"Then find a way to fix it, boy!" Loki mimicked Odin's voice as he morosely stared at the staff on the workbench.
"Of course, Father, I will get right on that! I'll just wave my magic wand!" His voice dripped with sarcasm.
"Gah!"
In a fit of temper, Loki threw the staff against the wall.
"Smart move, that's sure to fix it," Carter muttered under her breath. I shook my head at her warningly.
Before the Asgardian army arrived Loki and I had taken both Carter and Anthony Ryan to the side and filled them in on what was happening.
Loki didn't go exactly into details of the why of it but did explain he had created Beaumont and that Beaumont was now working with Halja to create an army of undead to conquer Midgard in Hel's name.
The security system of the hold would have to be deactivated since it would be constantly triggered by the Asgardian Army camping on our doorstep and without it, the hold wouldn't be the safest place to be.
Anthony reluctantly agreed to return to Oxford for now, but Carter insisted on staying.
"I am not powerless, if it comes to it I can defend myself. I am a Bee too! And on top of that, you are family! I love my own parents very much and I know they love me, but they will never be able to understand my life, be able to understand me, in the way you two do! You might need me before all of this is over, so I'm staying."
I had been about to argue but Loki had shaken his head at me. I could see Carter's words had touched him. He had come to care a lot about her too, almost as much as about Jessie.
"No one should ever be made feel less than they are," Loki said. "If you feel that this is your place, and you feel you are powerful enough to stand with us, I will gladly have you by our side."
Loki didn't seem so glad now. He glared at Carter.
"You have a better idea?" He sniped.
"Replace the gem," she said as she eyed him defiantly.
"I suggested that before," I said to no one in particular since neither of them was listening to me.
"And you just happen to have a replacement part for a thousand years old alien artifact lying around, do you? Because I sure as hell don't!" Loki growled back at Carter.
"No, of course not! But there have got to be items of a similar power on Midgard that might be a suitable replacement!" Carter wasn't phased by Loki's temper.
"Any particular suggestion?" Loki asked acerbically.
Having the AllFather visit the Asgardian encampment regularly had done nothing to improve his mood. The way Odin kept belittling him made him feel small and insignificant, and in response, Loki was lashing out at those around him.
Carter was quiet for a moment. A frown appeared on her face and she pursed her lips as she was thinking.
"Actually… I might have. Let me get one of my textbooks!" She ran out of the room.
"Of course! Why didn't I think of that? The answers to all my woes simply lie in a Midgardian University textbook!" Loki yelled after her.
"She's only trying to help," I said gently.
"I need neither sympathy nor pity! I need a bloody miracle!"
"Hey…" I reached out to him, not certain if he wanted to be comforted or if he'd snap my head off as well. Loki, observant as always, saw my hesitation and sighed. "I'm sorry," he said softly.
I took him in my arms.
"I know it isn't easy having him around," there was no need to clarify who I meant by 'him'.
"He presumes I am to obey his every back and call, and treats me like I am still an obstinate child." Loki ran a hand through his hair.
My talk with Odin hadn't done much, or so it seemed. For a moment I thought I had gotten through to the ancient god, but Odin and Loki had fallen back into a behavioural pattern that went back centuries.
I couldn't see anything more I could do to help but to be there for Loki afterwards.
"Got it!" Carter came in waving a textbook. "Here, look…"
Loki walked over, sceptically eyeing the page she was pointing at. He frowned for a second.
"That… that might actually work!" Suddenly his face began to brighten. "This could actually work!" He picked Carter up and swung her around. "You brilliant genius!"
"Put me down you big idiot," she grinned back. "I told you I could help."
"My apologies," Loki didn't look apologetic at all as he put Carter down again.
"And don't cheer too soon. Do you know where the gem is right now?"
Loki shook his head.
(Oh my. Dear reader, I am sorry for breaking the fourth wall like this, I try not to do that too often. But right now, I am about to write what could be construed as a confession to playing part in the planning and execution of a major felony. So, for the sake of covering my own behind: this chapter, unlike the other chapters, is completely fictional and any similarities between any crime that may or may not have been committed in the real world are completely coincidental and not an admission of guilt from either myself or my husband.)
Carter revealed that the gem had been part of the dowry of a certain queen centuries ago, gifted to her husband who had commissioned a crown with the gem as its centre decoration. The crown had a complicated history; having been stolen, hidden, lost, recovered, and taken abroad several times. Eventually, it was returned to its country of origin, where it was stored away in a vault at the National Museum for safekeeping.
It seemed that the gem's magical properties were long forgotten, the crown was merely treated as an object of historical value. Still, it would be almost impossible to get.
"Perhaps we could simply ask the Council of Venice," Carter suggested. "If we explain what it is for…"
Loki shook his head. "We can not guarantee it will work with the staff and even if we could, they are already unhappy about hosting an alien army, I doubt they'd be comfortable granting us an item that would only make us even more powerful."
"But you are on their side!"
"For now," Loki corrected. "They can't trust Asgard will be content to simply leave after Hel has been defeated, and historically it has never worked out well for humanity when the gods turn Midgard into their playing ground.
I am afraid we are on our own here."
"The museum is hosting a charity event this weekend, with the crown as its centrepiece," I said.
"How do you know that?" Loki asked suspiciously.
"Google," I smiled sweetly. Loki just sighed.
"Fine, so that means that the crown will be out of the vault for the charity night, which will make it easier to get it…" Loki's eyes began to shine.
"Oh, darling?" he asked in a sing-song voice.
"Yes, love?" I asked wearily, having a feeling that I already knew what Loki was about to suggest.
"How would you feel about going on a date to the museum this weekend?"
"It is highly exclusive, and we don't have an invitation." I pointed out.
"I am the god of Mischief, I don't need an invitation," he winked at me.
"Just to look and see if it is fit for purpose, right?" I asked worriedly. "Right, Loki?"
Loki practically skipped out of the room. "Come along, darling, we will have to go clothes shopping! It's been forever since I went on a heist! This is going to be so much fun!"
"Loki!"
I buried my head in my hands.
Carter patted me on the shoulder sympathetically.
" Hey, at least you can't say he never takes you anywhere nice," she grinned.
"Shouldn't we at least have a plan, printed-out maps, I don't know? Prepared somehow? Like they do in the movies?" I fidgeted with my handbag.
Loki just grinned. He was wearing a brand-new tux. We were in a car we had rented under a false name, and our faces changed subtly with Loki's magic.
It was weird to see his familiar cheeky grin on a face that wasn't quite his own.
"You watch too many movies. We don't need floorplans, the crown will be right at the centre of the exhibition."
"Right! It will be guarded and have a special case and everything!"
Loki winked. "Just trust me, darling. The gem will be ours before the evening is over."
The area in front of the museum was well-lit for the charity event, and well-guarded. Loki got out and handed the rental car keys to the valet. We hadn't gone in his own car because its unusual features would draw too much attention. "I've got this," Loki bounded around the car and opened the car door for me before the valet could offer to.
I took Loki's hand and tried to get out as elegantly as I could, the voluminous red silk of my skirt swirling around me as I got out of the car. The bodice of the evening gown was strapless and carefully sculpted to not just fit perfectly, but display my curves as flattering as possible. I placed a hand on Loki's arm, who gallantly led me up the steps of the museum. He paused at the top.
"What?" I hissed at him.
"Give a smile and a wave, darling," his eyes twinkled as he was enjoying himself.
I turned around. Below the stairs were paparazzi who started taking pictures the moment we turned around. Loki waved cheerfully with a white begloved hand, I followed suit.
"So much for laying low," I muttered.
"They think we are nobodies, they'll delete these before we've stepped into the museum," Loki whispered back.
An impeccably-dressed man at the top of the stairs greeted us politely.
"Invitations please?" he asked.
I held my breath, we had none.
Loki's eyes glowed green for a second.
"The Goddess Queen of Jotunnheim and her Prince Consort. You have our invitations. We are on your list."
"Ah, The Goddess Queen of Jotunnheim and her Prince Consort. Welcome, your Majesty. Your Highness." he bowed politely with a slightly vacant look on his face. "I have your invitations already, and I see you are on our list."
Loki was about to move on, but I held him back.
"Oh, can you make him say 'These aren't the droids we're looking for' as well?" I asked, smiling mischievously.
"Well, yes, I suppose so," Loki looked slightly confused but his eyes glowed green again.
"There aren't the droids you are looking for," Loki said.
"These aren't the droids we're looking for", was obediently repeated in the same slightly vacant way.
"Oh yes! I love you so much right now," I giggled as I walked into the museum on Loki's arm.
"Sorcha? Please tell me that was not one of your Science Fiction movie pop culture references, was it?" Loki asked suspiciously.
"Sorcha? Sorcha!"
I just laughed. "That was a Star Wars quote. You really need to watch those movies with me someday. Thor owes me a week's worth of dishes, I knew I could trick you into doing that eventually!"
"I detest you so much right now!" Loki hissed, as he smiled at the people already in the main hall.
I just giggled again, partially because I was giddy with nerves.
Loki easily mingled with the other guests, always polite and charming, never staying in one place too long to outstay his welcome.
Witty and elegant, soon all eyes in the room were upon him, no one completely sure who exactly he was, but no one wanting to admit they weren't familiar with him either. Not a single person questioned whether he belonged, it was obvious to everyone in the room that he did.
I quickly realised that all I had to do was to keep my mouth shut. Pretty women on the arm of a powerful man were to be seen, not heard.
Which was a good thing, because if I get nervous, I babble. And I hadn't been this nervous since the night of our surprise engagement party.
As Loki had predicted, the crown was on display in the centre of the exhibition, protected by a bullet-proof glass case and surrounded by multiple guards in dress uniforms. I had no idea how Loki was planning to take the crown without anyone noticing and what was more, I had a sneaking suspicion Loki had no idea either. He was winging it, and that terrified me more than a little.
There were more than a few familiar faces amongst the other guests: royalty, nobility, politicians and socialites I recognised from the cover of the gossip magazines.
"Is that?" I asked Loki incredulously as I recognised a certain former leader of a certain country. I despised the man; not only was he a racist, sexist, homophobic jerk, but he had also led his country with an amount of stupidity that horrified me to this day.
Loki smiled. "Let's go and say hello, shall we?"
I knew he despised said politician as much as I did and had made so clear in the past, rather verbosely, in multiple languages, with words I'd rather not repeat.
"No, I'm not going over there!"
"Just smile and nod, darling. It would draw attention if we didn't at least politely greet him, and we are trying not to stand out, remember?"
Loki greeted the man warmly, his large hand engulfing the hand proffered to him.
I shuddered as it was my turn next, the man's handshake was weak and limp and sweaty.
Loki chatted for a while, his witty remarks barbed and flying right over the head of the politician, but not over that of his companion for the evening, who, as I noticed was trying to stifle a laugh.
After a while, Loki led me away again.
"I think I know enough to be able to take the crown," he whispered softly. "But I will need your phone."
I hesitated. My phone was standard Templar issue. Besides being encrypted and getting amazing reception no matter where I was in the world, it also doubled as a hacking tool that could bypass almost any security system.
"The Templars will know it was their technology if you use it," I whispered back.
"It can not be helped. But I need to hack into the security system and disable it."
I nodded reluctantly and handed Loki my phone.
"I will take care of the guards in the building as well. You, my darling, will need to stay here. If I am correct about the type of security that is used here, the lights will flicker as the backup system comes online which I will need to disable as well. You will need to buy me time by creating a diversion at that point."
"Me? Create a diversion? How?"
"Just come up with something," Loki winked and kissed my cheek.
"You have got this darling, I have full faith in you!"
With my heart in my throat, I watched him saunter right past the guards, hidden by his magic. While the guards might not be able to see him, I was pretty certain it would not be enough to bypass the security system's scanners. Sure enough, one of the guards quietly followed in the same direction as Loki had gone. I just had to trust Loki would deal with the guard.
I looked around me. With Loki gone, I was now standing alone. I smiled at a waiter and took a glass of champagne as I slowly began moving through the room. It was busy, but not enough to be crowded. I had no idea how to create a diversion, not one that wouldn't draw all the attention to me anyway. I silently cursed Loki. I wasn't made for this sort of thing, I had no idea what to do!
Before I could even begin to formulate the start of a plan, the lights in the room flickered. The guards tensed, but relaxed again as the backup system came online.
Well, shit.
I looked around me, desperate for something I could use to create a diversion. My eyes landed on the reviled ex-politician. His face was red and pouchy, healthy wasn't a word I'd use to describe him. He was sweating heavily.
I know that what I did next was terrible, but I was running out of time and Loki was counting on me. Besides that, it was for a good cause, right?
I carefully gathered my blood magic, hiding my hand behind my voluminous skirt so no one would see the globe of blood gathering.
I can use my magic to heal, but also to harm, something I wasn't fond of doing.
As I suspected, the heart of my mark was working overtime. I reached out with my magic and gently began to squeeze. With grim satisfaction, I watched his face turn grey beneath his fake tan, and he gasped as he clutched his chest.
To anyone else, it looked like he was having a heart attack. All I had to do was release my magic and he would be alright again, at least, I hoped he'd be. People quickly gathered around, trying to ring emergency services but finding their signals jammed by Loki with my phone.
"That is remarkably villainous of you, darling. Who knew you had it in you?" Loki's voice purred in my ear. I jumped a mile in the air and almost dropped my spell.
"Unfortunately, I couldn't hack the backup, time for Plan B. Darling, could you fry the wiring with your lightning magic instead?"
"What? But they'll see me!"
"All eyes are on your handiwork, I'll deal with the guards. Now! Before it's too late!" Loki barked.
I let go of my blood magic and blast a powerful lightning bolt through the nearest plug, at the same time as Loki's eyes turned green and the guards around the crown collapsed.
Screams went up around us as the building went dark.
"Ow, shit!" I heard Loki swear in the pitch-black above me. I realised he had changed into his Jotunn form and had banged his head on one of the rafters.
"Well, none of this is going my way," he grumbled as he strained.
"Hurry up!" I knew that at any moment the guards from outside would raise the alarm and come into the building.
There was a loud tearing noise as Loki lifted the pedestal glass case and all, and smashed the glass against the marble tile on the floor.
"Let's go!" Loki's voice now sounded below me.
"I can't see a thing!" I panicked.
"Change shape," he snapped, "into something with night vision!"
I obediently turned into an owl and flew up.
Beneath me I saw a black panther, eyes glowing green as the screams of panic grew silent. One by one, the guests fell into a slumber.
"They shouldn't remember a thing! Now go, go!" Loki grabbed the crown in his maw and ran. I flew after him, not through the main entrance but deeper into the building.
The museum had formerly been a castle, and I lost all sense of direction as I followed Loki through hallways and stairwells until we found ourselves outside. There was a lawn behind the building and a steep cliff wall behind that.
Loki dropped the crown and shape-changed into a raven. "You carry it, you are bigger than I am. Quick!"
I picked up the crown with my claws. It was heavy and difficult to keep hold of. I had a hard time flying but did the best I could. Behind us, guards came pouring out of the building, heavily armed and bearing torches.
"They can't have gone this way, it's a dead end!" One of them yelled.
I dropped the crown on the forest ground above the cliffs and changed back into my own form at the same time as Loki.
His eyes sparkled as he laughed. "You were magnificent! That was amazing! I haven't had this much fun in a long time!"
"We should go, they'll find us!"
"No, they won't. There is no way for anyone to scale that cliff as quickly as we did, they will not bother to look here." He chuckled again, obviously in his element.
"Will you just relax? We did it! Enjoy the fruit of your labour!"
Helicopters were arriving above us, but as Loki had said, none of them came our way, instead, they were searching the roads leading up to the museum.
Loki picked up the crown and wiped it down with a handkerchief.
"Ugly thing, isn't it?" he eyed it with distaste. With the point of his dagger, he pried the gem off and stuck it in his pocket.
"Think you could return it?" he asked with a grin.
The air around me turned colder as an icy wind lifted the crown and placed it onto the parapet of the castle.
"That will confound them," Loki grinned happily.
"That was crazy!" I laughed despite myself.
"Fun, wasn't it?" Loki's eyes shone into mine. "You didn't happen to bring something to eat, did you? I'm always starving after a heist!"
Before I could confirm anything he was already spreading out his jacket on the forest floor.
I sat down beside him, opened my purse and took out a bulging napkin. I unfolded it to unveil a selection of canapes. Loki grinned.
"I was raised in poverty, I never pass up a chance for free food," I grinned back at him.
Loki put his arm around me as we watched the guards mill around below us, while we enjoyed our impromptu picnic.
"You would make an amazing villainess, you know that?" Loki eyed me up and down appreciatively. "It's rather sexy, actually."
I blushed. "I'm not sure if it's my thing, I was so nervous the whole way through. Weren't you?"
"Of course I was, that's what makes it so enjoyable!"
"You are insane!" I shook my head at him, unable to hide a smile.
"Ah, but you have always known that," Loki purred as he stroked a finger past my cheek, put his hand behind my neck and kissed me passionately.
A helicopter flew over and we both froze, but they could not see us through the branches of the trees above us.
Loki chuckled huskily.
"If I had known married life was this much fun, I would have married centuries ago!"
