"Sir, do you have any idea where we´re going?"
"Well.....we´re defenately going down."
"Are you lost?"
"No.....maybe. I might be a little disoriented."
"Disoriented? You have no idea where we are, do you?"
"Look, it´s not that big a mountain, we can´t be far off."
"How do you figure?"
"Well when we came up we got there pretty fast, right? And we´ve been walking a while so.....we can´t be far off."
"Maybe we should go back."
"You don´t have much faith in me, do you?"
"It´s not about faith, sir, it´s about the fact that you don´t know where we are."
"Tell me something, Carter, how many drinks did it take you to get to insubordination?"
"With all due respect, I don´t think I´m being insubordinate, we´re lost."
"Is that really so bad?"
"Well, it depends on where we´ll end up."
"I´m sure someone will notice we´re gone and come look for us."
"I´m not so sure, did you see everyone up there? They´ll be lucky if they can put one foot in front of the other."
"Right well.....it´s not so bad, is it?"
"Maybe you should let me lead."
Oh god no! No. No. No. No. No. Not in those close you´re not. Quick, say something!, "Ah.....maybe we should just keep going....." Oh yeah, that helped! Well, it wasn´t so bad, right? For a drunken man and all. Wait what the hell is she doing? Don´t do that! Well say something you idiot!, "Carter, did I not just tell you not to move?"
See Sam? You see, you see?!? I told you not to move. Now, not only are you following this very drunk man being very drunk yourself, but you are lost and on top of it all you´re in front. Isn´t this comfortable?, "No you didn´t, sir. You said we should keep going."
Way to go, Jack! It´s not so bad, just keep going, keep your eyes down.....on the ground! OK, this is not going to work, just, get in front of her. How? Right! Get her to stop, "Hey, Carter....." Now wasn´t that smart of ya? Now she´s just standing there, staring. Standing. Staring. Now, when you walk, you make sure you walk past. No. No! Past her, past her. "Maybe you´re right. We might be lost."
Understatement of the year! Oh god.....I´ve been hanging around him for too long. So, Sam, say something intelligent. Something un-drunk like. Does that word even exist? Sam? This is the part where you say something. Sam?, "Yeah." Well that was eloquent!
Now is the part where you say we should go back and a killer werewolf comes out of the trees and eats you! Oh I be any drunker? Allright, just concentrate on going back up and this time, make sure YOU lead, "Maybe we shoud go back."
Go back? Go back. Yes. Go back. It´ll be safe there! Lots and lots of people staring at you, or at least, there. Not like here. Everything´s so quiet so isolated. Hey, Sam! How about you at least agree with him. Nod your head, mumble something! Oh....you will regret this in the morning, I know you will. Weren´t you just telling me off a few days ago? What happened to all of that! I know I told you you´d have to listen to me eventually but I didn´t really think it would be this soon. Sam, you can´t breath. Sam! Just open your mouth and let the words come out, "Yeah.....maybe."
OK she´s agreed......sort off. Just turn around. Good! And start walking back up the hill-mountain-thing. Good. Going up and up and up. Good. Good. In silence. Everything here is so quiet. What the hell?, "Uhm....Carter? Wasn´t there only one path when we came down?"
I can´t believe this! Sam, did you not notice these three different paths when you came down? You really have to get your act together, Sam. You haven´t been this drunk in.....never! Sam?, "Uh.....maybe."
Oh great! She´d drunk. You´re drunk. You´re both lost! Just great. This is just peachy, "Maybe? Didn´t you see where we were going?"
How dare he! He´s the one who led you down here! Come on, Sam, say something!, "Well I wasn´t the one leading." Good! Now, keep in mind you´re drunk and on a mountain side, so don´t try to storm off. OK......OK.....no, no. Wait! What are you doing? Oh.....sitting! Good. Well, better than storming off.
What the hell-?, "Carter?"
Sam, stop it. Stop it, Sam. You really have no need to do this, he´s just as bad as you are. Sam?, "I´m thinking."
Good. That´ll solve it. Carter can have brilliant ideas while sober, you can just sit here next to her hoping that Carter can have half-decent ideas while drunk. "Think away....."
Does he have to do that? Come on, Sam! Concentrate on getting back to the people, not on how he just practically sat on you. There you go! That´s good, Sam. Now just say it out loud, "I´m pretty sure it´s that way."
Well, pretty sure is better than being completely lost, right?, "Pretty sure?"
I hate it when he does that. Don´t you, Sam? It´s that look, what is it? I don´t know. Sam? Sam? OK, I´m sorry I mentioned –the look-! Sam!, "I´m sure."
This is the time to say something leader-like, Jack. "OK." Wrong thing.
Sam? What about the rest? You know you have to get back to people, at least down to the cave! Sam?, "Also, when we first came up we were on the North face of the mountain and I think this is the South face. If I remember correctly we also passed a path heading East, if we follow that, we might get back to the North path."
She really doesn´t even sound drunk at all! How does she do that? I don´t think it´s ´cause she´s had practice..... "OK. Let´s go."
He really doesn´t look drunk at all, except he slurrs the words sometimes but it could just be in my head. Uh, Sam? You might wanna move right about now, he´s kinda leaving without you. Sam? Sam? Uh-oh, not good.
Great! This is great! In just a few minutes we´ll be back to civilization, to people. It´s so quiet here. Not to wear out the cliché but a little too quiet. What the-? Where the hell is she?, "Carter?"
There you go, see? Happy? Now he´s gone and realized you´re not behind him. I bet he´ll be all worried and the like, giving you all kinds of looks you pretend you don´t know what they mean but you do and you, in fact, enjoy it when push comes to shove and he´s worried about you and gives you does looks.....uh, Sam? What the hell? What are you laughing for? You were concieving your drunkedness so well! What happened? Sober up! Too late.....
OK maybe I rushed into things when I said she wasn´t drunk. Wait. That´s not what I said. I said she didn't sound drunk. Right. Oh well, "Carter? You OK?" Stupid question! She´d obviously not missing any limbs or anything.....
There! See! The look! And don´t go pretending this time it´s only ´cause he´s drunk, ´cause it´s not! Now you see what you´ve gone and done. He´s sitting down again. It was all going so well, you really need to get back to people. Get back home. I´m all for the whole "no-rules" attitude but.....doesn't this make you a little nervous, Sam? Guess not. Probably too drunk to notice, "Sir, why are we here?"
OK I just hope to God this isn´t Carter getting all philosophical on me. Not a good subject for me, most of the time, "Here? You mean sitting in the middle of a forest?"
Did he just seriously think it was a philosophical question? That was amusing at least, right Sam? You´re both way to drunk to be getting philosophical right now, right?, "Technically, I think it´s the side of a mountain, sir."
Well that´s good! Well then the question is simple enough, "Carter, we´re lost."
Really? I hadn´t noticed!.....Oh god, I´ve been hanging around him too long, "I know but why are we here?"
OK I take it back, she does sound a little drunk, "We were trying to get back to the cave."
Really? I dunno, Sam. It all seems sorta suspicious, "Why?"
OK I really don´t like this phase of Carter-drunk, can´t she just go back to knowing everything?, "Because I wanted to check on Daniel."
Oh right! Daniel! You remember, Sam? He got a little too drunk when Koshka bet him he couldn´t hold his licor. You warned him not to do it. So did Jack, I mean, the Colonel! Damn it......anyway, back to Daniel. He dropped unconscious, he drank himself to sleep! It was pretty funny, actually. No it wasn´t! Sam? You getting any of this? Sam?, "Right....."
Still not liking this. What is going on here? It was all going fine, just fine. So we were a little lost. At least we weren´t sitting down. Alone. Down. Alone. Everything is just so quiet out here, "You sure you´re OK?"
Peachy! Oh god.....not again. Sam! Please, Sam, come back to the world of the sober! Your head doesn´t do too well without your obssesive controlling and constant thinking in numbers. Sam?, "I´m fine. I´m just....."
Starting to get a little worried. She looks well enough, but is she really? It´s probably just the bieng drunk with her superior and lost in the middle of the forest thing..... "Look, maybe we should try to get back....."
Is that a hint of nervousness I detect in his voice? I don´t like it when he gets nervous. It means one thing: I´m getting awfully close to proving my point. Maybe it´s not such a good idea when you´re both drunk and off world. I mean, maybe if you were just drunk or just off world, but the both of them. Together. Not good, "I was just thinking....." Big fat lie! Big fat lie! You were not! You´re basking in all that you had to drink! Unless I wasn´t paying attention and you weren´t just ignoring me because you´re drunk but because you´re thinking.....and drunk. Sam?, "We´re going home tomorrow."
A big part of me is not liking were this is going, "Yeah, that´s the idea."
Are you sure you want to do this, Sam?, "I just.....I guess I find it kinda hard to believe."
Well I can certainly understand that. What is it with this planet? It feels like years since we´ve been home, months since I´ve thought about the SGC....., "Yeah, I know." And as usual, way to go!
Sam? I think I know were this is going. Don´t! You know how I´m always telling you you have to face up to certain "issues", I take it back! Graciously side-step the issue! Sam?, "I just.....I guess I was thinking about what Kaia said."
Oh, right....., "Oh, right....."
Well there´s just no taking it back now! Sam?, "I just.....everything is just so different here."
Avoid it! Avoid it!, "Oh yeah I mean, the trees are just such a different shade of green."
Why does he do that? How does he do that? Why are you smiling? He´s avoiding it! Sam?, "I just.....everything seems to work so well here."
Avoid it! Avoid it!, "Yeah but, Daniel did have a point.....we don´t belong here....." Damn it! What am I doing? Am I seriously doing this? Apparently so.
Why is he not avoiding this? Sam?, "I know. I guess I´m , or something."
Damn it!, "Well-.....I ah-.....it´s just that usually I´m the one confused." Finally! Nice and gracefull.
Sam?, "Yeah but.....I think she had a point, about the to terms part."
It´s really, really quiet out here, "Yeah, I know but, I don´t know. Maybe right now it´s just, not really the time....."
Sam?, "Right."
Really quiet out here, "Maybe we should just.....get outta here."
Sam!, "Right."
Quiet. Wait.....she´s not moving. Oh, damn it! Now she´s pissed. See what you do? If you´d just avoided this from the beginning and dragged her outta here..... "Look, what do you want me to say?"
Sam? Just don´t do anything-"Well I don´t know! But at least.....something!"
Not good. Now don´t do anything-"Well I can´t! Jeez, what the hell do you want from me?"
"I don´t know!"
"Then what´s the problem here! Why don´t you call me when you know what you want?!?"
"So you do, what? Avoid it again? I don´t understand why you do this!"
"Because I have to! Because I can´t say anything. Don´t you get that! It would mean my career and yours."
"Oh right! Because we have such perfect military records! Wouldn´t want to ruin that!"
"It´s not about that! You could loose everything. Do you understand that, everything!"
"Don´t you think that choice should be up to me?"
"No, I don´t!"
"Really? Well it´s not like you have any right in my life, is it?"
"Look, I am your commanding officer-"
"Don´t you dare bring that into this."
"Don´t I dare? It´s not like it has nothing to do with it!"
"Fine!"
"Fine!"
The silence had been broken. It wasn´t just outside. Inside too. So many thoughts and feelings went through both of them so quickly it would have been hard to catch a glimpse of one. O´Neill walked away, with every intention of leaving Sam there. He couldn´t believe how angry that woman made him. Sam sat back down and stared at the trees, they really were a different shade of green.....
"Jack....." She didn´t even know why she called out to him. It´s not like she had anything to say to him, did she?
A voice in his head told him to keep going. It wasn´t wise to complicate things like this. He was never a very wise man. He walked back, Sam looked up at him, "Look, Sam it´s just that.....I know it should be your choice but....." That was about as much as he was going to say. He shrugged his shoulders but he didn´t stop looking at her, for one second, she heard him, in her head. He smiled weakly. She stood up.
"We should try to get back."
He nodded his head. He waited until they´d gone five steps before saying something, "Maybe we should do this again, sometime. It was kinda.....liberating and stuff."
Sam looked back at him. She rolled her eyes at him and smiled. She waited for him to catch up to her. After that, they walked side by side, and a lot closer than what their bosses would of liked.
