Notes: Because someone out there thinks I don't like Ron. Okay, so I've given him a bum rap more than once. I've read stories where he's been hunted down like an animal, tortured, beaten within an inch of his life, and left for dead. The worst I've done to Ron is had Kim mad at him, and they got over that. I daresay I've treated him better (or at least more gently) than others have. But just so I don't completely alienate the Ron lovers, I did this additional chapter, which serves as a nice lead-in for my upcoming series ALL ABOUT RON (and Tara & Bionic Bonnie).
Ron, In Reverse
A Kim Possible Fanfic by
Nate Grey (XMAN0123-at-aol-dot-com)
"Maybe we should be nicer to Bonnie."
It was such an odd statement coming from his best friend that Ron had to put down his chimmerito and give her a good looking over. She didn't LOOK crazy, at least; just more thoughtful, and perhaps just a wee bit guilty.
Rufus was just as confused, because he darted up Kim's arm to her shoulder, where he pressed a tiny paw against her forehead, searching for fever heat. Finding none, he turned to Ron and shrugged.
"What brought this on, KP?" Ron asked, sensing that this might be serious.
Throwing an uneasy glance over her shoulder, Kim quickly gave him an edited, five-minute version of what Tara had told her earlier. She left out phrases like "suicide" and "end it all," but Ron was able to determine what she meant she described Bonnie as being "very, VERY depressed."
"Wow," Ron said softly. "Bonnie? I can't believe it. She's always so…"
"Surly?" Kim offered.
Ron frowned at her. "I was going to say full of life."
"You're being generous," Kim countered. "She's mean and she treats people like dirt. It's just weird to think that she might feel that way herself. Or that someone like Tara would see the good in her."
"Not really. She saw the good in me that time at Camp Wannaweep." He even managed to say the dreaded name without shuddering…much.
Kim smiled faintly. "You did save the day and all. Heroes are supposed to get the girl."
"I bet you'd settle for Josh Mankey, though," Ron replied, just barely dodging as Kim threw a balled-up napkin at him. "What? You'd prefer a girl instead of a free ride next time?"
"Don't make me come over there, Ron Stoppable. I had to restrain myself with Bonnie today, and I could use an outlet to vent all this frustration. You're looking more and more like the best person for the job."
"Does this mean we're going to the gym so you can kick me for an hour again? Because that's not as much fun as it might seem."
"I have fun," Kim pointed out. "Don't you?"
"At least Bonnie's insults don't hurt the next morning."
"Just think of it as my way of toughening you up," Kim suggested.
"Yeah. I can see how Shego might break her fingers when she punches one of my scabs of steel."
"You can't think I enjoy hurting you?" Kim asked, blinking at him. "Ron, those are love taps compared to what Shego would do, or what I'd use on her!"
Ron winced. "Well, I gotta say, KP, I wish you didn't love me so much. And how come I never get to express my 'love' for you, huh?"
Kim grinned. "Oh, we don't need to do that. I know you love me. It's why you let me kick you. Besides, you couldn't hit me if you tried."
"You think so, huh?" Ron raised a fist, only to be hit full force with- "ARGH! Not the puppy-dog pout!"
"Told you," Kim giggled.
"Someday, I'm going to find a counterattack for that, and THEN you'll be sorry!"
"Sure. But until then, our next stop is the gym."
"Aw, man…"
Almost overnight, Bonnie had grown to resent the fact that she had a six-foot shadow.
She'd been used to it for the longest time, of course. Cheerleaders always dated jocks, and the more popular ones usually came in taller packages. Brick Flagg was no exception, but as Tara had pointed out more than once, many jocks, Brick included, were good for little more than keeping the sun off of Queen Bonnie's back. And since she was currently inside, all Brick had managed to do was give her serious personal space issues.
Unfortunately, he was not so easy to get rid of. Tara had made the mistake of allowing Brick to overhear that Bonnie "was going through a rough time, and needed support." And so the shadow service had begun in earnest, with most of the jocks probably thinking that Bonnie would literally collapse if she didn't have some solid, hulking mass behind her at all times.
In truth, Bonnie's "rough time" had passed with little incident, as far as she was concerned. She'd been seeing a psychiatrist for nearly a week now, and had thoroughly convinced her that the episode had been a one-time error in judgment and nothing more. She had fielded every other offer of concern in her usual way: unless you got paid to console troubled people, Bonnie didn't want to hear it.
There had been no such offers from Kim Possible, of course. Bonnie hadn't expected them, either, and Kim hadn't let her down in that department. Although she was quite puzzled by the way Kim had been unwilling to trade insults with her anymore. Sure, she'd hit a momentary rough spot, but she was past it now, and surely Kim knew that. But the redhead continued to pass her in the halls without a word, barely even a glance most days. And if it had been out of spite, Bonnie would've welcomed it. But she had a disturbing feeling that it might actually be out of pity, and that was the last thing she wanted from Kim.
You didn't pity rivals, you kicked them when they were down, then pointed and laughed. But even that was losing its appeal, since Kim's only reaction to such treatment now was a blank stare and a hasty exit.
All of which left Bonnie in a sour mood, compounded by the fact that Tara had an early doctor's appointment and wouldn't be in school until after lunch. Which meant that the only company she had until then was Brick, which also identified the contents of his head quite well, Bonnie decided.
He was still blathering about something when Bonnie closed her locker, turned around, and began to tell him for the third time that her stating "Back off, bonehead" didn't mean take three steps back, it meant leave her the hell alone.
That was when she spotted Ron Stoppable.
Normally, this wouldn't really have meant anything…except that Stoppable was clearly headed straight for them, though Bonnie couldn't even begin to imagine why. She'd heard Brick brag about stuffing him in lockers or putting more craters in his face than the moon, and surely Stoppable had enough sense to know that you didn't go anywhere near Brick Flagg if he took even a passing interest in rearranging your face.
Well, at one time such a thing might've been entertaining to Bonnie. But lately, senseless violence was just boring to her, and she knew Brick would pound Stoppable just for walking past them. What amazed her was that HE didn't seem to know that, or care, anyway.
She almost grabbed Brick's arm (which would no doubt only further doom her to his continued presence) and dragged him away, but before she could turn thought into action, Stoppable strode up, and to her shock, stopped in plan sight of them both.
"Hey, Bonnie, Brick. Nice morning we're having, isn't it?" And with that usual lopsided grin, no less.
He was a dead man.
Brick began to crack his knuckles, an ominously loud sound in the mostly empty hallway. "I see I didn't pound enough sense into you last time, Stoppable."
The grin faded a bit, but only enough to become slightly crooked now. "Hey now, there's no need to get violent, Brick. I was just saying good morning." He began to say something else, his eyes shifting to Bonnie, but that was when Brick's meaty fist caught him in the jaw, with enough force to send him slamming against the lockers.
A horribly empty feeling rose in Bonnie's stomach, and she started to tell Brick to cool it, that Stoppable wasn't worth it. Brick may have been a brainless oaf, but if he thought a fight would upset Bonnie in the slightest, Stoppable might still be able to walk away from this without a black eye.
Actually, he just might be able to walk away, period.
Only Stoppable didn't have the usual reaction that most people did after getting hit by Brick. He blinked, and for a mere second, Bonnie saw something like murderous rage in his eyes. But then, in an instant, it was gone, and Stoppable worked his mouth, trying to make sure his jaw was still in place.
Brick took that as further insult, and swung again.
The only problem being that Stoppable had long since moved. Bonnie hadn't seen him move, so much as there was a reddish blur of motion, and suddenly, Stoppable was between them, staring at Brick's back. It was the perfect chance to kick Brick in the crotch, or to flat out run like mad.
Naturally, Stoppable just stood there, and when Brick turned around, Bonnie could see that the rage was now in his eyes.
"Oh, you are SO dead," Brick muttered, cocking back his fist again.
The funny thing about Mystical Monkey Power, Ron was starting to find out, was that it sometimes chose the wrong time to surface. Surrounded by a hundred monkey ninjas bent on his destruction, now THAT was the perfect time for some monkey magic.
But against a blockhead like Brick, there was no real point. This was the natural order of things. Jocks dated cheerleaders and beat up outcasts. It was just what they did, what they had always done. And Ron had always taken his beatings with as much dignity as he could.
To upset Brick by laying him flat in the hall would turn the natural order upside down. It just didn't happen. It would also draw too much attention to Ron, especially where the other jocks were concerned. Then he'd have to fight them all off, and end up using the monkey magic again. And again. And again, until there was no difference between monkey ninjas and jocks for him, and then he would start using it on just anyone who upset him in the slightest. Then, he'd be no different from Monkey Fist.
The problem was that Mystical Monkey Power didn't have an on/off switch. Ron liked to think of himself as a bottomless well. Each punch was just a drop, and he could take plenty. That was before the monkey magic, though. Now, it only took a single drop to fill the entire well, and when it was full, the beast came out.
Or it would've, if Ron had been so inclined to let it run wild all over Brick's face. Instead, he held it back as much as he could, because if Brick saw the beast, it could very well end up being the last thing he saw with two eyes. However, Mystical Monkey Power had a way of leaking through his fingers. Maybe he wouldn't take Brick's head off, but his body was insisting on not taking any additional hits if it couldn't return them, and he had little choice but to listen.
So when Brick's fist began to rush at his face again, Ron was well out of the way. And suddenly found out that he was just too fast for his own good.
He was now beside Brick, which gave him a great view of where Brick's fist would end up.
Buried in Bonnie Rockwaller's face.
Even if Ron hadn't remembered Kim's "be nicer to Bonnie" speech, he wouldn't have let the punch land. Bonnie was a cheerleader, after all, and people would notice if she'd taken one of Brick's fists to the face. Aside from that, she was incredibly vain, and any damage to her face might cause her to do something drastic.
Again.
And while Ron didn't consider himself Bonnie's number one fan, he couldn't let Brick hit her. Not when it could very well send her into a downward spiral that she might not ever recover from.
It wouldn't have taken much effort to simply grab Brick's fist and bring it to a halt. But he'd already used lightning speed once, and he didn't want to add superhuman strength to the mix; one of them might notice. There was really only one solution.
Ron sighed and stepped back into the path of Brick's fist, as if he'd never left it, lining up his face just right, before shutting his eyes.
It didn't really hurt, not backed by monkey magic as he was. It was, in fact, much more difficult to keep from breaking Brick's arm in every possible way. But Ron was used to suppressing such urges, so he thought he had a good handle on it.
So when something that felt like steel smacked his right elbow, sending his fist flying out to land a wild blow in Brick's stomach, he could do little more than stare in shock as Brick let out a low moan and dropped to the floor, banging his head on the lockers along the way.
Ron wasn't sure what had gone wrong, but he was suddenly intensely aware of Bonnie's head resting lightly against his neck, and her hands on his left shoulder and right elbow. It was not an unpleasant sensation, just a very unexpected one.
"Uh…Bonnie?" he asked quietly. "You okay?"
"Need a…minute," Bonnie murmured softly, her breath tickling his neck. "Shouldn't have…" She trailed off and began to sink slowly to the floor.
Ron whirled around grabbed her by the waist. "What's wrong, Bon-Bon? You don't look so good." He paused for a moment, considering the inaccuracy of that statement. Bonnie ALWAYS looked good, even when she was panting and sweating like she was now. Actually, ESPECIALLY when she was panting and sweating like she was now. But this didn't seem to be the good kind of panting and sweating, if the paleness of Bonnie's normally tan skin was any indicator.
Bonnie still had a bit of spirit left, because she scowled at Ron and tried to push him away. "Leggo…'m fine…" She lacked her usual strength, both in the force of her words and physically, so neither did much good.
"Okay, for the sake of argument, let's say you are. So if I let go, you should be fine." Ron let go.
Bonnie swayed uncertainly on her feet, and then pitched forward, right back into Ron's waiting arms.
Ron shook his head and smirked. "Either you're not fine, or you're crushing on me hard. Which is it?"
Bonnie turned a brilliant shade of red and muttered something completely unintelligible.
Ron had a feeling he wouldn't have wanted to hear it, anyway. "If you don't even have the strength to deliver insults clearly, no way you're fine." Without really thinking about it, he scooped Bonnie up into his arms (despite her weak, mumbled protests) and headed for the nurse's office. She was much lighter than he'd expected, either due to his monkey magic-induced strength or Bonnie's severe dieting habits.
There was really only one thing that bothered him. He'd barely felt Brick's last punch, but his elbow was throbbing like crazy.
By the time they reached the nurse's office, Bonnie stopped questioning why Stoppable had helped her. She was now officially of the opinion that he was one of those simple idiots who had no trouble helping his enemies. A very fast one when times called for it, but still a simple idiot.
It only took a few minutes for the nurse to proclaim Bonnie too exhausted to begin the school day, much less finish it (which Bonnie had already known). She was ordered to go home at once, though she was not to drive herself.
But Bonnie immensely enjoyed the freedom that driving her own car provided, and she wasn't about to give it up just because some nurse told her to. At least, that's what she was thinking when she emerged from the nurse's office, only to run right into Stoppable again.
"Bon-Bon! You're okay?" he asked anxiously, actually having the audacity to look concerned.
"What do you care, Stoppable?" she snapped.
"If I didn't care, I would've left you on the floor with Brickhead," Ron pointed out. "It sounds like you're back to normal, at least. So what'd the nurse say?"
"None of your business. You did your good deed, now get out of my face."
Ron grinned. "Ex-squeeze me? That is good deed number TWO, Bon-Bon. First I saved you from a guaranteed black eye, and then I carried you to the nurse. Which means you owe me."
Bonnie opened her mouth to disagree, then decided against it. "Fine. But make it quick. I am not wasting any more of my free day on you than I have to."
"You got out of school? You must really be not okay, then." Ron shot her that lopsided grin again. "In that case, allow me the honor of escorting you to your chariot, milady," he said, bowing grandly.
"Yeah, whatever," Bonnie muttered. "Just make sure you walk at least twenty steps behind me at all times."
"No can do, Bon-Bon. You pass out again, I'm gonna need to be within ten steps to keep you from denting that pretty little head of yours."
"Not from what I saw earlier," Bonnie noted, walking off.
Ron ran to catch up with her. "I'm sure I have no idea what you mean."
"Uh huh. Like super speed is standard among dorks."
Ron blinked. "Uh…super speed?" He forced a nervous laugh. "That's crazy, Bonnie! You're crazy!"
"Oh, I don't think so. And I think Brick would agree with me, once he wakes up. Of course, he'd agree with me, anyway, but-"
Without warning, Ron leaped into her path. "Listen, Bonnie, it wasn't super speed! I've just been training with KP, and it's paying off! That's it, I swear!"
"Much as I don't like her, I might be inclined to believe you…except that I've never even seen her move that fast. Face it, Stoppable: you're busted."
Ron was just about to start begging her not to tell when something hit him. "Hey, wait a sec. I wasn't the only one pulling super stunts this morning!"
"Now who's talking crazy?" Bonnie asked.
But Ron was looking certain now. "Something hit my elbow HARD, and made me hit Brick. Funny how your hand was on my elbow right after that, huh? And I bet that's why you nearly fainted right after! You can't control it completely!"
"You can't prove anything," Bonnie said confidently, starting to step around him.
"That's where you're wrong," Ron replied as he deftly stuck his foot between her legs.
She was falling before she realized it, but not before she could do something about it. Her hands hit the floor first, saving her from a very nasty bruise. Her eyes narrowed as she angrily leaped to her feet. "You jerk! When I'm done with you-!"
"I'll be in the same condition as that poor floor?" he asked innocently.
Bonnie glanced down and gasped. There were two small but obvious hand-shaped craters in the floor. She'd used her powers without even realizing it, and had pushed right through the tile.
"Call me crazy, Bon-Bon, but that's not standard for cheerleaders, not even for THE cheerleader. And since you used two hands instead of one this time, I'd guess you're going limp in 3, 2, 1…"
She wanted to slug him, but he was right; she was already weaving on her feet. It occurred to her that she might not be able to make it home in this condition. She could pass out behind the wheel, or her reaction time might be too slow to avoid other cars. Of course, to do any of that, she first had to GET to her car, and that was looking like a pretty bad prospect from where she stood (for the moment).
Ron caught her before she could topple into the lockers. "I suggest we call a temporary truce, so we can form a compromise of sorts."
"What do you want, Stoppable?" Bonnie asked, without much of her usual venom in the words.
"Neither of us says anything to anyone about what happened today. At least, not about powers, since we're both trying to hide them. I'll make sure you get to your car without falling flat on your face, and all you have to do is convince Brick not to cream me for the rest of the week. Do we have a deal?"
"How can I be sure you won't blab to Kim?" Bonnie demanded.
"Because if you found out, you'd be upset. And if you were upset, you might do something that I'd never be able to live with. I'd have ruined two lives because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. That's how you know I won't tell KP."
Bonnie was surprised to see that he actually looked sad. Then she glared at him. "Kim told you!"
Ron shrugged. "Well, she had to. Just her saying 'be nicer to Bonnie' seemed really weird, for her."
"Nice? NICE? She's being nice to me? That's why she won't snap back at me anymore?" Bonnie asked in disbelief.
"What did you expect?" Ron answered, frowning. "Bonnie, you and Kim don't get along, but that doesn't mean she wants you dead. And definitely not like that. You really worried her when you talked like that." He added in a softer tone, "You worried me, too."
"And you think being nice is going to fix everything?"
"No. But I figure since you seem to like snapping at us, there's no better way than to be nice and really piss you off. I'd rather get a rise out of you than not have you around anymore. I'd miss you, believe it or not."
Bonnie stared at him for a long moment, and then whipped her head away. That was NOT moisture gathering in the corners of her eyes, it just couldn't be.
"So. We got a deal?" Ron asked quietly.
Bonnie sniffed and raised her head. "Let's just go already." She started forward, but suddenly found herself cradled in Ron's arms again. "Stoppable, put me down!"
"Can't let you fall and sprain something," Ron pointed out as he started walking. "KP wouldn't wanna beat you that way. Besides, we're cheer squad elite. Gotta stick together and all that."
Bonnie glared at him, unable to think of a proper comeback in the face of all this…niceness.
Ron just shook his head. "I'll never understand why the prettiest girls are determined to look so mean."
Red flooded Bonnie's face, and she looked down. He did have a point. The meanness wasn't getting a rise out of him today, and he was obviously stuck in nice mode no matter what she did. Maybe it was time to just sit back and milk this being virtually helpless thing for as long as she could.
If either of them noticed when her head came to rest against his shoulder, neither one did anything about it.
Tara hopped out of the car, then turned and waved as her mother drove off. She was just about to head into the school when she spotted something…odd.
Bonnie Rockwaller and Ron Stoppable were thumb wrestling in Bonnie's cherry red convertible.
She took in this sight for several moments, watching Ron pin Bonnie's thumb at least twice before approaching them. "Um…guys?"
Bonnie looked up at once, seeming slightly embarrassed, but Ron pinned her a third time before hitting Tara with one of his lopsided grins.
"Bon-Bon's sick," Ron said, earning a shove for his efforts. "Hey, you are! The nurse said!"
"Sick?" Tara asked, instantly worried. "Sick how?"
"Exhausted sick," Ron replied at once, perhaps sensing what she was worried about. "She fainted in the hall. Twice."
"The second time was YOUR fault!" Bonnie insisted hotly.
"If she's exhausted, why are you two thumb wrestling?" Tara asked.
"Passing the time," Ron explained. "And trying to build her strength back up. Slowly."
"Plus Ratty Ron here can't drive me home, and I'm too tired to do it myself," Bonnie muttered.
Tara blinked. "What about Brick? Couldn't he do it?"
Ron chuckled nervously. "He's kinda unconscious. More so than usual, I mean."
Tara couldn't help it, she giggled. She'd forgotten how funny Ron could be sometimes. That, and it was always funny to watch Bonnie try to defend Brick, since she'd used most of the insults about him herself.
So it was a little odd when Bonnie didn't say anything at all.
"Anyway," Ron said after a moment. "We figured, hey, since you already missed half the day, you might as well drive Bonnie home and miss it all. The Ronster will, of course, collect any and all assignments you missed and deliver them promptly."
"That means he wants your phone number," Bonnie translated, causing Ron to go bright red.
"Sure," Tara said, surprising all three of them. "Got a pen?"
Kim was in the middle of a naco when she raised her head, frowning thoughtfully. "Hey, Monique?"
"Yeah, Kim?" Monique asked.
"Do you hear…music?"
Monique blinked. "I think so. It almost sounds like…a heavenly chorus?"
The doors to Bueno Nacho flew open, and the loud music that followed Ron in almost shook the walls themselves. He strode majestically (and in slow motion, no less) over to the table where his female friends were sitting.
"Ladies," he said pleasantly, with a polite incline of his head.
Kim and Monique looked at Ron, and then at each other.
"Bad guacamole?" Kim guessed.
"Bad guacamole," Monique agreed.
Ron shook his head. "Ladies, there is a simple explanation to your queries."
"And that would be?" Kim asked.
Ron thrust his right hand under their noses and cried, "THE RON-MAN GOT THE DIGITS, BAY-BEE!"
Kim and Monique looked down, and sure enough, there was a phone number written in permanent black marker on his palm, accompanied by a smiley face and a surprisingly legible 'Tara'.
"You got Tara's number?" Kim asked in surprise.
"How?" Monique demanded.
"Being nice to Bon-Bon," Ron replied smugly, winking at Kim.
"And how did you manage that?"
"Beat her three falls out of five."
"…what?" Kim and Monique asked in confusion.
Ron grinned, plopped down next to Kim, and stole the rest of her naco as he began to tell his tale.
"I thought you weren't crushing on Ron anymore," Bonnie said after Tara had been driving for about ten minutes.
Tara turned red, but glanced at Bonnie. "I thought you were still calling him 'Stoppable' as of this morning."
It was Bonnie's turn to blush. "So I changed my mind."
"Guess I did, too," Tara replied. "So, what'd I miss? Anything interesting happen at school? The part of it you were there for, I mean?"
"I'm dumping Brick. He was trying to pound Ron and nearly hit me."
"I TOLD you he was a meathead."
"Of course he is. But he was remotely useful up until then."
Tara rolled her eyes. "Anyway. Now do you see how sweet Ron is? He didn't have to keep you company all day."
"He's still weird," Bonnie pointed out.
"I know, but that's what makes him Ron. And he's fun weird, at least."
Bonnie made a noncommittal noise.
"Well, you have to like something about him. You practically spent the whole day with him. You let him sit in your car. You thumb wrestled with him. And you let him get away with calling you Bon-Bon. You don't even let ME call you Bon-Bon."
:"And don't you get any ideas about doing it now, either," Bonnie added at once.
"What, so now only Ron can call you that?" Tara sighed loudly. "I guess I'll have to stick with Bionic Bonnie then…"
"You are SO not funny, Tara."
Tara grinned at her. "Who said I was joking?"
"I did, that's who. You're about as funny as Ron."
"So now you've got Ron on the brain? Is that why you asked if I was still crushing on him? Because you want your turn, Bon-Bon?" Tara asked, making kissy noises.
Bonnie looked away, her face red again. "Shut up."
Tara smiled and did so, but she had a feeling it wouldn't be the last time they discussed Ron Stoppable in a positive light.
The End.
Look for the next story in this arc, The Primal Primate. Coming soon!
