you sleep through the night."
She takes it from me and drinks it without question. "Thank you," she says after a moment then remembering what I had said about sleeping through the night she asks, "Have I been out most of the day?"
"Yes, you have been," I reply. "But do not worry, it is quite normal to sleep this much when your body has been through what yours has." Seeing that she is once again becoming drowsy I ask, "Do you need me to sit with you tonight?"
"Could you please? Just until I fall asleep and then you can leave," she says softly.
"I will sit with you until you fall asleep. If you need me during the night do not hesitate to call for me," I say as I settle down on the side of the bed again.
"Thank you," she says. Closing her eyes she is soon asleep.
I sit by her side for a few more minutes looking at her lovely face and remembering the feel of her hand on my cheek. I glance over at the crib and see that Charles is awake and watching me with his bright blue eyes. Realizing that he will probably be hungry again soon and not wanting his cries to wake Marie I walk over to the crib and pick him up. Once again he gives a squeal of delight and smiles at me. I carry him down the hall to my room and place him in my bed while I return to Marie's room for the crib. I know that he will not fall out of my bed while I am gone... after all, it is quite hard to fall out of a coffin.
Once back in Marie's room I cannot help but linger a few moments to gaze at her sleeping face. I am just making sure that she is asleep, I tell myself, knowing full well that she has been and will be all night. Picking up the crib I carry it down the hall to my room and place Charles in it. Knowing he will be hungry soon I go to the kitchen to warm him some milk and as I return to my room he begins to cry. Taking the few steps that brings me to his side I pick him up and carry him over to a nearby chair. Once seated, I position him in my arms and give him his bottle like Marie had earlier. He sucks greedily on it as I watch.
As he sucks the last of the milk from the bottle I see that he is getting tired, as am I. Standing up, I carry him slowly back to the crib, humming to him softly. By the time I reach the side of the crib he is sleeping in my arms and I gently place him in the crib then take his bottle to the kitchen to be washed.
It has been a long day and upon returning to my room I prepare myself for bed, the need for sleep finally catching up to me.
The year is eighteen eighty-three, two years since Christine left me. I have not gotten over her but I have accepted life as it is and as, I am sure, it always will be... me alone with my music, and my memories here below the ground in my private world of darkness.
I only venture up to the surface once a month to collect my salary and get any supplies I may need for the month. This is done at night so as to avoid having to deal with people and tonight is that night.
It is the middle of winter and here I am crossing a smooth lake in my little boat, dressed in my warmest cloak and my felt hat wondering why I even bother. It would be so easy to just fall into that cold, black water and end it all right now. But, even as a young boy I could not bring myself to end this misery called life for some unknown force seems to always pull me back from the edge of despair.
So, on I go across the lake and up to box five to collect my salary. It is dark but I can see it there on the shelf as always along with the program for the upcoming opera. I do not know why Madame Giry bothers leaving a program. She knows I do not come to watch the operas anymore. I suppose she hopes that I will one day change my mind but I never will, I do not even bother to attend auditions or rehearsals. I pick up the envelope that contains my salary and leave a present for her in its place. She just loves those little chocolates.
As I walk out of box five I decide to head out to do a little shopping. I could use a bit of fresh air anyway. I do not know why I am thinking of fresh air now when only a half an hour ago I was thinking of no air at all at the bottom of the lake. But, this is how my mind works, morbid one moment and hopeful the next, therefore, down to the streets of Paris I go.
It is rather cold and very windy tonight. I am almost out of paper therefore my first stop is a little music shop. Getting in is not a problem the lock is rather simple and very easy to open. I make my selections and leave some money on the counter before leaving, locking the door behind me. As I continue on my way, I notice that it has started to snow lightly.
After getting everything I need for the month I decide to go home from the Rue Scribe entrance since it is much closer and the light snow that began falling earlier is threatening to become a full blown blizzard.
As I draw close to the entrance I see a movement a short distance down the alley that catches my eye. As I move closer to see through the snow I see two men beating a woman who is on her knees clinging to a small bundle. If there is one thing I cannot stand it is watching a woman being beaten.
I quickly abandon my supplies and hurry to her aid. I notice that she is barely conscious as she sways beneath the beating the two men are giving her.
As I move closer while removing my Punjab lasso from inside my cloak, the woman glances at me for a moment and says in a weak voice, "Erik, I knew you would save me."
How did she know my name? Could it possibly be Christine? No, that was not her voice that spoke my name. But if not Christine then who?
Her words cause the man closest to me to turn from her and, pushing these thoughts aside, I quickly deal with him, tightening my lasso around his neck until he collapses lifeless to the ground. Loosening my lasso I make sure the man is dead. Unfortunately, while taking care of him the other man gets one final blow in which causes the woman to lose consciousness completely and slump to the ground.
As she falls, the bundle she has been clinging to so tightly falls along side her landing with a soft thump on the new fallen snow. I think nothing of this as I swiftly take care of the man who has dealt the woman this last hit. I then proceed to move the men to a more secluded place where they will not be found for quite some time.
When I get back to where the woman still lies unconscious I quickly kneel at her side and feel for a pulse. There is one but it is very weak. I know that she will not survive out here on a night like tonight. I cannot just leave her here to freeze to death... I am not that kind of a monster. I know I have no choice but to take her home with me to see her back to health. But, I vow to myself, as soon as she is well enough I will wash my hands of her.
As I move to take her into my arms I notice the small bundle she had been clutching so tightly wiggle a little. Curious, I lay her back down very gently and move to the other side of her to kneel next to the little bundle, which is now wiggling even more than it had moments before. Cautiously, I open the cover and am surprised to see a pair of bright, blue eyes staring at me. I know that both mother and child cannot survive much longer out in this wretched weather so I quickly scoop up the baby and woman and hurry to the gate.
Once inside, I activate the mechanism that will bring the boat from the dock I left it at in the fifth cellar to where I am now. Once it arrives I settle the woman and child into the boat and quickly return for my supplies.
The woman is still unconscious when I return a short time later. I load my supplies into the boat and move it back across the lake to my home.
As soon as the boat is docked in front of the house I scoop up the woman and child and hurry inside where it is warmer. I take them to the room where Christine had stayed and lay them on the bed. Quickly, I light the gas lanterns and some candles to afford me more light so I can examine their condition.
I feel for the woman's pulse again to see if she has gotten any worse. Luckily her pulse feels a bit stronger than earlier but she still shows no signs of regaining consciousness any time soon. I see nothing immediately life threatening, therefore, I cover her with a quilt to help warm her up before moving on to the child. Once I get the baby taken care of I will have plenty of time to go back to care for the woman's injuries.
I open the cover, which has hid the baby's face from the cold wind outside, and those bright blue eyes are staring at me again. I gently reach down and pick the baby up so I can get a better look to make sure that the child is not injured.
Once removed from the sack I am finally afforded a good look at the child. I will have to say that he is no more than a month old and well fed. His blue clothes look like they have seen better days but he seems happy all the same. Upon a closer examination I am pleased to find no injuries.
Satisfied that the baby is perfectly healthy I have to figure out what to do with him. I cannot let him lying on the floor to catch cold and it is not safe to lay him on the bed for he might roll off. Then I remember the crib I had brought from my mother's house and put in the storage room.
I carefully lay the baby down next to his mother on the bed. I will not be gone for more than a few moments so I am fairly confident that he will be safe until I return. I tuck a pillow next to him just to be safe though.
Upon my return with the crib I notice that neither baby nor mother has moved the least bit. I quickly dust off the crib and get it ready for the baby. He will be safe and warm in it. I should know... after all it was my crib.
Once the baby is safely tucked in I return to the bed to check on his mother. She has not moved a muscle the whole time I was caring for the child. Her pulse is feeling stronger and the bruises on her face are becoming more visible. I gently pull the quilt off of her so I can care for her injuries.
She is painfully thin and it looks to me like she has been living on the streets with the baby. Her clothes are torn in several places and I can see blood showing through in spots as well as a gash on the left side of her forehead near the hairline. These are the injuries that need immediate attention.
I press on her abdomen in several places to be sure that there is no internal bleeding. It is soft which reassures me that her injuries are not life threatening. I quickly get a basin and fill it with warm water. Dipping a cloth in the water I begin to clean the cut on her brow.
She does not stir as I clean her face. The cut on her forehead is deep and will need to be stitched up. I leave the room to gather the items I will need to close the cut and quickly return to her side.
I hold the needle over the flame of a nearby candle to sterilize it. Once it cools I began to carefully close the cut. The woman does not even flinch while I stitch the gash even though I have not put anything on the cut to numb it.
After finishing the last stitch I examine my handiwork and am fairly confidant that there will only be a small scar which will be easily hidden by her hair. As I examine the bruises on her face I notice that she is rather lovely now that her face has been washed clean of dirt and blood.
Satisfied that there are no more cuts on her face I probe it gently to make sure that no bones were broken. Much to my relief, everything appears to be intact. Taking another look at the rest of her body I know that I have a lot of work ahead of me. Unfortunately, in order to care for those injuries I have no choice but to remove her soiled clothing so I can care for the wounds that lie beneath.
Knowing what must be done, I find a clean sheet to cover her with and begin the process of removing her clothing. Once again I cannot help but notice how painfully thin she is. She looks so frail lying there and I cannot help but wonder how she could survive the beating she received at the hands of those two men.
Suddenly needing to be reassured that she will survive this, I quickly feel for her pulse again. Much to my relief, it is much stronger than it had been and I am sure that she will make it. Why, I wonder, am I suddenly so concerned about her welfare? It is for the baby's sake, I tell myself as I begin to care for her wounds once more.
Lifting the sheet a bit, I can see that her arms and sides are covered with purplish bruises. Some places have been hit so hard that the skin has been broken. Rolling her over slightly I see that her back has suffered the most, having used herself to shield the baby. It is a good thing this poor girl is unconscious for I doubt she would be able to stand the pain otherwise.
As I work steadily at cleaning and dressing her wounds I let my mind wander. What had she meant when she looked at me and called me by name saying that she knew I would save her. How did she know my name? It must have been a mistake for there is no way she could have known me. I have never seen her before in my life. My ears must have deceived me. Perhaps it was just the wind I had heard and not her at all. Pushing that thought from my mind I change the direction of my thoughts. What was a young girl doing on the streets with a baby? Why were those two men beating her so?... It is not like she had anything of any value besides the baby and I am sure that that is not what they were after. What am I going to do with a woman and a small baby? How am I going to know what to do with the baby if she does not wake up? What will she think when she wakes up and realizes that she has been undressed by the hands of a monster? Oh, how lovely she is lying there peacefully. Her skin is so soft and it would be so easy to caress her bare flesh without her even knowing it...
What am I doing thinking like this! I do not love this woman! I do not even know this woman! I have never taken advantage of a woman in my entire life and I am not about to start now!
Dressing the last cut I quickly cover her with the sheet again before going to look for something more appropriate for her to wear. I cannot bear the thought of putting her dirty, bloody clothes back on her.
I go to the armoire and search through the many garments hanging there. There is what I was looking for... a soft cotton nightgown trimmed with lace around the neck. It should fit her perfectly. Getting it on her is going to be the hard part. Undressing her had been easy enough... a pair of scissors had done the trick nicely. I cannot help but smile at that last thought.
As I gently lift her into a sitting position the sheet falls away from her and now that her wounds are cleaned and dressed I cannot help but glance at her naked form one last time. She is very lovely indeed.
Quickly changing the direction of my thoughts I manage to get the nightgown over her head and onto her arms. Once this task is accomplished I pull it down over her rather hesitantly. I cannot help but imagine lying next to her, holding her in my arms. I blame these strange thoughts on the fact that this is the first time I have ever seen a woman naked.
Quickly pushing these thoughts aside once again, I gently lower her back down onto the bed. As her bruised and battered back makes contact with the soft mattress a soft moan escapes her lips. I am relieved to hear even this faint moan since it is a sign that she is slowly coming out of her deep state of unconsciousness.
I gently pull the quilt up over her and leave the room. She should be waking soon and she is going to need something for the pain. Looking through the different bottles I have, I make a few selections and go about mixing her an elixir that will help to ease the pain. To finish it off, I add a touch of honey to make it taste less bitter... she may not drink it otherwise.
Sure that she will be waking soon, I hurriedly return to her room and prepare to wait indefinitely for her to stir. As I enter the room, I glance towards the crib and see those bright blue eyes watching me. I suddenly realize that he has not made a sound the whole time... not even when he landed soundly in the soft snow.
This did not seem like the normal behavior of a baby. Curious about this, I set the drink down on a nearby stand and take the two steps that will bring me to his side. While doing so, I notice that he is still watching me intently. He seems to be very alert for a child his age, but then I do not know a great deal about such things. What surprises me is the fact that as I lean over the crib he reaches up towards me as if wanting to be picked up. Remembering the lack of contact when I was his age I cautiously reach down and pick him up... after all, who am I to deny him what I never had. As I do so, he gives a squeal of delight and actually smiles at me.
I carry him over to the bed and sit down on the edge glancing at the woman lying there. In the short time I was gone she has not moved. I gently touch the back of my hand to her forehead to make sure that she does not have a fever. Much to my relief, I find that her forehead is cool to the touch. As I remove my hand from her face she lets out a soft moan.
"Your mother will be fine," I say softly. Upon saying this she starts to stir a bit as if reacting to the sound of my voice.
Upon this realization I think of a song I had written long ago which remains unfinished. Perhaps by singing to her, it will help to bring her out of this unconscious state more quickly. With this in mind I begin to sing...
"Can you ever love me
the way that I love you?
Will you ever need me
The way that I need you.
Will you ever see me
for who I really am?
Will you look beyond my face
and see that I am just a man.
I can be as ferocious as a lion
yet as gentle as a lamb,
But I would never hurt you.
Oh, if you'd just take my hand..."
As those last words escape my lips her eyelashes begin to flutter open and she leaves out a soft moan. As her eyes focus on her surroundings she suddenly looks very frightened. I am guessing that she is remembering what happened earlier and unthinkingly I place a hand on her arm to comfort her.
"You are safe now," I say. "I will not harm you nor will I allow anyone else to do so. You have been through a great deal tonight and you need to rest. As you can see your son is safe and unharmed."
Not seeming to think anything of the mask, she reaches up to touch my hand and says in a weak voice, "Thank you for saving us. I owe you my life."
"Think nothing of it," I reply. "How am I to care for your son if he gets hungry and you are unconscious?"
"He is not my son, he is my brother." This thought seems to pain her deeply, as she looks away from me. Regaining her composure after a moment she looks at me and says, "If he gets hungry there is a bottle in the bag, just warm some milk."
I nod my head in acknowledgment then remembering the elixir that I mixed for her earlier I quickly retrieve it from the little stand I had sat it on. Returning to her side I say, "I am sure that you are in a great deal of pain. I have made you something that will give you some relief."
She accepts it unquestioningly as I hold it out to her. "Thank you," she replies as she takes it from me and drinks it quickly.
Wondering just what happened to her tonight I cannot help but ask her a question that has been at the back of my mind since she woke up with that frightened look on her face. "Do you remember what happened to you tonight?" I ask.
"Yes," she says in a very small voice. "I was attacked by two men... they were going to rape me then kill me... they said so themselves."
"You never have to fear those men again," I reply quickly wishing I had not brought it up, bringing that terrified look to her face as she remembered what had happened.
As I look at her I notice that she has a puzzled look on her face as she looks at her arm which is clad in the soft white sleeve of the nightgown. Knowing that I have to explain how she came to wear this garment I prepare myself for the horrified look I am sure she will soon be wearing at the realization that she had been undressed by a monster. Bracing myself I say, "I am sorry but you were badly injured and I had no choice but to remove your clothes so that I could tend to your wounds."
As the full meaning of this sinks in, her face turns bright red as she looks away from me in embarrassment. Wondering why she is not horrified by this admission but embarrassed instead I place a finger under her chin to make her look me in the eye. Upon doing this, I realize that she has the same bright blue eyes as her brother.
"I apologize, I did not mean to embarrass you," I say softly. "I will leave you now to rest. If you need anything do not hesitate to call for me. Your forehead may hurt but please try not to touch it, I had to stitch a deep cut."
As I get up to leave the room she quickly grabs my hand and holds me back. "Thank you for taking such good care of me. I don't know how I will ever repay you."
"Your thanks is payment enough," I reassure her. "Rest now and I will bring you something to eat later."
"What am I to call you?" she asks as I place her now sleeping brother into the crib.
"My name is Erik," I reply, slightly taken aback by this question. Pushing it aside I continue. "And what am I to call you and your brother?"
"My name is Marie and his name is Charles," she answered softly. "I really do appreciate all that you have done for us. I will be forever in your debt."
"Nonsense," I answer. "You owe me nothing. I am just glad that I could be of service. I do not want to hear another word about it. Rest now." I quickly leave the room and close the door behind me.
Once safely on the other side of the door I relax a bit as I realize just how tense I had been while sitting so close to her on the bed. I can still feel her hand on mine... the first gentle touch I have received in a very long time.
Suddenly realizing that I have no milk in the house for the baby I hurry to fetch some. I do not want to be gone for very long incase Marie or Charles need me. Marie, I repeat to myself, what a lovely name for such a lovely girl.
As I journey above the ground once more I cannot help but think about Marie. I must have been imagining things when I had thought she called me by name in the alley... if she had known she would not have asked me my name. What was she doing alone on the streets with her small brother? Where are their parents? Why was she not frightened of me? Why had she been embarrassed instead of frightened or angry that I had undressed her? What does she think of me and of the mask? Why is it that I seem to care? Not liking where these thoughts are going once again I quickly push them from my mind as I hurry back across the lake to my home.
Hurrying inside with the milk I quickly put it away and move down the hall to Marie's room. Gently tapping on the door I listen for any response that will indicate that Marie is awake. Not hearing anything I slowly open the door and cautiously look inside, not wishing to disturb her. Seeing that Marie is still sleeping I quietly enter the room and check on Charles. He is still asleep. It does not seem that I have been missed in the time I was gone and for this I am glad.
Walking over to the bed, I reach out a hand to gently brush a strand of hair from Marie's face. Upon this contact she stirs ever so slightly and I catch a smile grace her lips for a moment. She has such a beautiful smile. I could become lost in the feel of her soft skin beneath my fingers and the beauty of her smile. Why do I keep finding my thoughts taking this direction? Not wishing for them to stay where they are I push them aside yet again.
Realizing that she should be waking soon and knowing that she will most likely be hungry when she does, I leave the room to make her something to eat. She is too thin to go without food and while she is here she shall never be hungry.
Only a few minutes after preparing her a light meal of broth, toast, and tea I am sitting in my study wondering if I should go check on her again. Suddenly, I hear a scream coming from her room and quickly hurry to her side not bothering to knock on the door. The sight that greets me is one that makes my heart ache to take her into my arms and comfort her fears. But, I reason with myself, what makes you think that she would want your arms around her?
Not wasting time to think anymore about it, I gently reach out a hand to her arm like I had when she woke up earlier. "I am here," I say softly. "You are safe now. No one will hurt you here. I promise."
"I dreamed that they were after me again, but you weren't there to help me," she sobs but her trembling subsides at the mere contact of my hand on her arm.
"I am here now," I say soothingly. "They will never hurt you again. I promise." Not sure what to say now I reach into my pocket and hand her a handkerchief, hoping to change the subject. "Dry your eyes now. Are you hungry? I have made you something to eat."
"Thank you," she replies while wiping the tears from her eyes. "Now that you mention it I am rather hungry," she says with a shy smile.
"Good, I thought you might be," I reply, happy that she seems to have forgotten about the nightmare now. "Wait here, I shall be right back."
I hurry to the kitchen to get her tray ready and take it back to her room. Upon entering the room I see that while I was gone she has somehow managed to get herself into a sitting position on the bed. I carry the tray over to the bed and sit it across her lap. "Here you are," I say softly. "If you would like more please do not hesitate to ask, there is plenty more where this came from. I will leave you to eat now," I say as I turn to leave the room once again.
"Please stay, Erik," she calls after me. "I don't want to be alone right now." She turns her pleading bright blue eyes to me.
"If you wish," I say as I move to sit on the sofa along the far wall. Does she realize that she just asked a monster to sit with her? Does the mask not disturb her? Why does she not want to be alone... is she afraid of this room... of this house? Apparently, she is not afraid of me.
"Thank you for caring for my injuries. I'm sorry to have been so much trouble," she remarks after a long silence. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't happened along when you did."
"You are welcome and caring for you is no trouble at all," I reply sternly. "I just wish I would have been there sooner, before they hurt you so badly. No woman should have to endure such cruel treatment."
Just then Charles begins to cry. "I think he's hungry too," Marie remarks. "I'd better get him his bottle."
"I will take care of him," I say quickly as she tries to get out of bed. "You are weak and need to rest. Finish eating while I go warm him some milk."
"Thank you," she says as I reach into the bag and pull out a bottle. I nod in acknowledgement and hurry to warm some milk.
After making sure the milk is not too hot I fill the bottle and put the top back on it. As I enter the room, Charles sees me walking towards him and stops crying. I lean over the side of the crib and pick him up. He lets out a squeal of delight and smiles at me again. Figuring it would be best for his sister to feed him since I really do not know how to go about it, I carry him over to the bed and put him in Marie's outstretched arms. When she gets him situated I hand her his bottle and pick up the now empty tray relocating it to the bedside stand.
"He is such a sweet little boy," she remarks as he sucks greedily on the bottle. "Our parents would have been proud," she adds sadly.
"What happened to your parents, if you do not mind my asking? Surely they would not approve of you living on the streets with such a small child," I add without thinking.
"You're right, they wouldn't approve of the way we have to live," she states flatly. "But they're not here to make things the way they used to be. They had to go and get themselves killed and leave me to take care of Charles with nothing but the clothes on our backs," she spats angrily. Her anger quickly turns to tears and she turns away from my gaze ashamed at her outburst.
"Now, now, do not cry," I say moving to her side and laying a hand on her shoulder. "I do not condemn you for the way you were forced to live and I will do everything in my power to see that you never have to live that way again." Retrieving the handkerchief from before I hand it to her once again.
"Thank you," she sobs. "But I do not wish for us to be a burden to you. You were kind enough to save my life and dress my wounds. I cannot accept the generosity you are offering. It would be unfair for you to be made responsible for two people whom you are not even related to. Our relatives didn't want such a burden, why would you?"
Why indeed, I wonder to myself. "Hush, we will discuss this later. Right now you need your rest," I say to her while carefully taking Charles from her arms and placing the sleeping child back in the crib. Returning to her side I help her return to a lying position trying not to hurt her in the process.
"Thank you," she says once again turning her bright blue eyes to gaze at me. "I know you have done enough already but could you please sit with me until I fall asleep? Maybe it will help to keep the nightmares away."
"If you wish," I reply and move to sit on the sofa along the far wall.
Reaching out a hand to stop me, she smiles at me shyly. "I know it's childish of me to ask such a thing... after all, I'm sure that you have better things to do than baby-sit me but could you sit next to me instead of on the sofa? It was very comforting when I woke up the first time to the sound of you singing and knowing that you were right there to protect me."
Not being able to resist her pleading eyes I settle down next to her on the bed and take her hand in mine. "It is not childish to be frightened after being through what you just went through," I say reassuringly while patting her hand. "As for baby-sitting... the only one I am baby-sitting here is your brother and I can assure you that I really do not have anything better to do. Rest now... I will be right here."
"Thank you," she says as she looks at me drowsily. Within minutes she is sound asleep with a small smile on her face.
As soon as I am sure that she is not going to stir, I get up from the bed and quietly take the tray and the bottle into the kitchen. With the task of cleaning up accomplished, I then prepare something to help ease the pain and to help her sleep through the night. Once this is completed, I silently return to her side and resume my watch from the side of the bed.
As I sit here I let my mind wonder again. How did I get myself into this situation? I do not regret saving her life but her dependence on me is something I did not expect. I have never had anyone depend on me in my entire life and am quite unsure of what is expected of me. Every instinct in my body says to run and hide but I know that I cannot. Her waking with me by her side was comforting to her. A monster in a mask is a comfort? How this could be I do not think I will ever understand. Does the fact that I wear a mask not bother her at all? Has she not begun to wonder why this room has no windows? How had her parents been murdered and why did none of her relatives want to take her and her brother in?
As this last though crosses my mind she begins to stir. "Help me...," she breathes in her sleep as she tosses her head from side to side.
I quickly reach out a hand to calm her movements. "Do not be afraid... I am right here. They cannot hurt you anymore... I will not let them," I say softly as I lay my hand on her cheek. This seems to calm her and her look of fear turns to one of contentment. Moments later, she slowly opens her eyes and smiles up at me. Remembering that my hand is still resting lightly against her cheek I hastily remove it.
"Thank you for sitting with me," she says softly. "I started to have the nightmare again but you were there this time and made those men go away."
I sit here debating whether I should tell her what I had done to those two men or not. I know that if she knows that they are dead maybe she will stop having these nightmares. But, this also could cause her to fear me. The realization that I am actually worried of making her fear me is surprising, after all, I had expected her fear from the moment I brought her here... why would it matter so much now?
Deciding that I would rather take the chance of having her fear me instead of her being plagued by nightmares of the beating she received, I prepare myself to tell her. "When I say that those men will never hurt you again I mean it," I say very seriously. "Dead men cannot hurt you."
Not quite comprehending what I am saying she looks at me puzzled and says, "But how can you be sure that they are dead?"
Bracing myself against the fear my next words are going to bring I say very firmly, "I know for a fact that they are dead... they died by my hand." The look I had been bracing myself against never came, instead I am surprised to see a look of relief on her face.
"You killed them to save me?" she says with relief and awe in her voice. I nod my confirmation. "Thank you," is all she says as she lifts a hand to my cheek. Her touch is so gentle I feel as though I am in heaven.
"You are welcome," I say softly as I savor the feel of her small hand against my skin. "Maybe by knowing that they really can never hurt you again you will be able to sleep without nightmares."
"I hope that you are right," she says sadly as she lowers her hand to her side once again. "I had just gotten over having nightmares of my parents deaths."
Not knowing what to say to this, I say the only thing that comes to mind. "If you ever feel the need to talk about it I am here to listen. It sometimes helps to talk about such things."
"Thank you," she says sincerely, "I will remember that."
Remembering the elixir I had mixed earlier, I get it from the bedside stand and while handing it to her I say, "Here, drink this. It will help ease the pain and help you sleep through the night."
She takes it from me and drinks it without question. "Thank you," she says after a moment then remembering what I had said about sleeping through the night she asks, "Have I been out most of the day?"
"Yes, you have been," I reply. "But do not worry, it is quite normal to sleep this much when your body has been through what yours has." Seeing that she is once again becoming drowsy I ask, "Do you need me to sit with you tonight?"
"Could you please? Just until I fall asleep and then you can leave," she says softly.
"I will sit with you until you fall asleep. If you need me during the night do not hesitate to call for me," I say as I settle down on the side of the bed again.
"Thank you," she says. Closing her eyes she is soon asleep.
I sit by her side for a few more minutes looking at her lovely face and remembering the feel of her hand on my cheek. I glance over at the crib and see that Charles is awake and watching me with his bright blue eyes. Realizing that he will probably be hungry again soon and not wanting his cries to wake Marie I walk over to the crib and pick him up. Once again he gives a squeal of delight and smiles at me. I carry him down the hall to my room and place him in my bed while I return to Marie's room for the crib. I know that he will not fall out of my bed while I am gone... after all, it is quite hard to fall out of a coffin.
Once back in Marie's room I cannot help but linger a few moments to gaze at her sleeping face. I am just making sure that she is asleep, I tell myself, knowing full well that she has been and will be all night. Picking up the crib I carry it down the hall to my room and place Charles in it. Knowing he will be hungry soon I go to the kitchen to warm him some milk and as I return to my room he begins to cry. Taking the few steps that brings me to his side I pick him up and carry him over to a nearby chair. Once seated, I position him in my arms and give him his bottle like Marie had earlier. He sucks greedily on it as I watch.
As he sucks the last of the milk from the bottle I see that he is getting tired, as am I. Standing up, I carry him slowly back to the crib, humming to him softly. By the time I reach the side of the crib he is sleeping in my arms and I gently place him in the crib then take his bottle to the kitchen to be washed.
It has been a long day and upon returning to my room I prepare myself for bed, the need for sleep finally catching up to me.
