The next day went by without much of anything happening. Some very nice and long ceremonies were held to conmemorate the dead humans. Kaia had attended, but had not looked happy about it. Stari had graciously avoided the funerals, Vozem and Malinki had hidden in the caves, Iablaka had run into the forest with Alma and Koshka and all four members of SG-1 were excused by Chilaviek himself. Kaia had most defenately not been happy about it. It was after midday that she came back, hungry and half asleep. She was complaining.
"I do not understand. Why must death be so.....depressing for humans? Can they not see it is better to be dead than dying and bury the corpses and be done with it?" She looked over at SG-1, Daniel tried to explain how death was painfull because it meant parting with a loved one but Kaia would hear none of it, she waved Daniel silent, "I am hungry and I do not wish to be depressed anymore. Today we all celebrate! Should I be the only Padeos not to because of human costums?" With that she took some food and stormed off, to find Vozem and threaten his life. He was supposed to have come with her.
That was basically the high light of the day, so the next ten hours before sunset, SG-1 found themselves in a very unique position: they were bored stiff. No one wanted to hear the story of how the Padeos had come to be one more time, none of them wanted to be tested on their newfound abilities as Padeos and they didn´t know how to make themselves usefull. Boring was practically the only word that could describe their situation at that moment. However, everything ends, and finally, the sun set. Kaia came to look for them, with a very apologetic Vozem trailing after her. She ignored Vozem, and asked SG-1 to go back inside and change clothes. Vozem went ahead with them, Kaia stopped Sam.
"How are you feeling?"
Sam didn´t want to talk about that. She felt fine, and it wasn´t a lie, she really did feel fine, as if nothing had happened. Her arm was no longer numb and nothing hurt, she wasn´t even wearing a sling, and the bandage had been removed that morning. There had been nothing under the cloth wrappings, only a small mark, as if she´d scraped her skin, not had a knife in her, "I´m fine."
"That is to be expected. How do you feel about your change? About the Padeos?"
Another topic worth avoiding, "It´s strange."
"I am trying to make conversation, Sam, I can see it all in your head."
Why is it people always want to ask what they already know?, "Then why do you ask?"
"You have so many emotions in your head.....I would simply like to know the truth."
The truth isn´t that simple, "Well, it´s strange I never thought it possible to be like this."
"Jack thinks it .....and somehow inappropiate, he thinks it is not right to be changing your body chemistry like this."
Sam was shocked, she really doubted that´s what O´Neill actually thought, "Well you would know."
"Yes I would. I do. It is not as if I can avoid it, you work so hard to keep most things from the people around you. You do not trust us."
Something that wasn´t quite correct, "We barely know you, we´re just.....cautious."
"I do not mean us as strangers from another planet. You do not trust anybody. There is not a single person you know who actually understands you, who knows all you know and all you feel."
If you get techinical, no one really knows anyone, ever, "Things are just different were we come from."
"I know. You do not feel comfortable here. You do not understand us, even if you are one of us."
Not exactly one of them, "Things are just.....different."
"You do not have to be polite. I know your true feelings. You are confused and you also feel-"
Is she ever wrong?, "Confused doesn´t quite cover it."
"You dislike some of our costums even. Our clothes. Our way of fighting. Our beliefs in somethings and our distaste for.....science."
It wasn´t exactly a dislike, "It´s not you Kaia. Everything here is just.....different."
Kaia smiled and started walking towards the cave. Sam didn´t know what else to do, so she followed the girl. Kaia didn´t keep quiet for long, "You are nervous." Sam didn´t say anything. The girl was right, what point was there in confirming it?, "Your teamates do not think any less of you, no matter what you do."
Sam stopped. She was now, for sure, confused. She had absolutely no idea what Kaia was talking about. The girl stopped too, and lowered her voice. They were at the very entrance to the cave, "In your planet, great importance is placed on whether you are a man or a woman. You are seen different. You, Sam, are different."
Sam knew that! She really didn´t need to hear it from this girl. She tried to keep her eyes from rolling. Kaia simply went on, "I can only know what it is like, but I cannot understand it. In any case, as long as you are here you will not be judged."
Sam thought it was all vaguely familiar, more than one person has given her that speech before, but she didn´t really care at the moment. She still had no idea what Kaia was trying to say. Kaia smiled, yet again.
"It is curious. You do not know what your mind is thinking. It would be fascinating but, I feel this is not the time," For once, Sam agreed with Kaia, "In the very back of your mind, you are worried about many things, but one of them, is not having your uniforms. They make you the same as everyone else, you do not feel you are out of place. Whenever you are home, you do not feel the need to be the same as the others, you are not at work, you do not need to prove yourself. You are here, you are working and.....you are made to stand out from the rest of your group."
Sam really couldn´t believe what she was hearing. This girl actually thought that she was worried about clothes! It was ridiculous, and it was untrue. She had nothing to worry about, there was no problem. They were stranded and trying to blend in with the locals, no one on SG-1 had a choice, not even Teal´c. They all had to do certain things, including, wearing the clothes the locals provided for them. Kaia said no more, simply looked at her. Sam stared right back. Finally, Kaia shrugged and went inside. Sam followed her, this time she didn´t bother to hide the fact that she was rolling her eyes. Inside, everyone had changed. They all had clean shirts and pants, it was almost as if nothing had happened. Sam had a strange moment were she actually felt comforted by seeing those clothes. She shook the thought away, with every hour that passed it got more and more difficult to tell which thoughts and opinions were her own and which were not. She looked at her team. Teal´c looked, as ever, almost blank. Sam caught a glimpse of amusement at something, probably O´Neill, who was standing in the middle of the room, looking awkward, as if he had nothing to do. Daniel was sitting down, but wearing pretty much the same expresion on his face. Sam smiled at them and would of joined them, but something was handed out to her. It was Kaia, she´d pulled some clean clothes from a shelf. She signaled for Sam to follow her, and so, Sam did.
Kaia washed up rather quickly and when she came out into the room she could have been another person. The shoes were gone, and so were the pants and long sleeve shirt. In their place, there was a rather short skirt with a rather short shirt to match. O´Neill stared at her, wondering why it was that everytime they celebrated something, this girl seemed to loose more clothes. His whole mind turned blank when he realized he´d seen Kaia give the exact same clothes to Sam, maybe in a different shade of green, but it didn´t matter: O´Neill really doubted he would notice the shade of green. Whatever blank his mind drew kept him pretty busy, because he didn´t actually notice his 2IC until Vozem touched his arm and told him to get up. Sam was already outside and, just as he´d predicted, O´Neill didn´t notice the exact shade of green she was wearing. The moment was short-lived, and before he could get his foot in his mouth, they were told they now had to climb up a mountain, carrying several heavy-looking crates.
The celebration took place on top of the mountain, which was a lake, which was dried up because it wasn´t raining season, which SG-1 didn't really care about. All they heard, was the part about the climbing with heavy boxes. They tried to negotiate their way out of this chore, but it seemed they had misunderstood Kaia when she´d spoken to them. Carrying the crates wasn´t a request, it was an order. It didn't matter how she got them to do it, just that she did.
Fortunately, it wasn´t really so bad. The crates looked heavier than what they really were and the climbing was more like walking up a path. It also wasn´t very far. They got to the top in about fifteen minutes. The sight there was amazing: in the very center, a huge bonfire, the biggest controlled fire any of them had evern seen; the ground, they soon discovered, was made up entirely of nicely rounded light grey stones; almost near enough to get burned to a crisp and in a perfectly round circle, was the food and drink; a few meters farther away, there were several people gathering. They all dropped the crates next to all the other crates and walked towards the people. Kaia seemed thrilled, she´d even forgiven Vozem. Stari, Malinki and Iablaka soon arrived, all of them carrying glasses filled with something. They handed everyone a glass. Iablaka even bowed to SG-1.
"You have proven yourselves. I apologize for my behavior, earlier."
O´Neill took the glass from the girl, suspiciously. It only took him a moment to realize the girl was actually already drunk. He was wondering what kind of celebration this was, he absent mindedly took a sip from his drink. As soon as he swallowed, he realized why the girl had to be drunk. He might as well have of licked one of those alcohol-swabs Dr. Fraser liked so much! He coughed, getting everyone around him to laugh (except Sam, who seemed to have done the exact same thing at the exact same moment and she was busy choking as well). Stari straightened him up and smiled, a big drunken smile.
"You wondered about the purpose of the celebration? We are here because we won a great battle and defeated out enemy. When you assume a greater part of the celebration includes drinking, you are correct."
O´Neill breathed in well enough to ask a question, "Don´t you folks worry about the hangover tomorrow?"
Stari didn´t understand, so Daniel stepped in and quickly described to him what happened to humans if they had to much to drink. Stari laughed, "You are Padeos! Forget this. We are never ill, tomorrow, it will be as if you had slept the entire night. Drink!" Before walking away to get some more drinks, he practically forced Daniel his own drink. After getting the archeologist to choke for a while, he laughed one more time and left. All of SG-1 felt like outsiders, but there was something about the whole celebration, it was like a voice, it was hard to resist. The mental debate stopped for a second as they noticed Teal´c had no drink, they were just about to ask him why it was he´d been left alone when Malinki spoke up. It was strange, because they rarely heard the boy.
"Jaffa do not drink. It is true here and it is true for Teal´c. You, however, are not Jaffa, for this one night, you may forget were you come from. You are Padeos. Celebrate. Tomorrow, you go home, you go back to your planet and back to being humans."
The boy too, was already starting to get drunk. Kaia quickly explained that they were, in fact, several hours late. It wasn´t long before she too walked away, in search of food and drink. Meanwhile, the voice inside Daniel, Sam and O´Neill kept getting louder and louder. They couldn´t get Malinki´s words out of their heads. The boy did have a point. It all seemed pretty harmless and, in any case, they were all responsible adults, it wasn´t as if they´d never had a drink in their entire lives. For a brief second, all three of them realized how much they had changed, they really didn´t care much for whatever rules they had followed in the past. This line of thinking was interrupted though, because Kaia came back with Stari, with more drinks and plenty of food. It wasn´t long before all of their minds were far away from a little voice, the voice that told them to be civil, to remember the SGC, the rules, to be humans from Earth.
The celebration dragged on through the night. Somewhere around what SG-1 imgained had to be midnight, they were surprised as someone came up to mountain towards them. It was Laska and to the inmense surprise of Teal´c, there were three Jaffa after him. This ocassion won two raised eyebrows and a –What in the hell...- from O´Neill. Laska apologized for being so late, and introduced Teal´c to the Jaffa. Apparently, he´d traveled for an entire day just to bring them here, "They also have a right to meet one of their own who came through the Stardoor." The Jaffa were suspicious and looked every which way, half expecting some unknown enemy to jump out. It took a while, but finally, Teal´c managed to calm them down. They spoke a dialiect of Goa´uld but it was not so different from one Teal´c knew so, after a while, they were actually deep in conversation. O´Neill started thinking at that point that maybe he had been drinking a little too freely, he never thought he´d see four Jaffa smiling at the same time. Daniel was fascinated by the whole exchange, and kept staring at them, throwing questions and comment in the air such as, "Who do you think they served originally?"; "Do you think they actually carry symbionts? Maybe they found someway to breed them....."; "Can you imagine the shock? They were here, alone for all they knew, and suddenly, they find that one like them came here."; "What do you suppose they think about the Goa´uld? You suppose they still think their gods?". Daniel rambled on, and finally, it was Malinki and Laska who took pity on him and actually started a conversation. Meanwhile, Sam had loosened up somewhat and was actually trying to explain quantum physics to Kaia, while Kaia tried to explain how it was Bolshoi´s soul had come to rest within her. O´Neill, had he been sober, would of gotten a headache. Both women were off, blabbing and arguing. O´Neill was actually quite fascinated with all that was going on around him, he always wondered what it was exactly the rest of his team had that made them so.....friendly, they could just pick a topic and actually have a conversation with someone about it. O´Neill wasn´t good at being politically correct so he mostly stuck to sarcasm and silence, which worked for him. His musings were interrupted by Vozem, who came up behind Kaia and picked her up, dragging her away for something. Sam stared at the whole event and O´Neill was surprised when she actually broke a smile. He stared at her, confused not so much at what had just happened, but at the fact that Sam found it amusing. She finally noticed him and looked down at her drink, trying to put the smile away. O´Neill just had to know what was going on.
"What´s so funny?" He swallowed, hard, when he noticed he slurred the words a little. Just how much had he had to drink so far?
"I just.....don´t know." That was a surprise! Apparently, a drunken Sam did not hold the answers to life and the universe. Something moved inside O´Neill, he should do something at that moment.....what was it? He should get his team out of there! It was not healthy for them to be drinking so much, they were employees and officers of the USAF not sixteen-year olds!.....No, that wasn´t it. That would be no fun. O´Neill took a sip from his drink and it all became clear to him.....he liked this, he felt good, as if he was free and he was still very curious about Sam not having an answer to a simple question. Yes! That was it! This was a celebration, he should blend in with the locals.....Hell!, he thought, He was one of the locals. With that not-so-logical-conversation in his head being over, the little voice of USAF and regulations´ last fight was over, it had lost. It was gone. Silent. O´Neill skooted over so he was closer to Sam, who was still smiling. He stared at her and finally, she gave in.
"Fine.....I do know! I just.....I don´t know....." She trailed off, taking another drink.
O´Neill was more than a little curious by now, "OK so......what just happened?"
"I think it´s some sort of.....game, I think....." Sam looked down at her feet, concentrating, "It´s a game they play when they´re all drunk."
"OK that makes.....sense."
"It does! They don´t play it sober ´cause it´s.....it had to do with hand-eye coordination and.....betting, they bet something!.....They can´t play it sober ´cause then there would be no point."
This made no sense to O´Neill, until he looked Sam in the eye and he suddenly had all the answers. Palanka. The game was called Palanka. It was played by four or five people. Two had to juggle six cubes filled with shells of some sort back and forth between themselves, two others had to do something in the middle of it all.....some sort of dance or something. When there was a fifth person, he or she had to throw an extra seventh cube to the jugglers randomly. There were three kinds of bets: on the jugglers, the dancers and the fifth man. You could bet how many tosses it would take them to drop a ball and which ball it would be, they were all different colors. You could also bet on who would drop it or if it would be one of the dancers who would send it flying off. The dancers had to actually complete a certain number of steps, without being hit by a cube, so you bet on which cube would hit them, when, where and who it would hit. The fifth guy was hardly ever bet on because all you had to bet on was when he´d throw which color cube at what juggler. This game made no sense to O´Neill, there was no way anyone could place a bet on all those things, it was all random. Suddenly, he realized he was already up and following Sam, who was heading towards the place were the game was already being played. When they arrived they noticed that the jugglers were actually Stari and some other person, a kid, wearing red clothes. In the middle, were Kaia and Vozem. It was strange, but as soon as he saw it, it all made perfect sense to O´Neill. Sam was still hung up on the logic of it. It made no sense. Being that her primary thought, she started saying so.
"This is.....amazing. Do you realize what the chaces are of winning a bet? They´re.....one over a.....big number. It makes no sense it-"
O´Neill interrupted her, "It´s fun. I think that´s all the point. They don´t even bet any real money, only round stones with holes in them."
"That makes no sense. What´s the point?"
"No point just.....fun."
Another voice came from behind Sam, cutting off her argument.
"Jack is right. It is simply fun. Fun to watch and fun to play, it takes years to master it enough to play." Iablaka smiled at them. She was very drunk for sure, she actually seemed to like them.
This time, it was O´Neill who interrupted her, "So how does it work?"
Iablaka called over a small boy, maybe six years old. He carried a bag, filled with the stones, Iablaka put one into the bag and looked at O´Neill. He had no idea what to say, he stared at the game, pretending he was looking at something important. Sam stared at him, still completely convinced it was practically impossible to bet and win. O´Neill´s vision went out of focus and all he saw suddenly were six different colored points, then he saw it, he knew what would happen.
"The purple one´s gonna hit that kid over the head."
The boy bowed down and went back to were he´d been standing before. Sam stared at O´Neill, who only shrugged at her.
"What? It´s worth a shot....."
"Actually, it´s not. The posibilites of you being right are-"
"One over a big number?"
Sam smiled, "Yes."
"OK, it´s a good thing I didn´t bet two stones then."
Sam smiled again and was about to say something when something happened. The purple cube hit the kid square in the head. Everything stopped. Stari seemed proud to have hit the kid, the kid looked pissed, Vozem and Kaia were laughing so hard they could barely stand up straight and O´Neill gloated over Sam, who could not believe what had just happened. Before Sam had a chance to argue the point that the chances of that happening were one over a big number again, O´Neill took her glass and went to get another drink. He was just waiting to get them when Daniel came over to him, he looked concerned.
"Hi Jack."
"Daniel."
"So ah.....having a good time?"
"It´s OK." He shrugged his shoulders.
Daniel took a deep breath and cleared his throat, "Hey, ah, listen, Jack do you notice anything, I don´t know.....strange, going on?"
O´Neill really didn´t want to have this converstaion right now, he decided it was best if it was a short and quick thing, "What do you want, Daniel?"
"Well to be quite honest with you....." Daniel crossed and uncrossed his arms several times, O´Neill rolled his eyes, getting impatient, "OK ah.....I was just kinda wondering what´s going on."
"Going on where?"
"Well uhm.....you know, going on between you and ah....." He looked over at Sam, who was still watching the game but was having a discussion with Iablaka about it. O´Neill looked over at her, it was something about where the game had come from.....he was interrupted by Daniel´s voice, "I mean you two were just standing there and uhm.....it just looked like....."
"Like we were over there?" O´Neill hoped that would shut Daniel up. It did, but he still gave him a look. O´Neill rolled his eyes, "What´s your point?"
"My point? You´re not serious, are you? I mean, what about when we get home?"
"What about it?"
"Look it´s just that you know how it is.....and it seems like for the past couple of days something happened between the two of you and I´m just wondering if you realize what´s at stake here."
"Daniel, were not even on base."
"That´s my point exactly I mean, think about, Jack....." O´Neill rolled his eyes again but Daniel wasn´t about to let this go, "Look I only bring it up because I think it has something to do with this place, with whatever was done to us. I just don´t want you getting home to a court martial appointment."
"Now see? That makes no sense at all. Who´s gonna tell ´em? How would they find out?"
"Tell them? Jack I don´t think you realize what you´re saying! It´s not about them finding out or not-"
"Damn it, Daniel! Look, do you look like my mother?"
Daniel was confused, but decided to go with it anyway, "Ah.....I hope not."
"My father?"
"No, I think."
"Any close relative? Distant cousin? Neighbor?"
"No."
"And do I look sixteen?"
"No."
"Like a complete idiot."
"I suppose not."
"Then would you mind keeping out of what is, clearly, none of your business."
"I´m just worried about you, about the both of you. I don´t want you to get home tomorrow and realize you made some sort of big mistake or realize that you weren´t in complete control or-"
"Daniel, please, please listen very carefully. Whatever you could possibly conjure up in that little head of yours, you´re wrong."
He started to walk away, but Daniel was, as usual, being his stubborn self, "I´m just really worried, Jack. Don´t take it the wrong way, but I think this is my business."
"Why is that?"
"Because you and Sam are my friends."
"OK.....if we´re your friends, why don´t you show a little trust then?"
"That´s my point.....something´s going on here, Jack. We´ve changed, all of us. That´s what worries me, all of a sudden, I.....I came here because I´m worried about what´ll happen when you´re caught, not about the rules. It´s like I just woke up this morning and a lot of rules we live by seemed pretty stupid to me. That´s what worries me, Jack. Don´t you see it?"
O´Neill stopped. Daniel did have a point, sort off, "Look, by tomorrow afternoon we´ll be gone, everything will be back to normal I just.....don´t think it´s worth worrying so much."
"But doesn´t that bother you?"
"Yeah it does, a lot. There´s nothing I can do about it right now though so....."
"Why worry?"
"Exactly."
He walked away. This time, Daniel didn´t follow. O´Neill didn´t look back, but he was a little worried. He got back and handed Sam the glass. For a second, he wondered.....
"Hey ah.....Iablaka, what´s in this stuff anyway?"
Iablaka looked at Jack as if he was asking her to explain why the universe existed, "Fruit.....why do you ask?"
"You don´t add anyting to it, any –special- ingredients?"
"No." Iablaka looked over at Sam, who started looking very worried. The girl suddenly turned back to O´Neill, a look of relief on her face, "You are worried this is the reason for your change in behavior." O´Neill said nothing, he didn´t need to, "It is not. You are very complex people. Your minds have many, many layers: what you know, what you feel, what you think, what the world knows of you, what strangers know of you, what feelings you let others see.....When you became Padeos, everything we are and know and believe and feel was put into your minds but because you yourselves do not even realize all that goes on in your minds and hearts, there is great conflict within you. You are being forced to comfront many thoughts you did not even know existed in you mind and that has changed you, greatly."
"OK.....is it normal?"
"Yes. The difference is that you were not raised to be Padeos, you were simply made one. Your mind was not prepared."
"Don´t ya think a little warning would have been wise?"
"We did not know this would happen. We did not understand you, we still do not. You must find balance between your heart and mind, but only in the heart do the answers truly lie." Iablaka noticed both Sam and O´Neill were confused, "Simply put, you must come to terms with all you think and feel. I do not know if what was done to you will be temporary, it seems to be that way because you are no less powerfull than any other here but, in the time it takes for you to change back to normal, you must find balance."
Iablaka would of continued, but Vozem and Kaia came over. It was someone else´s turn to play the game. Kaia stopped smiling as soon as she came close to them. She knew. Sam looked at her, somehow, she´d come to trust this girl for practically everything in the time since they´d first met. Vozem was completely clueless about what was going on, and promptly started teasing Iablaka about something or other that was going on between her and Malinki. Kaia rolled her eyes but quickly turned her attention back to Sam, "I had hoped your minds would be at peace tonight."
"Well you were wrong."
"You have no need to be hostile towards me, Jack. Iablaka is right, you must find balance." Neither Sam nor O´Neil said anything, "Many of your rules are.....illogical, unnecesary to my way of thinking. I know this is the biggest problem you have but the problem does not lie within the rules themselves, but within your feelings. You spend so much time thinking about the rule itself that you have forgotten all the feelings that led you to hate it. The rule is not the problem, and the solution would not be to ignore it." Still, Sam and O´Neill said nothing, "If you truly wish no know what I recommend: let it go. Do not think or question your feelings or the rules." At that moment, Iablaka hit Vozem. She´d had enough of his teasing. Kaia turned to help him up and suggested they go get something to drink. Before leaving, she turned to O´Neill, "I was not wrong. Up until now, your minds were at peace. You were here and you were happy and, it was not the end of the world."
After she left, Iablaka started going on about why men were so annoying. Sam had to admit, she was a nice person. It took a while, but Sam found herself gradually falling deeper and deeper into conversation with the girl. In the back of her mind she realized Kaia was right, the best thing to do was to stop worrying, it seemed to work. Another couple of hours and the whole event was practically forgotten. Daniel joined them, at first eyeing his two teamates, but Kaia said something to him and he too, started to relax. Teal´c was still too busy with the other Jaffa to have of even noticed what had happened. Once more, the voices of their past selves were pushed to the back of their minds only this time, they felt good about it.
