I dunno about this chapter…it's essential, but I still want to rewrite it again. I've rewritten it three times now. I've got to stop doing that. Oh, well…here goes.
Chapter 16: Cat and Fox
Bri
Ever since Kurama found out about my heart, he's been really quiet. Not detached or anything, just really soft-spoken, almost shy. Well, more than before. I've kept up my training on the dance machine, and I keep painting more. We eat together, but we don't talk as much anymore. He's just really quiet.
Why is he so quiet?
I guess if I had to live with a dead person, I'd be quiet, too.
After a while, I could hold the golden light steady without feeling tired. It's when I started doing it multiple times that I started needing sleep again. Gina appeared again after another month with our homework. I had left everything on that table. She smiled at me, seeing the angel of fate still on the top of the stack.
I sat down at the table with my biology homework. We were still on tiny organisms. I wanted to throw it all away, but I needed this credit. Even if the school wasn't really all that certifiable, at least this meant that I wouldn't have to take the subject again if we transferred or whatever.
We had to write an essay on single-celled organisms and their environment. I didn't even know if Kurama had come out of the other room or not. I just started writing on the assignment. I figured this, too, we'd do in silence. Whether he was there or not.
"Stop."
I nearly fell out of the chair. "Jeez, Kurama, don't scare me like that!"
"Bacteria can live in extreme temperatures," he said softly. "I thought you took this class in middle school."
He was talking again. That was good.
"Yeah…I did. I just didn't pay attention."
I crumpled my essay up and tossed it in the general direction of the trash can. I'd pick it up later.
"Bri…" I kept my head down on the table. If I didn't look at him, maybe he'd keep talking. "I'm sorry about my silence of late. I've been thinking."
"For a couple of weeks?" I smirked to myself. I laughed softly. "I thought you were smarter than that."
"Damn it, Bri, listen to me!"
I blinked and finally looked up. "Sheesh, I didn't even know you knew that word."
He started pacing.
"I needed the time," he said. Pace. Back, forth. Back. Forth. "Bri, we've gotten to the point where we know one another like we know ourselves." He avoided my eyes as I sat in my chair. I had a bad feeling about where this was headed.
"Yeah, we have."
He stopped pacing. Those beautiful green eyes studied me. Like suddenly I really would finally follow my heart in death. I'm not sure why, but I wanted him to keep looking at me like that. Like if he didn't, I really would die.
"You wrote once in your journal about your painting," he said. He picked it up off of the table, the painting. "The angel of fate. Gabriel. You wondered what it meant."
I panicked. I'd forgotten about that particular entry. The poor guy must be traumatized, that was it. I'd hurt his trust, somehow.
"I'm sorry if I—"
"Calm down." He stared at the painting, at Gabriel, looking away from him. "You wrote that you were confused. I was, too. Are you still confused, Bri?" I'm sure my nose twitched, which was a definite sign of confusion with me. Where was this headed? And why did he keep looking at my painting like it was his last link to sanity?
"Y-Yes…About a lot of things."
He turned away from the painting, set it down on the table. Kurama's lean back was to me. He was looking away from me, just like Gabriel was in my painting. "So was I…for a long time. I want to know something. I don't want to be confused anymore."
He glanced over his shoulder at me. His eyes were scary-looking, almost maniacal. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet, but firm. Resolution was in his face.
"Not about this."
I stared at him, pausing before considering what should come out of my mouth. This was getting scary, at least to me. Exasperated, I spoke at last.
"About what, Kurama?"
He chuckled softly. A little forced laugh, the kind that made you wonder why someone was nervous. Why was Kurama nervous? His voice was low when he spoke at last. It sent a shiver down my spine.
"I wonder, Bri, how you f-feel…about me."
My knees started shaking under the table. My heart started to flutter, to beat. Just a few seconds. It was beating again. Then it stopped. Again. I stared at Kurama. I tried to work my mouth, to say the words. To say, "I love you, that's how I feel." Instead, I managed to whisper another question.
"H-How I f-feel about…you?"
He was blushing. Kurama's face was so red, darker than his hair, I almost laughed. This was a joke, right? I was going to get caught in the joke. His green eyes trailed down, and stared at the floor. I stood up from my chair, a little shaky, but still, I could do it. I stared at his face. A little higher than mine, a little harder to see. I thought about getting on the chair, to waste time.
I didn't know what to do, except ask yet another question. "The truth?"
He nodded.
I chewed on my lip, something I never did. I could feel my knees quaking, also something that had never happened. Tell Kurama the truth? I wanted to tell him the truth. I wanted to feel my heart beating…
"I'm closer to you than I ever was to Keiko," I said softly. "Than I've ever been to anyone else. Sometimes… My heart starts beating again when I just look at you. I'm not so heartsick anymore. I like you. A lot."
Like. I'd said "like". Like a little seventh grader and her first crush. I felt my face burn in embarrassment. Was this what he wanted? To make me make a fool of myself? I knew Kurama better than that, though, deep down. I knew Kurama had a reason to ask me these questions.
His green eyes swung straight into mine, like they were meant to be there. Kurama's face was so close, I could barely see anything but his eyes. Not that I minded. He smiled at me, a smile that I'd never seen before on his face. Giddy. My heart fluttered. Started. Stopped. My spine shivered. My stomach twisted itself over and over in knots.
"I love you, Bridget."
He got it right. He said my name.
I laughed just like he had. That same nervous laugh. "I had no idea. Me, too."
Kurama smiled wider.
I wasn't quite sure what to do. I mean… What do you do when someone tells you they love you? Just run off and kiss them? I'd rather just stay like this forever, him staring into my eyes and I into his. I don't know how it happened, who made the first move.
But suddenly, our eyes were a whole lot closer. I smiled at him, a strange pull at my lips that felt different. My heart started, beating faster and faster, like a little jackhammer in my chest. I felt a gently touch on my cheek. His hand.
I was shivering, and not from the cold. Suddenly, his lips were on mine. So quick and soft, I wasn't really sure. I studied his eyes. A tint of gold shimmered among the familiar green. I smiled at him, held my arms around his neck. His lips fell on mine, and I moved to meet him kiss for kiss.
His lips were silk and fire. He tasted of chocolate and the wild forest, dangerous and potent and sweet all at once. I kissed him back and slid my arms around his waist. The world spun in elegance and danger, like a dance of knives. A purr escaped my lips, a purr like a cat's.
I know now why he was a fox demon. He was sharp and sensual. His hands ran up and down my back, slowly lighting a fire. I don't know how, but my hands found his hair. Soft and vibrant and gentle, like a fox's furry tail. I smiled into his mouth.
And lost myself in him.
I've got three votes yes on the sequel, so I went ahead and started it up. For whoever said to finish this one first…it is done. I just don't wanna upload it all at once. Aren't I sooooo evil?
