AN: I know this fiction has been very, very drag-gy, and I apologize for that. I should have went straight to the point, but I wanted to explain the chapters bit by bit, but it turned out very stretched, and it's.. well.

I know I should be reading my history textbook and doing my English homework, but… Um. :D

A very big thank you to Nekotsuki, Strawberry Promises, Fantasy Angel Victoria, Sagitarious Devil, Scythe195, Anonymous Miss, Erica6060, Kawaii96, Silent Tears of Agony, Triste1, Brittanie Love, Kawaii96 (again :D), Samantha Waters, Ochako107, and Pinkcarr!

Here's chapter six!


Chapter 6

"K-Kao? Are you crying?" he asked uncertainly.

Upon hearing his voice, she immediately wiped her tears with the helm of her sleeve. Borne out of pride, her spine stiffened as she sat up straighter, with her back turned to him.

"No, of course not," she said curtly, struggling to keep her voice steady but it came out sounding hoarse instead.

"Are you alright?" he tried again.

"Yes I'm fine."

Not believing her, he walked up to Kaoru and placed his hands on her shoulder, turning her around so that he could look at her face.

Her eyes were read and puffy.

"You're crying."

Kaoru sniffed and turned her face away from him. "What's wrong?" he asked worriedly, his right hand coming up to cradle her cheek.

"Nothing," she snapped, jerking her face away from his touch.

"I told you I'm alright, so leave me alone," she told him icily, ignorant to the fact that her words stung his heart and made him feel pushed aside and unwanted.

Kenshin decided that he would not be deterred despite the pain her words invoked in him. He was much too stubborn and he was determined to find out what was bothering her.

He asked again, "What's wrong?"

"Go Away!" The nine-year-old half shrieked at him as she pushed him irritably. She wanted him out before her tears came back. She hated crying, especially in front of people. She was angry at him because he was here to witness her moment of weakness.

Couldn't he tell she didn't want him to see her like this?

"What's wrong?" he repeated, voice firm. It was clear he would not leave until he got some answers.

Kaoru looked away, fighting to keep her face straight. She attempted to push his hands away from her arms but he didn't let go. All she accomplished was making him hold her tighter as he stared at her, a small frown marring his face.

Violet eyes sparkled and swirled into gold as his eyes narrowed, impatience coloring his tone. He was concerned, couldn't she see that? Why wouldn't she tell him what was wrong with her? Upon the heels of that though came twin emotions of pain and anger.

"Tell me Kaoru," he said, wanting to shake some sense into her.

Kaoru glared at him as much as her swollen red eyes would allow. Still, she said nothing.

Realizing that she would not open her mouth no matter how much he asked (or rather, demanded), he decided to try the opposite approach.

"Kaoru," he said gently. "What's wrong?"

His voice was calm, soothing and inviting, urging her silently to tell him. He was tempting her with his tone and expression, and she knew it.

In response she glared at him even harder than before.

"Nothing," she replied stubbornly.

"It's obvious something is bothering you," he said patiently, as he let his fingertips wonder her cheeks with his faint touch. He was trying to soothe her with his touch but her skin was so soft, the motion ended up soothing him as well.

"Tell me," he pleaded, a sense of worry in his voice. "I don't like seeing you like thi----"

Unable to hold them back any longer, her tears came spilling out as she buried her face on his chest.

"M-Ma… M-M-mama is...." her voice choked out, sentence uncompleted. "M-Mama is.."

He held her, stroking her hair as she cried. Her small body was shaking her could feel the wetness of his shirt as the fabric soaked in her tears. He tilted her face up so he could look at her.

Rivulets of tears were running down her cheek, her face was pale contrasting sharply with the redness of her cheeks, eyes and lips.

Kaoru felt weak and vulnerable, but she couldn't hold back the grief and sorrow anymore. Every emotion she felt, the devastation, it was all plainly mirrored in her eyes as she decided to open up to him from the inside out.

And that scared him.

It scared him to know that she was so fragile, like a delicate, porcelain doll.

Like she would crack any second, shattering into millions of pieces.

He held her close, trying to infuse her with his own strength. He wouldn't allow her to break. He wouldn't allow anything to mar her perfect innocence.

It had been in the middle of the night when he decided that he wanted a glass of milk, since his throat was feeling very dry. He was on his way to the kitchen when passed by Kaoru's room and he heard her crying softly.

"What happened?" he prompted when it seemed that Kaoru wouldn't say anything more.

She continued crying, with hiccups interupting in between. He could tell that her tears were running out as dry sobs wrenched out of her slender frame. He held her, murmuring comforting words, trying to assure her that he was here, that he was always here and he would never leave her.

That she could tell him anything, and it was all going to be okay.

"M-mama…" Kaoru began as she clutched unto him, her anchor. "She's…she's dead."


That had been the first time in his life to witness Kaoru breaking down in front of him. He had been going insane with worry the entire night, afraid that she would never stop crying.

He hated her crying.

He hated her tears, he hated everything that made her unhappy.

But she did stop crying eventually. When she had fallen asleep, she had stopped crying, much to his relief.

He sighed.

A week left till the wedding.

He should be happy. He should be the definition of happy. But instead, a part of him dreaded the wedding day as much as a part of him longed for it. For some reason, he felt that it would not be the wonderful wedding that he had always dreamed of having with Kaoru.

He hated this.

He hated this so much.

For the first time ever, he had no idea how to carry out his one last assignment. He wanted so badly to end it all, since after this he would never be bounded again. Going through a pile of frustration, his accomplice took in his silent response and made the decision for him.

He made orders that they were going to attack in two days time at nightfall. Weather Kenshin liked it, or not.

So he decided to tell her everything.

Today.

Now.

Before the night falls in two days.

'Utterly perfect timing.' He thought gloomily.

-

"Such a beautiful dress, don't you think so?" Kaoru said dreamily as she held it up against her body and twirling around with a big smile plastered on her face. "I'm so happy right now, even if you drown me in the Red sea I'd still be smiling like some mad, demented cow."

Sayo laughed in reply, "You're going mad! You're already so crazy in love, I wonder what would happen next? Anyway, I heard that you'd float in the Red sea, and you can never drown there."

Kaoru giggled, "I know. Why'd you think I chose that sea?" she grinned. "I'd never want to be apart from Kenshin. Why would I want to drown myself when I'm obviously marrying the person I'm so crazy in love with?" she said as she placed the dress reverently on the bed so she could admire it more. "And I'm wearing that on my wedding day!"

"I'm so happy for you Kao," Sayo said grinning. "Kenshin is going protect you with his life, so I know you'll be in good hands,"

Kaoru smiled.

"…and he'd be damned to hell twice and back just for you."

"Really?" Kaoru asked, raising an eyebrow as another squeal of laughter erupted from her throat. "And how would you know?"

"It's down right obvious, Kao. I have eyes to observe as well as a brain to process everything in." Before the princess could reply to that statement, a knock on the door interrupted her.

"Come in."

The door was pushed opened, and Sano appeared holding a white rose. "Hi," he greeted, grinning from ear to ear.

"Sano! What brings you here?" Kaoru asked, as she eyed the flower he was holding.

"Well, I have a date to pick up," he replied, quirking his eyebrows up and down playfully. Kaoru laughed. At the corner of her eye, she saw Sayo coughing, as her face flushed like a big, ripe tomato.

Kaoru let out a gasp.

There was a moment of silence, when none said a word. Then-

"Now, since when were you going to tell me you're going out with Sano?"


Kaoru smiled as stood alone in her room, recalling the earlier events. Shaking her head when her thoughts struck on Sayo and Sano, she let out an unknowing laugh as she looked out the window.

She was glad that Sano and Sayo were going out. Kaoru wanted everyone to be as happy as she was.

Kaoru felt a pair of strong arms circling her waist and the familiar sense of happiness kicked in. She didn't need to turn around to see who it was. Instead, she leaned back against him, smiling as she touched the arms that encircled the span of her small waist. She felt his lips graze her cheek in a small kiss.

"Hello," she said softly, with a smile.

He did not reply as he hid his head in the crook of her neck.

Both of them did not say anything, as they held on to each other.

Then, hesitantly, he spoke up. "Kao… I… I need to tell you something."

"What about?" she asked happily.

Inwardly flinching at her tone, he despised himself even more. He knew he was going to ruin her mood in a matter of moments.

"Something very, very …important." He said gravely, turning her around to face him.

She gazed into his eyes, and she could see that he was greatly troubled. Immediately her smile faded, as she asked worriedly. "What's wrong?"

He was downcast, as he held her hands.

Sighing deeply, he opened his mouth. "I know for a fact that you have always been curious, wanting to know about the past three years…"

She nodded, not knowing where this was leading to.

Silence.

'God, this is so hard.' He thought uneasily.

"But if you are not ready to tell me, if you don't want to… its fine," Kaoru interrupted, sensing his turmoil and not wanting to be the cause of his pain. "I trust you."

"No, I'll tell you." He said briskly.

Kenshin closed his eyes at the stab he felt in his heart at her words.

"I trust you."

Finally, he decided not to waste anymore precious time. She needed to hear this, no matter how hard it was for him to tell her.

He just prayed that she would understand.

"Three years ago, my father … my father was kidnapped. The captor – Takeda Kanryuu, had intended me to run 'errands' for him, just so that one day I could redeem my father's life. I had no choice, but to follow his orders. I could not rebel against him, for the sake of my father's life.

I could not find any traces of my father's whereabouts, no matter how hard I had searched. Word got out that my father had died instead, with the people not knowing the truth that he was held hostage.

For three years…three years I have been killing people mercilessly, killing them in cold blood…" he recalled painfully, closing his eyes for a brief moment.

She did not know what to say. Saying that she was surprised to hear this, was a total understatement. She was clearly more than shocked.

It was all so sudden as the words started to spill out from his mouth, as if having been kept in for so long, bursting out from him.

"I did not mean to kill those people Kao… I had no choice," he said hoarsely, as he opened his eyes.

It reflected pain and regret.

He looked so remorseful and full of grief, that she felt like holding him tightly like how a mother would hug a child, reassuring him that it's alright.

Rubbing his hands gently, she encouraged him to go on.

"Your father… your father had once banished my father's captor once upon a time. He was caught sneaking in opium and other drugs into the palace, poisoning some of the maids and guards in this palace. Many people had died because of the drug addiction, after they had spent all of their savings purchasing them.

Time passed by, and they could offer no more money to buy more opium, since they had ran out of money. Some of them even killed themselves, because they could not tolerate anymore of the suffering. Because of your father's kindness, he sparred him his life.

Even then, he did receive his punishment. He was whipped, stripped of his treasures and possessions… and he was then banished into another land." Kenshin said unsteadily.

There was a pained look in his eyes and … also something else.

He looked like he dreaded telling her what happened next.

She did recall something like this, when she was very much younger. Maybe when she was two or so, but she did remember the days when the palace's servants started to go missing.

Then suddenly, something struck a chord.

It was as if she got splashed with icy cold water, shaken by a rude awakening.

Like the missing puzzle suddenly found it's place and completed the picture, everything falling together and clicking.

Kaoru couldn't breathe.

She looked up slowly at him.

He looked almost frightened to tell her the next part of his story.

Almost.

But she deserves to know.

Slightly wavering, Kaoru ordered herself to calm down. 'No, it can't be.. It just can't be... not Kenshin, he wouldn't…'

"W-What… What happened next?" she asked, trying to quell the sick feeling that was rising in her stomach.

Silence.

"Kenshin…" Kaoru prodded.

"Kanryuu was vengeful. He never did forget what you father had done to hi-"

A sharp exclamation of pain slipped past Kaoru's lips as she pulled her hands from his hold and hugged herself. "Tell me you didn't." she cut him off, as she suddenly felt herself trembling.

Blood was roaring through her ears as she stared at Kenshin through a read haze.

'He wouldn't.'

"Tell me, you didn't," Kaoru said calmly as she stared into his eyes, fighting back the tears that threatened to overflow. This was Kenshin. And Kenshin would never hurt her that way. He wouldn't.

'He couldn't.'

But to her utmost dismay, he did not say anything.

He gazed at her face for an agonizingly long time, words refusing to come out from his mouth. Finally, his head dropped as his hair obscured his face from her eyes.

"Tell me you didn't," she demanded this time. She needed him to tell her that he didn't. As long as those words came out from his mouth, she didn't care if it was a lie.

"Kao I-"

"TELL ME YOU DIDN'T!!" she cried out pleadingly, as she clutched his shirt. Her tears threatened to fall, but she would not allow it. Not now. Not yet.

"Kao, listen to me, please…" he begged, as he grabbed hold of her hands again.

She was shaking her head, not believing what was happening.

"I'm… I'm sorry…" he whispered silently, as he crushed her to his chest.

Her whole world stopped then.

They were right. They had tried to warn her, but she had been too stubborn to listen.

Kenshin killed her father.

Letting out a painful scream, she wrenched herself away from his embrace, backing away from him like he was some kind of monster. Her tears ran unchecked down her cheeks. "Tell me that you're lying to me," she rasped. "Tell me you didn't do it, and I'll believe you.."

"I don't want to li-"

"God Kenshin, tell me you're lying! Tell me, NOW!" she yelled at him. "Please tell me! Tell me!" Why wouldn't he say it? Couldn't he tell that her world was falling apart?

"Please say it… say it Kenshin…" she sobbed. She doubled over, falling to her knees as the pain became too much.

He remained quiet as he looked down. Receiving his silence as an answer, she started crying even more.

"H-How could you…" she choked out as she tried to get up, not wanting to appear weak before her father's murderer. That was what he was, her father's murderer. The realization made her feel sick inside. "We were going to get married… Oh G-God..."

"We were going to get married…" she repeated, feeling her whole life suddenly crushing.

Kenshin moved to help her up, he tried to hold her in his arms but she immediately pulled away. "Get away from me!" she cried out. Kenshin wouldn't let her go but she wrenched her hand free and slapped him harshly across the face.

He instantly froze as soon as he felt her palm connect with his cheek. He felt something rising within him, but he forced himself to stay calm. He knew if he gave in to his harsh side, things would end up worse than it already was.

"HOW COULD YOU?!" she screamed at him as she pummeled his chest with her fists. Suddenly, she stopped as if even the mere fact of hitting him, touching him, disgusted her. She moved away, her hands gripping the fabric of her dress. She remained sobbing.

Painful, enduring silence ensued. The only sound to be heard was Kaoru's tearful sobs and then that too ceased and a complete stillness took over.

Turning his head to look at her, he felt a twinge of anguish when he saw her face.

Her eyes were red from crying, as her tears continued to roll down. Her eyes were tight shut, as if she expected to wake up from a horrible nightmare. She looked so torn apart, so poignant, so …heartbroken.

'Like a delicate, porcelain doll, shattered into a million pieces.'

"I'm sorry." He repeated dejectedly. "I'm so sorry."

Hoping against hope that she would tell him it was alright, telling him that she would forgive him, her next words stung him more than he could ever imagine.

"Get out." She replied icily.

Slowly taking small steps towards her, he tried to take hold of her arm but she evaded harshly. "Don't touch me." She hissed, looking up.

Her eyes were cold and downright hard.

"Get, out." She commanded, expecting him to comply.

"Kao-"

"GET OUT!! Get out now!!" her voice quavered, threatening to breakdown again.

"I ju-"

"Please. J-Just.. leave. Go away. L-Leave me alone…" she whispered, with her back turned to him. Her shoulders were slumped, and she refused to look at him.

"I can't… I really do love you-"

"Did you love me when you decided to thrust your sword through my father's chest?" she asked softly.

"I… I had no choic-"

Too blinded by anger, she interrupted him again, "If you do love me, you would leave me alone."

Filled with pain beyond imagination, he swallowed as he replied quietly. "I… I understand."

After a few seconds that seemed like eternity, her door closed silently.

Supporting herself with the edge of her wooden table, she tried with all her might to remain calm and rational. But at last, knowing that she was unable to take it in anymore, she started crying again. Pushing away glasses and fragile things from the table to the ground, they smashed into pieces all together in a piercing sound.

Taking out her anger on a Persian vase, she threw it to the door, ending it in shreds of ceramic. Next she took hold of a piece of china, and flung it to the wall. She started sobbing all over again, repeating to herself over and over again that this situation wasn't happening.

That it was all just a bad dream, a bad dream which she couldn't seem to wake up from. Feeling her strength being drained out bit by bit, she crouched by her bed and wept.


AN: Wow. I had a pretty hard time writing this chapter, since I'm not used to writing such….. scenes. Anyway, hugs to Scented Candles for being the all wonderful pretty candle that you are, as well as my super-fast (seriously) beta-reader.

Anyway…. I actually finished this chapter on Tuesday, but because I spent 2½ hours typing it, I had no time to re-read it (I'm only supposed to use the computer an hour a day).

But being the nice author that I am (hint), I wanted to update as soon as possible :D. Though there aren't any promises that I would update chapter seven early. So… Yeah.

I might update chapter two for my newest fiction, Flying High. I shall see how things would work out :).

Now show me some love and review! And a happy Chinese New Year to those who celebrate!