A shinobi is supposed to be prepared for anything.
Pain, regret, betrayal, loss, self–doubt, you name it. All of it comes as a package deal. It might be prettily decorated, yes. But the crimson color of the bows they carefully wrap such esteemed titles with, it all comes from unwavering sacrifice.
The blood eventually dries. And the decision to call yourself a ninja is painted an indisputable shade of red.
Red looks good on her.
Certain pink hues match it perfectly and while she wasn't passionate about that sort of thing, not like Ino anyway, she knew that a big part of her job was to understand that responsibility.
Blending in, literally, was the only acceptable alternative.
.
.
Sakura was remarkable. A storm of carefully picked colors. Unlike before, everybody wanted to pair up with her for missions now. It was inevitable, she was someone who could both mend and break—what could ever be more useful? In the past years, with the guidance and ruthless training of Lady Tsunade, Sakura succeeded where many thought she would fail.
But in this exceptional moment, she felt utterly disappointed with herself.
Because despite the many accomplishments, the praise, the undeniable growth, when it came to a certain dark-haired asshole, she still felt inadequate.
Sakura felt like she was 14 again. Small. Alone and scared and crying underneath a blanket of stars that never talked back. The sad part? Sakura was no longer a little girl. But Sasuke left anyway.
Except there he was. Nonchalant and cool and cocky, looking at her as if she was the crazy one. And maybe he was right.
"What the hell, Sasuke? Are you out of your mind!?"
Pacing around mindlessly was something that always used to pacify her, whereas now it simply helped avoid his piercing gaze. Because she could not look at him.
Sakura didn't even bother to clean up the broken pieces of glass just yet; she'd learnt to lick her wounds in solemn secrecy so it could surely wait until this infuriating man was out of her kitchen and out of her house and gone far, far away.
That's what she'd grown accustomed to, anyway.
For all the time she spent drowning herself in work, busying herself with anything that could potentially distract her mind from the unfairness of her situation, she found herself trapped in her own goddamn apartment.
"Sakura."
"NO. You don't get to 'Sakura' me! Do you have any idea how dangerous this is? They could...they could lock you up! And and question you and torture you and then you'd never get to have your glorious avenger moment and what are you even doing here Sasuke?" She was straight up mean now.
"Hn. As if they could."
Nevermind.
The smirk he wore was disgustingly proud. Sakura thought she might just lose it. Has anyone ever slapped this jerk? Like a proper slap, not a bitch slap. The kind that makes the eyes widen with disbelief and frustration as fresh blood pours out of the nose. She thought it unlikely, unfortunately. Once upon a time she used to find this arrogance of his absolutely endearing. Now it made her want to punch something.
It made her want to punch him.
"UGH! You–"
"Hm?"
"You're just SO–"
"Annoying?"
Her jaw dropped to the floor.
"That's IT. Nope. I am NOT doing this. I had an awful day, okay? I've tried SO hard these past weeks, so incredibly hard to just accept whatever it is you went ahead and decided for me because that's how it is apparently since I never have a say in ANYTHING that happens! And then Ino and Kakashi-sensei and even Naruto! All of them expect me to just go on as if nothing changed which is MY fault obviously because none of them know about..."
Green met obsidian and as fleeting as it was, it was electrifying. She felt a shiver run through the entirety of her body.
"It's just cruel...this, whatever this is. It's cruel Sasuke. I went out of my way for you, ALWAYS. I went ahead and said 'hey you're not alone, let me help you' but you told me to leave and then you left me."
You keep leaving me.
"There are ways you can help now. If that's still something you want."
Avoiding the subject then? Fine. Be that way.
"Is that why you're here?"
The lack of response told her everything she needed to know. Sasuke was never someone to openly talk about his feelings. She knew it would be a lost battle, trying to pry an answer out of him. Maybe she could glare at him until he started talking.
Her emotional outburst earlier helped release the heavy tension she'd been carrying within herself for long, antagonizing weeks. Now that she successfully made a fool of herself, Sakura felt like she could breathe properly, think properly and be properly angry. Just because she appeared calmer, that certainly did not mean she had forgiven him.
Sure, he had asked her to but he didn't have to get everything he wanted just because he asked, right? She could still say no. Sakura could easily deny the almighty, fearsome Uchiha.
She was busy getting her thoughts in order but then she turned her head slightly and noticed he was still standing near the door. For a second there she could almost hear her mother scolding her because Sakura, this is not how you treat a guest! I have raised you better than that. Too bad mother didn't have a clue who exactly this distinguished guest was. Or that he showed up uninvited. Jerk.
She sighed. "Want some tea?"
Sasuke apparently took that as an invitation and pulled out two chairs from underneath her small table. Oh, so he was trying to be chivalrous now? But as Ino would say, that's like totally SO outdated and Sakura wasn't some impressionable brat and she definitely did not blush when he sat down and lazily ran one of his hands through dark, heavy locks. It wasn't like she was a sucker for gallantry and it wasn't like he had always carried himself with so much elegance.
No. This was somebody who rudely violated her privacy and somebody who constantly made her cry. So what if she was stupid enough to have feelings for the guy? It was common knowledge that Sakura loved Sasuke. But just because you love someone, that doesn't mean you can't hate them too, right? All is fair in love and war, especially when you're at war with yourself.
There were two steaming cups of tea laid out before them and after turning off the stove, Sakura finally sat down. One thing she despised about all of this was the awkward silence. At least back then she would constantly run her mouth and not that Sasuke ever made an effort to interact with her shameless advances, but it was comfortable.
As a young woman, Sakura had sought him out and met with him secretly and each time that happened, smart and intelligent things came out of her mouth. Mostly.
But considering the way they ended things last time, she found herself a little perplexed. Sakura wasn't shy, she was mainly pissed. Why was it up to her to fix this whole mess?
"What can I do for you, Sasuke?" The mocking undertone in her voice was brutally clear. Good. Just what she was going for.
He merely took a long sip of tea before meeting her eyes fully.
"We're looking for someone. He's an Akatsuki. Goes by the name Deidara."
"Deidara? Yeah, we've met. Unfortunately, that is. He's insane. Then again, all of them need a psych consult if you ask me."
"You've met him huh," Sasuke scowled at her. "This isn't a joke, Sakura."
"Do you see me laughing? Of course I know this isn't a joke. I'm telling you I know this Deidara person! I've fought and killed his partner, Sasori of the Red Sand."
She tugged at her top so that Sasuke could see for himself. Her body was evidence enough—that was the only scar she had refused to heal. Then again, he'd already seen her naked. He had been too busy touching her to look for flaws, he couldn't have noticed it. Her cheeks burned at the memory.
"I do have information. Technically, it's not even treason if I tell you. Konoha's been trying to do something about these guys for awhile now. Ironically, you'd be doing us a favor."
She didn't miss the unfamiliar glint in his eyes. It was getting harder and harder to read him, though. Sakura was torn: was he impressed or offended? Was that peculiar look a mixture of both—she couldn't tell. She just knew that it felt kind of refreshing. Sasuke must've realized he didn't actually have her all figured out. There were still many, many things he didn't know about her. Life happened whether or not he was around. If he felt bad, then he deserved it.
He simply looked at her for a second, almost as if weighing his options. Was he doubting her? Right, because nothing that she does would ever be enough for him. Why did he even bother troubling her evening? To mock her? She hated how cryptic he was.
"They should hear about this too."
Sakura shot him a questioning look.
"My team."
"Oh. Right. Your team. I forgot. Well, I suppose you're all set now, right?"
He suddenly rose from his seat and extended his hand. Sakura was confused. Everything was just very confusing. He was excruciatingly confusing. Was he escorting her to wash the dishes or what?
"Let's go."
"Excuse me?"
Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Use your head, Sakura. The information you possess—it's dangerous. We're not safe here."
"Says the one who tip–toed into enemy territory just to piss me off! As if running god knows where isn't far more dangerous than staying—h-hey! Let go!"
"Be quiet."
He was being mischievous. Knowing she wouldn't oppose him and make a scene, because that obviously meant Sasuke would get caught and she couldn't do that to him.
She pouted, "I hate you."
"Hn. Keep telling yourself that."
Yeah. I will.
Something must've happened to him. This wasn't like him. Maybe she drugged him. It was the fucking tea, wasn't it? Or maybe it was her. She was truly exquisite, that was a given. Well, as exquisite as poison could be, anyway.
Sakura was uncharacteristically quiet, but she was following. Playing catch with the sweet and charming apprentice of Tsunade Senju would have been troublesome, especially since this could be considered kidnapping.
Only it wasn't.
Sasuke kept his eyes locked ahead.
They would arrive soon enough. Funny how she had always been so adamant on communication, yet this whole time Sakura mustered not a single word. It unnerved him.
Made him wonder about who her thoughts travelled to.
Because Sasuke accidentally overheard the rather intimate conversation between her and Naruto. How the blond confessed his love for a girl who never belonged to him. The memory of them together and tightly embraced made him sick. He'd always known Naruto had a soft spot for her, but then again, wasn't that the norm? Many guys liked Sakura. It was an annoying thing back then, too.
But tonight Sasuke felt violently challenged in ways he'd never felt before. Naruto was his rival and the bond the two of them shared was something he had to forcefully bury somewhere deep in the back of his conscience. The word 'brother' no longer held any meaning to him so the twinge of disgust made little to no difference.
He'd always been a betrayer, after all.
Because it was Sasuke who had touched and kissed where others may only dream to. It was Sakura who had allowed it to happen. Damned as he was, she loved him. Sasuke guessed that maybe part of the reason why he wanted her out of the village so badly tonight, was because he saw pink reflected in sky–blue eyes. It was unsettling because it looked...right.
And righteousness was never meant for the Uchiha.
He'd always been an exceptionally good liar. Too bad lies don't work on yourself. And Sasuke being who he was, and his destiny being what is was, he was well aware Sakura would leave in the morning.
And he would let her.
"We're here."
She swiftly landed behind him. Sasuke stepped into the clearing, throughly convinced Karin must've sensed their chakra by now. And judging by the curious looks his current teammates were sending his way, he was right.
It didn't take long before Sasuke noticed Suigetsu's all-knowing grin. It was yet another aggravating reminder that Sakura had a certain effect on men that, to his utter dismay, he had shamefully never been resistant to. At least he was a good liar, right?
"Sasuke! W-What's the meaning of this? This girl! She's a Leaf ninja! What the hell is going on?!"
"Put a sock in it Karin. She is the information Sasuke was talking about, ain't that right Sasuke? Well hello there Pinky! Been awhile sweetheart."
"Um. Hi?"
"This is Sakura. She knows about our target."
Sasuke moved to sit by the fire, and as if sensing her anxiety, he used the heavy look in his eyes to urge everyone to do the same.
"I'm Sakura Haruno. I used to be Sasuke's comrade back when he wasn't a traitor. Pleasure's all mine." He smirked. It was a ghost of a smirk, hardly noticeable but a smirk nonetheless because Sakura was bitter. Finally calling him what he was. Good girl.
"So what does that make you then, huh?"
"That makes me clever," she retorted. And in a way, Sakura was right. The village would inevitably benefit from this, too. "You must be Karin. Very impressive that you could read my chakra signature like that. Konoha could use someone like you."
"You see? She's so fucking nice!"
"I'm Jugo. Thank you for helping Sasuke. I understand our circumstances are dire. You have my sincere admiration."
Then everyone went quiet for a moment. He saw her look to the darkened sky as the night breeze carefully caressed between pale pink tresses. It was getting longer again. Maybe the next time they see each other she would have already cut it.
Sasuke heard her exhale deeply before finally turning to face them. Her green eyes were lit with determination and he knew it wasn't just because of the fire.
"Alright, here's what I know."
She went ahead and described everything that happened, exceptionally attentive to give every detail. Sakura talked about their location and what it took to be able to crush the boulder blocking the entrance to the eerie cave their enemies were in. How each and every one of these people possessed a special, abnormal, inhuman ability.
Deidara, from what she was saying, was someone who developed an unhealthy obsession with art and how, for him, destruction was the ultimate form of creation.
It was an important fact, considering most of his jutsu was based on that philosophy. Sasuke's lightning style would be a brilliant match against his earth style. A perfect counterattack. She then told them about her fight with Sasori. About how if it weren't for a certain Lady Chiyo and her absolute technique, their mission would have been a failure. Gaara was alive solely thanks to her.
Last but not least, Sakura was keen on mentioning that despite everything she told them, the extent of Deidara's power was still unknown.
Sasuke was rendered speechless amidst all this. Something in his chest stung. Sakura had almost died fighting an Akatsuki, and in exchange for her victory, she received news about Orochimaru. She would've sacrificed her life just to see him again.
Memories about that particular encounter flashed before his eyes for a moment, but with some effort, he successfully managed to push them back.
There was no point in dwelling on the past when he would knowingly make the same mistakes in the future.
"Look. I know you all have reasons to doubt me. I don't agree with what Sasuke is doing but as you all know, there's no changing his mind; believe me, I've tried. But if you're going to do this, you have to understand there's no guarantee. The Akatsuki are strong. We know too little about them. I guess all I'm trying to say is," she fixed him with her bewitchingly emerald eyes, "Be careful."
After discussing the key parts of Sakura's story, they decided it was finally time to call it a night. Even Karin, who Sasuke suspected might be a little hostile, retreated to her tent quietly. Suigetsu and Jugo left too, but only after taking the time to properly thank Sakura for her honesty and unfettered cooperation.
It was clearer than ever: not a single one of them had any plans to die just yet.
Apparently, everything they discovered tonight put a special emphasis on something Sasuke had told them from the very beginning: this wouldn't be a walk in the park. There was no certainty they would survive.
The freedom Sasuke gave them was no more than a gamble. And they were all betting on him.
"I think that's my cue to leave, then."
Sakura slowly got up, worried eyes never leaving his own. "It's best you stay for the night."
Stay forever.
"I can make it back on my own. Besides, where would I sleep?"
"With me."
"I already have."
He suddenly moved and in a mere second, Sasuke was in front of her. It was only the two of them now. One of his hands rose to stroke her cheek as onyx eyes visibly softened. Sakura closed her eyes and leaned into the tenderness of his touch.
Sasuke no longer had any fight left in him to try and figure out what it was she was doing to him.
"Stay."
"Do you want me to?"
He kissed her. It was slow and painful and intoxicating. Kissing Sakura was something he'd grown used to. Her touch and her warmth, he wanted all of it. But this kiss, unlike the rest, it was heavy. And she was crying, already anticipating what would happen tonight.
"I do."
But if Sakura was anything like him, she was crying because she, too, wanted it to happen.
author's note:
hi! how'd i do?
also sasuke retsuden is a thing. sasuke keeps telling people sakura's his wife. dude is hella proud and jealous. we love to see it. angsty king.
