Chapter Fourteen
Dear Diary,
It's been only a few days and Malfoy can not leave me alone. I tried going for a walk to process my thoughts, but he followed me. I tried spending the night in the tower, but he knows where it is, and I managed to hide just before he walked in. He stares at me during meals. I can feel his eyes boring into the back of my head. He follows me out of the meals, probably hoping to catch me alone. He follows me everywhere. I was in the library the past too evenings after dinner, and he was there too, staring at me pretending to read a book. If I went into the stacks, I could always hear his footsteps mimicking my own.
Seems like rather stalker-esque behavior to me. I feel like I should tell somebody, but I have nobody who would listen. I can't talk to any Weasley, because they hate him with a fiery passion burning deep into their souls. I can't tell Harry because he feels the same way, and they've been rivals since first year. I can't tell Parvati or Lavender, because they would tell everyone who I don't want to know. I can't even go to Neville! Malfoy's bullied him so much, he'd probably hate me.
So I'm in quite a pickle. You know what my problem is? I want him to follow me. I don't want him to, but then I do. I don't want him to because it would just be so easy to forget everything and move on. But I want him to because...in some sick twisted part of my mind, I want more too. More sex, more of Draco Malfoy, more everything.
Everything I just wrote is so wrong...
How the bleedin' hell can I still want him? Consarnit, I'll bloody tell you why! He's so bloody brilliant in bed! Not that I've ever actually been with him in a bed, per se, but still... He's so talented. Made me feel beautiful, kissed me like I've never been kissed by anyone, and he actually enjoyed it too. He had such a fire in his eyes... I want to see what's behind that fire.
Good Lord, I know that it's so wrong...but it feels so right. Should I just ignore my nagging doubts and horrible feelings of betrayal?
Yes I should. Next time Draco follows me I'm going to confront me. Before I do anything, I want to know the truth. How he's able to just forget the past seven years of hatred for me, and why he wants to get to know me.
Maybe once I've really talked to him, I'll be able to make a decision.
Until then? I guess I'll just focus on work... I'm going to go absolutely mad one of these days.
xoxox
Hermione
Author's Note Time!
Sorry for taking FOREVER to update everyone! I got a job for the summer, and I've been quite busy. Plus one of my computers has a virus of some sort, so Microsoft Word won't work on it. And my sister's been occupying the other one for the most part, so I've had no chance to write. I'm going to be busy with a lot of summer work for my AP classes this coming school year, so don't expect an immediate update. The next chapter is going to be much longer, and very important, so I want to take a lot of time to work on it. I'm also going to be computerless August 9-16, so I'm hoping for an update by the end of the month. I know this one was kind of short, but I hope you liked it! Please review!
