I do not own any of the characters of the television show Lost. Nor do I own the used song: "As I lay Me Down To Sleep", by Sophie B. Hawkins.
I wonder why I feel so high
The flames of the campfire surrounded her with shadows. Every single move she made seemed to make magical figures in the sand. He silently watched the shadows, the movements, from the border of the bushes. It gave him that special feeling.
I wonder why I feel so high
Though I am not above the sorrow
Heavy hearted
She was beautiful. Even from such a far distance he saw that. She was by far the most gorgeous woman on the island. The way she could hold her hands behind her back when she walked, the cute accent she had when he heard her speak, even the wound on her chin, everything seemed perfect in Charlie's eyes. They had barely gotten a chance to talk, but when she did it made him feel happy, it was almost like a drug to him.
I'm still recalling things you said to make me feel alright
I carried them with me today
Now
Charlie sighed as he nervously rubbed with his hand under his nose. He turned his eyes away from her, because even staring at her made him feel uncomfortable. Suddenly he heard a noise behind him and when he quickly turned around he saw Locke coming out of the bushes. Charlie wondered what he had been doing so late in the evening, but he didn't ask. Maybe then Locke wouldn't ask him anything either.
"She seems lonely", Locke said.
"Who?", Charlie asked innocent.
"You know who", Locke replied with a mysterious smile on his face. "Talk to her. I know you want to and she can use the company."
"She doesn't need mine."
"You don't know that until you talked to her. Or is there anything you're afraid of? You don't look like a cowherd to me Charlie", Locke answered.
"I am not", Charlie said indignant. He waited for another reply from Locke, but none came. He just looked at Charlie, waiting for him to go to Claire. Screwing up his nose Charlie said "I am going, I am going already".
I'll run to meet you
Barefoot barely breathing
He walked with firm passes towards Claire, to prove he wasn't afraid of it. But he felt his heart beating in his throat and he felt like he couldn't breath. When he nearly reached her he looked over his shoulder, seeing Locke watching him every move. And when he turned around he suddenly was there. He stood behind Claire. Seeing her turn around because of the noise his feet made in the sand he gave her a cheesy smile as he tried to formulate a decent sentence. "Is this seat taken?", he asked as he pointed to the emptiness at the left side of Claire.
"It will be when you come to sit here."
"Yes I was planning on doing that", Charlie said as he sat down. He pulled up his knees and twiddled with the frayed edges of his jeans. An awkward silence followed and when Charlie finally opened his mouth to say something Claire did the same. They laughed.
"You first", Charlie said with a little nod as he stared into the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen.
"Thanks."
"For what?", Charlie asked confused.
"For you sitting here, next to me. People won't seem to look me in the eye here. I think I scare them. The baby, like I'm some time bomb responsibility just waiting to go off. But you're different. You look me in the eyes, you talk to me and you make me feel like a normal person and not something you can't look at or touch because it might break. So thank you Charlie."
Till you call my name
And it sounds like church bells
Or the whistle of a train
On a summer evening
Charlie felt special when she said his name. But he pushed the feeling aside. He shouldn't be thinking these things. She was a precious creature, carrying a child and he was a useless heroin addict.
"You don't scare me", he sad as he shook his head. He took little bits of sand in between his fingers and threw them into the fire. Staring at the waving flames he quietly said "I think everyone else is just too busy with trying to figure how to get off the island. I am not useful around here, they don't need me to interfere in whatever they are doing, so I just came here to sit next to you."
"You are useful, Charlie", Claire repeated as she smiled to him. "Don't talk about yourself as if you are not. Everyone here has their tasks, well maybe except for me. Maybe I am useless, I am more a burden anyway."
"No you're not", Charlie said indignant and he turned his head around. He looked in those beautiful eyes again and saw the sorrow written in it. He knew those eyes would never look at him as he did to them. It was stupid to think that they would. He realized there was no harm to tell her his secret. He needed to tell someone.
It's not too near for me
Like a flower I need the rain
"You know what I was doing when the plane crashed?", he said out of the blue. "I was in the toilet, stuffing heroine up my nose." Charlie looked away from those eyes, he didn't want to know what they were saying to him. "I am a junkie Claire. Every day on this island I can think of almost nothing else than getting my fix. I don't help out, I don't have idea's how to solve this mess, I am too busy with my addiction."
Though it's not clear to me
Every season has it's change
"You're sitting here aren't you?", Claire said. Not seeming to be shocked by Charlie's confession. "Keeping me company is helping me out. And I have seen what you have done. From the very first day we got here you've been doing nothing but help others."
Charlie looked surprised up and saw nothing in her eyes had changed after he told her. "You're talking about the old Charlie", Claire went on. So maybe he was a useless person as you call it, although I doubt that. But you changed. We are all others here. We have to be, else we don't survive. See it as a second chance, with new people. You'll be seeing me every day, and Jack, and mr. Locke, and I doubt that will be for just a few more days."
And I will see you
When the sun comes out again
A smile crossed Charlie's face as he realized she was right. The island actually gave him a new chance. Okay so no Driveshaft, but also less temptation to use drugs, because he almost ran out of that. And no Liam to pretend he was the caring big brother but behind his back broke the one thing that felt right in his life: the music. And the best thing of it all. Like Claire said. She'd be here. Every day.
As I lay me down to sleep
This I pray
That you will hold me dear
Though I'm far away
I'll whisper your name into the sky
And I will wake up happy
Charlie laid himself in the sand. Putting his hands behind his head he watched the sky. The stars seemed to make to most complicated patters. "Thanks", he said, still staring at the sky.
"For what?", Claire asked.
"The same reason", Charlie said. "For you sitting here, talking to me. I thought I scared everyone away. I haven't told anyone, but some of them might figured out what I am. And that would think exactly as you put it: like I am some time bomb of responsibility just waiting to go off. But you I told, and you don't seem to mind."
Claire looked Charlie in the eyes and he felt a connection. They were so different, yet they were dealing with problems that could be compared. When she turned her head back to the flames, Charlie laid his head back in the sand. For the first time since he left Liam's house and he got on the plane he felt like he had someone to talk to again. As his eye lids closed he felt happy.
When the sun comes out again
I will wake up happy
This I pray
A/N One attempt to write a song fic. One attempt to write a short story actually (Usually I write much longer ow well). Reviews please :D I appreciate well argumented critism.
