Part 2! ;D
Later...
The group had met up again in a clearing far, far away from those S.W.A.T dudes.
They had all pretty much become sober and remembered what they had planned for the rest of this chapter.
"GIFT EXCHANGE!" shrieked Loku. You see, behind the scenes of the fanfic, the group had all pulled names out of Draco's hollow ass. Since there were only 11 characters in the fic, they decided to throw in Scotty too.
First up was Kyuki. She strolled over to Evien and held out her gift. "Here ya go, Evien!"
"YAY! Thanks, Kyuki!" said Evien as she took the present and began tearing the paper off. "OH MY GOD! Thanks again!" cried Evien as she hugged Kyuki and displayed her gift which was a box of poptarts.
Speaking of Evien, it was her turn. She ambled up to Harry and gave him a large box. "Hope you like it," she said with an evil grin.
Harry was unsure of the gift he held, but he decided to just open it anyway.
Out jumped Mr. Fuck carrying a big-ass machine gun from of the brightly colored box. "MISS ME, BITCH?"
"AHHHHHHG!" screamed Harry as he ran out of sight into the woods with Mr. Fuck in tow.
"BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! -hack cough-" Evien was cut off by a fit of coughing and ran off to get a glass of water, chugged it, and ran back.
Next was Loku. She revealed a present from behind her back and walked over to Kyuki who was laughing her ass off about Mr. Fuck killing Harry.
"Here ya go, pal!" said Loku cheerfully as she held out the present to her friend.
"Thanks, Loku!" replied Kyuki equally cheerful as she receieved the gift. She haphazardly ripped off the spork-printed paper and pulled out a brand new set of glistening Spork Shurikens.
"OMGZ! THANKS LOKU!" screeched Kyuki excitedly. "I needed a new set!"
"Yeah, I noticed your old pair was getting kind of blood-stained and bleh," said Loku.
Mimi stepped up to Loku and held out a small pink gift bag with tiny muffins printed on it. Loku eagerly snatched the bag away and ripped through the tissue paper.
"YAY! A MUFFIN!" cried Loku triumphantly as she clutched a simple muffin in her hands. "THANKS!"
Mimi shrugged, "Don't mention it."
Harry suddenly came staggering out of a nearby clump of bushes, bloody, bruised, and brutally beaten. He held out a lump wrapped in newspaper to Hermy.
"Er, thanks, Harry," said Hermy as she took the crap-ass gift. She swiftltly removed the wrapping and held up what was in the parcel; a rock.
Hermy gasped, "THIS IS PERFECT, HARRY!" She turned to her left and threw the rock at Ron's head.
"THATS FOR NOT GETTING ME A GIFT YOU BASTARD!" she screamed.
"Hey! I didn't pick you!" he retorted, rubbing his head in the spot where Hermy hit him.
"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! YOU COULD HAVE STILL GOTTEN ME SOMETHING!" Hermy shrieked back at him.
"...I love you!" said Ron as if these words could make up for it.
"FUCK YOU!" cried Hermy as she kicked him in the leg and ran away into the woods.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--aw whatever. Hey, it's my turn!" Ron said happily as he tossed a large bottle of hooch with a big, red bow tied around into Dr. Hobo's arms. "Merry fuckin' Christmas!"
"HOOOOOOCH!" exclaimed Dr. Hobo as he uncapped the bottled and chugged it all down.
Hermy came suddenly barreling out of the woods, dropped a present in Scotty's arms, then ran away back into the woods.
"Ooo...I wonder what it is!" wondered Scotty as she tore off the paper. Inside was a book titled, The Idiot's Guide to Not Being an Idiot Anymore! by Hermione G.
"Wow, this will be useful," said Scotty sarcastically as she deposited the book in a nearby fire.
Ginny quickly walked up to Mimi and gave her a present wrapped in shiny paper. "Ooo...shiny!" said Mimi all starry-eyed as she ripped into it. Beneath the wrapping was a cardboard box!
"SCORE! I got a box!" cheered Mimi.
"Uh, it's inside the box, dumbass," said Ginny.
"....OOOOOOH! OK!" Mimi said. She opened the box to find a grubby, ripped paper bag.
"EVEN BETTER!" said Mimi as she put the bag on top of her head. "Now we match!" she squealed, throwing an arm around Dr. Hobo, who happened to be up next.
Dr. Hobo lumbered over to Ginny and gave her a poorly wrapped box-shaped present. She wordlessly lifted the cover off the box and found nothing inside.
"Uh, there's nothing in here," said Ginny.
"Hu-DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH! Exactly! SUCKER!" replied Dr. Hobo as he zipped off into the woods.
"GET BACK HERE YOU DRUNK FUCKOFF!" screamed Ginny as she ran off into the woods.
Loku became way to lazy to write out anymore so she just got to the damn point.
Gir gave Lady Moofin an official Scary Monkey T-Shirt.
Lady Moofin gave Ron some laxatives for some odd reason.
Scotty gave GIR her life-long divotion (I know I spelled that wrong. e.e) which only lasted for 1.84 seconds.
"Now it's time for the Christmas Song!" cried Loku.
Everyone gathered together in a large group and began to sing a song. Whee.
"Deck the halls with sporks and other stuff
Fa la la la la la la la la
Tis' the season to be drunk
Fa la la la la la la la la
Don we now our gay apparell--"
They all donned really gay looking sweaters courtesy of Mrs. Weasley. "It doesn't get much gayer than this..." mumbled Ginny.
"FA LA LA LA LA LA LA
LA LA!
Give Loku muffins so she won't destroy us!
Fa la la la
la la la la la!
Some more stuff here that
doesn't rhyme!
Fa la la la la la la la la!
TAKE IT GINNY!"
The whole group turned and pointed at Ginny who was standing in the center of the crowd. She stood there and said nothing.
".....Fa la la la la la la la! YAY! MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!" shouted the entire group (yes, even Ginny).
"God bless us everyone!" squeaked Dr. Hobo in some weird little kid voice. Everyone turned to stare strangely at him. He flashed a smile and a thumbs up.
Wow. This took me FOREVER to write. Man, this was a long ass chapter! Good thing I didn't make it all one chapter. xD Ugh, I'm extremely tired right now. Anyway, guess what?! I got a new guitar for Christmas! YAY! It's SO AWESOME AND SHINY AND PINK! In fact, I might just have to mention it in the next chapter. ;D Continue reviewing and Happy Holidays from me and the cast of The Golden Spork!
