Underneath It All

There's just so much shit in the way of it

When it seems like nothing more will fit,

Another load is piled on top

The stack so high, so heavy that it's hard to imagine anything could survive beneath

But it remains

Underneath it all

The first meeting is what started it in motion

Unsteady emotions crashing into each other like waves of an ocean

There was no trust, not yet

But I could see the care in his eyes, and I knew this was only the beginning

And it was growing

Underneath it all

One talk after another, and I could feel its formation

The growth was subtle overall, but strong in certain moments – a strange combination

But it was the realest thing I had felt in a while

As I was surrounded by the insanity that was my life

I could feel it

Underneath it all

Even with everything opposing us, I needed to be with him

And I could tell, he with me; it wasn't just a whim

I cared for him differently than anyone else before

Because there were no lies between us; we could understand each other for who we really were.

It was bubbling, bursting to be out in the open

Underneath it all

It took us two years to go out on a date

But that in no way meant it was at all too late

We had dinner and then wanted something more

But our plans were ruined when those agents burst through the door

But it was still there, stronger than ever

Underneath it all

We found our freedom at last when SD-6 went down

And we felt each other for the first time without having to utter a sound

I don't know how long we carried on with our celebratory kiss

Time didn't matter as we remained locked by our lips

It was finally out for everyone to see without having to be

Underneath it all

For a few months, we were happier than most, it seemed

Until I discovered Francie wasn't Francie when she suddenly liked coffee ice cream.

I fought harder than I had in my whole life

And when I woke up, Vaughn suddenly had a wife

But no matter what he had done while I was gone, I still felt it

Underneath it all

So now I sit here all alone

After having just spoken to Vaughn on the phone

I can't help but cry through the pain and loneliness;

He's still with his wife after having made plans for us again

But I know it's still there because I can feel it tearing at my heart

Underneath it all

And sometimes when he looks at me

He's all that I ever want to see

Because I can see it in the look in his eyes

And I know that his feelings for me haven't changed

It's there within him, and it's reserved only for me

Because underneath it all

Is love