Disclamer : MIIINE ALL MIIINE ! … eer… The evil side of my brain is taking control again.
I would like to thank very, very very much the only person who reviewed me! It really warmed up my heart.
And the rest of you who didn't review well… YOU SHALL ALL BURN IN HELL FOR ALL ETERNITY.. Or at least a couple of seconds…
(Oh-uh I feel the waves of hate emanating from the readers)
Short chappie! Next one longer! Promise!
Don't Blame Me
Chtp 2
The apartment that fate obviously wanted me to go and visit was perfect.
It was big, and luminous. There were two bedrooms: one big next to the kitchen and the other one slightly smaller, next to the bathroom, with a balcony. The living room was in between both rooms and was twice as big as the smallest bedroom.
The kitchen was small. If you didn't bump into the oven, the handle of the refrigerator lodged itself in one's butt. Oliver didn't care; if needed, the kitchen could be enlarged thanks to magic.
The bathroom was big enough. A real, antique bath tub was in the middle of the room.
Obviously the previous owners had watched a bit too much 'Changing Rooms' (which in Oliver's opinion was surly a conception invented by the V-guy: basically some lunatics ran to your house, trashed it, and you were supposed to be all happy about it).
The room was all 'under water aquatic'. Some one had squished a toilet and a sink in a corner of the bathroom, just against the end of the bathtub. The rest of the room was painted in blue colours and hideously tacky plastic fishies and sea stars were attached with strings to the roof.
Charming. The lack of taste was even palpable for Oliver.
Oliver….
Oliver is a completely sane person. Just ignore the fact that he talks in the third person about HIMSELF. And also ignore the foam sprouting from his lips.
Hermione, wouldn't you mind shut your mouth?
No, contrary to what to think, Oliver is NOT schizophrenic. He just channel surf his brain…
HERMIONE ! Put your fist in your mouth or I'll lodge something entirely else down your throat…
Kinky threats…. . . . Disgusting, yet strangely arousing…
Err….
So even I could see how tasteless the bathroom was. Thank goodness the rest of the apartment, expect the bigger bedroom, had old white walls (which were now grey). The bigger bedroom had red retro wallpaper from the happy hippie 70ies.
The apartment was all in all in a good condition. The wall paper was falling off, and the rooms needed to be repainted, and you had definitely to do against the hideous bathroom. Small problems that magic could solve in a blink of an eye.
The only minus thing was that there was no chimney; but I figured out that I could install the Floo Network somehow. Lots of Muggleborns lived in muggle houses and they managed.
The old granny had stalked me through the apartment and enthusiastically showed me around.
I understood why fate wanted me to take this apartment.
It was great.
Of course, the old lady was quite surprised as I told her I was going to take the apartment straight away.
Of course, whilst I signed all the necessary papers, the old granny felt compelled to tell the whole story of the house.
… Great.
I thought I was stuck with the granny for the hours to come, as I heard a lock turn, and two voices approaching the living room we were standing in.
A young woman and an older man came into the room. The woman was obviously happy about something and widely shook hands with the man.
I should have sensed something bad…
Bad? What do you mean, BAD?
I was there first! I had cast my eye on that apartment since ages. I had transferred half of the money on the old grandpa's account.
Ha! But I signed the contract first. So I was the legal official owner.
But I paid the money, so it made me the owner of half of the apartment.
Hermione, you ARE the half-owner of the apartment.
Oooh! Yes, my glass is INDEED half-full.
The young woman looked vaguely familiar. Maybe she was one of my Quidditch fans. Maybe she was the creepy girl who sent me naked pictures of her and letters written in her own blood. She could be crazy enough to stalk me.
But no, it couldn't be her. The scary girl had darker hair.
Well, because she has lots of piercings and a couple of tattoos, she might eventually be some singer from a band. Yes, that could be it! I have to go to these charity galas and other festivities with my (now ex-) girlfriend. I surely met this weird girl there.
But no, again it couldn't be her. I would have remembered if someone would have a lion tattoo in the neck.
Lion- Gryffindor!
Of course! She was from school – Hogwarts! But not in my year. She was younger than me. Light brown hair in wild curls. Brown, rust red eyes. Tanned olive skin, and a little exotic style- maybe Spanish.
Well, she had to be in Gryffindor – no one else would have a lion tattoo. It was impossible that she would have been on the Quidditch team- I would have remembered her, and besides I still have contact to those that were in the Gryffindor House Team.
She… Curly hair! Of course! She was Harry potter's friend. Bookish girl!
YES! THAT girl! The one who saved my last Quidditch season in my last year! Something Granger! Harmony maybe? Nyah – it was really uncommon…. Hellevi – urk, no, Helena? –Too usual… Hermine? ..Hermine…. Something like that… Hermione? OOOhh! Yes! Hermione Granger!
She was a Muggleborn… I think. Wasn't she frozen by that serpent thing in my Sixth Year? I think so…
Ooooh! Of course! Hermione Granger! I've seen her at that other organization meeting! Order of the Phoenix thingie!
Really smart girl. Possibly a brainiac. She'll surely be all tidy and do all the house work and stuff. Surely here to study some more and couldn't stand the campuses because of the noise. Heh… It wouldn't be difficult to dismiss her I guess.
I couldn't have been more wrong
Then again, she looked a bit scary with her dark make up and various holes in her face.
Whilst Oliver had these deep inner thoughts, I again was wondering what on earth did a fake macho do in my recently bought apartment.
I might be a Know-It-All, but at least, I am a useful one. I can remember very much. I recognized the fake-pretty, toothpaste-smiling, fake macho man as Oliver Wood, the Quidditch crazed moron.
Yes Hermione trying to say something here?
Well not a moron exactly. I had met a three times after he graduated from Hogwarts: once before the one and only Intercontinental Quidditch match I went to, the second time during a mass meeting of the Order, where famous Quidditch players, bands, actors and other known, reputed and influencing persons had been and where it was checked that no one was a death eater, and the third time I just saw a glance of him in Diagon, Alley, surrounded by small, idolizing fans asking for an autograph.
So you could understand I didn't have a very developed opinion about him….
Hermione, every person you don't think has a 'developed opinion' is considered as a brain-dead moose by you.
So? Your point being?
… Nothing love, forget it.
Both of us stopped dead talking as we finally recognized each other.
Then, in perfect synchronisation we yelled:
"- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"
Actually Hermione yelled it. Or tried to with the raspy voice of hers. (Hermione, you should consider to quit smoking. It's rumoured it's bad for your health.)
"- Yes Brenda dear (Brenda is the granny in case you wonder), who is this boy?"
"- This fine young man just bought the apartment."
The man's face went blank.
"- So did I. I just sold it to this young lady."
