Disclaimer: "It's Dumbledore! When he was young! And French! No, it's like that Captain Picard guy! He talks with a British accent, when really he's from France!"

(An: Well, here we go again... I love doing these stories. At last, a popular reason to procrastinate!

CDLOC: Rogue isn't dense, she's just paranoid. Very, very paranoid. -shifty eyes- Yeah...

HH: I wanted to use the noodle incident, but then I remembered I used it on Andre in the last story. Jerry turned out to be funnier anyway. And when I involve the X-men in Jerry's creation I get this image of a very drunk Jean or Xavier making Jello tap-dance across the table... odd no?

Di: There you are! You do 'member it's your turn for CS, right? And I miss the Treasure chest series.. -cough cough-

Ish: Eurgh, don't mention bunnies... I had a fever a couple of weeks ago and the cough syrup gave me odd dreams, all about bunnies... yes, very weird, I know. Speaking of rabbits, just one q, Ish: Are Emil and Lapin the same person? I want to crack a joke about that if it's just a nickname in another fic I want to do, but I never quite got that straight... hell, I don't know who any of Remy's relatives are, pretty much.

Allimba: Compliments make me happy!

Silent Doom: Not really, but it might help. There is continuity... just not a lot. As for the diamond, it was the only thing I could think of. I'm not very original in that respect. Do you realize that you are the first person to give me constructive criticism that wasn't a flame... ever! Just look for the other "Shall We" stories.

Sangofanatic: I love Jubby and I couldn't resist a few jabs.

Abril4: Indeed...

ACBPB: Just don't tell Di you said that... I like Daphine! As for Jerry, see HH's response.

Epona04: Yeah, I just wanted to bug Robby fans... eurgh... -twitches at thought of X-2 scene-

Yay! Reviewers! And the ice cream thing is from a comics quote I read once... it involved Remy, safe-cracking, and Chunky Monkey ice cream... unfortunately I don't remember what site I found it on.)

A while later found Remy and Daphine in an ice cream shop.

The very terse assistant (Hi-My-Name-is-Sean) was trying to hurry them along because the boss was leaning out of her office and making throat-cutting gestures.

"What do y' t'ink?" Daphine asked, gazing down into the case.

"Two," Remy replied.

"Why two?"

"It's a big building. De alarm systems are too delicate t' jus' blow up. 'Sides, it's always good t' be prepared."

"D'accord... now what flavor?"

Over at a little booth, Kitty, Kurt, and Jubilee were watching them. "Oh. My. God. Why the heck are they talking about ice cream?"

Kitty and Kurt shrugged. "You've gotta understand, Jubes," said Kitty. "Remy doesn't tell us anything if he can avoid it. He keeps his mouth shut and just kind of stares at you until you change the subject."

"She should know," Kurt agreed. "She's the one who asks all the questions around the mansion. The phasing means she gets all of the answers and the questioned gets all of the annoyance, with none of the pain of physical assault."

Kitty slapped him.

"Funny, that seems pretty painful," Jubes commented.

"Ugh, can we drop the subject?" Kitty snapped. "Anyway, the gist of it is, Remy rarely makes any sense. Whenever anyone asks, he blames it on too much swamp gas when he was younger. Probably ice cream's some weird thief tradition on a first date or something."

"You think that's his new girlfriend, then?" Jubes asked.

"Yeah," Kurt and Kitty agreed in unison.

"She's got all the attributes: gorgeous- not that you're not better looking, Kitty," Kurt hastily assured her, sensing an impending slap, "rude, and blunt, with a perk, she's Cajun too."

Over by the ice cream counter, Remy and Daph finally agreed on a flavor and headed out, carrying two pints of ice cream.

"D'accord," said Remy. "Here's de deal. Tonight we stake out de place. Check it out. Tomorrow, we take de info we pick up tonight and plot, den get some sleep. Den we actually get de t'ing."

"Sounds good t' me," Daph agreed. "Is dere a good place t' eat 'round here?"

"Y' want trustworthy but expensive, or awful but fast and cheap?"

"Fast and cheap. I haven't had anythin' but airplane food in de last twenty-four hours."

Remy shuddered. "Don' mention airplanes, please."

Daphine giggled. "Still not over dat airsickness, den?"

"Shut up," said Remy, walking faster.

"I guess not."

Kitty, Kurt, and Jubilee were still stalking them. "I can't, like, believe him! He doesn't seem bothered at, like, all to be cheating on Rogue!"

"Ja, Rogue's not going to be happy about this..."

"Is she ever happy?" Jubilee asked.

"You haven't seen her around Remy," Kitty replied. "She likes having a punchbunny/boyfriend, apparently."

Jubilee blinked.

"I, like, guess you like it too," Kitty added with a sly grin.

Jubilee, still out of it, nodded. "Yeah, it's- would you shut up! Bobby's not my boyfriend!"

"Sure..." agreed Kitty and Kurt in unison.

Jubilee, blushing again, glared at them both.

"You know, I can see why Bobby makes you blush so much," Kurt said. "You go a very interesting color."

"Shut up," Jubilee mumbled. "Just 'cause you're older than me is no reason to treat me like this."

"Oh, it's not your age, we treat everyone like this," Kitty said, and Kurt nodded.

"Hey, look! They're going into the Gut Bomb!" Kurt cried, excited.

"Kurt, we just, like, ate- ohmigod! They are!"

"You mean you doubted me?" Kurt asked, looking miffed. Kitty ignored him and followed.

"Why is it so surprising that they went in the Gut Bomb?" Jubilee asked, as usual confused by the utter enigma that was Remy.

"Remy regularly knocks it," Kurt said, shaking his head. "He says that it's idiotic and a death-trap. Poor sap doesn't know what he's missing."

Kitty rolled her eyes. "God, that is like the you equivalent of smoking," she muttered as they walked inside.

Remy and Daph ordered, and then sat down. Daph unwrapped her burger. "So tell me 'bout dis girl. Why y' so upset?"

Remy sighed. "Look, Daph, it's a long story."

"I don' have anythin' better t' do, and neither do y'."

Remy rolled his eyes. "Forgot how hard-headed y' are. Basically, de idea's dis: I went through a lot t' get dat girl. Pain, mental and physical, was involved a lot o' de time. She's perfect- and now she hates me. Did I mention she also has one helluva left hook?"

Daphine smirked. "Sounds like your kind of woman."

"Oui, but she's also utterly paranoid- been double-crossed a lot, see- and tends t' jump t' conclusions... 'specially when it comes t' me. Anyway, dis'd be an easy t'ing t' fix, normally, but only if I went and fixed it ASAP. Let Rogue fester, and t'ings get messy. No doubt in m' mind, when I get back t' de mansion somethin' nasty's gonna be waitin' for me."

"What are they saying?" Kitty hissed. They were sitting near enough to Remy and Daphine that Kurt could pick up on what they were saying.

"Shh," Kurt hissed back. Then he blinked. "I don't think he's dating this girl."

"What do you mean!" Kitty and Jubilee whisper-shouted in unison.

"SHH!" Kurt responded. "He's... telling her about Rogue. In my experience the last thing women like to talk about is other women. And he's not even flirting with her!"

"Yeah, but he didn't flirt with Rogue and they still ended up, like, head over heels for each other," Kitty pointed out.

"Completely by accident, one might add," Kurt retorted. "Under different circumstances none of this crap would've happened. Now SHH!"

"Ok, I'm, like, sick of this," Kitty exclaimed, standing up.

"What are you doing?" Kurt asked.

"Going over there to see what really is going on!" Kitty replied, walking over to Remy and Daph's table.

"Oh, Gott," Kurt mumbled, walking after her. "Come on, Jubes."

Remy was trying to understand how Daph could stomach the food when Kitty came over. She tapped him on the shoulder. Remy whirled, and then blinked. "Oh, merde!"

"Shit's right," Kitty snapped. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Heh heh..." said Remy, rubbing the back of his neck. "Dis must look kinda bad," he mumbled, glancing over at Daphine, who was watching with detached interest. "Look, whatever it is Rogue's doin', it ain't m' fault. Daph's m' cousin. Dere's kind of an... issue down in Cajun country and me 'n her are tryin' t' sort it out, d'accord?"

"No, it's not!" Kitty responded. "Rogue's dating Bobby because of you!"

This got Remy. "Quoi! Why Bobby!"

"Because Bobby was there, and he created Jerry, so he was easy to blackmail."

The other X-people paused to stare at Jubes. "You mean Bobby did dat?" said Remy, with something akin to respect spreading across his face. "Didn' know he could do dat..." Then he shook himself. "Dis is worse den I thought."

"Damn straight!" Kitty agreed. "What are you guys doing, anyway?"

"Eatin'," said Daphine, her first foray into the conversation. "It's a family t'ing."

"I thought that whole thing with Belladonna was fixed now, though," said Kurt, puzzled.

Remy and Daphine twitched. "How many times do I have t' tell y' people, don' say her name!" Remy cried.

"And it's not about her," said Daphine. "Dis is different."

"But what the hell are we supposed to tell Rogue?" Kitty inquired.

"Chaton. Daphine. Is. M'. Cousin. Dis is family business. I need a day or two t' sort it out and den I fix t'ings. But right now, 'm way too busy."

"With what?" Kitty asked. "Eating?"

"Plotting," Remy answered. "Thief stuff."

"Real specific, you," Kitty muttered.

"Chaton, jus' tell Rogue 'm not cheatin', ok?" Remy said, rubbing his temples. "Dieu, I don' need dis."

"Come on, Kit," said Kurt, tugging on her arm. "This is getting too Jerry Springer-ish for my tastes."

Kitty glared at him but allowed herself to be dragged off.

Daphine, who had finished off her burger, watched them exit. "Friends o' yours?"

"Oui," Remy said, now leaning his head on the table.

"What was up wit' 'em?"

"Kurt- the guy- is Rogue's brother, and he and Kitty were very involved in me 'n Rogue's relationship."

"How so?" Daphine had a curious/suspicious look on her face.

"Nothin' like dat, y' freak! Dey helped out when we conned de Guilds into ditchin' de arranged marriage t'ing, and den when we went t' get Rogue's power thingy. Dey kind of feel responsible for us, I guess."

"Dey sound kind of insane t' me."

"Oui," Remy agreed fervently.

"What about de third chick?"

"Jubilee. She's Bobby's girlfriend."

"Ah."

"Now let's get on wit' dis, hmm?"

Daph tossed away the wrapper and they headed out.

(And that's that. Keep those lovely reviews coming. As for why this was so late, we had car troubles and stayed two days longer than we expected. Blegh.)