Hi people, I have returned.

Now I know what you're all thinking –"damn it".

Eh don't blame you.

Anyway this is the repost of emotionless (because deleted it)… I've just changed it. ...Till its basically a new fic… how did this happen?

Very sorry I just hated the first version ¬¬… I'll be quiet.

Anyway this is NOT a death fic.

Disclaimer- I do not own beyblade; if I did it would be on a later time and Mariah would've been killed in the cruellest way possible.

Warning- attempted suicide and yaoi… again this is not a death fic.

Also I want to thank grEMLin evil who made me want to write again, you're a sweet button of doom.

Kai p.o.v

I can't understand how I can ever be accused of ever being emotionless.

I can feel hatred for this world, towards myself can't I? Isn't that enough?

Apparently not…

I feel scared sometimes. Mainly scared of rejection.

Its happened so many times before why would it have to stop now I'm around other people? I'm sure they'd reject me to if they weren't so afraid of me.

Rei. He'd reject me if he ever found out about some of the things I want to do and say to him.

"Yes, I love you Rei." I murmur happily.

I guess I'm pretty pathetic- yes; yes the "great" Kai is afraid of another human being.

Heh what would my grandfather say now-

"Another beating for you young Kai Hiwatari."?

Ah yes. That would be it. The pain. The beatings. The scars I now carry because of it.

Normal p.o.v.

The blunette sighed happily, lying in the bathtub. The water now dyed red from the blood spilling out from the teen.

His naked body half sunken under the red liquid, his chest –upwards- could be seen along with his knees. The rest just remained under the water.

-Flashback-

"If I'm gonna do this might as well do it so I have no second chance." His face twisted into a sickening grin as he finished carving the letters into his flesh. Kissing the wound softly he picked up the blade again. Dragging it harshly along the flesh ripping and hollowing out the artery.

His smiled faded slightly.

Maybe they're right -"emotionless" he mouthed his eyes looking empty and lifeless.

This doesn't hurt.

Looking down to the blood that begun to spill out of his fore arm.

He shrugged it off. Turned the tap off, and stepped slowly into the bath ignoring the numbing pain the cold water left behind.

-End-

"Red is such a beautiful colour isn't it?" he asked himself out loud. Letting the stained water drip few his fingers as he studied it.

"I'm so tided. And happy? Heh there's a change." He grinned and his head slumped onto his shoulder. His eyes shut gently. As his body stilled. And he didn't move again.

Knock knock

"Hey Kai?" came Kenny's voice threw the other side of the bathroom door.

No reply.

"Kai I'm gonna come in if you don't answer... you've been in for a lot longer then you normally take…which is like 10 seconds..." he murmured the last part under his breath.

Still no reply.

He gulped slightly and pushed open the door.

"Hey Kai?" Asked the small brunette as he begun to walk into the bathroom. "You didn't escape from the windo- HOLY SHIT! KAI!"

He screamed as he rushed to the bathtub hauling out the blunette's lifeless body.

To be continued…

This was really short…

Again with my usual -please don't flame me.