A.N. Yeah, second chapter! WOOT!

Welcoming the Light

Chapter 2- Where is it I am going?

I wonder, where is it we are going now? Trees have passed by the windows so many times, I feel so groggy, like waking up from a dream. His face smiles at me and familiar feelings creep up on me. I know he's drugged me for the ride, he knows how I feel about visiting this forest. Strangely I don't mind it, I know it's not the drugs. I have nothing left in the forest anyway, only painful memories.

I can't help but wonder if she misses me, if she's alive, do any of them miss me? I suppose I'll never know, and I guess I don't mind. I don't even know how long it's been since I died and was brought back. It's too painful. I don't even want to remember the bringing back. I can't stand what the price is.

I want to ask where we are going, but I feel too tired to do so. My body feels a million pounds heavier it seems. His hand gently pushed some of my hair from my face. His touch is warm, just like mine used to be. Now I'm cold. He and Shiboo tell me I'll be cold for a while until I can reconcile with what happened. Touma comments that every day my skin grows warmer as I come to terms with his other self's death, and mine too. So many people have left me. There is a war in my head now. Painful, it is.

Once again I want to ask where we are going as trees are beginning to thin out and melt into large buildings. A city, I realize. A big city full of people. A shudder, I can feel it. I don't like people, I never have and I don't think I ever will.

"Where…" my voice comes out a croak and my ears flatten of their own accord. Touma smiles almost sadly and yet almost happily at the same time. He looks so different as he is. Older, like me.

He and I, it feels strange to say, are so much more different now. Some would call us demons, others angels of death. Maybe even Nightwalkers. But the humorous thing is that we walk in both sunlight and moonlight. Though no longer are we particularly fond of the sunlight, it is fine with us both, it just burns a little and it can give us a nasty sunburn. We can cope and adjust if we have to.

A distant cry of wolves reaches my sensitive ears. They're returning to their dens. A whimper escapes as we leave them behind. I miss them, and Touma knows this. He pets me like he used to. He uses his affectionate pet name for me. Just like old times.

With a frown I notice the light sleeping drug is wearing off, which in turn causes little shards of pain to ebb through my growing stomach. I stare down at the oversized bulb in wonder. Lord knows how many times I'd asked him if I was fat. He'd just say I looked fine to him.

Goodness, whatever little angel is in there has a nasty kick. Touma notices my hand there, and he smile, gently caressing my cheek. I wonder, is this what true happiness feels like?

No.

True happiness is having friends to back you up. True love is here, it is me and Touma, but I can never be happy without my friends. A nagging question continues to linger as I feel myself awaken. I wish Shiboo hadn't passed the border between the two worlds so soon, I miss her.

"Where are we going?" I can hear myself mumble groggily. Touma kind of just laughs a bit, hands moving around on the steering wheel. His eyes sparkle with light. I can only just stare at him a moment before turning my attention out the window and smiling myself. A surprise then, interesting.

"You'll see Kitten." He addresses softly, continuing his carefree driving throughout the city. I almost envy his carefree nature. But I know it's just because he's happy, and that is intoxicating. I can feel my spirits lift with his. Tiredness envelops me in its gentle embrace so suddenly once more. I let my eyes slide closed. I can feel my tail twitch a bit as I adjust my hearing range to a normal human's range. Touma is lucky; he doesn't have to go through that hindrance when he goes through wild areas. It's an instinct I guess. I'll live.

I still want to know where we're going.

********

Mitsuko sighed and once again let her head rest on her hands. Had it only been weeks ago since she'd been reawakened? She looked out the restaurant window. Her break was almost over, and then she'd step in for 003. Working in 006's restaurant helped eased the heavy burdens on her shoulders. It had only been a few days ago that she'd come out of the deep depression she had first collapsed in. Since then, working helped so much.

But as usual 0015 spoke not a word to 003 as she took her place in the back corner of the kitchen for her own break. But 003 did. She waved and smiled cheerfully, murmuring a soft comment that fell on deaf ears as 0015 made her way out into the main part of the restaurant. Her job was to bus tables and wash dishes for the main part. One of the other hired waitresses took orders.

I may not like the work, but it s something to do. Mitsuko would mentally sighed to herself as she did the menial task. She wasn't complaining, but she wasn't skipping and scream for joy either. She was in an in between place, numb like she'd come to be. Not joyful and jubilant as she might have been if…if… she couldn't bear to think about it least she collapse into a fit of crying right here in the middle of the restaurant in front of all the customers. No, she mustn't make a scene.

In an unassuming way, 0015 made her way around the tables, taking away dishes to wash later while setting it up for new customers. She tried quite hard, and managed to push away all other thoughts. That is how she lived now. Always…

0015 continued to do this monotonous task for hours, not realizing time. To her hours were minutes and her work was life. She had to work. Work to push away the pain, work to push away the grief, and most of all-work to push away the guilt. It wasn't a good life; in fact it was very tiring.

But she owed that much to Cloud and Touma. All her earthly pain and more. So much more. 

Thus 0015 was startled when a gentle hand was laid on her shoulder. So startled in fact, she nearly dropped the dish she was washing. Idly she wondered just how she got into the kitchen, but she brushed it off.

"Mitsuko?" 003, Françoise, asked gently, her greenish blue eyes open and shinning with concern. 0015 blinked sleepily and then smiles a little. It is a sign they share, and 003 took it as 'sorry, I was in my doze again, ha ha ha! My bad'. So much out of a simple smile…

"It's almost closing time." There is a secret sort of smile in 003's eyes as she looks at 0015, as bright and joyful as ever. She and Joe made a perfect couple, Mitsuko realized. Their wedding had been some time ago.

When she was dead.

But she still saw the video tape of it. It had been a beautiful wedding. Flowers of all kinds, a lovely dress, so beautiful. Everything was beautiful. Except her. Ugly, ugly, ugly! Mitsuko would shout at herself whenever she passed by a mirror. For she felt it was true. She was stained with blood and death. Many times she wished they hadn't cared so much about her. She wished they'd just let her die.

What is the difference now? She'd liked to demand. I'm never going to speak again, so why have me around? I wont talk to you, I wont!

TBC

A.N. Oh dear, Mitsuko (0015 for those with poor memory) is spiraling downhill and doesn't realize her friends are alive. And in case you can't guess, what they are will be revealed next chapter ^^