Title: Carry Me Home

Rating: PG-13 and R for violence and occasional sexual implications

Summary: Inuyasha's been wounded and is trapped in a sleep in which visions of a life he doesn't remember plague him. A life in which he was not a small child running from humans to become a nervous young man in love with a miko, but something else completely.

Disclaimer: Copyright for Inuyasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and the author does not write for profit

Author(ess): bluefuzzyelf

Chapter Four

"Inuyasha? May I speak to you?"

Inuyasha looked up from his food. "Sure," he grunted. "What about?"

"It is a private matter."

Inuyasha shrugged and stood up, following Hakura outside and away from prying ears.

"What do you want?"

"Do you know anyone by the name of Alitash?"

A flood of memories assaulted Inuyasha, things he had seen in his healing induced trance.

"Alitash?" His voice was no louder than a whisper and the name he whispered conjured up visions of a beautiful woman with dark skin and ebony hair, brown eyes and full lips. Smiling, laughing, killing, lying, kissingwhoa, wait, kissing?

"I don'tI know the name, and I know her face. But I don't know how, because I've never seen her in my life." Nor have I kissed her, he thought.

Hakura nodded. "I thought so. I think I have found the reason my healing did not work on you. You took a potion, sometime earlier in your life that made you forget everything before it. I found traces of it oozing out of your wound. That is why you are having memories you can't explain. That is what's happening?" Inuyasha nodded. "The potion was mixed badly, with an herb in it that repels major healing. It is commonly used as a poison.

"I heard you mutter the name Alitash and I wanted to know who she was. Do you want to know? It may trigger more memories."

Inuyasha nodded, not able to speak.

"She was an arena fighter. A panther youkai, beloved of the people." Flashes of hot sand, blood spattered mocha skin, "She fought in the rings of the Eastern Lands. Even now, they partake in that barbaric practice." Hakura eyed Inuyasha. He was standing stock still, not even his ears twitching.

A smile that lit up the night, skillful hands caressing his shoulders, the soft clink of her braids as the beads knocked together.

"She is alive."

That sentence seemed to waken Inuyasha. He turned to her, his eyes blazing. "Alive? After so long? It isn't possible."

"They say she's waiting for her rescuer." Inuyasha fell to his knees. "They called him The Beast and they chanted for the Half-Breed."

Inuyasha stood, turned to go back inside, then whipped back around to face Hakura. "Thank you." It was but a whisper. Hakura bowed her head. "It was the least I could do for you, my lord." He started, then nodded at her.

Inuyasha strode back inside. "We leave at dawn for the Eastern Lands."

They traveled fast and hard, Inuyasha driven by an unseen force. At night, when they rested, Kagome could hear Inuyasha's whimpers and saw his thrashing. They were nights not well spent.

Inuyasha remembered more and more of his life each night, remembered his men, his woman, the girl he looked on as a sister. It tortured him, for every night he would get closer to knowing how he escaped and why he chose to forget. He was wracked with guilt at not going back for her, admiration filling him when he thought how long she'd survived in the rings.

He wondered if she'd remember him.

Each day was an attempt to both reach night and outrun it. The dreams were a blessing and a curse that he kept to himself, not listening when the others complained about fatigue or hunger.

Shippou rode with him, silent on his shoulder. The little kit hardly ever left him now. Inuyasha was grateful.

At dawn on the tenth day of travel, they reached a city. They stood on a cliff overlooking it. The roofs glittered in the rising sun, nearly blinding the travelers. Inuyasha gazed upon it with a mixture of loathing and excitement. Kagome had learned not to ask him why they went so fast, or what he was thinking about. She saw his expression, and for the thousandth time wondered what was so important.

As they drew closer to the city, Kagome and the others stared at the architecture. It was like nothing else in the Sengoku Jidai. Kagome could see things that looked African, or influences from China and even some Mediterranean. Sango and Miroku gaped. Shippou sat calmly on Inuyasha's shoulder and stared only occasionally. If Inuyasha could walk to this place without batting an eye, so could he.

They camped at nightfall on the outskirts of the city. A fire was made and dinner was served. When bedrolls had been laid out and everyone was getting ready to sleep, Inuyasha announced that he would be back soon.

"What? Where are you going?" Kagome was perplexed. Where could he possibly want to go?

"I'll be back," was all he said. He set Shippou down by Kagome with orders to sniff out any predators and warn the rest. Then he set off, his form slowly disappearing into the shadows.

Inuyasha grabbed a cloak from an unsuspecting vendor closing shop. It was well made and warm, but most of all, it hid his countenance. As he swung it over his body, another memory hit him, so strong as to almost knock him off his feet.

"Tash, you must wait here. I've found a way out, but I will not risk you or Maiya or my men until I know it's safe."

"Inuyasha, don't go!" Her voice was hoarse.

"I must," he said, grabbing Alitash and holding her in his arms. "Udo found me a way."

"Udo! Can you trust him?"

"Yes, Tash, we can. He is perhaps the only honest youkai outside of these cells." Her pushed her away a bit and stared into her eyes. "I'll come back for you, Tash. Don't you ever believe I won't come back. I promise you."

Alitash held onto his tightly before gently placing her mouth on his.

"I love you."

Inuyasha nuzzled her hair. "I love you to. Now go!"

She left, and he pulled on a cloak that shielded his face. He snuck past the guard at his gate and left through a hidden tunnel by the door to the arena. He hurried quietly and finally reached the opening. He crouched low and hid among the plants growing in abandon along the wall of the arena.

He saw Udo on a horse, waiting for him, a spare horse in his hand. The youkai motioned with his hand. Inuyasha ran.

The sound of an arrow cutting through air made his heart tighten. The arrow lodged itself in his shoulder and he held back his scream. Udo helped him onto his horse and they rode away, the devil at their heels.

They finally stopped as the sun was just about to rise. Inuyasha was shivering form the cold and his wound. Udo led him inside a small house. An old haggard woman waited there, a kind expression on her face.

"Oh, dear, you're wounded!" She pushed Inuyasha down onto a futon and prepared some hot water.

"Udo, my dear, hold him down. This is going to hurt, I'm afraid." The woman reached over as Udo held his arms down and yanked the arrow free of his shoulder. Inuyasha bit his cheek so hard he bled, but he barely made a sound.

"Strong one you have here, Udo," said the woman as she bathed Inuyasha's wound. "Where did you rescue him from?"

"The arena."

The woman gasped. "Oh, the poor thing!"

"I'm fine," grunted Inuyasha.

She clucked over him and smoothed back his hair before tying his shoulder up tightly in a white linen bandage.

Udo rose to leave. "I do not know when I will next see you, Grandmother, but I hope it will be soon."

The old healer raised a wrinkled palm to the young youkai's face. "I do too, my young one, I do too."

Udo left. Inuyasha was swimming in and out of consciousness. He heard her muttering something about how no one should have to live with those memories. She shuffled back over to him.

"Here, my dear, take this. It'll help." Inuyasha drank the bitter liquid in the healer's hand. His vision began to go fuzzy and his eyes lolled.

"Woman, what did you do to me!"

"Shh, there, everything will be okay. You won't remember a thing."

Inuyasha came back to reality with a jolt. It had been her fault, the old woman's! She had mixed his potion wrong, and not only wiped his memories but made it impossible for another to heal him! Inuyasha snarled into the night. How dare she invade him in that way! His memories were his own, and not to be toyed with!

Inuyasha drew the cloak close around him and stalked over to where he knew a place that sold expensive silk clothing set up shop. He broke in silently, grabbing several items of clothing and putting them in a bag he found in the store. He also grabbed a few pots of scent and some plate armor for himself form the armory. Then he left, feeling no remorse for the traders' loss of money. After all, it was they who captured him in the first place.

When Kagome woke up, Inuyasha was in a tree, his head bowed and his eyes closed. She glared at him. She was waited up for him to come back before sleep had overcome her.

"When did you get back?"

Inuyasha didn't move. "You were all asleep."

"I thought you had said soon."

He opened his eyes. "I miscalculated, okay?" He was on edge and Kagome, as much as she didn't like it, sat back.

"What were you doing?"

"Running an errand. Wake up the others, I'll start a fire."

They had breakfast, Inuyasha evading all questions. When everyone had finished and their things packed up, Inuyasha fetched the bag of clothing. He brought it out and dumped the contents on the ground.

"There. Find something that fits." Inuyasha, having already selected his outfit, slumped against a tree.

"Where did this all come from, Inuyasha?" asked Sango, admiring a silk kimono of a dark blue.

"The city."

Miroku chuckled and chose clothing in shades of purple.

"You stole it, you mean," replied Sango, undisturbed and picking out a kimono of several layers in sunset colors.

Kagome sputtered. "You stole this?"

"Don't matter. Wasn't like they didn't deserve it."

"How do you know?" Kagome fumed. He'd stolen it!

"I just do, okay! Now pick something out so we can go!"

Shippou had already dressed himself in light blue. "C'mon Kagome, trust him." She turned disbelieving eyes on him, as did everyone else in the group. He shrugged. "He's never lead us wrong before."

Kagome let out a frustrated breath and was about to reach for a set of gold robes when a clawed hand whisked them away. "Not these ones. They weren't supposed to be there. Another set."

Kagome glared at him as he folded the silk and stuffed it in his haori. She found a multi-layer kimono like Sango's in greens and they set off to change. Miroku donned his new clothing and admired the feel of silk on his skin.

"These are truly beautiful clothes, Inuyasha. Thank you."

Inuyasha grunted. "You'll have to put your hair down," he said from behind a tree where he was getting dressed.

"Down? Why?"

"Cause they'll notice your ears. This is a youkai city we're going into. You gotta act like a youkai. I'll take care of your scent."

Miroku nodded, even though Inuyasha couldn't see him, and let his hair down. It hung by his neck in soft waves and he combed a hand through it.

Inuyasha came out from behind the tree dressed in black, looking far too like his older brother than was comfortable for Miroku. He had pinned his ears down and combed his hair so that no one would notice his lack of ears. He had on a plate of armor across his chest and a red sash across his waist that held Tetsusaiga. His feet were for once not bare but booted. He walked over to Miroku and surveyed him.

"Not bad. We'll have to do something about the rosary though. He thought for a moment. "Well, just take the ring off. No self-respecting youkai is a servant of Buddha." Miroku complied. They waited in silence for a few minutes more before the girls came back. They were visions of beauty, clad in silk and more gliding than walking.

"Sango, Kagome, you look beautiful."

The girls blushed. Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "It's not for beauty, houshi, it's for function. C'mere," he told Kagome. She stepped forward timidly. Inuyasha ran his claws through her hair, pulling it down and forward. "Oi. Have any of that 'gel' stuff left?"

She nodded and went to get it. Inuyasha took it form her and worked some of the foul smelling sticky stuff into her hair, so that it looked fashionable yet still covered her ears. He repeated the process with Sango.

Inuyasha stepped back to assess his work. "It'll do." He moved back towards the bag. "Now, we're going into a youkai city, so you have to act, talk, and walk like the arrogant bastards that live here."

Kagome started. "Youkai city?"

Sango nodded. "Didn't you notice? There were no humans there."

"Almost no humans," Inuyasha muttered. "Now, I have some oil that will cover up your natural scent. I want you to put it on. Wrists, the pulse point at your neck and the insides of your elbows. Be generous."

Inuyasha's attitude was freaking Kagome out. He was, if not very calm, in control of the situation. He had pre-planned this, had gone to the trouble of working every little thing out and was commanding them like a seasoned general. He sounded like he knew what he was talking about, like he'd been here before and knew exactly what was going on.

It was not the usual brash, arrogant Inuyasha who rushed headlong into things, sword ablaze.

Kagome dabbed on the oil and rubbed it in. Sango and Miroku were doing the same thing. Shippou was being oddly quiet and he sat and waited for whatever was to come.

Inuyasha retrieved the oil pots from the humans when they were done and stuck them into his haori. Kagome caught a glimpse of gold silk.

"One more thing. Sango, you can't carry your weapons. Those hidden blades of yours are fine, but hiraikotsu and your wakizashi stay behind. Bouzo, your staff stays. Kagome, your bow and your arrows stay. Miroku, you know how to use a sword?"

"Yes, of course."

"Then take Sango's." Inuyasha fixed them all with a piercing gaze. "Do not speak to anyone. If someone tries to speak to you, give them a disdainful look, like they aren't worth your time. Walk like you know where you're going and for god's sake don't fucking make any stupid comments. You have to act like you're nobility. Whatever happens, don't scream."

Kagome shivered. Scream? She held onto Sango for comfort and the older girl squeezed her hand. "Don't worry," she whispered. "He may be acting differently, but he's still Inuyasha."

"Damn right."

Sango chuckled. "See?"

Inuyasha stashed their old clothes, Kagome's backpack and the spare weapons in a tree. Then they began a winding walk through the trees to a wide road. Inuyasha stepped onto it and started to walk with the strut of his brother. The others copied his moves, and Shippou, who sat on his shoulder, looked around like a highly spoiled princeling.

Inuyasha led them through the city gates and along a series of small roads, clearly knowing where he was going. Despite the growing apprehension in her gut, Kagome stayed in her role and glared down at one filthy tradesman who was trying to sell her sake. The man backed down immediately.

Inuyasha slowed a bit and laced his arm through hers, motioning for Sango and Miroku to do the same. Sango sent Miroku a look that promised death if he even thought of doing anything untoward. She needn't have, however. That was the last thing on Miroku's mind.

As they drew closer and closer to the middle of the city, Inuyasha quickened his pace. There was loud cheering and calling, youkai making bets alongside the road. There was a sharp turn in the road and there, in the center of the city, was the arena. Kagome likened it to the Coliseum, only smaller, but no less impressive. Inuyasha walked purposefully toward it, and Kagome's bad feeling intensified. If this place was like the Coliseum, then what went on inside wasKagome's eyes widened. Please tell me it's not that, she thought.

She felt a quick squeeze on her arm form Inuyasha and took a deep breath.

As they neared the gates to the arena, Inuyasha straightened even more. Kagome had never realized just how tall Inuyasha was.

They breezed by the bull youkai guards at the entrance and made their way to an empty booth, a shade of colored silks over their heads. Kagome breathed a sigh of relief. They had made it. She looked around curiously. It was like the Coliseum, only two stories and much less steep. They sat in one of many booths close to the ground. The arena itself was a large swath of beaten earth. At two sides were doors. Kagome shuddered to think of what came through those doors.

"Relax," came Inuyasha's soft voice. It belied his tense shoulders and deadpan face that looked out onto the arena. Miroku and Sango sat next to them, barely containing their wonderment and disgust. Shippou sat in Sango's lap, staring at one of the doors.

People filled the stands, everyone from the lowest youkai to the Lord of the Eastern Lands was there. Inuyasha struggled not to jump at the man who had caused his torture so many years back.

Being at the arena was like being back in hell, only this time, he wasn't the one fighting. Inuyasha clenched his fists so tight he broke the skin. Luckily, he was wearing black, and the combined stink of twenty thousand people hid the scent of blood. The wounds healed quickly.

Inuyasha rolled his shoulder, and was glad to know that it was completely healed. It hadn't so much as twinged while they traveled, and he guessed that being out of the trance let him heal on his own.

A youkai announced a youkai called Terio, to the audience's pleasure. A young bird youkai stepped out of the door on the right. He wore the customary uniform, no more that a piece of cloth around his waist and crude leather armor on his chest. He was armed with a long katana.

The other was a human. He had no name. The fight was over in minutes. Kagome had tried to hide her face in his shoulder, but her made her watch.

"If you don't want to watch, just let your eyes glaze over. But you have to pretend to enjoy it, or we'll be found out."

She had been the only one to look away.

They sat through one more fight before they called their champion. Kagome felt Inuyasha tense as they called "Alitash!"

Inuyasha went rigid as they called her name. He gritted his teeth and stared at the left door as it opened and she stepped out.

She stood by the door, skin glistening from oil. Her hair was up in that tail he had told her to always wear in battle. She had gotten injured once because her hair was in her face and her vision obscured. She raised her sword, a thick broadsword that she had brought from her homeland. They had allowed her to bring it after she killed five men to keep them from taking it.

The crowd cheered her name. Inuyasha only breathed it, but his companions caught it.

"Alitash."