Peyton smiled as she finished her dinner and began clearing the dishes. It had been a long time since she even felt like smiling but there was one man who could always bring joy to her heart and a grin to her face. Larry Sawyer. Her father.
He had come home early from a job and surprised her. Throwing her arms around him, Peyton had never been that happy to see someone in her life. It felt good. It felt normal. Having her daddy back made all the insanity just seem to disappear.
"How long this time?" she asked in a quiet, hopeful voice.
He had been in the house only a few hours but the question of his leaving always seemed to come up before he could even unpack.
"I have a week home and then I'm off to New Zealand for a month or so."
Peyton tried not to react. She was used to his long absences but it didn't make it any easier.
"Hey Bug", he smiled, using the nickname he hadn't called her since she was a little girl. "How about we go out for some ice cream? My treat."
Who could resist ice cream?
"Let me grab my jacket."
She ran to her room and did so, bounding back towards the living room with renewed energy.
"Dad, I'm ready, I…"
Peyton stopped dead in her tracks. Her father was there but he wasn't alone. Beside him in the living room was Jake Jaegielski.
"Hey Peyton", he said.
She couldn't greet him back. She couldn't move. She could hardly breathe.
"Jake…"
"I'll let you two have your privacy", Larry said as he made himself scarce.
When they were alone, she still didn't know what to say. Tension loomed heavy as both shifted uncomfortably. Then he lifted his head and approached her carefully before wrapping his arms around her. She wanted desperately to resist but it was hard. Like so many times before, his embrace melted her like butter.
"What are you doing here?" she finally whispered.
"I had to see you. Pey, I just couldn't walk away like that."
"Where's Jenny?"
"With Nikki. I didn't bring her. I…I wanted to see you. I feel bad the way things ended. I just wanted to make sure you're okay."
"I'm fine", she nodded with a forced smile. "What about you? How's your life? How's Jenny?"
How's Nikki, she really wanted to ask but refrained almost afraid of the answer.
"I'm okay", he shrugged. "Raleigh is cool. I like it, I guess. School is okay. The transition was pretty easy. And the job thing turned out pretty good, too. Jenny, she's uh…she's adjusting. But we're happy."
"That's good. Um, I'm glad."
"Thanks. Peyton, thank you for everything."
"It's cool. Don't worry about it, okay?"
"I do. I can't help it. I worry about you."
"What about Nikki?" she blurted out.
Damn. So much for subtlety.
"She's okay", Jake nodded hesitantly.
More awkward silence.
"Are you two…"
Peyton couldn't take it anymore. Curiosity was killing her.
"We uh, we spend a lot of time together because of our daughter. There were hard feelings but we decided to put that in the past and get along for Jenny's sake. We want what's best for her."
Peyton agreed.
"Oh. Well, that's good."
"Yeah…there's a whole lot of history there between us."
"Is there a future?" Peyton asked before she could stop herself.
The billion dollar question. Jake sighed. He wanted to be honest but he didn't want to hurt her.
"It could be. I…I don't know. It's too soon to tell. We're taking it slow for now."
Peyton sighed. She thought hearing the confirmation would be the equivalent of being gutted and tortured with a hot, searing knife. But it wasn't that bad. For her it was closure almost. It was peace.
"Okay."
"Look, Peyton I'm sorry…"
"Don't be. Please Jake. I just want you to be happy. You and Jenny both. You deserve it. And if you're happy then I'm happy for you."
"You're pretty amazing, you know that?"
"Jake…"
"No, I'm serious. You're the most complex yet extremely loving and unselfish human being I've ever met. You did a lot for Jenny. You did a lot for me. I'll never forget that. I promise you, Peyton. I know I hurt you and I'm sorry for that. I never meant to. I just want you to be okay."
"I am."
"I want you to be more than okay. I want you to be happy, too."
"I will be, Jake. I mean, I am."
"I just wish we could talk. I wish…I don't know, Peyton. Maybe a part of me wants things the way they used to be at least when we could talk to each other. I hate being a stranger to you."
"Why did you come here?"
"Honestly? I don't really know."
"I know you have to go back."
"I do", he repeated.
"I'm okay, Jake. My life has its ups and downs and yeah now I'm going through some things but it isn't your fault or your concern. You have your life and I have mine. We're totally separate now and that's fine. It doesn't mean we can't still care about each other but your thing is with Jenny and Nikki now."
"And you? What's your thing?"
Peyton laughed in spite of herself.
"I don't know", she shrugged. "I don't think I've found my thing yet but um…it's okay. I'm okay or at least I'm going to be."
Jake smiled too. He knew he had to see her that one final time.
"I love you, Peyton. I always will."
"I know", she said.
He placed a kiss on her cheek and they both knew it was time to go. And as quickly as he had appeared, Jake faded, leaving Peyton alone with the memories of the past and hopes for the future.
"You okay, Bug?" Larry peeped around the corner.
Peyton smiled at her dad but it wasn't a forced one.
"I'm good or at least I will be when you someone makes nice on that ice cream promise they owe me."
He looked at his daughter and instantly saw the beauty, strength and vulnerability she all had inherited from his beloved late wife. Maybe he couldn't take all the credit for doing such a good job of raising her but one thing was for certain…he had one good kid.
"I love you, Peyton", he smiled.
"Love you, too, Daddy."
