Chapter Ten
This chapter dedicated to my loyalists-tardychick, heather dawn, lysser8312, bibleboymary4ever, ali-chan1, and Princessbm. You've all reviewed more than once and I love you for it. Sorry if I forgot someone's name!
"I can't believe you're not mad," I said. We were on my bed. I was sitting between his legs, and Jenny was in my lap.
"If I was mad I'd be an asshole," he said.
"So you don't mind waiting?" I clarified.
"Not exactly. I thought I was lucky to have a beautiful, talented, sexy, brilliant girl friend, but I don't know how you got to be my wife," he said. I laughed. Jenny laughed as well.
"I don't deserve you," I said.
"You kidding? A year ago you were a cheerleader dating Nathan and Lucas Scott, the two best players. I was one of those small, insignificant players that people never focus on. And even if I was able and desiring to go the parties you got invited to, I wasn't invited. Everyone admired you, you were the only girl on the squad that cared about anything besides their appearance. I just got lucky, not you," he said.
Right then would have been the perfect time. Jenny was dozing off-I could have dumped her in her crib, taken him across the hall and consummate my heart out.
"One thing though?" he said, as I began to relax, my eyelids fluttering.
"What?" I asked sleepily.
"Just let me in sometimes?" he asked. I twisted around to look at him. Had he actually just said that? Was he deaf. He noticed my expression and his eyes widened.
"No! Not like that! In here, Pey," he said, placing his hand over my heart. I remembered Luke saying the same thing-before he'd turned to Brooke and then to Nikki. But Jake was different. I hoped.
I was careful to look away from him as I went to the bathroom to change. When I got back, he'd already stripped down to his boxers. He wasn't quite as built as Nathan had been, but I had a hard time looking at his stomach muscles and not staring. Jake, thankfully, didn't return the favour-he wasn't the kind of guy who spent his entire time leering, though his admiring glances made me feel beautiful when they did come.
I leaned against the door as he moved across the room to shut off a lamp. He also bent down and began to quickly organize the papers on my desk-he was always doing things like that. I giggled.
"Hey, Nathan and Haley got back together," I said.
"I kind of figured-neither of them were in school today," he said. "How did it happen?"
"Well remember how they kissed after she sang? Then they went outside and she told him that she didn't want to be a star anymore and then they went home and talked some more and then they… you know," I said, blushing.
"Had a bit of a reunion special?" he asked. I nodded and looked at my bare feet.
"Oh, Brooke was concerned about you today-have you talked to her lately?" he asked.
"No-but she sent Haley over in her stead, so it's okay. Um, can I ask you something?"
"Another thing, you mean? Sure," he said easily, picking up one of his shirts and tossing it into the drawer.
"What are we going to do next year?"
"Well you'll go to Duke, I won't, I'll take care of Jenny and you'll come home in the evenings and I'll try to work my way through when I can," he said.
"Do you think you can handle her all the time? Do you think we can handle having such different lives?" I asked.
"Yes," he said. "Can I ask you something?"
"You mean another thing?" I said saucily.
"Can we talk about our histories?" he asked. I nodded slowly and went to sit beside him on the bed.
"Well there was Nathan. And then there was you," I said. He laughed.
"Elaborate? Please?"
"Fine. I got my first kiss in grade eight by Greg Carter, then I dated um Stephen Wells and then Nathan, and I lost my virginity to Nathan and then Lucas I came close but never did and then Anna kissed me and then you did," I said. I didn't have a very long history.
"Anna?" he asked.
"Please don't go there," I requested. He shrugged.
"Okay. Don't worry, it's not actually that bad. So in grade nine I lost it to Daria Hoffman, then there was Theresa, then Alanna Kortright, who you don't know," he said.
"And then Nikki?" I asked.
"Yes," he said.
"Huh. You slept with Theresa?" I asked. He nodded.
"Also too good for me," he said. I leaned against him-he smelt like soap. My husband, I reminded myself.
"Well, no bloodshed there," I said.
"What?"
"Oh… you know how Nathan was more active than Haley before they were married?" I asked. He groaned.
"Please stop talking about Nathan and sex. I keep picturing you," he said.
"Well it turns out that he-who-must-not-be-named lost his virginity to Haley's sister when he saw a freshman and her sister was a senior," I said.
"Wow. Who knew little towns were so dramatic?" he asked, flopping backwards onto the bed.
"It's time to go to sleep," I said decidedly, climbing into my side of the bed.
"Just a second-I have to go turn off my phone," he said. He moved across the room again and turned off his cell. He was about to turn back, but picked one last piece of paper off the ground. He studied it, and turned around to face me. He affixed me with a hurt puppy dog look. I squinted at the paper-it was my most recent sketch.
"Jake that doesn't mean anything," I said, leaping from the bed and snatching it from him.
"No, I think it does. These are you how you say what you mean-of course it means something. I didn't mean forever? What did you mean, Peyton? That's you. And me. Is that Nikki?" he asked.
"I'm just scared to trust you, Jake," I said. I was beginning to tear up.
"You're wearing your ring in this. So what do you mean? That this isn't forever? This would have made a lot more sense if you'd drawn it a week ago. But you drew it last night. Our wedding night, Peyton!" he said. Why did I have to date my drawings?
"I'm trying to work on it!" I cried.
"Do you really trust me so little? Do really mean that little to you? You don't have to love me, it would be incredible if we could figure out how to be husband and wife within two days but can't you trust me? I've always tried so hard to keep from hurting you," he said.
"And you've never hurt me. But I thought Lucas would never hurt me and then I let him in and he broke my heart," I explained.
"Luke isn't a guide for all of us. What is it with you and him, anyway?" he asked.
"Nothing. We've just always connected," I said.
"Connected?"
"Yeah, like you and me," I said, taking a step closer. I ran a finger down his cheek.
"Don't."
"Are you mad at me?" I asked.
"I'm confused. I love you," he said.
"Stop saying that," I said angrily, stalking out of the room and down the stairs.
"Stop running away! Where are you going?" he asked, staring at me in my pajamas and flip-flops, my car keys in hand.
"Out. I've got my cell I'll be back in time for curfew," I said bitingly, running out the door.
I turned my car towards downtown, the only place nearby where everyone wouldn't be asleep. People were loitering on street corners. As my car passed through the bad parts of town, hookers hung out, waving.
Suddenly I hit the brakes. On the corner I saw a familiar face-long dark hair, silver hoop earring, eyes encircled in eyeliner. I parked and climbed out.
"Nikki?" I asked. The energy had long since been drained out of my voice. She turned on me.
"Hey, it's the babysitter! Isn't it time for bed?" she asked, indicating my flannel pants.
"I guess you've got a few more hours until you're finished your shift though," I said. She glared and pushed me backwards.
"I'm not going to fight you Nikki," I said.
"Then what are you doing here? My baby kick you out?" she asked.
"Gathering evidence," I guess. She rolled her eyes.
"Right. Like they're really going to listen to the girlfriend. Go home to my leavings."
"You're right for once, Nikki. Most likely they wouldn't listen to his girlfriend. However, I have a hunch that they'd listen to his wife," I said, holding up my left hand.
"Liar," she said, her voice dripping with menace. In a flash she'd reached into her clutch and pulled out a switch knife. She flicked it open expertly. "Ready to tell the truth?"
Author's note-Y'all ready for this?
