Someone to hold


Everytime I see them, romping around, giggling, shrieking laughter and hugging.

"Hey, naruto! wanna join a pillow fight? My team!"

Sakura proposed and continued to pummel gaara with a pillow.

"Yeah! Naruto! It'd be more fun! I'd finally be able to attack someone, and win!"

gaara chipped, letting temari, sakura andino bury him. Sasuke gave me a sheepish grin.

"Yeah! On my-"

"gaara's loosing team!"

sakura said, though it sounded more like a demand, And gave me a suspicious look.

His team.

I mentally ended sasuke's sentence.

I shook my head to decline. Saw the satisfied grin she gave me.

She smiled at him.

Love.

Joy.

Glee.


I scream inside.

sakura giggled and clung to sasuke like a leech. Temari andino did the same, though not quite as much as sakura.


Affection.


I want that too.

I want her emotions. I want to be expressive towards him.


Want, want, want!

naruto! Is that how a thing's supposed to think?

Hell, don't be selfish.

What about what they want?

Hmm?

Ever thought of that?

Do you honestly think that she was that kind? You must be insane. No one is that perfect. She's beautiful, intelligent, sweet and kind…… and possessive and flirty.

He's her boy… remember what she confessed?

To quote sakura's exact words…

"sasuke-kun, aishiteru!"

She said that. Her boy. Not yours.

Are you a fag or a man?

You sicken me.

And do you actually think they'd accpet you if allow your feelings to be known?

Stop dreaming thing. Be realistic. Your hope was broken once you were created.

And thank god for that.


"Shut up."

I muttered under my breath.

My demon was invading me again.


He turned and looked at me, a genuine smile plastered on his face.

"What was that naruto?"

I stared at him blankly. And gave him a fake smile.

"Nothing."

He looked away, disappointed.

"What's life without taking chances? naruto, be realistic, you want to have fun! God naruto. You're a teenager. Still a kid. The laugh line around your mouth's even gone. What happened?"

He said in a tone that only we 2 could hear, but firm enough to let me know he was upset.


And thank god..

God.

Thank god for once, she's not paying attention.


Funny. You and I sort of change positions. You always smile and make lame ass jokes now.

While I, on the other hand, stopped doing those shit.

"naruto, stop acting like this. I know you want to."

He whispered.

Ha. If you only knew sasuke. If you only felt.

"I am being realistic."

I said as cold as I could.


Their relationship wasn't as we expected. He was her possession now. And her property was off limits to every girl, strangely, sakura feels like I'm a girl too.

sasuke was more than being on a leash. He isn't even in a cage half his size.. They share the same room.

Share.


"Damn it."

I cursed and pivoted out of the room.

"I have to go."

I said and walked.


The water's so clear and cold.

naruto ironically smiled.

"Like me."

That thought didn't bother him at all.

His feet dipped in the water as she sat by the edge.

Tranquility.

"Ugh."

I've had enough of that.

he absent-mindedly rolled his eyes and turned his head to his right, to see a face.

naruto's breath was caught in his throat. His heart practically stopped. All the blood leaving him and joining the water.

"What you up to?"

He grinned and sat next to him.

You bastard! You have agility!

Unfortunately, naruto didn't.

And splashed.

"Ah!"

he sucked in breath as his body registered that the water was ice cold.

"You alright?"

He asked, joining him.

His eyes bulged incredulously, noticing their closeness.

"I love you."

He mouthed.

"No. You love sakura."

naruto hurt a bit as the words left her lips.

he backed away from him, glaring at him with his sky blue stone eyes.

"Get away before she kills me. And your jokes are worse than kakashi's."

he declared with a shaky voice.

His eyes were cold as he stared at the soaking wet sasuke in front of him.

He raised his hand to his neck, for a month now, he had that bandage around his neck for god-knows-what reasons, and pealed the bandage away.

"My god."

naruto let out.

His name. Naruto. His name was printed on sasuke's neck.

"naruto, I love you. Not sakura, I love no one else but you And I was a fool to look for someone who was already in front of me."

He paused and caressed naruto's freezing cheek.

"I love sakura, as a sister. I've tried explaining everything to her… but she won't listen."

There was irritation in his voice as he revealed more.

"naruto. Don't turn away from me this time. You said you weren't ready for a relationship when I first asked you.. It's been almost 3 years."

His voice etched with sorrow.

"I'm not ashamed of it."

"We were young. We still are."

naruto said defensively.

"But I know this is it. You're my-"

"Damn it sasuke! Stop fooling me! I can kill you if you continue!… please.."

he screamed the first words and ended up pleading. he turned away..

Again…

Ran.


God.

God.

God.

Are you there?

Yes.

Can you take me now?

No.

Why? Please, god, take me now. I don't care where I go. I'll leave it up to you.

Things will change naruto. Believe in me and in yourself.

God. Please. Please. Take me away.

Naruto, you're young. You've led a life unfulfilled. You can still make changes. You can still make hearts love you.

I don't want-nobody loves me. It's all a lie. I'm a lie.

Naruto, naruto, naruto, I love you. You're not a lie. You're a beautiful child, with eyes that reflect my kingdom. Hair that mirrors my son's crown. I love you.

You… love…

He loves you.

Me. Love… me.

Don't cry my child. My beautiful child.

Someone loves… me?

Yes.


"I'm not human

I'm barely alive

I'm here breathing,

Not wanting to survive

Shadows looming every part of me

Scarring myself permanently

Running from reality

Hurting instantly

Tears streaming

Almost breaking

Wanting, me wanting

Yearning, me yearning

For someone to hold,

Someone to keep

And to be always

In someone's arms when I sleep

Shadows looming every part of me

Scarring myself permanently

Running from reality

Hurting instantly……"

naruto took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Tears dripping on his pillow.

"I'm not human

I'm barely alive

I'm here breathing,

Not wanting to survive…"

naruto paused and whimpered the last words out..

"Wanting someone to hold…"

naruto's eyes fluttered as he gasped. Two arms held him, fitting perfectly as if he was molded for them.

Tears gushed even more.. Staining the flesh.

"I'll hold you."


Well? What do you think? Naruto's singing a song of mine heh here. It's short but i'll be uploading the 2nd chapter to this soon... After I've thought of them. this is actually the 2nd version of my other story "someone to hold". They're almost the same but I've made this more emotional. Hope someone likes this.

Sorry for the typos

Ciao