BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I've made you all wait for so long in an attempt to make you suffer, but no more! (clears throat) That is, to really say, I apologize for the long wait. I've been contemplating more and more the next lover-loved idea I should explore, whether it should be /blank/ to /blank, (bleep) to (bleep), or insert name here to insert other name here , and I decided that it should be a fun one. Shino to Kurenai, folks! Be prepared, though. I wrote a lot, and this chapter is a little long. Like, independent one-shot fic long. All the same, sit back, relax (even laugh if you so see fit), and get ready for the chapter, titled:
It's Always the Quiet Ones…
I'm annoyed. Yes… there's no other way to describe this feeling. That noisy, tiresome Kiba has done it again. We were standing outside of a public women's restroom in Konoha, suspiciously close to the restroom's entrance. I was quite frankly tired of all the dirty looks of the women who passed by, getting the wrong idea. Of all the stupid things to be doing on my day off. And such a nice, summer day it is, too.
"So," I said stoically, not looking at the aforementioned menace to my nerves as two Kunoichi increased their pace upon seeing me, "why exactly are we standing here again?"
He looked indignant. The audacity of such a reaction…
"I already told you, dammit! We're keeping an eye out for Peeping Toms. Hinata's changing and I don't want closet pervert types like you spying on her. Isn't that right, Akamaru?"
The dog barked concurringly, complementing the idiot's overly enthusiastic protection of his crush, who had already said that she was perfectly fine without all the attention. While I do admit that Hinata was probably only being herself—meaning that she was more concerned with people going out of their way for her than with the notion that there might be a "Peeping Tom," which there shouldn't be unless Dog Boy ever becomes bold—I do feel a need to keep an eye on her. She's such a nice, quiet, shy girl, like a pleasant younger sibling. Why can't Kiba be more like her? In any case, all of these thoughts were overshadowed by the fact that I couldn't get two words out of my mind.
"C-closet pervert?" I sputtered. It takes something extreme for me to find difficulty speaking during the rare times that I choose to do so. And if there were ever anyone or anything that was unnecessarily extreme, it was Kiba. Damn him; it took me three years to form my cool composure—all that hard work undone in five seconds.
"Don't act so surprised, lech. It's always the quiet types who do stuff like that. Don't try to deny it."
I didn't, because there was nothing to deny.
"You're… exasperating," I said. "Isn't that right, Akamaru?"
Akamaru gave as enthusiastic a bark as he had done seconds ago, throwing off and annoying Kiba simultaneously. Funny how I always disliked Dog Boy and liked the dog. Really, there's some irony there.
"Just whose side are you on, anyway?" my most unruly teammate angrily snapped. Akamaru whimpered, looking confused in regard to whose side he should take. I was glad it wasn't just I who thought Kiba went a little over the edge at times. Kiba faced me again. "And who told you that you could talk to him anyway?"
We always argue. It's so tedious, an unnecessary exertion of both our energy and an even greater waste of my time. This can't go on much longer, for my sake. The Destruction Bugs within me stirred restlessly, sensing my discontent concerning the situation. That's normally not a problem, but when they move around as much as they're presently doing, I get ticklish, something that most people in my clan don't have to worry about. I hate this. Why me?
"I'm leaving," I said, and turned down the road back to our team's meeting grounds.
"Just where in the hell do you think you're going?" he demanded. I looked over my shoulder, studying him for a few seconds. He was snarling, teeth bared, hands clenching into and out of fists. I didn't so much as blink.
"Somewhere away from you, if that's okay with the Great Kiba."
I turned away from him once more and continued walking down the road, paying no attention to the various houses and little shops on either side of me.
"Why, you…!" he growled, trying to pursue, but his animal instinct stopped him short. He looked down at the ground in horror. A relatively thin line of Destruction Bugs were clamoring noisily; that's what he saw, at least. To me, they were simply stopping him in his tracks and awaiting further instruction. For an idiot, he's pretty smart… when he needs to be, that is.
"Aren't you forgetting something?" I asked. "If you're busy picking a fight with me, who will keep the perverts away? Besides, you already know quite well… we love Chakra." By we, I clearly meant my precious and numerous companions.
Kiba spat at the ground then returned to his pointless post. I continued about my merry way, in a manner of speaking.
As I left the business district of Konoha, I saw the Nara prodigy coming my way, looking rather flustered about something. He didn't seem annoyed, so I called out to him.
"Hey," I said as we came close. No point in an elaborate greeting. He said the same, waving his hand.
"What are you doing walking around on your own?" he asked, though it seemed like he could really care less. Despite his carefree, complaining nature, I like him. He's a cool guy. He's quiet. Now that I think about it, it seems that anyone who is quiet is immediately okay with me. I also respect him for his abilities as a strategist. If only he were on my team instead of that other guy….
"Nothing much," I replied. "Just heading over to where my team usually meets. I have nothing else to do. What about you? You seem bothered by something."
"It's nothing really. Just… some stuff that happened. I'll get over it in a bit."
"Anything to do with that Suna-nin girl? I heard she'd been bothering you quite a bit."
I suppose I must have said the wrong thing—or maybe it was the right thing?—because his face went redder than usual. Well, he's a boy, she's girl, I guess. Besides, it's not that hard to believe. I see these types of things, being the quiet guy I am.
"Oh," was all I said. He blushed even deeper, if that was possible.
"It's not like that at all!" he exclaimed in a rather loud voice that could only draw attention to the 'it' in question. I cocked an intrigued eyebrow.
"What's 'it' not like?" I inquired.
He crossed his arms and made a slight grunt of irritation.
"I didn't realize you had a sense of humor," he muttered, his face gradually returning to its original color.
"You know what?" I replied nonchalantly. "I didn't realize I had one either."
He smirked.
"In any case, it's not important," he finally said. It's not like I was bothered too much by the lack of details, but I did find myself slightly disappointed. I'm not one for gossip, but the Sand girl is certainly blessed with more than just talent as a ninja, in my opinion. He's a lucky guy. Girls look at me and my bugs and freak out. I'll never forget the day I met his bossy teammate for the first time.
"Well, take it easy," I said, and we parted ways. Walking alone is one of my favorite pastimes. That and watching the local bug life. You know… when my other teammate, whose name will not be mentioned, is not urinating all over said local bug life.
"By the way," Shikamaru called after me, "Asuma and your team leader should be talking just up ahead. They sent me to do some troublesome errands"—at that point, he sounded rather annoyed—"just thought I'd let you know. Well, later."
He disappeared down the street, and I continued on, making my way to the training grounds.
That makes me uneasy, when I know the two of them are alone in the same place. It's no secret amongst my team and Shikamaru's that Asuma and Kurenai-san sort of have a thing for each other. Well, it can't be helped. It's to be expected, seeing as how they grew up together. As for my own feelings, I am the best of secret keepers. Either that, or Kiba's too dumb and jealous to notice that the world does not revolve around Hinata or himself.
I'm not very surprised about the way I feel. But I'm not exactly about to go blabbing about it. Kurenai-san is great. To others, she comes off as very stern, reserved, and intimidating, but we see her true self all the time. She's playful, witty, caring, and she loves bugs. I mean, she loves them. Possibly even more than I do. In fact, she envies me for being an Abarame clan member. But, what tops it all off is that she is insanely beautiful, if it is possible for beauty and insanity to possess any correlation whatsoever.
I'm usually more rational than this. She's twice my age, and probably sees me as just a student. I should know better than to set my heart on something I can't have, but that damned adolescent in me just won't die. She doesn't help the situation, either.
Kiba constantly mocks my bugs. He himself doesn't get to me, but I am sensitive about such things, since I have such an appreciation for the little ones who dwell inside me. Kurenai-san tends to scold Kiba, and, as though she senses my own insecurities, makes me feel like I'm the luckiest man in the world, to be given such a ninja ability. She thinks I'm cool, and, I blushed for the first time in my life when she said I was cute. I remember back then, about a year ago on my past birthday. Kiba was enraged that Kurenai-san had once again stuck up for me, and Hinata giggled. And then, Kurenai-san kissed me on the forehead; at that time, Kiba was quiet—probably unable to utter a single sound in disbelief—and Hinata was shocked to constant gasps and being her typical red-in-the-face self. Then, Kurenai-san, seeing that I, myself was as silent and shocked as the others, kissed me lightly on the lips. She said it was for good luck with the ladies. I think that's why Kiba seems more irritating than before. I know I'll never forget that kiss, but I'm sure he probably remembers it better than I do.
She's definitely a flirt when she's comfortable. I doubt she thought much of what she did on that day, but I know I did, and that, quite frankly, is the problem. I don't know what to say when I'm around her, especially when it's just me and her, which happens quite often. She likes spending time with me; we have a lot in common. Of course, she spends about as much time with Kiba and Hinata, but she has a knack for making us each individually feel special. When we're out just walking, buying supplies, carrying home her groceries, bug hunting, or whatever, I feel like I want to say something, but I don't know what it is. I'm glad I'm known for being quiet, so it just seems like I'm being my anti-social self. Of course, I'm also grateful for her not expecting too much from me. She said to me once, unprompted, that I shouldn't ever try to change.
Kurenai-san confides in me often. She feels like she can tell me anything, without fear of judgment. I know what her worst fear is (closed spaces), her favorite food (sweet bean paste; Anko-san had turned her onto it), and that she has no siblings, something we both have in common. I also hold out hope because she has never said that I'm like a little brother to her, nor has she ever said anything about Asuma except that she'd like to whip his butt in a spar someday (he keeps dodging the challenge, apparently). She told me that she has a special place in her heart for people like me and my teammates, because we're, in our own ways, fragments of her younger self. She, too, was alone, and had to find some way to cope. Because of that, she feels particularly close to all of us, especially me. The only thing she has ever said that made me feel slightly uneasy is that Asuma was her first friend.
The sky above me is exceptionally cool and blue. I heard several birds chirping and, with my advanced hearing, a great deal of distant bugs. As I reached the outskirts of the village, I came to the field in which Shikamaru is well-known for cloud-watching. By the trees at the edge of the forest is our meeting place, and I could already see my sensei and her long-time friend talking animatedly. For some reason, Kurenai-san's smile never graces her lips when she speaks with him, even though they're so close. Perhaps it is reserved for us. Several stray butterflies flutter idly around me in the field. On that note, Shikamaru's best friend isn't half-bad either. He loves butterflies, because he was named for them, but he says he would probably love them just as much even if he hadn't been named Chouji.
"Kurenai-san, Asuma-san, good afternoon," I called loudly, still somewhat distant from them. That's somewhat uncharacteristic for me, but I just wanted to end that conversation as soon as possible. She turned and gave me one of her rare smiles. Asuma, being his jolly self, smiled anyway. My great rival, as I often joked to myself.
"Shino, what brings you here?" she asked. Asuma pulled out a cigarette, lit it with a Katon-style jutsu, and puffed on it. Kurenai-san frowned and turned to her colleague.
"Honestly, when are you going to drop that disgusting habit?" she said, speaking in a tone eerily like that of my mother's. "How are you going to give me a challenge when we finally get to that match I want if you get lung cancer?"
Asuma ignored her, which made her frown more. He inhaled, and puffed in the opposite direction. Apparently, his smoking was even less up for discussion than was her desire to fight him. She sighed and returned her attention to me. Now, if only Beard-san would go somewhere else.
"I just wanted to get away from Kiba. That's really all it was." I shrugged, and she chuckled. Oh, the effects of a feminine laugh on a hormonally tormented boy.
"Is he bothering you again?" she asked, concern steadily revealing itself in her voice and expression. I shrugged again; she tells me often that I look cool doing that. Do I do so because of what she says? I have no idea.
"Not really. He's in 'Operation: Gung-Ho—Protect Hinata Even Though She Doesn't Currently Need Protection' mode again. I left because it, along with he and the many things he does, happens to be pointless."
She blinked.
"I don't think I've ever heard you say so many words at once. In any case, how about spending some time with me?" Kurenai-san said, winking. My heart leapt at the offer, and I felt like I just might blush again.
"Oh, so you're just going to up and leave me here?" said Asuma, looking slightly perturbed, though he was probably just kidding.
"Oh, I'm so sorry," replied Kurenai-san. "I thought you couldn't hear me over there, or maybe that cigarette was better company or something."
"You'll never leave the cigarettes alone, will you?" said Asuma. "Well, it's about time I went and gathered the good-for-nothings together anyway. If you see Shikamaru, let him know to meet us at 'that place.'"
"Oh, you mean the Bar-B-Q restaurant."
"Shut up, woman…" Asuma murmured jokingly through gritted teeth. He walked off, waving his hand dismissively behind him.
"And don't forget about that fight you owe me!" Kurenai-san called after him. He didn't respond, and from the look on her face, she didn't expect him to. She smiled a half-smile, showing some exasperation on her part. Then, she looked at me. "Well, shall we then?"
"Certainly, Miss." With that, we made our way back into the village, walking side by side. My day off feeling rather consummate at this point (not in the sense of marriage; you know what I mean), we spent the remainder of the day together. Kurenai-san bought us some sweets and drinks (I just keep expecting her to say 'little brother') and we spent the day eating them, then going around and visiting with her friends and family. It was that summer night that I would never forget.
As the sun began to set, Kurenai-san suggested that we lie in the field amongst the fireflies and look at the stars. How could I say no? Of course, in my eagerness, I felt that I was giving myself away, and in an unprecedented act of saving one's ass, I suggested to take Kiba and Hinata along with us, preparing a meal and tea for a nice picnic. I felt disappointed when Kurenai-san happily accepted my offer, even though that meant that she wouldn't get the wrong idea, which was, in fact, the right idea.
Much to my delight, when we did suggest things to the two of them, they told us they already had plans.
"Kiba-kun said he'd treat me to some ramen at Ichiraku," Hinata said happily. She probably expected during her venture in ramen bliss to see a certain loud-mouthed blonde who beat a certain loud-mouthed fleabag some time ago. Well, at least Kiba's finally making his move, so I can't knock him for that. I suspect Hinata knows about my feelings. It almost looked as though she were winking at me out of the corner of her eye. How embarrassing for me, if that were the case.
"Aww," said Kurenai-san. "It looks like we won't be able to employ your wonderful cooking talents this time."
"Nope!" replied Kiba. "Tonight, I've got Hinata all to myself."
"And you behave yourself," Kurenai-san immediately said with a stern finality. "I expect you to be a gentleman in the presence of such a fine lady."
"Yes, ma'am!" he barked. He was slightly blushing, and characteristically rubbing his nose with that finger. Someone needs to make him stop that.
"I might not be able to prepare anything to eat, Kurenai-sensei," said Hinata, "but I can at least make some tea for you two."
"Would you? I'd be very grateful," said Kurenai-san.
"Thank you, Hinata," I said.
"Not at all! I want you guys to enjoy yourselves, too. You're all like family to me."
I couldn't help suppressing a smile at her words, particularly when I noticed that Dog Boy's head had dropped in defeat. I suppose he didn't want to be seen as family in that way.
"Um… are you alright, Kiba-kun?" Hinata asked, oblivious to what she had done. Oh, the sheer satisfaction of it all.
Hinata's surprisingly fast in the kitchen. When she had finished with the tea, she gave us some cups and put the tea in two Thermos containers, one prepared to my tastes (how did she know? Perhaps I should join Kiba and pursue her when I finally wake up from my current dream), the other to Kurenai-san's, and we bid each other farewell as we went our own separate ways.
The trip back to the fields was rather uneventful. The fireflies lit the entire village, as they were inclined to do during the summer. It gave everything around us a warm, mystical feel. On a random note, why Kiba, Hinata or I never feel overheated in these coats is beyond me.
"Well, we're here," said Kurenai-san as we reached the edge of the village. We went deep into the fields; this was not the first time we'd done so. There was a particularly pleasant area for picnicking that my team tended to use every time we settled here. Surely, it would be useful for a night of idle star-watching.
The village itself looked glorious from far off in the pale firefly light; the fields were transformed into an entirely new world. The tall grass shimmered gold, making the entire field look as though it were alive and fiery. It was a rare beauty and serenity—a Kurenai, if you will. Lame as that was, it's true, I say. Just feel safe knowing I'll never say that to her face. I know I will.
We settled down in our designated patch and each poured ourselves some tea in the cups we'd been given. As expected, Hinata's tea is divine. I'm feeling warm and tingly as I drink it. Kurenai and I sat uncomfortably close (for me) as we looked up at the sky. I poured myself another cup and drank it down quickly. I could feel my face burning, sharing the nighttime scenery with her. I felt as though I would burn myself out, every ounce of heat escaping my body. My mind was also becoming hazy; all I could see was her, and the stars ceased to matter.
Wait a minute… that's not good. I was starting to feel a little dizzy, and I fell on my back to regain my sense of equilibrium, but the world took a little while to get used to; it had to be an ass with all the spinning. I'm drunk, I know it. But who—how? Then it came to me. Kiba, the eternal prankster strikes again. Suddenly, a strong fear gripped me as I finally adjusted to this awkward feeling; I was going to do something stupid.
I devoted every ounce of my will to not saying or doing anything I would regret later, and as we sat in silence for the next five or so minutes, it looked as though my resolve had managed to get the upper hand, but…
"The stars out tonight are beautiful," said Kurenai-san. "They're so far away."
That's all it took.
"And so are you," I said. Why? Why'd she have to speak? "Beautiful and out of my reach."
"I beg your pardon?" she asked. She didn't seem horrified by what I said, but such a spontaneous statement would surprise anyone. I wanted to say I was joking, but apparently, in drunk-speak, it came out like:
"I think I love you."
"Well, I didn't expect to hear you say that."
"I also think I'm drunk." I just could not shut up. I suddenly hated myself. But most of all, I hated that damned Kiba. He had no idea what he'd just done. My world was crumbling before me. Kurenai-san would most certainly think differently of me by the end of tonight. And I was getting drunker by the minute, at that. Sake is potent, I've never had any, and I would probably find in about seven or eight years that I couldn't hold my liquor anyway.
"Oh…" she said airily. "That explains it. Looks like Kiba thought about pouring some sake into your tea."
It wasn't like me being drunk would make her think I didn't mean what I said, so I decided to go for broke. That was definitely the lack of inhibition speaking. Why is "lack of inhibition" equivalent to "lack of desire to quit while one is behind"? I think she found this amusing herself.
"And how long," she continued, "have you felt this way about me?"
"I started realizing I had feelings for you about three months after the formation of our team." My voice sounded slightly slurred. She was out of focus, too, but I could tell she was smiling. Please, body of mine, stop making a fool out of me. "There are many things I like about you, but I won't bore you with the details. I know it's a temporary crush."
She stood up and put her hands on her hips in mock indignation. This was torture. At the same time, I'm glad she didn't get eerily silent.
"So I'm just something you'll get over, am I?" she said. Maybe she'd be more believable if she could ever keep a straight face. I know I was smiling. A lot. More so than Aburame Shino has smiled in his life. I also knew I would feel like crying after this. A whole lot. More so than Aburame Shino has ever cried or ever will cry in his life.
"I'm sorry for speaking of it in the first place," I said.
"Why's that? You can't help how you feel." Kurenai-san's tone had become serious, something I was also accustomed to. For that, I was grateful. "And it's not like I'll tell anyone about this, so you shouldn't feel ashamed."
"Kurenai-san…"
"Come on. There's no point in staying here. It's pretty clear you wouldn't feel comfortable, so let's get you home and call it a night."
She helped me to my feet, and I placed my arm around her shoulders for support. She was truly an angel, and I was most certainly appreciative of her understanding. I could barely raise my head to see in front of me. When I would next be sober, I was sure that I would be even less talkative than usual for a good long while. Then, as we started walking toward the village…
"You shouldn't feel bad," said Kurenai-san. "I've done a lot of things that might have made you feel some way about me. I can understand how you feel."
"Kurenai-san…" at this point, some of my resolve, along with her help, allowed me to say no more than her name. Or maybe, I was so drunk, that was the only thing I could say. Things were beginning to go black. I think I was falling asleep.
"But you know something?" she went on, the sternness of her voice fading, but not the sincerity. "It wasn't all mere flirtation. In a few years, if you still wanted me, I could see myself with you."
I could feel her breath just behind my ear as she spoke almost in a whisper. I felt as though I would pass out just from that. At this point in time, I couldn't even open my eyes. I might very well have been dreaming already; maybe I was just imagining things.
"You really are ahead of your time," I continued to perceive her saying. That was the last thing I heard.
The next morning, I woke up with a headache and a dire desire to vomit. This must be the hangover. I would definitely not be drinking in seven or eight years, not if this would be the end result.
I was in my dragonfly pajamas. How embarrassing. Who had undressed me? It seemed illogical to say Kurenai-san, for which I felt some relief, but I realized that there was no way my parents could not tell I had been drinking. Even though Kurenai-san had probably already explained the necessary details of the situation, it still felt awkward nonetheless.
When I had finally pulled myself together, I washed, dressed, brushed my teeth, and left stealthily from my house without breakfast. Mom would scold me, but I just didn't want to see anyone just yet.
As I walked down the sunlit streets of Konoha early in the morning, I heard familiar whistling. It was Kiba.
He came around the corner with his hands in his pockets, whistling one of his characteristic tunes with Akamaru howling cheerily atop his head. They stopped when they saw me. He smiled. I knew it.
"Morning," I said.
"Morning," he said back. "Looks like you got a little tipsy last night."
"Yeah. Funny how that is. You wouldn't happen to know anything else about it, would you? Like how the sake got in my tea?"
"Well, it's not like I put it there," said Kiba with sarcasm that intentionally said otherwise. "So, say anything interesting to Kurenai?"
My eyes widened. A disturbing thought dawned upon me. I cocked an eyebrow.
"You knew," was all I said. "All along."
"Yep."
"Well, you're certainly smarter than you look," I said.
"Hah! Well, you're certainly more human than you act!"
"Hmph. Well, shall we go pick up your beloved Hinata-hime?" I said stoically, but the humor was still there.
"What exactly are you saying?" said Kiba defensively. "It's not like that at all!"
"I heard Naruto's planning to ask her out."
"What?"
"Just kidding."
"Bastard. You knew I'd think it was true if you said it. I didn't think you were capable of lying, gossip, and trickery."
"I'm a ninja, sir, and a better one than you at that."
"Wanna prove it?"
"Anytime."
With that, we continued down the street in the direction Kiba had been going toward the Hyuuga residence. I would most definitely kick his ass eventually, but I was sort of glad I'd experienced what I did last night. I'm sure it wasn't a dream, and I had also picked up some newfound respect for Dog Boy. Not a lot, but… some. Now, if only he'd be a bit more quiet. And stop making fun of bugs. And smelling of dog.
