Kitera: Heyz pplz how ya been?
Lil: Sup i think this chap is our longest one
Kitera: lolz yeah
Lil: gotta another question for ya Yunie-star-Tidus-cutie
Kitera: We are interested but wat site we go to this final fantasy thingy?
Lil: Hmmmm yeah special thanks to Sorian, Yunie-star-Tidus-cutie, Shuanamitchell
Kitera: heyz Shuanamitchell i read your fic and it was great!! and Yunie-star-Tidus-cutie what happened to your funny one? anywayz enjoy Oh ThX clara for ur support ur story was excellent. Sorian why don't you write a fic? i'll be your first reviewer :)
Lil: Read and review!!!
Seifer wore a black robe that covered his whole body, he had a scar is between his eyes. He was a tall and muscular man and looked bigger than every else that was in the inn. Rikku never left her gaze. She closed her fist angrily; everyone was staring at his direction. Rikku's face flushed red, she wanted to kill this man right on the spot that he was standing, hot tears came unexpectedly from her eyes. Rikku reached to the back of her pocket and found a dagger, she took it out and was about to charge towards Seifer when Zell stopped her.
"Stop...he has two troops out there, we'll get him later I promise" Zell murmured in her ears
Seifer was smiling at her, and his gaze never left hers. He walked towards her a sword in his hand, as he walked towards her and slaughtered everyone he passed. He looked incredibly powerful but then he tripped over an old shoe and fell face flat on the floor. His face flushed red as everyone laughed. He picked himself up grumbling angrily then made his way towards them. Tears of laughter were prickling down Rikku's eyes. Seifer stood in front of their table. His two troops followed him closely behind.
"You should be a comedian cause you're so damn funny!" Rikku said laughing
"Tie them up" Seifer ordered angrily as he dusted his robe.
"You monster" Rikku whispered to him, "You stupid cow, pig, jerk, evil bad terrible crazy insane monster!"
"Take them to the dungeon" Seifer ordered
They sat on the cold stone of the dungeon. Squall sat cross leg as if were meditating The dungeon was small and dark but was big enough for them to sit.
"My mother" Squall said suddenly as he jerked his head up, "That mermaid was my mother".
"What? You're an idiot Squall, how can she be your mother?" Zell demanded
"Errr...."
"You have no fins
You can barley swim
You have no tail
And if I chuck you in the river
You would probably wail" Zell sang in a beautiful voice.
They all stared at him in amazement.
"Wow you can sing" Tidus remarked in an excited voice.
Rikku couldn't take it any more she got up and started rattling at the door.
"Oi you idiot let me out now!!! I swear I will kill you if you don't, don't you walk away from me you pig OIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII come back here I'm not done with you yet! How much did Seifer pay you anyways I'll double the price come here OIIIIIIIII" Rikku yelled
"Where's Yuna?" Tidus asked, he looked around them and couldn't see Yuna anywhere.
"I...dunno"
Rikku turned to them her eyes widen in fear, "Yuna? Where is she, oh my god, oh my god oh my god".
"Shut up rat" Zell snapped, "She might have escape, she might be our only hope left, yeah go yell some more".
Yuna waited until one of the commander turn around, she had a glass bottle in her hands then he bent down to pick up his penny, Yuna brought the bottle down hard on his head and the commander fell unconscious, Yuna striped him from his clothe then put it on quickly, hiding her face with a helmet.
"Sir Kaze" Yuna muttered reading the label on the commander's shirt.
She ran to dungeon to dungeon trying to find her friends. She saw two approaching guards coming her way.
"Act normal act normal" Yuna said to herself over and over again.
"Sir Kaze good evening sir" One of them said to her. Her heart was pounding so hard that she was afraid that it might explode.
"Arrgh yes good evening young sir" Yuna said trying her best to act like a man. The two of them laughed then swung one hand around shoulder, "Aye Kaze lets drink".
Yuna was about to refuse but she thought better of it, she could out drink them anytime. They entered the last dungeon and Yuna couldn't believe her luck, she heard Rikku's insults and she grinned.
"Cheers" He said handing her a cup full of wine.
"Aye" She said taking a sip.
After the second cup the two guards were beginning to get drunk, they swayed and sang a stupid song that they have made up, by the fifth cup they were knocked out completely.
"Stupid dumb arses" Yuna muttered to herself as she took their keys and started towards her friends.
Yuna could hear Rikku's moaning, "Let me out pig, dog, rat, stupid stinky ugly men".
When she was in eyesight to her friends she took off her helmet and they sighed in relief, then a pale-faced man with huge brown eyes, floppy red hair and was dressed in battle gear came running up to her. Yuna quickly bashed the helmet onto her head.
"Sir we are going to battle" he said quickly
"Battle? Me commanding?" Yuna asked shifting her helmet.
"Aye sir you are commanding 15 troops haven't you heard?" He asked as he raked his hair back.
"Errr I guess I have for---gotten how many men in each troop?" Yuna asked nervously keeping her face shielded with the helmet, she lifted the visor of the helmet but it fell back down again.
"Ninety five men sir"
Yuna was going to faint, she couldn't even use a sword properly and now she is commanding 1425 men into battle. The man was shaking her hard saying, "Quick they are attacking".
"Err right where is my sword?" Yuna asked looking around.
"Here sir" He said handing her a two handed sword.
As he handed it to her she dropped it then over balanced and landed on her butt.
"C'mon sir" he said helping her up.
He dashed ahead and Yuna trailed along dragging the sword behind her. As they entered the battlefield over 1000 men stood there watching her. They were all well armed in heavy armour, helmet and some have lances. The man that gave her the two handed sword helped her up onto a stallion. She sat there on the horse blinking at them stupidly while they stared at her with interest. Yuna cleared her throat; she could hear hundreds of thundering horse coming their way.
"Ummm.... we...we...just ummm we just" Yuna stammered with her words, she is certainly not going to help Seifer win this battle and she is not going to blow her cover either, "Err.... Lets see first"
The other army soon arrived and they looked out numbered, they had about 2000 men and the man that seemed to be leading was a hug and muscular man, he wore a fine armour and his helmet seemed familiar to her.
"Attack!!!" he roared
They were all rushing towards her and Yuna's troops were waiting for her words to attack.
"Ummm go do your stuff" Yuna said loudly.
They all obeyed running towards their enemy and the commander of the other side was charging towards her. She couldn't even swing her sword it was too heavy for her so she nudged her horse forward and into the fighting. She galloped away while the other commander galloped after her yelling insults.
"Oi you worthless man what? Running away? You wuss, stupid sissy!" he yelled some how that voice sounded familiar.
"Just keep running Yuna just keep going" She whispered to herself as she glanced back.
He caught up easily and she realised that she was separated from her troops, the man jumped on behind her and reached for his dagger while Yuna jumped off her horse, her helmet flew off and she hair spun madly.
"Yuna?" he asked as he hopped off her horse, "What are you doing here? Where is Rikku?" he asked.
She looked up at him and realised who he was, Wakka, Rikku's brother.
"You...are... one crazy man, I was about to rescue her...when you...attacked and...sent me.... 1425 men" Yuna said breathlessly as Wakka helped her up, and then they heard running footsteps. Wakka quickly slammed the helmet back onto Yuna's head.
"Quick pretend you are killing me," Wakka said as he laid himself on the grass.
"What?!?" Yuna yelled
"Quick point your sword here," Wakka said indicating his neck.
Yuna obeyed, confused she was. The man that was running towards her was speaking in gibberish.
"What?" Yuna yelled trying to be furious.
He was waving his hands around crazily and Yuna raised her eyebrow, then she realised that his tongue have been cut off, he was crouching on the ground moving his hands crazily and still Yuna didn't get what he meant.
"Yeah you go do that," She said as she waved her hands at him, he nodded and Yuna looked back at Wakka.
"You understand him?" She asked him as he burst out laughing.
"He...he asked if he could pee on my troops" Wakka laughed
"What?!? Ok never mind you got to go back," Yuna said quietly and Wakka nodded.
Wakka got up and yelled, "RETREAT!!!"
Immediately his troops raced towards him and Wakka galloped away murmuring, "Be careful".
Yuna's men came racing towards her cheering madly, they patted her on the back and their pats were so hard that she nearly toppled over.
"Lord Seifer would be pleased" one of them said grinning at her, "Let's feast people!"
Zell sat there looking glum while Squall was still in his meditating position, Tidus was anxious and Rikku was still swearing at the drunken guards. They had seen Yuna in the afternoon dressed in a commander's uniform then she was sent to command 15 troops, which made them even more worried.
"Yuna can't even use a sword properly not to mention commanding over 1000 men," Tidus muttered.
"Oi you let me out now!!!! I'll start crying if you don't and trust me you don't want me to cry!" Rikku screamed.
"Shut it Blondie" one of them said wearily.
"What?!? What did you call me huh? Stupid crazy mental bum cleaner! Go to hell" Rikku yelled back.
"You talking me to me or are you talking to me?" He asked a bottle of wine in his hands as he stumbled towards their cell.
"Yeah you, what you gotta problem? Rikku snapped.
"You want to fight huh bitch," he said poking at her.
"Yeah! C'mon" Rikku yelled as she bit his finger. He cried out in pain and pulled his hand away from his mouth. Then she grinned.
"You..." He started as he threw his bottle at her, she dodged and he missed instead of hitting Rikku, as he should have the bottle hit Zell's head. Zell's face reddened in anger. Rikku was laughing saying, "Oh you don't want to mess with him man he is like a animal!"
Zell got to his feet and the man that was guarding them took a step back.
"What was that for?" Zell demanded angrily, "You stupid cow hit her not me!"
"You...you gotta problem?" he said
"Oi use your own words next time bum chum" Rikku said angrily.
"Yeah I gotta problem, you know here?" Zell said as he pointed to the place where the bottle hit, "It hurts"
"Watcha gonna do? Watcha gonna do? You're all locked up!" he teased.
Zell took off his shoe and aimed it at the man saying, "Take this...Aha! Hurt yeah?"
The man rubbed his head dumbly and he was totally drunk.
"He's drunk," Squall muttered
"Yeah..."
They heard a click and the door swung open and there stood Seifer grinning at them...
They heard him say "Torture time..."
So......watcha pplz think of this chap? too long?
