Hiya readers!! It is about time I updated huh? Well sorry for the delay I am currently between computers and so I lost my chapter six for a while and didn't know where to pick up from. But it's all good now. Oh and for legal purposes I must state that I don't own gundam wing. whispering though everyone knows I really do.

Sam: Do not!!

PT: Do too.

Sam: Nyyuuuu... I do...

PT: rolls eyes Sure.... On with the usual stuff.. my thanks to my beta Sam for helping and inspiring me... but no cookies this time!!

Sam: BUT BUT BUT!!! ::cries::

In this chapter I would like to send out special thanks to Duo-23 for becoming a very loyal reviewer. This one's for you Duo!! So I hope you enjoy this chapter!!

Insidious Dreams Chapter Seven

Watching a bird. He was watching a bird. A fucking bird! Was I mad? Oh hell yea I was flaming pissed. Pulling out my pistol I didn't even think before I shot the bird through the heart. I instantly regretted it. The doctors all began to stare. Heero looked away ashamed and worst of all Quatre flinched away. I had frightened my little brother. At a time when he needed me most instead of helping him I shot a damned blue bird through the heart.

But Quatre didn't just flinch. If only it were that damn simple. He ran. He picked up the big machine he was attached to and he ran like Satan himself was at his heels. I followed as quickly as I could, naturally, but when he rounded the corner he seemed to disappear into thin air. He's always been able to do that. Disappear quickly and not be found until he feels like being found. He must have had some reason somewhere in his past to do a lot of hiding.

I was terrified for him. He was hurt so badly... anything could happen to him. He was already just barely clinging to life if he stayed in hiding too long... he could be very badly hurt even killed! Why didn't I think before acting? Why did I shoot that damned bird?

Why am I asking that? I know why I did it. I was mad. I was upset. I needed an outlet and I chose the bird Heero was watching. I knew he should have been watching Quatre so I eliminated what was currently holding his attention. It was stupid, idiotic, and immature... but it worked. Heero was paying attention to Quatre now, or at least to the fact that he was absent from the room. Probably only because he knew how much danger Quatre was in though. He never pays attention to anyone just for the hell of it. Least of all me. But why should he? I have done nothing to deserve the attention of such a perfect creature I am nothing but a lowly street rat. The scum of L2.

But now was not the time to be brooding over my heritage and upbringing. Quatre was hiding somewhere in this hospital and we had to find him before he got hurt. So much could happen to him... I was worried out of my skull. Tears began to fill the corners of my eyes as we continued to look for three hours and could not find him anywhere. Finally I checked the crawl space under the stairs and sure enough he was curled in there shaking like a leaf.

His face was so pale... I spent a few minutes just staring at his pale face wondering how I could have him so terrified. I almost started crying all over again but I could also see how my emotional pain was tearing him up inside. "Hey..." I whispered crawling in beside him. "Mind if I sit in here too?" As soon as I entered the crawl space I wished I hadn't. Quatre did something he had never done before. He moved away as if frightened... of me!!

I heard a shot. I heard a shot and my head started spinning so fast I almost thought I was the one who was hit but then I realized I was not in the excruciating pain that would come with that. My gaze fell to the victim of Duo's pistol. A small innocent bird. I could not take the contradicting emotions in the room anymore. I reached over and grabbed the machine which was attached to me.

The box was heavy. I couldn't even remember what was in it because I was hyped up on some weird drug the doctors had me on but it was heavy. I groaned as I lifted it from it's stand. I had to get out of there. It felt like I was carrying a lead weight that was going to drag me down into the very earth. As soon as I lifted the box I thought the world had turned upside down and I was floating. It made me feel very light and confused and I couldn't even remember why I was scared and wanted to run anymore but I knew I had to get out.

I ran down the halls. Everything I passed was nothing but a blur. I knew I was being pursued and that only made me want to run faster and faster until I tripped over something and fell forwards. I think I broke my nose because my eyes automatically filled with a substance made of primarily salt and water called tears. Everything was spinning. Nothing made sense. I was scared, lost, confused... and then I saw it. An opening. Where did it lead? I didn't know. But I ducked in anyway. It was small so I huddled in on myself and waited.

What was I waiting for? I didn't even know anymore. But I was pretty sure it wasn't the person that came crawling in through the opening after what felt like days. Duo. My best, dearest, oldest friend Duo. I loved him dearly but he just wasn't who I wanted to see right now. I moved away from him. He shot innocent birdies. He emitted extreme anger. I wanted someone else. Not him.

My movements seemed to shock him and he exited my space. Good. I didn't want him in my space. After he was gone I didn't see anyone else for a long time. I was lonely. I was ready to settle for almost anyones company. Even people who killed innocent little birdies. When he came next he knelt down and coaxed me out in a way similar to that of how you would coax a rabid animal into tameness. I crawled into his arms and I wept. It wasn't where I wanted to be... but it felt safe anyway. I let him take me back to the hospital room. That felt safe too.

But I didn't feel truly safe till I saw him. My love. My protector. My home. I was home. The door creaked open letting a slight breeze into the room and fluttering the papers on the desk. My eyes shifted from the bed sheets they had been securely focused on. I looked in the doorway and there stood Trowa. The man who couldn't seem to keep from hurting me. The man who had raped me when I told him I would not have sex with him. The man that was standing in the door to my hospital room with eyes that begged for forgiveness. The man I loved. I gazed deep into the crystal green depths that seemed to bore a hole in my soul and I smiled. I was home.