Chapter 21

In the Staff Room

When Harry walked into the staff room on Monday morning he felt as if he had been run over by a steamroller. First he had spent a horrible, sleepless weekend going over every little detail of his meeting with Ginny in his mind. Then, after John had confronted him, he had spent another sleepless night planning how he was going to explain to his children that he had been lying to them for the past ten years. Harry knew better than to try to talk to his son when he was as upset as he had been the night before. He had therefore decided to let him calm down over night, and then talk to both of his children today.

Harry had really messed things up, and he needed time to think before he spoke to John and Lily again. Looking back, he didn't know how he could have been so stupid as to think that it was a good idea to hide everything from them. He, of all people, who knew so well what it felt like always to be kept in the dark. He should have told John and Lily about his identity the minute John had received his Hogwarts letter.

Instead, having made up his mind that no one was to find out that Harry Potter was alive, he had told nearly everyone but his own children who he was: Hagrid, Tonks, Luna, Ginny – but not Lily and John. Not to mention that he had still desperately tried to hide everything from John yesterday, when he as good as asked him right out if he was Harry Potter. What a fool he had been!

Harry sighed as he pushed open the door to the staff room. As if things weren't bad enough already, his first lesson of the day had been a disaster; it had been with the Slytherin fourth years, who had behaved even more obnoxiously than the Slytherins had used to behave in Harry's school days – or so Harry thought, at least. Although it seemed almost impossible, his only conclusion was that Pansy Parkinson must be an even worse Head of House than Snape had been.

To Harry's great relief, Pansy was not in the staff room today; the only teachers there were Luna and Tonks. They were sitting next to each other at the big table; Tonks was marking essays, and Luna was reading The Daily Prophet. Harry looked at the newspaper with a frown. The Daily Prophet … Colin Creevey's place of work. Tonks looked up from her essays as she heard Harry close the door.

'Hello, Harry,' she said absent-mindedly. 'We missed you at breakfast today.'

'I overslept,' Harry muttered. This wasn't strictly true – he had just not felt like facing the entire Great Hall that early in the morning. Not the way he looked after two sleepless nightsand a few glasses too many of firewhisky. As if she could read his mind, Tonks peered more closely at Harry's face.

'Are you all right?' she said. 'Don't take this the wrong way, but you look awful.'

'Er … rough weekend,' Harry said evasively, sitting down opposite her.

'Why, what happened?' Tonks looked genuinely concerned; it was more than mere curiosity.

Harry hesitated. Should he tell Tonks about having met Ginny? Luna already knew, and it seemed rather unfair to keep Tonks in the dark. Luna and Tonks were his two best friends in the Magical World right now; apart from Hagrid of course, but... Hagrid was different, and he was definitely not the right person with whom to discuss things like this.

'Well, on Saturday, I –' Harry began, when Tonks suddenly interrupted him.

'Oh, Harry, I almost forgot: John and his friends were asking me about … about Harry Potter yesterday. I thought I should give you a heads-up.'

'It's too late for that,' said Luna, looking up from her newspaper for the first time since Harry entered the room.

Tonks looked confused.

'Yes, it is,' Harry said in surprise. 'John came to see me last night. He'd figured out on his own who I really am, and he was far from pleased that I hadn't told him about it. I … I really messed the whole thing up pretty badly. Did you see that in the Orb yesterday, Luna? Because if you did, I think you might have warned me about it.'

'Oh, I didn't see that in the Orb at all,' Luna said dreamily. 'But this morning I saw something that's going to happen today, and from the context it was quite clear that John had confronted you yesterday.'

'Wow, Luna,' Tonks said sarcastically. 'Do you think you could be a little more cryptic?'

'Did you see me telling John and Lily the truth?' said Harry. 'Because that's what I intend to do.'

Luna simply shrugged non-comittally, and picked up her newspaper again. Tonks rolled her eyes.

'Ignore her, Harry,' she muttered. 'Just ignore her …'

'Would you like the sports section, Tonks?' Luna said sweetly. 'There's a most interesting article about the Guatemalan national Quidditch team …'

'I … what?' Tonks snapped. 'They don't have a national Quidditch team in Guatemala!' She snatched the newspaper from Luna's hand.

'They do now,' Luna said. 'Apparently, their Ministry of Magic have put a lot of gold into furthering Quidditch, and now they're going to try out for the World Cup.'

Harry couldn't help letting out a snort of laughter. He had suddenly remembered that Guatemala winning the next Quidditch World Cup was one of Luna's 'crazy predictions' that Tonks had told him about on his first day in the staff room.

'Well, that still doesn't mean that they'll win!' Tonks said, giving Harry an angry look. 'Anyway, let's get back to the subject. John must have taken it pretty badly, from the looks of you, Harry.'

Harry sighed. 'Well, yes he did … But that isn't everything …'

'No?' said Tonks, eyeing him intently.

'No,' said Harry, avoiding her gaze. He took a deep breath, and went on in the lightest possible tone, talking as fast as he could, without pausing long enough for Tonks to interrupt. 'I had a date with Pansy on Saturday, you see, took her for drinks at The Leaky Cauldron, and then I thought I'd take a look at the Ministry and just happened to bump into Ginny, very unfortunate, not at all what I'd planned, but what are you going to do in situations like these, and by the way – if Pansy asks, I-was-in-Slytherin-and-am-seven-years-older-and-finished-school-the-year-before-I-actually-started –' He stopped to catch his breath.

Tonks looked absolutely stunned. 'You saw Ginny?'

'Yeah …' said Harry, still avoiding her eyes. 'Listen, I don't really want to talk about it.'

'But Harry …' Tonks hesitated. 'But Harry, what did Ginny say? I mean, not how did she react,' she added at the look on Harry's face, 'but did she … did she tell you anything? Er, anything special?' She turned to Luna. 'Did she tell him … anything special?'

Luna shrugged again. 'Not that I know of.'

Harry stared at the two of them. 'What are you talking about?'

Luna and Tonks both looked away evasively, but were spared the trouble of answering by the entrance of none other than Pansy Parkinson.

'Hello all!' Pansy said cheerfully.

'You had a date with her?!?' Tonks hissed at Harry, as if she had only just realised what he had said earlier.

Harry rolled his eyes. 'Long story,' he whispered.

'What's a long story?' said Pansy, sitting down as close to Harry as she possibly could.

'Oh … nothing,' said Harry, trying to move his chair away without Pansy noticing.

'Well, I had an absolutely wonderful time the day before yesterday,' Pansy said airily. 'Henry and I were on a date, you see.' She gave Luna and Tonks a triumphant look, and giggled girlishly.

Luna got up from her chair. 'As much as I'd like to stay for the rest of this fascinating conversation – and believe me, I would – I'm afraid I have to get going to North Tower if I'm to have enough time to prepare my next lesson.'

'Oh, certainly, Luna,' Pansy said politely. 'Don't let us keep you here!'

Luna gave Harry a dreamy smile on her way out of the room. Harry turned to Tonks, with a slightly panicked expression.

'You're staying, aren't you, Tonks?' he said, looking pleadingly at her.

'You bet I am!' said Tonks, looking at Harry and Pansy with an expression of the utmost amusement. 'Nothing could make me leave.'

Harry sighed with relief. Pansy, however, was looking at Tonks with narrowed eyes. She was obviously not pleased that Tonks was staying. Ignoring Tonks, she turned to Harry and gave him her most charming smile.

'It was such a pity that you had to leave early on Saturday, Henry!' she exclaimed. 'I really enjoyed our conversation. You know, one Slytherin to another.' She turned to Tonks again. 'You weren't in Slytherin, were you, Tonks?'

'Certainly not,' said Tonks with a snort. She gave Harry an amused look.

'Well, I think one should always stick together with people from one's own house,' Pansy went on, looking annoyed. 'Don't you agree, Henry?'

'Er …' Harry – who had had no trouble whatsoever deceiving Pansy in The Leaky Cauldron only a few days ago – couldn't think of anything to say. But he didn't really have to; Pansy was perfectly capable of carrying on a conversation unassisted.

'Yes, Henry and I are the only Slytherins on the staff,' Pansy said, giving Tonks a superior look. 'Professor Snape's old disciples, aren't we, Henry?'

Tonks had been about to put a pile of essays into her briefcase, but dropped them on the floor instead, where they scattered all over the room. Harry bent down to pick them up, but Tonks made no motion to help him. She was staring at Pansy, with an ominous look in her eyes.

Considering Tonks's feelings towards Snape, this conversation had taken a dangerous turn, but Harry had no intention of changing the subject. He had almost forgotten what Pansy had said about Snape in The Leaky Cauldron; his thoughts had been occupied first with Ginny, and then with John. But he remembered it now, and he realised that this might be a golden opportunity to find out more. He sat up again and looked at Tonks, who looked as though she was ready to commit murder.

'You like Snape, do you Pansy?' she said, her voice shaking slightly.

'He was a good teacher,' Pansy said coolly.

'He's a traitor,' Tonks said in a low voice. 'And a murderer.'

'That's not quite true now, is it Tonks?' Pansy said jauntily.

'What's that supposed to mean?' Tonks snapped. 'Everybody knows that Snape killed dozens of people! Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Dumbledore … Remus Lupin …countless others.'

'Actually, you're not quite right there, Tonks.' Pansy toyed casually with a strand of her hair. 'Bellatrix Lestrange killed Ron Weasley. Lucius Malfoy killed Hermione Granger. And the Dark Lord himself killed Dumbledore and Lupin. It's never been proven that Snape actually killed anyone.'

Harry looked at Pansy in surprise. She seemed like such an empty-headed little fool, yet she was surprisingly well-informed in certain matters. Matters concerning Snape …

'No, he was too smart to get caught,' Tonks said bitterly. 'Kept his cover very well. But he would have killed Ginny Weasley if the Aurors hadn't showed up. And he performed the Cruciatus Curse on Minerva McGonagall until she went insane. You can't deny that – there were several witnesses.'

Pansy shrugged. 'Perhaps he just didn't like her.'

'So what are you saying, Pansy?' Tonks said with forced calm. 'That he's innocent?'

'Oh, I wasn't saying that at all.' Pansy gave an ill-timed, girlish laugh again. 'But haven't you ever wondered why he was sent to Azkaban without a trial?'

'No I haven't,' Tonks said coldly. 'Everyone knows why. The evidence was so overwhelming that there was no need for a trial.'

'Perhaps,' Pansy said carelessly. 'Or perhaps there was so little substantial evidence that, had the case ever gone to trial, there was no chance he'd have been found guilty.'

Tonks and Harry stared at Pansy, both utterly speechless. Pansy seemed to be enjoying the attention; she was about to go on, but was interrupted by a tapping sound on the window.

'What … oh, it's Pinky!' Pansy jumped up from her chair, and opened the window to let in a tawny owl. 'What are you doing here, my lovey-dovey?' she said in a silly voice, as she untied a letter from the owl's leg.

Harry looked at Tonks, who was sitting immobile on the other side of the table, staring into empty space with a stunned expression on her face. After a few moments, she roused herself, and began picking up essays from the floor. It looked like their conversation was over for the moment. Harry was slightly disappointed; he had hoped for more than this. He looked at Pansy again, who was still standing by the window, reading her letter with her mouth wide open.

'I don't believe it,' she whispered, seemingly unaware that Harry and Tonks could hear her. 'Fifteen years … I've waited fifteen years, and now it's finally happening. It's finally worked!'

'What, Pansy?' Tonks said irritably. 'Old Draco's finally asked you to marry him, has he?'

Pansy folded her letter and put it in her pocket. When she turned around to face Harry and Tonks again, her expression was no longer silly and girlish, as it had been throughout their conversation. She looked cold and calculating.

'You are naive, Tonks,' she said. 'So naive. One would think that after everything you've been through … but no. So naive.' Without any further comments Pansy left the staff room, slamming the door shut behind her.

Harry and Tonks were left standing on opposite sides of the table, staring at each other in shock, not sure what had just happened. After a few moments of silence, Tonks bent down to pick up the few essays that were left on the floor.

'I … I have to go to class now,' she said, sounding confused. 'But we'll talk about this later, Harry?'

'Yeah,' said Harry, running his hands through his smooth, magically lightened hair. 'Yeah, we most certainly will.'

Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed this. Now please review.