A/N: Strictly AU, this was originally intended to go into my "Moments" story, where Ezrikos would be the original female character, but I decided that's not the direction I wanted their relationship to go, so I made a new original character (she's just some soldier named Jessica, it doesn't really matter) instead. If you've read "Moments" you will at least have some idea what I'm talking about and if you haven't read it don't bother looking for it because I'm taking it down and replacing it with the first chapter of the story it was eventually intended to be, mostly because many people have been asking about it. See, that's the power the little review button has: it makes me stay up all night writing this inane crap just because you people express slight interest in it. I sort of indirectly stole a line from Koschka by the way; see if you can spot it.


One night, as they lie side by side in the sweat-slick aftermath, not touching, not looking at each other, just lying there breathing hard, she speaks for the first time.

"Why are we doing this?"

He sighs. "I would say comfort, but lately it feels more like desperation."

"Desperation." She gives a little laugh. "That's a good word for it."

"Jessica…"

She ignores him, talking over his vague warning. "We have impossibly difficult jobs, and occasionally, while trying to defend Atlantis with the military equivalent of string cheese, we have bad days."

"Occasionally might be an understatement."

She keeps talking like he hasn't said anything. "So I go to your room, or you come to mine, and we have incredibly satisfying sex, but we don't…I guess share is the word I'm looking for. We kiss but it isn't gentle and neither is the sex, and when we're finished I get dressed and leave. Or you do, if it's my room."

"You think we should talk?"

She sighs. "I'm not a therapist, Major, but this can't be healthy."

"You know? When we're naked in bed together, you can call me John. In fact, I think you probably should. And no, I don't think this is particularly healthy."

"But?"

"I need it, and I think you do too, or I wouldn't be using you. That desperate I'm not."

She snorts, amused. "Of course not, John. You could have any woman on this base. And probably most of the Athosians."

"I don't want any of them."

She looks at him, startled. "What?"

He just stares back, not saying anything.

"I should go." She's uncomfortable now, for all her talk about "sharing", the actual prospect scares her.

"No," he tells her, "you should stay."

There's a long pause while she studies him, hesitating.

"I could stay."