The barn was cold. Even in the many layers of clothes I had on beneath my tight dress I could feel the chill. Need I mention the fact that corsets hurt. If I'd known they'd feel like this then I'd have insisted on not wearing one. But then that wouldn't be proper. Stupid rules.

"Jesse, there really isn't much I can tell you. Not that you'd believe anyway." I said impatiently.

We'd been at this for at least an hour. The others hadn't clicked on about us not coming on the walk. They hadn't even arrived back yet.

"How do you know I won't believe you if you don't tell me?" he asked running a hand through his dark hair. Which would -under normal circumstances- be his cue to kiss me. But I wasn't holding my breath. He seemed plenty annoyed that I wouldn't tell him I was lying. Plus the whole him not knowing me thing. I guess that got in the way a bit as well.

"Um, I think I'll take the risk." I told him.

"So you admit you were lying?" he insisted.

"No. Nothing like that. I just modified the truth slightly." I replied hastily.

"That means you lied." He explained.

"No. No it doesn't. Stop twisting everything I say."

"You said it Querida."

And that's when everything stopped. Had he just called me what I thought he'd called me? Because the deep state of shock I was in from hearing it may have been clouding my judgment. Which of course made no sense. But then again nothing makes sense out here.

"Susannah, are you sure you are alright?" he asked with concern. I smiled at him to hide some of my discomfort at the situation.

"If you stop questioning everything I say then I'll be fine." I told him calmly. He grinned. This of course wouldn't be proper if he was with any other young lady of his acquaintance. But for me he seemed to make an exception.

"I don't think so Querida." he said in amusement. I rolled my eyes. Okay, so maybe not the most lady-like thing to do. But whatever. He wasn't trying to be a gentleman so why should I care.

"Because if you don't I'll just tell Kathleen you've been bothering me. She'll have her parents chuck you out in no time." I informed him confidently.

I wasn't trying to be threatening. I really wasn't. But I also had to stop him blabbing about the fact I lied to everyone every five seconds. I couldn't risk having no where to stay. And I sure as hell couldn't risk leaving him. For a moment I let myself remember how much I loved him. I had deliberately locked that feeling away since the moment I arrived in this place. But now I felt the feeling come back in full force. I felt my insides tear at the knowledge I couldn't have him. Especially when he was looking at me like he was now. Like he was trying to figure out why I wasn't like Kathleen. Or Maria.

"Who are you?" he asked abruptly. Just like a century before when he asked me exactly the same question in my bedroom. Back when we first met. It was still just as important to him now as it was then. The difference being that I couldn't tell him the truth this time.

I tried desperately to hold in the wetness that was threatening to escape from my eyes. I knew that I was killing something. Not literally, but still. How could I ever make him fall in love with me in a week when all I could do was lie?

"I have to go." I said brokenly before turning to leave. Jesse caught my arm, but dropped it almost instantly as if it had begun to blister beneath his skin.

"Why can't you just answer the question?" he asked in confusion.

I could tell he was desperately trying to figure me out. I could feel him trying to search my eyes, but I refused to look up. I couldn't risk it.

"Look, just drop it will you?" I said, hearing the hysterical edge to my own voice. I had been so sure of myself earlier. And now look at me. Jesse had managed to throw me off balance with ten minutes of lousy questions. Okay, an hours worth, but the point is I shouldn't have acted so affected by it.

"No. I will not just 'drop it' as you put it. I know you are scared, but you can trust me." he told me softly. I was almost convinced. For a split second it was like the old Jesse again. Back when I first moved to Carmel. But it wasn't. I had to remember that.

"No I can't Jesse. Don't you get it? I can't. Because if I do then I'm dead. So kindly stop interrogating me."

He looked at me strangely then. And I admit, for a split second I thought that he'd suddenly remembered me. I was just about to say something when he cut me off.

"How did you know that?" he asked, confusedly. I stared at him.

"What?"

"You could me Jesse. No-one calls me that save a few close friends and family."

"Kathleen told me." I replied nervously. He shook his head in wonder.

"No she didn't. Everyone at this ranch calls me by my birth name." he said, reaching out and stroking back some of my hair. Society's rules obviously forgotten.

He looked down at me and a strange look passed over his face. Confusion and something stronger. I couldn't quite figure out what it was though. He reached out and to my surprise laid his other hand on my arm. And I was instantly lost. The way he looking at me, like he……I don't know. And I'll never know. Because at that exact moment Kathleen walked into the barn looking visibly annoyed. We sprang apart.

"Where on earth have you been? You gave us such a fright! We thought you had been abducted again!" she screeched.

Then noticing Jesse's presence she promptly shut up. Seriously, it was like Kelly Prescott reincarnated. Her hand immediately went to her braided hair. And I swear she pouted. I swear it. It was actually kind of pathetic. Considering the fact he was engaged to his cousin.

That was the only excuse I could give for my suddenly foul mood. I barged right past her catching her hand as I went and dragging her away. Only stopping for a split second to turn to an astonished looking Jesse to say:

"Good day to you Mr De Silva."

This was also a thing I couldn't have guessed just from Kathleen's introductions. But I decided to take advantage of my knowledge.

Maybe he'd figure it all out on his own.

A/N: hey people! Aw! You guys so rock!

I'm trying to take the whole 19th century thing slow. Sorry if it's boring. But I'm not just gonna make everything happen straight away. I wanna make it kind of believable. Lol.

But thanx for all the support guys!

Remember: Review and I will forever worship you!

Plus the more people review the sooner I can update! (I already have the next 2 chapters written out).

So yeah……look after your invisible smurfs and banana men!