I do not own smash brothers. (starts juggling radioactive material).


Peach

A small girl was selling lemonade from a jury-rigged stand. Business was quite good. More importantly the clientele were not jerks. Than along came a woman in pink.

She shoved past the little girl's patrons and flipped quarter to the girl. The girl glares at the woman before serving out a cup of lemonade.

Peach takes a swig and nearly spits it out.

"Sweet!" she said, angrily.

The little girl felt her pride take a beating. She always felt that her lemonade mixture was perfect. Grudgingly, she made another cup with less sugar.

Once again the woman nearly balks and shouts.

"Sweet!"

This time the girl takes out all the sugar and puts in pure lemon juice. She hands the cup to Peach, and eagerly awaited her reaction.

Peach spat out the juice.

"Sweet!"

That was it, thought the steamed girl. It was time to get the big guns.


Professor Frink had finally been able to recreate his 77X42 super sour ball. It was quite difficult, since he lost his notes.

"Now to turn around and admire my inventions." and so he did. And in turning around again he expected his sour ball to be still residing in its containment field. It wasn't

Frink stooped his head in depression at the lost of his sour ball. "Oh good glayven!" He cried.


The little girl dropped the sour ball into the pitcher of pure lemon juice. It glowed briefly than settle back into its former mundane state. She poured a cup for Peach, who drank it with gusto.

In what could be described as horrible, or funny depending on who you are, a black hole forms in Peach's mouth. She was immediately sucked in. The black hole disappeared afterwards.

The kids all stared at the spot the weird adult once occupied. Then they resume their line-up for their lemonades.

Bowser

Bowser found time between capturing princess Toadstool to take a tour of a New York City. It was a massive place, which made it great. He was massive, and therefore by association of massiveness, was equally as great as New York.

He takes the occasional picture from his massive mega pixel camera. Yep, that was great too.

"Holy crap," said one nearsighted man, "it's Godzilla!"

"No, no, no," chided his equally nearsighted friend, "you see those horns, it's my Mother-in-law." He waved at Bowser. "How you doing, Ma?"

Bowser promptly crushed the two and continued on his way. A blotch on this day, but there was much to see, to aid him in forgetting the idiocy he just experienced. It would've have worked except idiocy came in droves when these stories were made.

A group of teenagers, with attitude, were busy organizing a charity drive for the environment. They pestered every single person with their insufferable cheery attitude.

"Save the whales! Reduce plastic usage! Recycle!"

A businessman with the Wall Street Journal stopped by them.

"Go get a job you hippies!" he yelled before throwing a quarter at their feet.

"Hey guys," yelled their muscle bound, and idiotic, leader, "we're on our way!"

They all cheered.

"Soon, we'll be able to reach our goal of 500 billion," beamed the perky female, "The amount needed to clean the Earth!"

"Surely, with our upbeat attitude, anything is possible." Cheered the token nerd.

"Wait," said the ethnic minority member of the group, "is that one of Lamer's monsters?"

"I think it is," said another, less attractive, female, "we must destroy it without asking any question."

They took out their morphing hats, and shouted, "Go, go Brawn Wardens!"

(Stock footage transformation scene)

Bowser found himself growing hungry, so he headed to find a bistro. He located one that was packed, so he roared loudly scaring off the patrons. The cook just shrugged his shoulders and took his order.

Being the only customer, Bowser found his order served in record time. But before he could take a single mouthful of food, he was interrupted by a group of teenagers.

"Monster," they shouted, while doing karate moves, "you're reign of terror is over!"

Bower could not believe this. He heard of these losers. Saving the world, my ass, he thought. Why they were allowed to destroy the city time and time again to do so was beyond his comprehension. He roared at them to frighten them off.

"You hear that?" gasped the leader, "That roar must mean he's evil!"

"Was that why we attacked that zoo last week?" questioned the nerd.

"…Yes."

They all attacked Bowser with their kung fu. But their kung fu was no match for a dino king and a massive piece of lumber as thick as a telephone pole.

"The (cough) monster, is too powerful!" despaired the leader, "quick we must summon the Battle Bots"

"You mean the ones that are overpowering and able to quash our foes in a single blow, thus saving us from any injury had we summoned them in the first place?"

"Exactly!"

They all struck the same exact pose and shouted "We need-"

During that moment, Bowser swung with his all his might. The punk teenager exploded out of the restaurant, and impacted into an abandoned building. The old and depilated building instantly collapsed upon them. Bowser went back to his meal. When he finished he paid the meal, and a generous tip. Outside he encountered more unwelcome attention.

Judging from his appearance, he was from a resident from the rural south. He was waving a flag.

"Im aprotesting you monsters squashing us folks! For many decades youse use the small people to prove your monstrosity. I a demand you halta your rampage!"

Bowser made a move to crush the offending protestor.

"Go 'head!" shouted the man, "you can crush ma body but you cann neva crush mai spirit!"

Before Bowser could oblige the man, a shadow was blotting out the sun. Bowser looked up and his pupils widened in surprise. The Battle Bots had arrived. Their delay was due to him interrupting the teens before they could finish their summoning.

(WHAM)

The Bots crushes them both.

"Ow," moans the man, "mai spirit!"