Numb

And each and everyday will lead into tomorrow
and tomorrow brings one less day without you
but don't wait up just leave the light on
cause all the roads that I might take will all one day lead back to you

Ashley slid farther into the booth, please stay away Craig please stay away. She closed her eyes and mentally continued her mantra. "Hey Ash…" Ash opened one of her eyes.

"Hi Craig…" she said disappointed as she slid back, slowly hoping to regain her composure, "so what are you doing here?" Ashley said as she slowly reminded herself mentally that she deserves a slap for trying to be civil with the cheating bastard.

"Picking up dinner for Joey and Angie…it's my turn, and we both know I can't cook so…"Craig said, talking as if they were old friends. Ashley rolled her eyes, I can't believe he's trying to make small talk, this was a position Ashley hated, she didn't want Craig to be civil. She didn't want to be civil with Craig, in fact if it were possibly to let all her inhibitions go and succumb to the primal urges, she wanted to punch Craig in the face for what he put her through. "So why are you here…?"

Ashley opened her mouth to speak and suddenly her face light up and glowed like a neon sign, "Mark!" she said waving frantically. Craig spun around and his face flushed a pale green. Mark? Who the hell is Mark? Craig looked on confused as the tall boy in girls jeans? What kind of self respecting man wears girls jeans? Craig was looking Mark over, in the ever usual jealous boyfriend type of way. Black Hair, Lip Rings, Girls Jeans, Gauged Ears…and then his eyes fell upon the tee shirt he was wearing… My Chemical Romance shirt. Ash adores MCR. Craig backed out of the way as Ashley pushed past him and gently kissed Mark on the cheek. He blushed slightly and slid into the booth across from Ashley.

"So who is this?" Mark asked looking at Craig, smiling. Craig hated that.

"Craig,…my ex-boyfriend," Ashley said, emphasizing the ex gleefully.

"Nice to meet you Craig," Mark stuck his hand out to shake his hand but was instead met with a fist to the face. Ashley gasped. Never in a million years did she expect Craig to hit anyone, anyone at all, especially after dealing with his father. Ashley slid out of the booth in lighting speed and grabbed the back of Craig's shirt, pulling him away from Mark. She was fuming with anger as she spun him around to face her.

"What the hell is your problem?" Ashley asked, "If anyone deserves to be punched it's you! You cheated on me, You lied to me, You lied to Manny, what right do you have to come in here and start a civil conversation with me and punch my date?"

Craig was silent.

"You know what?" Ashley said, "I should have done this—" and punched him square in the jaw, "a long time ago, jerk." Ashley turned around to face Mark, "I'm sorry about this, do you wanna go somewhere else?" she asked, "I hear there's a pretty cool record shop on Johnson Ave, and a Starbucks® around the corner.

"That sounds good," he said, sliding out of the booth and taking Ashley's hand as she offered it and together they walked out of the Dot, leaving Craig behind, nursing his jaw.

"Are you okay?" Ashley asked as they talked down towards Johnson Ave.

"I'm fine, don't worry about it," Mark answered, "you handled it all pretty well."

"I'm really sorry about that…I didn't think…"

"No really, it's fine…so um…" Mark was blushing, "how could he…how could anyone ever cheat on you, gorgeous?"

And now it was Ashley's turn to blush.


The sun had just gone down when Ellie made it to Sean and Tracker's humble home.

" I swear, I think he was born a girl," Tracker mumbled, as he slaved over the stove for a small dinner for two with his girlfriend, Kemmie.

Ellie laughed, "I know what you mean, it definitely didn't take me this long to get ready."

"Are you two talking about me?" Sean asked as he walked out into the living room, playing with his messy head of hair.

Ellie stood up, "of course we are…" she said before kissing him on the cheek, "mmm, you smell nice."

Sean laughed and grabbed his coat, "I'll see you later Track…"

"Wait…Ellie, can I talk to you a sec" Tracker said before she could walk out the door.

Sean watched suspiciously as Ellie gave him the look to go ahead, I'll catch up. She walked into the kitchen and leaned against the counter top, "yea?" she asked.

"I know you're still doing it," he said, "I'm not stupid…watch yourself kid, he likes you, I like you, you're good for him, don't let him find you one morning because you slipped up."

Ellie bit her lip, "I'm sorry, I … I won't Tracker…I'll be careful" she said and kissed him on the cheek before skipping out the door.

"What did he want?" Sean asked wrapping an arm around her.

"Told me to keep an eye on you, what else?" she lied. She lied and she felt utterly guilty about it. Sean squeezed her tight and she smiled. Ellie reached down for his hand and laced their fingers as they walked down to the ravine.

From the top of the hill they could see the glow of the fire and loud music. Walking down the path they met up with Jay and Alex at some of the stolen picnic tables. Ellie peeled off her coat and laid it on the bench.

"look at that, the little vamp made it" Jay joked.

"And look at that, the drunk's sober yet…" Ellie rolled her eyes and laughed as she reached into her black messenger bag and pulled out a CD case. She made her way over to the portable stereo and flipped through the CD's, "anybody care?" she asked, and heard no protests so she changed the music. She walked back over to Sean, Jay, and Alex and leaned back as they casually knocked back a few beers. She hated drinking, maybe it was because she didn't want to end up like her mom. A mix between that and the fact that she despised the taste, with that she grabbed Sean's hand and they moved and went crazy with the music, with Jay and Alex watching on, laughing drunkenly at the pair.

Get your bravery from a six pack
Get your bravery from a half-pint
Drink your whiskey, drink your grain
Bottoms up and you don't feel pain

GO OUT AND FIGHT, FIGHT
BOTTLED VIOLENCE

Lose control of your body
Beat the shit out of somebody
Half-shut eyes don't see who you hit
But you don't take any shit

GO OUT AND FIGHT, FIGHT
BOTTLED VIOLENCE

Ellie shook her head violently her wild red hair whipping around her face as her boots collided with the dirt on the ground. She found herself two-stepping and kicking up chunks of dirt and grass with every step and Sean drunkenly tried to follow suit before falling on the ground laughing. Ellie stopped and looked down at Sean who looked up at her smiling, and pushing his hair out of his face while absentmindedly dropping his can of beer to the ground. Ellie brushed her hair back with her fingers and extended her hands to him, and he pulled her down into his lap and kissed her on the cheek and then roughly on the mouth. His lips tasting like a sweet mixture between alcohol and cheap lip balm. Ellie licked her lips nipped at Sean's while wrapping her arms around his neck and falling on top of him as he fell backwards from his seated position.

Jay and Alex laughed, "get a van you two…" Jay said between drinks.

Ellie stood up and pulled Sean to his feet and aided as he stumbled over to the rundown van with dirty shag carpeting. Closing the door behind her she looked over at Sean as he stared at the ceiling of the van. She crawled over to him and playfully straddled her legs across her his waist and bent down to kiss him when he stopped her. His mind slowly sobering up. "I can't Ellie…" he said, trying to think through his drunken state, "I'm drunk, please not while I'm drunk, I wanna remember your touch in the morning and not have to struggle to do it…"

Ellie laid down next to him and sighed as Sean wrapped his arms around her and snuggled up next to her, nuzzling her neck. "I'm sorry babe," he whispered.


Ellie and Sean stumbled back into Sean's place shortly after one in the morning, or at least Sean stumbled, Ellie carried, as best she could. She dropped him on his bed and turned to leave when he grabbed her hand, "it's late babe, crash here."

Ellie frowned, as much as she wanted to crawl into bed with Sean and crash it wasn't happening tonight. She kissed his forehead, "sorry Sean, I'm gunna go home, I'll come over tomorrow." She turned off the light in his room and walked through the living room and was about to leave when a voice stopped her, "leaving?"

"Gotta go home sometime Tracker" Ellie said reaching for the doorknob.

"It's one in the morning Ellie, it's not safe to be walking alone in the dark…"

"I'm not helpless Tracker…"

"and I'm not about to let you walk home alone in the dark, grab the extra helmet, I'll drive you home," he said grabbing his keys as Ellie reluctantly obeyed. She closed the front door behind her and climbed on the back of Tracker's motorcycle. The ride was short, but trying to get into her house took much longer.

"You okay?" Tracker asked, pulling off his helmet, the same one Ellie had personalized for him for Christmas. Ellie handed the extra helmet back to Tracker, and avoided eye contact. "Guess not," he said taking the helmet from her. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"You're lying…"

" I know…"she said digging in her coat pocket for her keys.

"is it about Sean?"

Ellie looked up and nearly dropped her keys.

"it's about Sean then…" he said turning off his bike, "what did he do?"

"it's not what he did do, it's what he didn't do…"

Tracker threw the kickstand with his foot and eased himself off the bike, leaning back on it gently.

"he said, he didn't want to do anything, because he'd been drinking, he wanted to be sober…"

"and what's wrong with that Ellie?"

She remained quiet.

"I dunno, I just…needed something more physical than cutting?" Tracker asked. Ellie nodded. "I've been there Ellie, you know that, come here" he motioned for her to come closer, and he wrapped her up into a hug. "Goodnight Ellie" he said letting her go.

Ellie watched as Tracker slipped the helmet back on his head after securing the spare and drove off. She picked her keys up off the ground and walked up to her front door and quietly unlocked it and closed it. She locked the door and leaned back against it for a moment before walking up the stairs to her room, collapsing on her bed in her clothes.

She wanted to be loved tonight. She cut, but her cuts couldn't give her the physical love she wanted or needed. She wanted to feel her body connected with Sean's, she wanted his lips burning across her skin. And he couldn't, no he wouldn't give it to me. She leaned over her bed and reached underneath and pulled out her box, and placed it on the bed. She pulled off her coat and sat Indian style on the bed before pulling back her sleeves and peeling back the bandages from earlier. She pulled out an exact-o knife and with shaking hands she pressed it against her skin, dragging it across, watching as blood beaded up and spilled out. "Why wouldn't he love me tonight?" she asked herself aloud.


A/N: Okay, I didn't, and I don't think I'll make it to the third new chapter I was pushing for guys, I'm so tired, right now, and I have class tomorrow, so I'll try maybe to throw something up tomorrow. I hope you guys enjoyed these past two chapters, Thanks Rhian for the first review since I started posting again...you may have wanted a Mark/Craig fight, but I think you'll like what I did better. I'm thinking of ending this soon, and work on a sequel dealing with the story line with Rick in Season 4 and what not, because i do enjoy that story line quite a lot. I'll also prolly do a spin off about Ash and Mark if all goes good.

love all your reviews equally, but i love you for reading more 3

oh and the lyrics in this chapter are from Minor Threat Bottled Violence, so thank you Arthur (who else) to throwing a song my way...and if you guys are confused about what two-stepping is (and i'm not talking ghetto two-stepping) I mean hardcore/grindcore "dancing" I wish I had something that I could show you guys what I mean, personally I'm terrible at it, so I don't bother, I figure Ellie isn't as terrible at it as I am...

much love