Disclaimer: I don't own anything! Really! I promise!

Warning: Angst

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Left Alone
A letter

I miss you so much... It's autumn now and It's been a year sins last time we talked to each other... I still don't understand... What did I do to make you leave me like that? I wish you would tell me... Even thought I don't know what I did wrong... I am truly sorry, I miss you so much. Why can't you come back to me? We could start all over again, if you want to?

Right now I'm sitting by our big window, watching the yellow leaves fall from the big tree outside... You know, I'm still thinking of this window as ours... The memory of sitting here together are still so fresh... Do you remember the time after that snowball-fight we had, that time when you made us hot chocolate? It was snowing outside... And when you complained that it was so cold in here? We took a blanket from the closet and just sat in the window, watching the snow sail down from the darkened sky... But I guess they are just what they are... Memories from a happier time.

That day when you told me you were leaving, I said it didn't matter, you weren't even around... After you left me I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I cried every night when I found your bedside empty... Sometimes when I wake up, before I open my eyes, I say to myself that you are just downstairs, making tea or something. But every time when I am about to kiss you god-morning, you are gone again and I can't found you anywhere... It's hurting more everyday.

You remember Angel? The kitten you got for me the weeks before you left... She died two days later... She got hit by a car... It's so quiet here, and I'm so alone... But I'm happy for you, I'm happy because you now are happy... But I can't help missing you. I just hope that you have found a better life... My 'better life' is just now a memory. A memory I'll never forget. But you maybe want me to forget? So you can forget..?

It took a while to get your address, I'm not keeping it, so you don't have to worry... I will forget you, just not now.

I've been sitting here all day, thinking of you. Did you found another to love? I hope so... I can't find another... I closed the door the day you left. My heart is only for you... But I don't think you want it back... It's broken...

I just wrote this to you to say that I'm slowly fading away from the world... And when I'm gone, I will forget you... I promise.

When I am dead and gone to hell, I don't deserve to go to heaven, not after making you angry... I will watch you fly to the light sky and I will smile, smile because you will live in a place where everyone is loved... I don't have anyone waiting for me in heaven... Not anymore...

I love you Tala, and I hope you live a happy life now, you deserve it.

It's a big world now without you, but I will forget, for you... I love you... Good bye... Forever...

Kai
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Just tell me if you want me to continue...

Ja ne...