Disclaimer: I don't own them, I didn't create them, and I don't profit from them, but as always, coffee is on me if George and Jorja have the time.
Author's Note: Please note that this contains serious spoiler information for the season finale. If you read it, you read at your own risk. I have taken liberties with some of the information that I have gotten, but the general flow of things is true to the spoilers that I have read at YTDAW. Also, you can interpret the relationship between Nick and Sara any way you want, but I think these two characters share a deep connection and whether in your eyes it is just friendship or quite a bit more, I've left it open to your interpretation.
This is written from Sara's point of view:
It seems everyone around me is falling apart. I want to fall apart too, but I know I can't. At least one of us has to hold it together, and I refuse to lose it until we find Nick. The images coming through that live feed are just sickening. Not because there is anything physically wrong with him, but because as he spends more and more time inside that coffin, I wonder how in the world he's holding together.
Greg is a complete basket case. He wants to help but he's so distraught that he can't even focus on helping Mia process DNA. His hands shake every time he lifts a cup of coffee to take a sip and there's a part of me that wishes that someone would give him a sedative to calm him down, but I know that it really won't help. Nick is more than just a friend to him he's more like the brother he never had and Greg's outward emotional state is reflective of what we're all feeling inside.
Warrick isn't really doing much better, he's so worked up that he's not doing himself or Nick any good. I guarantee that if Warrick knew where Nick's abductor was he'd be hard pressed not to rip him limb from limb. He walks around with a clenched jaw; just barely keeping his normally laid back persona on an even keel. He knows that Nick's best hope is for us to work this case better than any case we've ever worked, but I think Warrick's taking on blame that isn't his. Ever since Holly died, Warrick has been protective of every member of this team. He knows that it just as easily could have been him if he hadn't convinced Catherine to let him switch cases. He doesn't know that I know that, but I heard him say something to her and she immediately chastised him gently, telling him that he couldn't have known.
I have seldom seen Catherine like she is right now, ready to fall apart one minute and steeling herself with resolve to find Nick in the next. She has very maternal feeling towards Nick and I think she holds herself responsible for assigning him the case, but then I think she also realizes that no matter which CSI had been assigned they would be right where Nick is right now.
Those images are so disturbing. I wish there was a way we could let Nick know that we are trying so hard to find him, to find the person that did this to him. I know that his parents will be here soon and I cannot even imagine what they must be going through. My whole experience with family is nothing like Nick's. As soon as Grissom called them, they were on the first plane out of Dallas, intent on selling everything they owned to make sure they got Nick back ok. I think I understand a sliver of that. In many ways, I feel like Nick is part of the only real family I've ever known the only group of people that have ever really cared about me. He's shown me more about how to be a real person while staying true to the job than I ever thought I could, than I ever realized I needed to.
The evidence just doesn't seem to be telling us anything and it's so frustrating. The crime scene Nick was sent to was a set up, and I think all of us have this feeling that we can't reconcile. None of us would want it to be us, and yet I think all of us would trade places with Nick in an instant.
I don't think I have ever seen Brass quite like this. He has always had a special connection with Nick, an almost fatherly connection, and I've seen him direct it at me as well. He is really broken up, this wizened, sardonic, caustic, cynical detective is almost as broken up about Nick as if he was his own son.
I don't really know what to say to Grissom. He's sitting in his office with his head in his hands waiting for Nick's parents to arrive. They should be here any minute and I think Ecklie himself went to airport to pick them up.
As if on cue, I turn and see a very distraught older couple walking with Conrad Ecklie down the corridor towards Grissom's office. There is no mistaking that this is Bill and Jillian Stokes. Nick looks so much like his father and he has his mother's eyes. I feel a lump in my throat that I'm not sure how to deal with. There is such love and concern in those eyes for a son that for all intents and purpose left Texas to get away from the Stokes name. I just don't think anyone would ever do for me what they're doing for Nick.
Somehow Grissom pulls himself together to greet Nick's parents. He has such a somber look on his face at first but then effortlessly shifts into his professional CSI mode as he leads them down to where we've all been monitoring the video feed. Bill Stokes' words, as he sees Nick over that feed for the first time, bring me the closest I've been to losing it since all of this started. "Oh what have you gotten yourself into, Poncho?" His use of Nick's boyhood nickname at a time like this makes me feel as if my heart is being ripped out. We need to find Nick and we need to find him now.
I can't help but feel a heightened sense of purpose and responsibility as Grissom introduces all of us to Nick's parents. For some reason their eyes linger on me a little longer and it makes me wonder what Nick has told them about me. I will do whatever it takes to find Nick. I cannot even consider the possibility that we won't find him that we might run out of time. I can't lose him, he's one of my closest friends and I don't know if he realizes that I feel like he's the only family I have.
I don't know why it surprises me that Ecklie has taken such a personal interest in this case to the extent that he's told us that this is the only case the lab is working on right now. I guess that Nick has affected more people than I can imagine, but then again, he has that easy way about him and people are naturally drawn to him.
It's several hours later when we hear from Nick's abductor again, and it's chilling to hear the voice of this man that could be so cold as to take this person that we all see as being so precious to us and do such a horrible thing to him. Grissom is going to go meet him to give them the ransom that Nick's parents have provided. I'm still incredulous that they would be willing to sell everything they own for Nick.
The ransom drop doesn't go well. It was a complete set up. Nick wasn't there and Grissom was injured when the abductor set off a bomb and killed himself in the process. I don't know whether I should be thankful that Grissom was just banged up in the face of the fact that we still don't know where Nick is. The only person who could lead us to Nick is now dead and we don't seem to be any closer to figuring out where he is.
I think that there are those moments in life where when everything around you is in utter chaos that you can experience the most clarity and I think that's when I realized that I knew where Nick was. I'm not sure exactly how I knew, but I did, and it was so obvious. And now time is of the essence; he has air down there, but it's got to be hot and uncomfortable and if it were me I'd be completely distraught and freaking out.
I'm not sure the rest of them believe that I know where he is, but at this point it's all we have. For the first time since this ordeal started I feel the beginning of emotion that won't be pushed down; we've located the air hose leading down to where Nick is. And as we dig, one after the other, we yell out to let him know that we're coming that we're going to get him out.
Then there it is. The top of the horrible casket, there is no time to be gentle about this as we open it up and as I see Nick's face, I lose it. Tears stream down my face as I realize that he doesn't look good, but he's still alive and all I can think about is that I don't think I could have lived if something had happened to him.
I can hear Grissom on the phone with Ecklie instructing him to bring Nick's parents to Desert Palm as the paramedics prepare to extricate Nick from the casket.
I don't know why I'm sobbing exactly while everyone else is jubilant that we've found him. As Nick is loaded onto a gurney, he sees me and I see his brow furrow. I can tell that his throat is dry by the harsh whisper of his voice as I step towards him. "Oh, Sara, don't cry, it's gonna be ok."
Here in this horrible moment in typical Nick fashion he's thinking of someone other than himself and I just can't stop sobbing. Before anyone tells me I can't, I climb into the ambulance with him and just hold onto his hand as the paramedics try and get an IV going to rehydrate him. Neither one of us says anything. I'm looking at him and he's looking at me and the paramedics are working furiously as they speed through traffic. As soon as we get to the hospital he's whisked away and I'm just standing there all alone in a daze.
It's much later after the confusion and mayhem at the hospital has died down that I get to see him again. I tentatively enter his room and his parent glance up as I do. Nick is smiling and beckons me to come over to him. I think I feel a sense of embarrassment intruding on his family as Nick takes my hand in his as I sit on the edge of the bed. There are questions in the eyes of Bill and Jillian, but there is also something else there that puts me at ease and makes me feel welcome.
"I'm glad you're ok." I look at Nick intently, there is so much I want to tell him but words just seem woefully inadequate.
Nick looks so grateful and his voice wavers as he speaks. "I knew I could count on you to find me." His look speaks volumes and a tear slips down his cheek.
Nick's mother Jillian envelopes me in a hug and his dad Bill is slightly more restrained, taking one of my hands in his and giving it a squeeze.
I once didn't know what a real family was. And then I thought I'd lost the only family I did have. Now I know that no matter what happens, I will always be a part of the Stokes family.
The End
