AN: Here a quasi-sequel to my earlier RK work, "Blood Stained Rain". This one is much more choppy and relfective of his thoughts.
Again any constructive comments are welcome. Rurouni Kenshin is important to me so I want to get the feel correct.
Snow White Emptiness
The snow fades slowly.
Leaving a clear, pale sky against dark sticks that some called trees.
He barely notices this.
He stares at the pale, white corpse beside him.
He feels….nothing
emptiness,
alone,
nothing,
emptiness.
A dull white nothingness drills into his soul leaving a hallow pain.
There is pain.
It is nothing.
It is pain.
…
It doesn't matter. Doesn't matter if anything makes sense.
He killed her. The woman he loved. He not only killed her but he killed her dream, her happiness.
What kind of man is he? What kind of person is he if he can kill his love's life and happiness?
What good am I if I can't even protect the one person I care most about in this world?
What good?...
The sound of bird calls barely registers. The early morning sun means nothing.
The day is so pretty but he sees nothing but snow whiteness.
I always felt such a strange sorrow over the deaths I've bled dry but I've never…I've never been on the receiving end. I've never felt what it was like to have your dearest love torn for you forever in an instance.
I never knew...knew…this pain…That any pain…could…feel…
But the pain over clouds his thoughts, taking his breath away. No thoughts, no words just pure, raw sorrow shredding through his body straight to his heart. Tears blur his vision and he closes his eyes tight. He sways, curls upon himself, grief and guilt thundering through his skin deep into his bones.
How
How
How…
Why…
What…
pain.
sorrow.
guilt.
nothing.
All he sees in snow falling and red blood leaking for her wound. Forever replaying in his mind.
Snow.
Nothing.
What does it…
Sorrow.
Numbing grief.
Painful nothingness that jabs like a katana.
And yet…
And yet…I can't stay here. I can't…I must go on…I must fight again. I must…murder again. No matter that my heart is broken and my soul is ripped, I must return. I must help the people I can see in this world. I must protect their happiness. If I cannot protect hers…
I cannot just throw away her gift to me. I cannot just…abandon life and nullify her sacrifice. I will live and I will murder…until …until the revolution's over. Then never again. I'll protect people's happiness. I'll save lives so people will always be smiling. I'll never let anyone suffer as I'm suffering.
Besides…I think…she would have wanted that.
I will live for you, my dearest beloved.
I love you.
