The Secrets We Keep

Author: LVB

Summary: Back briefly in Coruscant during the Clone Wars, Anakin notices his wife is acting strangely. What is Padmè hiding?

Disclaimer: Star Wars belongs to GL and LucasFilm Ltd. All rights reserved.

A/N: So here it is guys. The final chapter where everything is revealed. Originally this was two chapters but I know how much you guys wanted longer chapters and more resolution - so here it is! I'd like to thank ALL the reviewers who've stuck by me through this story. I love each and every one of you!

In the interim between this and my next couple of fics, I'll be returning to my angst. I love my angst. This is dedicated to all the readers who have procrastinated doing homework because of this story. You know who you are ;) Oh, and a huge shoutout to my beta Lacey (Toni - check out her stuff, she's in my fave authors!). It wouldn't have turned out like this if it wasn't for you!


Ch 11: Stop!

Padmè sat in the waiting area. The feeling of déjà vu came back to her as she remembered doing the same thing only a few days ago. But this time, it was much worse. She felt like a murderer waiting to be put on trial. She wasn't here for a check-up; she was here to kill her unborn child.

It's not a child yet, she tried to convince herself.

That didn't make her feel better at all. But she couldn't allow herself to show any weakness – she had decided on this course of action. It was the only way things could work. Maybe someday in the future, they could have a child. But not now.

Now was bad.

She began to touch her still flat stomach. It was amazing knowing that something was alive in there. Something both she and Anakin had created. She was already beginning to feel maternal instincts. Many times she had caught herself touching her stomach.

She was doing it now. As if her hand had been burnt, she jerked it away. She couldn't allow herself to get attached now. She was here for a reason. She was here for the best interests of Anakin, herself and even the child.

What kind of life could they offer their baby?

He or she wouldn't be allowed to ever stay with their parents. Their father a Jedi; their mother a politician.

She couldn't have the baby all alone – what a scandal indeed!

This was the only option. It had to be.

She was nervous. Extremely nervous. She wished at least Dorme could have been here. But then again, Dorme couldn't have known why she was here.

She badly wished Anakin could be here with her. She wanted them to do this together, to grieve together. She had such a hard time keeping this terrible secret from him. She was grieving for her loss already, and her poor husband had no idea.

But that's the way it should be.

The nursing droid's call to a Miss Naberrie promptly snapped her out of her thoughts.

It was time.

She took a deep breath and followed the droid into the room. It was white and sterile; very fitting for the function it performed. The droid told her the doctor would be with her in a moment. He was just preparing the medical instruments for the procedure. He gave her a standard hospital gown to change into. She changed and lay back on the bed.

Instruments. Procedure. It all sounded so formal. What she heard was the doctor preparing his weapons to destroy her child.

This is the way it has to be.

Suddenly, she heard a commotion going on outside. The hair on the back of her neck stood up. She knew that familiar presence.

The door burst open.

"Anakin!"

He had found the place with ease. Although it was hidden and secure, he was able to follow his Force connection to his wife. Using his favourite Jedi trick, he was able to convince the people in the front to let him in.

And now that he was here, he could see it for himself. There she was, sitting upright on the white bed, clothed in one of those ridiculous hospital gowns. It was true then. She had come here for the procedure.

She had a bewildered look on her face. It was tainted with guilt and despair. He could see the grief plainly in her eyes.

"Anakin…" she said again. Suddenly, he was angry with her. She had gone behind his back. She had lied to him! She was simply not going to tell him of this…miracle. Instead, she was just going to kill the child. Kill his baby!

"Padmè," he said, the icy tone present in his voice. He couldn't help it.

"W-what are you doing here?" Padmè asked.

Oh, no Anakin. I can't do this now. Please, just leave.

He glared at her as he slammed the files she had hidden in the refresher down onto the cold, hard table.

"This is why I'm here Padmè. The same reason you are. Except that I'm not here to watch my baby die"

He was angry.

Silence.

"I-I'm sorry Anakin. I…"

"You are here to abort your pregnancy, Padmè. You are here to kill the child you and I created together. And you weren't even going to tell me about it."

She didn't say anything. He was right.

He charged over to the bed and sat down next to her. He grabbed her shoulders tightly, which frightened her.

"You hid this from me, Padmè. I am your husband. This is my child too, dammit!"

Again, he was right.

"I thought it was best if you didn't know," she whispered in response. The flood of tears returned. The grief, the pain and the guilt all came tumbling back. "I didn't tell you, Anakin, because of this! Don't you see! I didn't want you to be here when your child was terminated. I didn't want you to have to make this decision."

"So you made it without me?" he fiercely responded.

"Yes, Anakin. I did…I'm doing what's best for both of us."

Suddenly both Padmè and Anakin realised that Anakin was also crying.

Anakin stood up, trying to hide his obvious hurt.

"Padmè, you can't do that. You can't do this! You have no right! How in the Force can you think this is the best solution – to kill our child!"

Padmè began to cry harder.

"Because it wouldn't work, Anakin! I can readily leave my politics but can you so readily leave the Jedi Order? You can keep me a secret, Anakin, but you can't keep a child hidden in the shadows!"

He stopped. That's what she thought – that he would choose the Jedi Order over his family?

He walked back over to his wife and embraced her. She sobbed harder and harder into his chest and he felt his own tears cascade over his cheeks.

"I'm sorry Ani," she moaned.

"Shhh," he comforted. He tilted her head up so their eyes looked into each other. At that moment, Padmè saw her same feelings reflected in her husband's eyes. She saw the pain; the hurt, and the grief.

"I would never, EVER keep my child hidden in the shadows, Padmè. And I would never choose the Order over my family. I know you may think I would have made you choose this path, angel. But I wouldn't have. You didn't even give me the chance."

She hiccuped and her crying softened a little.

"Padmè, I love you. You are my wife. I promised you someday we would leave this life and start new. And if we are going to do that, we can start by having a family."

"You mean…"

He smiled through the tears that were his wife's, mingled with his own.

"Padmè, I want this baby. I want our baby."

For the first time in days, Padmè smiled broadly. Through the tears, he could see her happiness. The grief and the pain began to fade away.

"Come on, angel. Let's get out of here."

Padmè nodded in agreement. She quickly changed into her concealing clothes. For now, she didn't even care that the public might see her and a Jedi walking through Coruscant. She was just too happy.

Looking at her husband, she saw how happy he was too. He was practically glowing.

Leading her out onto the busy streets of Coruscant, Anakin motioned to his speeder. She got in and allowed her husband to speed off. Now all that was left to do was to celebrate.