A/N: Thanks again to everyone who reviewed! I'm used to getting, like, 6 reviews so this is a pleasant surprise! I apologize for the formatting problems. Thoughts should always be in italic and they are in the original document, but once the story is posted…some go AWOL. If anyone knows why it's happening, please let me know. I'm using Word X for Mac, with Safari as my browser.

Chapter 3 – Turn Luke On and Watch Him Simmer

Luke was in pain, and it wasn't the 'it feels so good it hurts' kind of pain. It was the pain a guy feels when the woman he's inexplicably attracted to uses him for her own selfish reasons. Save the few seconds when his lips had been fused with hers, there was nothing even remotely good about this situation. He had entertained fantasies from time to time about what it would be like to kiss Lorelai Gilmore; in none of those had this been the way it happened. In his favorite recurring vision, she pulled back and looked at him from behind demurely lowered lashed and moved in to initiate the second kiss, which led straight to…well, not this.

Because now that he could focus, kind of, he saw her looking at him with a half fearful, half pleading look. He was torn between desire and obligation. In the first case, he would yell at her for upsetting the careful balance of their relationship by making out with him in an attempt to save face in front of another man. He would yell until all the pent-up frustration caused by one little kiss coupled with five years of desire was spent, he would order out all the gawking customers and drag her upstairs to build up and release some frustration of a…different kind.

In the second case, he would go along with whatever she said and then, after he had sufficiently calmed down, he would listen to her excuses and apologies and half-heartedly agree that, no, it should never happen again.

In the split second it took for those thoughts to run through his head, he knew that his decision was already made. His fate had been sealed from the moment he had seen Christopher approach the counter and Lorelai had lunged at him to avoid another ugly confrontation. He knew that, no matter what he was feeling at the moment and the consequences of what had happened, he couldn't make Lorelai look more like a fool in front of the man who had humiliated her in front of the whole diner crowd a mere thirty minutes ago.

Behind Lorelai, Christopher cleared his throat. "Uhm, sorry to interrupt…"

Lorelai slowly released the grip she still had on his shirt. She was still staring at him, her eyes moving rapidly over his face, trying to gauge how he would react. She unconsciously licked her lips, stirring pools of lust in Luke's stomach. He almost groaned aloud at that, but caught himself in time. He lifted his chin in a gesture meant to snap her out of her trance.

She spun around quickly then, breaking eye contact with him in order to face Christopher. "Chris! How long have you been standing there?" She gave a nervous little laugh and pushed her hair behind her ears.

"Long enough. Who's this?" Christopher asked as he gave Luke a not-so-subtle once over. "Funny, in all the conversations we've engaged in since yesterday, you never mentioned you had a…special friend."

Luke clenched his fists behind the counter and gritted his teeth. He hadn't liked the way Christopher had looked at him and didn't like the tone he was taking with Lorelai. It almost sounded as if he were baiting her. He forced himself to take a deep breath. He was, after all, an unwilling participant in this whole charade; he wouldn't cause a scene, but he wouldn't help her out either.

Damn, who was he kidding?

He shoved his hands in the back pockets of his jeans and rocked back on his heels. "Lorelai and I have been seeing each other for what, three weeks now?" From the corner of his eye he saw Lorelai relax a little and give a subtle nod. "We've been keeping it real quiet, 'cause you know how people love to talk in a small town." He paused to jut out his chin to include the silent diner crowd in his speech. "I don't even think Lorelai has told Rory yet, right babe?"

"Uh, no. I don't want her to get her hopes up, not after my amazing reenactment of Runaway Bride. What are you doing here? I thought your huffy exit would be the last I'd see of you for awhile." With that, Lorelai crossed her arms and glared at Chris.

"Yeah, well I…" Christopher trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck and looking everywhere but at them. Obviously feeling uncomfortable beneath the stares of the silent diner patrons, he dragged his eyes up to Lorelai's, looking so miserable that Luke almost lost his composure and let out an undignified snort. He almost lost it again a second later when Christopher leaned forward and grabbed Lorelai's arm hard enough to make her flinch. "Look, Lore, could we maybe go somewhere private to discuss this? I'm, uh, not really comfortable with the way everyone is staring at me."

Lorelai jerked her arm free. "Well boo-hoo, Chris! You certainly didn't mind being the center of attention when you were yelling at me earlier! What the hell is wrong with you? One second you're all normal and the next you're the Incredible Hulk, which was totally unappreciated by the way."

Christopher looked beseechingly into her eyes and dropped his voice to a whisper. Luke had to lean forward over the counter to catch what he was saying. "…seeing you calm and, for lack of a better word, content, telling me you're over me? There's nothing I wanted to hear less. I don't want you to be over me, hell I still want you under me –"

"ARGH!" Lorelai interrupted him with her scream. "Chris, you are so messed up right now you're making Anna Nicole look like Hillary." She leaned forward and jabbed a finger into his chest. "You have a great girlfriend who obviously adores you. How could you do this to Sherry? And me, how could you do this to me? I'm happy; I've moved on, life is good. I don't need you messing it up again. And another thing," Lorelai's head whipped around to face Luke at the sound of him clearing his throat. "I'm in a relationship too now. You therefore have NO RIGHT to say what you just did."

Lorelai placed her hands on her hips and assumed a no-nonsense pose. "That's why I'm going to ask you once, only once, to get out of here."

"But – " Christopher started to protest.

"Once, Chris. The second time you're asked to leave, it will be accompanied by Luke physically removing you from the premises. Got it? We share a daughter, that I can live with, but if you ever do this to me again, you won't get off so nicely." Lorelai had advanced on Christopher as she spoke. They were at the door of the diner, her glaring at him and him looking like he wanted to risk the combined wrath of Lorelai and Luke to get another word in. Luke quickly moved from behind the counter to make good on Lorelai's promise. Christopher saw him and fumbled with the door before rushing out onto street.

For all of five seconds, the only sounds in the diner were those of Lorelai's deep breaths and the ticking of the clock. Luke stood still as the adrenaline from the encounter with Christopher wore off and his anger came rushing back. He opened his mouth to confront Lorelai and then quickly shut it when he realized that no one had spoken yet.

And then all hell broke loose.

Everyone and their dining companion started talking at once. The shock of going from near-silence to overwhelming noise caught Luke unprepared. Never good in social situations, he felt his temper rise from a worrisome but manageable 6 to a scary 9. He wanted nothing more than to escape to the sanctity of his apartment to wrap his mind around what he would say to Lorelai before the wall of noise surrounding him caused him to hit 10 and make him do something he'd regret.

Lorelai turned to him, her eyes big and blue. "Luke, I don't know what came over me…"

Kirk (when did he get here, Luke wondered absently) raised his hand and spoke loudly enough to be heard over the din. "Luke, I need more coffee. And a clean fork, this one touched the knife…"

Miss Patty came rushing over and draped an arm around Lorelai. "Lorelai, honey, I didn't know you'd bagged Gorgeous over there. You naughty, naughty girl you. So, tell me…"

"Hey, Luke! You just gonna stand there, or are gonna take my order?" Someone yelled from the back of the room.

"I was here first! I'm starving! Luke, I want…" Bootsy, who had been sitting at the counter, therefore enjoying a front-row seat of the entanglement, began to whine.

"ENOUGH!" Luke bellowed, interrupting Bootsy and not giving a rat's ass. Everyone turned to stare at him. "The show's over! If you're done eating, pay and get out. If you're still eating, hurry up, pay and get out. If you haven't ordered yet, I hear Al's Pancake World is holding its salute to breakfast foods of the world. I highly recommend it. Now GET OUT!" With that, he turned and headed in the direction of the kitchen, intending to tell Cesar he was in charge. He had to get out of here.

"Luke, wait," he felt Lorelai's hand on his arm and whipped around to face her, making her jump back.

"Lorelai, I am in no mood to talk to you right now. I don't want to hear your reasons for dragging me into your little domestic dispute. I don't want to hear your explanations for why you just humiliated me in front of everyone. I don't want to listen to your babbling, your apologies or whatever else you have to say to me. I'm going upstairs. To be alone!" He punctuated his last word by crashing his fist onto the counter, making her wince.

"Um, ok. Well, call me when you're ready to…discuss this. I'll have thought of tons of reasons why you shouldn't hate me by then. So, um," Lorelai got that glint in her eye that she always did before saying something naughty, "enjoy your cold shower."

"OUT, now!"

Lorelai rushed to grab her purse and coat from the table. "Ok, too soon for jokes, I get it." She opened the door and looked over her shoulder at him. "I'll be at home. Come see me when you're ready. I'm really sorry about this, about everything." And with that, she was gone.

Luke stared out the window at her retreating back for a moment before moving aside to let the exiting customers leave. Fuck this, he thought. He walked to the kitchen and poked his head in. "Kitchen's closed, Cesar. Come to the counter and make everyone pay, then lock up and leave. I'll take care of the clean up later."

"Sure thing, boss."

And Luke headed up the stairs to his apartment, thankful that Jess was out. He needed to clear his head.