Disclaimers, etc.: see chapter one
Opening Theme: No Way Back (AAA Dome Tour 15th Anniversary - thanx AAA lot - Live) by AAA
Ending Theme: Party It Up - City Summer Party Remix - by AAA

Chapter 06 written 10/16/2022

Bleach: Cross
Princess on Vacation
by Eugena

Rated M

Chapter Six: The Gods See It

天国的白雪公主

KARAKURA TOWN - CLOTHING STORE

"I thought Mr. Urahara and mom had fun all the time, big sister," Ururu said to Shirahime as she led her, Jinta, Yachiru and Raiko to the kid's section. Daichi followed them.

"Um, adult fun, dear."

Ururu called Shirahime big sister since Shirahime was a member of the eleventh division. Yoruichi accepted her as her own daughter, even though Urahara created her. Yoruichi refused to have Urahara be "dad", because at the time, he hated Shirahime.

Yachiru showed her bathing suit to the group.

"Girls are gross," Jinta complained.

"Then should I just send you home?" Shirahime asked. "Tessai won't even have to walk you. I'll just zap you with my god powers."

"Mr. Kisuke!" Jinta called. "Kami-sama is threatening me!"

"Then you should behave for our kami-sama," Tessai said as he walked over. Daichi, Sierra, and Momo came behind him.

"Are these all the two of yours?" the shopkeeper asked Shirahime, smiling between her and Tessai.

Shirahime's expression froze on her face.

"Oh, no," Tessai said. "You're mistaken. This is my adopted son. We are helping my friend's eldest daughter," he gestured to Shirahime, "pick out some swimsuits for her younger sister and children."

"Oh, sorry, but how nice!" the shopkeeper said. "Do you need any help?"

"I want a bathing suit like Chiru-onee-san's," Raiko said.

"I have just the thing!" the shopkeeper said. "It will match your hair, too. Be right back."

Jinta looked very unimpressed.

"I'm sorry," Raiko said, "but no matter how you pout, I just can't marry you."

"Sister's marriage is already arranged," Daichi added.

"What makes you think I'm interested in being around you?" Jinta asked.

"You keep looking at me funny," Raiko said.

"I do not!"

"Yes, you do," Shirahime said.

"I just don't get how kami-sama makes you appear. You're different. You're not like these others."

"I'm a god, like mama is," Raiko said.

"Don't you mean half god?"

"Half?"

"Don't bother sister," Daichi said. "She's a god, so don't make her angry. She's scarier than eldest sister if you make her mad."

The shopkeeper returned. She held up a bathing suit in the same cut as Yachiru's but in solid blue.

"I love it, Raiko!" Yachiru said.

"Can I have this one, mama?"

"Of course, you can. Let's show it to the others. Tessai, why don't we give the two of you some space while grumpy Jinta picks something out?"

"Sounds like a good idea. Let's keep looking, Jinta."

Back with the others, Retsu Unohana held up the yellow bathing suit she showed Shirahime to Lafiel.

"You have such good taste, Unohana Taicho. I think I should buy that one!"

Unohana giggled.

Urahara ripped the bathing suit out of Lafiel's hands - literally.

"Dad will pay for that one," Shirahime said as she walked over.

"What happened to that sensible one-piece I picked out for you, Lafiel?"

"It was too plain and boring, dad. Shouldn't I show -," she flicked her hair and gestured down her body, "this off?"

"Not in front of me you won't!"

"But you drool over Matsumoto all the time. And Orihime - and Orihime's not even an adult yet!"

"That's true," Shirahime backed her. "And that's so wrong. I ought to beat you for that!"

"So?" Urahara said. "Do you know what Ichigo thinks about you all the time?" he asked Shirahime. "Not to mention what -."

"Yeah, I do," she interrupted, "and it is disgusting. And it is inappropriate. No matter how many times Rangiku here," she pointed to her, "thinks it's cute to shove her breasts in Ichigo's face, it's really gross. He is a child!"

"But Gin always loved that!" Rangiku exclaimed.

"I really want to vomit now," Shirahime said. "Don't ever mention that man to me."

Lafiel gave a disgusted look. "Last time he was here, he tried to - tried to - what a gross weasel face! Trying to do things with me because I look so much like jiejie here."

"I think we should castrate the man, Kisuke," Yoruichi said. "Twice. Once for each of our daughters."

"Absolutely," Kisuke agreed.

"I can't believe you ever let that man touch you - and - you know all that other stuff willingly, Matsumoto," Soi Fon said. She didn't outright say what she wanted with her youngest sister and two youngest nieces here.

Shirahime glared at Rangiku. "Consider the kind of relationship you had with that man - that nasty trash - and whether or not it would be appropriate to have with Ichigo."

"Oh, Ichigo would love it."

Shirahime glared at her. "Tell me, does your little shinigami academy teach relations like that are an appropriate thing? Please tell me they do so that I will have someone - or more than someone - to execute - I will in fact execute them all right now. No wonder Kisuke over here has very inappropriate thoughts over high school students like Orihime."

"What man that likes boobies would not have those kind of thoughts and do those kind of things with Orihime?"

"She is a child."

"Well, everyone is a child to you, considering you're a god. Talk about double standards!"

Unohana punched her before anyone could blink.

"I am going to have a talk with Sou Taicho, and a lot of people better be prepared to die," Shirahime hissed.

"You don't really mean that," Rangiku insisted, pinching her bleeding nose.

"Do I sound like I'm joking? Believe me, I don't talk about executing people for fun."

"Shinnouhi," Sierra began, "please don't do the executing yourself. They would really be unworthy of such honor. Please allow me to do it instead. And I could get Zan or Mitsuhiro here if you'd like a man to do some of it. Though any method of execution I am more than willing to perform."

"You have to be kidding!" Rangiku exclaimed.

"Does sister look like she's remotely kidding?" Lafiel asked.

Shirahime held up her hand, her fingers pressed together as if holding a letter. Blue light swirled and a letter appeared in her hand. The observers only had a few moments to view the Chinese text on it. With another flash of blue light, the letter disappeared.

"What was that?" Rangiku asked.

"A letter of instruction," Shirahime answered. "Specifically, a letter detailing to Sou Taicho who in your shinigami academy needs to be arrested and will be awaiting their execution when I return."

"He won't do that," Rangiku said.

"He will do so, or I will execute him myself."

"Then why do you put up with taicho?" Rangiku asked. "If you're so against all this? I shove my breasts in taicho's face all the time, and you put up with him more than you do Ichigo. He's done much more with you than Ichigo - at least I think so. And I know for a fact he's 'done more' in his spare time than Ichigo has, if you get my drift."

"I don't understand," Raiko said.

Yoruichi interjected, "If you explain to my granddaughter what you mean by done more in his spare time means, I swear I will -."

"Toshiro is younger than Ichigo - in human terms. So what's the big deal?" Rangiku asked.

"That's not true," Raiko said. She looked to Shirahime.

"Xiaogu," Sierra interrupted, "that's what I was talking about earlier. The mortals here can't see it."

"Really?" Raiko asked.

"Yes," Daichi said. "They believe he's a child the way he looks. They can't see what he really looks like as we can."

"You must be kidding," Shinjiro said. "You mean that time he stopped hime-sama and I from . . . that this was what he really looked like?"

"No wonder hime-sama didn't chase him off like she does Ichigo all the time," Yumi said.

"That little bastard," Soi Fon said. "I'll show him."

"Shiro really disrespects you, mama," Raiko said. "Can I punish him for you?"

"He'll end up punishing himself," Yoruichi said. "No need for you to do it."

Those in the group that didn't speak Mandarin looked between Raiko and Yoruichi.

"I should punish him myself," Soi Fon said.

"No, Soi Fon," Yoruichi said.

"But he disrespected sister!"

Isane whispered to Retsu. "What did they say, taicho?"

"It's not my place to repeat," she said. "But Hitsugaya is an idiot."

"Were they just talking about his secret?" Kisuke asked Yoruichi.

"What do you think, Kisuke?" she asked.

"Yeah," Kisuke agreed. "He's really stupid on that one."

"Finally makes sense," Retsu muttered.

"Wait 'til I tell Zaraki Taicho," Yumi said.

"I feel a rematch coming on," Shinjiro said.

"Yachiru, why didn't you tell him earlier?" Yumi asked.

"I thought Kenny saw him like I did," she said.

"Gods. Literally," Yumi said.

"Shiro's in trouble, isn't he?" Momo asked Sierra.

"Absolutely," Sierra answered.

谢谢你们的阅读。