A/N: Sorry that it has been SO LONG since I've updated. I'm in the school play, and we've had practices LIKE CRAZY throughout the month of February. Gosh, that month has been SO STRESSFUL this year! I'll probably be updating a lot more often in March and April. This chapter was written mostly at night, when I was tired, so there will probably be a lot of grammar mistakes and non-descriptive content and stuff, and just letting you know, I'm always open to constructive criticism. Also, congratulations to Morgan Scarlett or Mneme for being my very first reviewer! Thanks for your feedback! Answering some of her questions, most of the Arthurian legend in this story comes from these books: The Sword and the Circle by Rosemary Sutcliff, King Arthur and His Knights of the Round Table by Roger Lancelyn Green, and of course, The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. As for characters, ONE new one appears in this chapter, but you will see more by chapter 3 or so. And, in my story, Lancelot is younger than Arthur, while Bradley says he is older. So don't be surprised if it says the Lancelot/Morgaine affair happens when he is 14.
I don't own anything except Mirouaene and Pamina and my ideas in this first chapter, but I am so happy to be using Bradley's wonderful characters as part of my story!
Chapter 1: In My Own World
"The huge creature scratched the air with its pointed talons, as it lunged towards Almea. Shain, out of instinct, plunged from the tree in a sudden flash of madness. He rushed towards the creature, drawing his sword…"
I smiled silently as a shy tingling rose along my skin. I absolutely adored these parts of stories, where the first hint of romance was always given…mutual respect. This was the fifth time that I had begged the minstrel to tell me the tale of the adventures of Shain of the Far East. I often marveled at the beautiful language the minstrel used to illustrate the plot, so much that I would fall in love with the characters sometimes, as I had many times with Shain. I twirled a long ribbon on my skirt and sat in a thoughtful daze, suddenly wondering where I had come from, how long I had been at this court. I had never known a mother or a father except for him to who I was given for fostering. My elder foster-brother, Lancelot, had told me that I had been born out of fire, at a festival called Beltane, or something like that, in a land of wise, powerful people. However, all that I remembered of my life was dwelling in the small kingdom of Lower Britain, in the abode of King Ban. I had become used to being surrounded by people, especially adolescent boys, wherever I was. However much power I held by being the King's foster-daughter, I could not utilize it on a soul at court. I was silent as a cool, enchanting wind, and did not befriend many, save for my kind, perceptive brothers. The majority of the young maidens at court had been fathered by the King with waiting-women, so they often kept to themselves and could care less for a quiet princess who could function only when deep in thought. One or two I could speak to, but these were the only couple with whom I could entrust my strange feelings and thoughts.
It had been some time after my ninth summer when the minstrel first arrived at court. I would listen intently as I sat near my brothers, while the vibrant warmth of the hearth covered me like a down-filled blanket. Ever since that first night, I had established clever ways to make enough time to request one piece after another from the minstrel. After some time, however, visions had begun to spring inside my sharp mind, and I could all of a sudden create the outcomes of lives as if they were deeper stories based on the works of the minstrel. I have lived a year now with these strange hallucinations, and still I question whether my love of legend and adventure has driven me insane.
"Lancelot will one day venture into that land…the land of the heathen pixies and faeries that he told me about! He is destined to embark on numerous journeys all over our realm. I can clearly see it now, he will solve the mysteries of our land! I can now envision him being put under a spell by a sorceress from the chapel of the dead! Whatever good he does to people will be in vain however, when he finds his one true love sitting by the side of his best friend, as queen—"
"Mirouaene, I am becoming quite concerned about your place in this court. It is no joke anymore, you are beginning to sound like a mad prophetess." Pamina let the words fall sharply from her mouth like ice crystals. The girl held a somewhat snobbish look on her usually innocent, delicate face.
"But I can picture it all, clearly indeed. My brother has a prosperous future! I can even imagine the lady who will be the queen of the land when Lancelot is grown. Tall and slim, with golden hair like threads from the sun—"
"And you act like a stateswoman, saying that Lancelot will fall in love with this lady. Well, it suits him well, he who has so little honor that he thinks he can court every girl under the sun at this age itself! Soon he will be—"
"Don't you dare speak of my brother that way! And who are you to be concerned of my place in court? I am princess here, and you are only—only—" A surge of tears began to rush into the back of my eyes. I made a great effort trying to lock them in that position, while remembering that even I was not a princess of blood kin to King Ban.
"Dear, you know perfectly well that your brother has already left for the pixie-land, and it is no adventure to him. It is home to his mother, though I would not expect him to return. Who knows what those filthy people have in mind? I can guarantee that his mother will not even remember the son she gave birth to and dispose of him as quickly as possible."
"He may not have found it an adventure to approach the land, but I know he will find adventure there eventually. He is only 14, he can't possibly be on an expedition as yet!" I daintily brushed a stray tear from my cheek.
"Mirouaene dear, you must be crazy. All this talk of sorceresses, quests, mysteries…why I believe you know nothing of the so-called "mysteries of the land" yourself!"
"It may sound outlandish, but it is the truth. Nobody must defy the truth." I spoke with confidence this time.
"How can you call a "new queen" truth? First of all, our reigning queen Igraine is Lancelot's aunt. It would be a terrible sin to fall in love with her. Secondly, Igraine is as young and healthy as ever. You will most likely be a mother by the time we are in need of a new queen."
"Uther will not live much longer. He has fought many wars and will soon die of his wounds. He has a son who will most likely take his place—"
"Bah! You think you can predict the future and everything. You think you are so smart. You might be princess, but I am sure that even one of us, though we are daughters of serving-women, would be a great deal wiser than you. If you ever took the throne, I can guarantee that you would cause enough havoc to destroy all of our land, with all your craziness!" Pamina shot a glaring look at me and, flicking her long, golden hair, rushed off with another girl, giggling as she sent one more sneer my way.
I defiantly rushed behind a pillar and began to weep. Torrents of warm tears rushed down my curved face. No, Mirouaene, you must not be so sensitive, I thought to myself, but I could not hold back my pain. I was a proud girl, and I never liked to be in the wrong. But I was not in the wrong! My visions were correct, I was certain that they were true. They ran around my mind as clearly as if I was observing the actions right now. Stupid Pamina. All she cares about is pomp, grandeur, and attention. She will never experience truth and happiness. I smiled wickedly. Something should go wrong for that girl. She deserves all the misery that she has given me. I must have been as dumb as a rock to have made a friend of her. I hung my head slightly. She had been the only person who I had shared my thoughts and dreams with for over a year. And all she had done for me was to think me mad. I sighed heavily. I could not hold these apparitions within me. I knew they meant something, I just knew it. Who would I trust? I could not possibly tell father, and Balan and Balyn were away fighting the Saxons. Lancelot was in the faery-land according to Pamina. I held my head in my hands as I began the long walk up to my chambers. A housemaid offered to escort me, but I bluntly refused. I had always wanted to grow up to be a strong, independent princess, so I decided to prepare myself. I grinned widely. I felt much better now. Someday my visions would aid and guide me. Someday my intelligence would lead me far. But how could I be so confident when nobody knew or recognized my abilities?
Three Months Later
I stretched my long legs out as I leaned my head back against the cool, hard tub of water where I washed myself. I smiled as an adept hand began to smother my rich, dark hair with sweet-smelling herbal liquids from the mountains. I had often gone through this process by myself, because I needed my privacy, but on this day I was too lightheaded and cheerful to care. Word had gone around the castle that our dear Lancelot was arriving home today after being away for about a year now. I shivered out of sheer happiness. My dear brother, the audacious lad who would keep me educated in the ways of the world, and who would answer my endless questions patiently without a single snap or a scornful expression. He would come home looking more grown-up to me than ever. I looked up and asked the maid to scrub me as quickly as she could. When she had finished, I tied up my hair in a tight plait and hurriedly dried myself down. I called for my fancy blue holiday dress, and swiftly knotted the sea-blue ribbons. Then, I ran through the corridors, skipping three steps at a time as I sped down the many staircases towards the grand hall, where guests and returning inhabitants of the castle were brought in to settle down and speak with the king, queen, and courtiers. Just then, I heard a harmony of voices, and I knew he had arrived. I fell in among the throng of the waiting-women's daughters, trying to look as dignified as any princess, but feeling as light as a feather deep inside my heart of hearts. I looked up in time to see my brother enter, tall and glorious, like any proud youth. I smiled shyly. He had grown handsome since I saw him last. Unaware of my manners, I rushed to where he stood, holding my arms out toward him. I would tell him of all the visions I had been having. I would relate to him all the wonderful stories the minstrel had told me. "Lance! Oh, how I've missed you!" I cried in delight as I ran to him. Just then I was jostled and pushed to the floor, and I heard voices around me stirring the tense air. I grunted as I struggled off the floor. I was princess, did no one comprehend that? And Lancelot was my own kin! Maybe not by blood, but I surely loved him as much as I would a blood brother! In a moment of confusion I found myself once again on the hard ground. I looked up to my brother for assistance, but he just began walking towards father and did not even glance at me. I frowned. His arrogance has sure grown along with his body. As I once again made an effort to find a comfortable stance. I felt the sharp grasp of a hand across my shoulders. A small female who was about my height raised me, smoothed my dress, and smiled. I stared into her deep, dark eyes. It seemed that I could pick out the mysteries in those dark thickets of knowledge. I could separate the good and the bad in this woman, or girl, as a swan separates milk and water, just by gazing into those mystifying eyes. I forced a smile back at her. I knew I could trust this person, though I knew her not.
"Oh dear, you must be disheveled! Let me tidy you up a bit." The female finally spoke. I could now definitely take her for a lady, though she was not much taller than I. Her voice was slightly deep with an imposing tone, but still soft and thick like honey.
I suddenly realized, however kind this lady might seem, I did not even have an idea of who she was. "Are—are you from court?" I asked in a timid voice, backing away with miniscule steps.
"Why, of course not! You would have surely recognized me otherwise. I know you for a princess of these areas. How is it with you, Mirouaene?" She reached to rest a small hand with long, sharp nails on my shoulder, but I immediately stepped back and stifled a scream, which came out as no more than a squeak.
"How is it that you know my name?" I managed to whisper. "Who—who are you? What is your name?"
"Oh you poor thing, I had no intention to scare the life out of you. I only know who you are because I know of your fate. You have a position of glory waiting in your midst, my dear. I can see it clearly." I gasped out of wonder. The exact same phrase I had always used when speaking of my visions had uttered out of this strange woman's mouth. I shook my head, sure that I had not heard correct. I was probably in a daze as always, with the excitement.
"You—you can predict what is in store for other beings?" I smiled, a fountain of joy and delight shooting out of my heart. "How very interesting! So then, what is your name? I want to know who you are, and where you come from."
"I am Morgaine, my dear, honorable priestess of Avalon." She said as she stood up straight, and suddenly looked as tall and imposing as a proud peacock. "You might know me as your cousin, and close kin."
"What is Avalon?" I pondered. "I have never heard of such a place or object." Suddenly, a frightening thought bit me like a mosquito on a day of stagnant heat. "Is Avalon the land of the heathen faeries? Oh please say no, and if it is, please do not hurt me! Whatever have I done to harm you?" I began to weep softly.
"Oh, don't be ridiculous, the very thought! Avalon is a land of wise, learned people who practice magic healing arts of all sorts. I must say also, that you yourself come from Avalon, and I understand that you have the skill of a priestess."
"What skill? By all I know, I can do nothing but fall into daydreams. All the young girls at court call me crazy and never speak to me because of my lack of talent." I wept more as I let out my feelings.
"Oh dear, just as I thought it would turn out. You have learned nothing of self-confidence while you lived here. First things first, I would like to rid your mind of self-pity. Whenever did you learn such a thing, you who is capable of so much?"
"Did I not just tell you? Everybody around here dislikes me but my brothers, though I am princess. And now even Lancelot is acting different."
"Bah! Forget that man! Breaks a promise right after saying he will keep it. You can never trust men like that." Morgaine looked thoughtful as I raised an eyebrow, confused. "It is a long story. I promise I will tell you later. However, why do you say that these girls dislike you so much? I believe you are exaggerating, for if there is anything distasteful about you, I surely cannot see it, with all my powers."
"You see, I have what are called visions, hallucinations. During the day I will ask the minstrel to recite me a ballad, and that night I will suddenly have the ability to see somebody's future, especially that of my brothers." I spoke with excitement, as I retold what I had seen about the future of the kingdom of Logres.
"Why, that is more than I can ask of any of the maidens residing here! Visions are perfectly normal for a priestess of Avalon. These visions form a power called the Sight." I squealed delightfully, happy to know that I had a power while Pamina and others did not. "But—" Morgaine suddenly sounded stricter, and her voice was icy. "You must not put your power to bad use, for it will lead to trouble eventually."
"I cannot wait to tell the others! Pamina will be so shocked and will finally look up to me!"
"My dear, that is exactly what I was explaining to you just now. As priestesses, we must keep every expression of ours secret to the outside world. We can share them among ourselves, but nobody of a belief outside that of the Druids must know of our powers." I began to look around, being sure everybody was preoccupied with what they were doing and had not heard our conversation.
"So what do you have in mind that I should do?" I inquired.
"Why, come with me to Avalon, of course! Your type is not meant to stay in this worthless place, especially with your brother Lancelot. I am sure you have envisioned him up to no good in future years, am I not correct?"
"Well, yes actually, though I can never imagine him committing such treason." My body welled up with excitement as I thought of leaving Benwick forever for a new home in Avalon. "We must inform father before we set off, though." I said quickly.
"Oh no, I shall set standards with him later. Right now, you have much to learn and that is all I care for." She then grabbed me by the arm as we slinked through the throng of people. I giggled joyfully. Our minds were set towards our destination, Avalon.
