"I'm hungry, Mr. Frodo," Sam said, whining like usual.
"Well you ate most of Bill the Pony!" He was starting to get angry at Sam. So he slipped on the ring.
"What? You did it again! Whenever there is a problem you just slip on that accursed ring!" Sam accused while whining, because he is such a whiner weiner. "If you would just let someone else slip it on for a second you would see how annoying it is."
Frodo then reappeared, sitting on Boromir's lap. Boromir, though he could no longer see the road, thought nothing of it and stared ahead, like he had for the past 8 hours.
"No one shall touch my own, my precious!"
"See! You sound like that disagreeable Gollum fellow, that we eventually felt bad for and picked up again!" Sam accused. Gollum turned to face Frodo.
"He's right, you know, Precious. You do sound pretty stupid," Gollum said. Frodo suddenly grew angry and threw Gollum out the window again.
"Why did we go back and get him! He's annoying and we all voted! It was unanimous for Aragorn's sake! NO ONE LIKES HIM!" Frodo yelled.
Aragorn looked back. "Yeah, why did we go back? No, really. Why did we go back? That was stupid. It makes it sound like the author just wanted him in the story for five seconds so he could say something totally useless. He is the worst character ever." Everyone nodded in agreement. Frodo returned to his spot, rather unwillingly. He realized that it was for the better though, for they were driving in the ditch. It's not good to distract Boromir. Not good at all.
"You know, you are pretty annoying too, Mr. Frodo. Perhaps I should throw you out the window," Sam said.
"No, no. Then the story wouldn't work. I'm the main character. If you get rid of me, well, you end the story," Frodo said.
"Wait, I thought I was the main character," Aragorn, always having to be the center of attentions, said, his lip quivering.
"No. You are just there. No one really likes you either," Gimli said. Aragorn started to cry. Not one of those normal cries. Oh, no. He is beyond that. One of those ear-piercing, ground-splitting cries. Like a girl. A stupid fat blonde girl at rehab. Frodo throws him out the window.
"Why do you keep doing that? Now we have to go back for him!" Legolas said, shaking a sleeping hobbit off of his arm.
"Well, he has the memory of a goldfish. Perhaps he will forget what he is crying about and by the time we get back to him he'll have stopped," Frodo said, using that classic idiot logic. Everyone knows that Aragorn has the memory or a bumble bee. Not a goldfish. If Frodo had only waited a couple seconds, then he wouldn't have had to throw him out the window. When they found him Aragorn back, he was cradling his sword and giving it butterfly kisses. This disgusted them. Gimli even puked in his mouth a little, then swallowed it. Yes, they definitely voted the sword out of the van.
Well, thanx for reviewing. I haven't written in decades almost! I'll come up with more if it so suits me. Reviews always help!
Shadow's Echo
