Summary:… yeah…some things are better off not knowing (I can't tell you, I don't know yet… isn't that sad)
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto…yet… that is until the drugs I put in everyone's drinks start to work…heh heh heh Then you'll all believe me when I say that I own them…You'll be putty in my hands… and Sasuke and Naruto slaves in my….remember what I said about you'd be better off not knowing…
Chapter 9- Hyperventilation is fun…not really…
Sasuke had one bitching headache…Scratch that, this was the motherfucker of all migraines! It felt like he was being beaten about the head with a frying pan, and there was something trying to claw its way out of his head at the same time. He tried to reach up and rub his temples when he discovered that…THAT HE WAS CHAINED TO A FUCKIN' HOSPITAL BED!
"Ah, I see you've woken up!" Tsunade-sama said as she walked in to check on the hyperventilating boy.
"Gasp wheeze gasp wheeze!"
"You're being very talkative today" she joked.
"Gasp wheeze gasp wheeze!"
"…"
"Gasp wheeze gasp wheeze gasp wheeze"
"Sasuke, are you alright?"
"Gasp wheeze"
And then a realization hit her like a speeding truck… "Aw shit! Somebody get me some tranquilizers quick!"
There was a rush of movement as several med-nins hurried to take care of the problem and a needle was jabbed into the Uchiha's arm.
"Gasp wheeze gasp…gasp…gasp…snore"
"Well, I wonder what started that?"
"Hey Naru-chan!" growled an easily recognizable voice.
"Hello Sakura- chan." Replied Naruto. 'Naru-chan…what the fuck!'
"Is it really true that you drugged Sasuke, dragged him into a corner and beat him with a garden gnome, AND THEN tried to blame it all on him?" Sakura's voice had taken on a tone that promised excruciating pain no matter what his answer was.
"Hell no! Why would I do that?" Naruto hollered.
"Maybe because you're jealous of him?"
"What the fuck, why would I be jealous of that teme!"
"Because everyone likes him better than you, and I chose him over you! That's why!"
"… sure…"
"What do you mean by that? Don't you care if I like you or not?" Sakura screeched, obvious that she was near a mental breakdown. It would seem that although she didn't like Naruto, she enjoyed his attentions.
"No"
Sakura looked at him like a cow looks at an oncoming train (go weird al!). Her world was crashing down upon her pink little head and there was nothing she could do about it. Tears started to form in her eyes, but this had no effect whatsoever.
"You mean you don't like me any more?"
Naruto turned around and looked at her with the most serious look she had ever seen on his face, "Well, you should know how it feels, hanging on to something that will never happen. It really starts to hurt after a while… well, I'll be seeing you around."
Naruto had said something mature…. What the fluck! Was this the apocalypse or something? Poor Sakura, she had just been rejected by the one and only person she thought would love her forever, and now she was depressed. Where was Lee-san when you need him? (as a matter of fact, at this very moment he was out in the woods of Konoha challenging a horde of angry flesh eating wombats to further prefect some random taijutsu…lets just say that this one didn't turn out very well…eh-heh…)
Naruto really did like Sakura before. He would have done anything for the kind of attention she gave Sasuke. But then the infatuation wore off and he saw her for what she really was, selfish, shallow, and egotistical, and she doesn't give a damn about anyone but herself. "Well, I guess it's about time to go check on Sasuke…"
Sasuke woke up again, but this time less violently, and surrounded by med-nins ready to pump him full of drugs at a moments notice. He decided against repeating the earlier incident, for he wanted answers.
"A-hem" Sasuke to get the Hokage's attention, who was chatting with Kakashi-sensei at the door to his room.
"You're late again" Tsunade glared at the erratic sensei.
"Well, you see, I was abducted by these giant mutated alien beavers and then locked in a…"
"Enough! I don't need to hear your ridiculous excuses!"
"But I haven't gotten to the part about the anal-probing yet!" whined Kakashi.(thanks hogo-chan!)
"…"
If there is anything that could clear out a room faster than the speed of light it was the previous statement, and yes I am speaking from experience.
Tsunade just blinked in his general direction… what the hell was wrong with this boy? Seriously, what is this man smoking?
"Umm … Am I interrupting anything?" Naruto asked quietly as he walked through the door.
"Well you see I was just…"
"You don't want to know," stated Tsunade, stopping Kakashi from emotionally scarring the boy forever.
"Oh…okay then, how is Sasuke-teme?"
"I'm fine dobe."
"Oh dear, Sasuke, you're awake" Tsunade said, while secretly worried that Sasuke would repeat the earlier incident.
"DON'T CALL ME DOBE, TEME!" Naruto lightened the mood by being his normal weird self.
"Shut up dobe, we're on a hospital."
"…"
"…"
"…umm, we're not in a hospital…"
"What do you mean by that?" Sasuke
"Hehehe… That you're not in a hospital…hehehe you're in a…a psychiatric care center…Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!"
"Gasp wheeze gasp wheeze"
"Not again!" Tsunade yelled.
"Gasp… what do you mean 'not again'?"
"You don't remember?"
"Remember what?"
"It"
glares
"You don't remember anything?"
glares
"Anything at all?"
glares
"How about how you got here?"
glares
Tsunade-sama shared a suspicious look with Naruto and both started laughing hysterically.
'What the hell is going on'?
glares
"Aaaaaaaaaaanything at all? You sure?"
glares
Sasuke officially feared for his life… well maybe not for his life… maybe for his well being, he was altogether too sure that they'd leave him alive.
"So then… heh heh… you don't remember anything that happened… ha ha ha… yesterday…snork"
"Well then I guess… He he he … I cant believe this! This is gonna make this SO much more fun" smirked Tsunade
' And now I can avenge Jasper!' thought Naruto.
"Isn't that funny, because yesterday a little birdie told me that…" continued Tsunade.
Rants- O my gawd, its been sooooo friggin' long! I can't believe it ….Damn the horrible disease that is writers block! … and the fact that our school musical primers in, like, 2 days…I've been so busy…and sleep deprived, but that's another story…PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE REVIEW! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! I NEED YOUR INPUT/ ENCOURAGEMENT/ WHATEVER! REEEEEEEEEEVIEW!
